Reawakening
by divergentpanda46
Summary: Uriah and Tris know that this shouldn't have been their time to die. They weren't ready, they weren't done yet. When they are given a second chance, can they save themselves and the people they love?
1. Prologue

_**A/N: This may not be an entirely original idea, but Uriah as Tris's partner in crime is a twist I haven't seen for this. :) Let me know what you think and I'm always open to ideas!**_

 _ **Disclaimer to serve for the whole story: I don't own anything. Divergent and all its characters are property of Veronica Roth. If you recognize the words, they're not mine.**_

 _ **This begins at chapter 50 of Allegiant; the italicized portion of the Prologue, specifically, is not my own work, it is Roth's; it's really just there for a smooth transition into the story.**_

 **PROLOGUE**

 _ **Tris**_

" _My mother wasn't a fool," I say. She just understood something you didn't. That it's not sacrifice if it's someone else's life you're giving away, it's just evil."_

 _I back up another step and say, "She taught me all about real sacrifice. That it should be done from love, not misplaced disgust for another person's genetics. That it should be done from necessity, not without exhausting all other options. That it should be done for people who need your strength because they don't have enough of their own. That's why I need to stop you from 'sacrificing' all those people and their memories. Why I need to rid the world of you once and for all."_

 _I shake my head._

" _I didn't come here to steal anything, David."_

 _I twist and lunge toward the device. The gun goes off and pain races through my body. I don't even know where the bullet hit me._

 _I can still hear Caleb repeating the code for Matthew. With a quaking hand I type in the numbers on the keypad._

 _The gun goes off again._

 _More pain, and black edges on my vision, but I hear Caleb's voice speaking again. The green button._

 _So much pain._

 _But how, when my body feels so numb?_

 _I start to fall, and slam my hand into the keypad on my way down. A light turns on behind the green button._

 _I hear a beep, and a churning sound._

 _I slide to the floor. I feel something warm on my neck, and under my cheek. Red. Blood is a strange color. Dark._

 _And from the corner of my eye, I see David slumped over in his chair._

 _And my mother walking out from behind him._

 _She is dressed in the same clothes she wore the last time I saw her, Abnegation gray, stained with her blood, with bare arms to show her tattoo. There are still bullet holes in her shirt; through them I can see her wounded skin, red but no longer bleeding, like she's frozen in time. Her dull blond hair is tied back in a knot, but a few loose strands frame her face in gold._

 _I know she can't be alive, but I don't know if I'm seeing her now because I'm delirious from the blood loss or if the death serum has addled my thoughts or if she is here in some other way._

 _She kneels next to me and touches a cool hand to my cheek._

" _Hello, Beatrice," she says and she smiles._

" _Am I done yet?" I say, and I'm not sure if I actually say it or if I just think it and she hears it._

" _Yes," she says, her eyes bright with tears. "My dear child, you've done so well."_

" _What about the others?" I choke on a sob as the image of Tobias comes into my mind, of how dark and how still his eyes were, how strong and warm his hand was, when we first stood face-to-face. "Tobias, Caleb, my friends?"_

" _They'll care for each other," she says. That's what people do."_

 _I smile and close my eyes._

 _I feel a thread tugging on me again, but this time I know it isn't some sinister force dragging me toward death._

 _This time I know it's my mother's hand, drawing me into her arms._

I feel another thread tugging the other way. Tugging me back to Tobias, to Caleb, to my friends. I am pulled between the two, wanting to go both ways at once.

But I am so tired, and the thread tugging the other way slips from my hand. I fall into my mother's embrace.

 _Can I be forgiven for all I've done to get here?_

 _I want to be._

 _I can._

 _I believe it._

* * *

I am surrounded by white. White light, white beneath me, white around me. I smile at my mother, then turn to see my father is here too. I run to his embrace.

But this is wrong. I've missed my family so much, but I left family that still needs me behind. Yes, they'll take care of each other, but Tobias…

I was always told that there are no tears in heaven. If heaven is where I am now, then that isn't true. I didn't want to leave him. I don't want to have left him. What have I done? I wasn't strong enough. Will I ever be at peace?

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

I am surrounded by black. It feels like it has been an eternity; it feels like no time at all. Sometimes I can hear voices. I can't make out what they are saying, but I know they are talking to me. Tris. Christina. Cara. Four.

Today there are more voices. Mom. Zeke.

Voices, and tears. So many tears. Even Zeke. I'm no longer surrounded entirely by black. Ahead of me, I finally see light. Just a pinprick. But it steadily grows as the voices steadily fade, as if they're farther and farther away, until I can't hear them at all, and I'm surrounded by white instead of black. White all around, and straight ahead I see Tris with a man and woman in blood-stained Abnegation gray clothing. The woman isn't wearing her robes, just pants and a tank top, and she has tattoos on her arms. Her arms are wrapped around Tris, whose body shakes in sobs.

"Tris?" I say. "Where are we? What happened?"

Tris abruptly stops sobbing, though she still hiccups in the aftermath. Her eyes are red and swollen, but wide, her mouth dropped open in an O. My eyes, however, are drawn to three gunshot wounds in her stomach, side and near her collarbone. It's then that I know where we are, or why anyway. We're dead.

"Uriah," she breathes as she runs full speed toward me, tackling me in a hug, then resumes sobbing.

"We're dead, aren't we?" I whisper, and she nods. Tears begin to fall from my eyes as well. Zeke… my mom… "I wasn't ready. I'm not ready."

"Neither am I."

The woman speaks. "We are not fully there, yet. You can't go back to where you just were, but you may be able to have another chance."

My head snaps in her direction. "Both of us? Like a re-do?"

"We don't belong here, Mom," Tris says. "How do we go back?"

"Please," I beg. If this is a real redo, maybe we can save Marlene. Lynn. Tori. Will. "Tris and I need to go back. We have to."

Tris hugs her dad, and then her mom, tears streaming down her face. "I'm sorry," she cries. "I love you."

"I love you, my dear girl," Tris's mother says, her hand cupping Tris's cheek. I feel a gentle hand on my shoulder and the words, "Be brave," and again I am surrounded in darkness.


	2. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER ONE**

 _ **Uriah**_

I wake with a start. I'm… in my bedroom? At Mom's? I haven't slept here in so long. Not since before we went to the Bureau…

Everything comes back to me in a flash, and my breathing quickens. Was that real? Was it a dream? If it was real, will Tris remember me? Will she help me fix everything that is bound to go wrong? What day is today?

In a panic, I throw on clothes as fast as I can before quickly using the bathroom, splashing water on my face, and brushing my teeth way too quickly to truly get them clean. The living room looks as I always remember it, and my school backpack sits by the door. Mom seems to be gone, maybe to work, I guess?

On a typical day, I would go to the dining hall for breakfast, so I do that next. I hope I can find out _when_ I came back to without anyone thinking I'm crazy. Luckily, when I slide in next to Zeke with a muffin in my hand, he asks me a question that relieves my curiosity instantly. "Hey, little bro! Nervous about your test?" Across the table from me, Marlene looks sick with anxiety. The aptitude test.

Speaking of Marlene, I can't take my eyes off of her. She takes my breath away. Marlene is average height, slender, but strong and curvy. Her light brown hair frames her face in ringlets, and her hazel eyes are bright and full of a love and excitement for life. There's a small scar on her forehead from falling out of a tree once when we were kids, and freckles pepper her nose. I just want to hold her, kiss her, God, I've missed her. But I realize, we aren't together yet. We're still just friends. This will be even worse for Tris- Four won't even know her.

"Nah, not at all," I answer, and it's true. I've done this before. I know what will happen. There's nothing to be nervous about. Everything after it? Sure. But not about my test. "I'm staying here either way, no reason to worry." Four is sat across the table, next to Marlene. "Excited for the new transfers tomorrow, Four?" I ask with a smirk. He gives me a confused look, as I'd expect. Because _I know,_ assuming that this wasn't just a very vivid, bizarre dream, that tomorrow, he will meet the love of his life. His world will never be the same.

"Uh, I guess," Four responds, still looking at me like I'm crazy.

"You'd better take the rest of that muffin to go, Uriah," Marlene interrupts as she gets up and slings her backpack onto her back. "We're going to miss the train if we don't hurry up."

I don't hesitate. I want to get to school and find Tris, as fast as I can.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

I wake in my bed in my Abnegation home. _That couldn't have been real. It was just a dream. An extremely detailed and strange dream. A very detailed, very real dream._ How can a dream leave me with my heart hurting like this? I'm so heavy with guilt for leaving Tobias. How can I fall so deeply in love in a _dream?_

"Beatrice," my mother calls, "hurry and get dressed. We need to cut your hair before you leave for school."

The last time my mother cut my hair was the day of my aptitude test. Or maybe that was the dream?

Once I'm dressed and my teeth are brushed, I hop onto the stool that is sitting in the hallway. My mother slides the panel back, revealing the mirror. I stare at myself in it as she snips at my hair. In my dream, I was strong, my hair was short, my eyes were… older looking. But today, I see the little girl I always had been before I chose Dauntless, or before I chose it in the dream. Weak and scrawny, a thin pale face with wide eyes and a nose that is too long, and my hair hangs more than halfway down my back.

"So, today is the day," my mother says.

Wait. She said that in my dream. "Yes," I answer nervously.

"Are you you nervous?"

"No," I lie, "the test doesn't have to change our choices." I _am_ nervous, though. I am nervous because when I take that test, I will know for sure whether that dream was real. I have never seen or heard what to expect in the aptitude test, there's no way I could correctly dream it.

I notice something I never had before. My mother stands sort of up on her toes, like she has too much energy, like she's ready to act. She stands like a Dauntless.

"Right," my mother says as she twists my hair into a bun and pins it in place. "Let's go eat breakfast."

"Thank you," I say, and I hug her tightly. "For cutting my hair," I add, though I have so much more to thank her for. Tomorrow, will I leave her? Will I go to Dauntless, like in the dream?

As soon as we get to school, I break away from Caleb as quickly as possible. I'm sure I'm being silly. Caleb didn't do all those things. It was a dream. It was only a dream. Caleb would not betray me like that. Still, I can't shake the anger and resentment I feel toward him.

In the hallway, an Erudite boy bumps into me and spits out, "watch where you're going, Stiff." This happened in my dream, as well. But this time, I don't fall. Somehow, I know how to keep myself steady. So I just clench my fists and glare at him, then resume my walk to faction history class.

That is, I begin to, but someone grabs my arm and pulls me off into a corner of the hallway. I turn, angry, until I see who it is. When I look at his face, I am a jumble of emotions. So happy to see him, so confused that I know him and he seems to know me, and terrified at what that means. My stomach twists. The shock must be evident on my face, because Uriah just sets his lips into a straight line and looks at me with one of the most serious expressions I've ever seen on his face. "So… I guess that was real."

I am so shocked I can't even speak. Finally Uriah gets impatient. "Tris?" _Oh my God. He called me Tris. That was really real. All that, it happened._

I nod slowly. "Apparently, yes."

"Look," Uriah says, "we've got to get to class. But we both get sent home early today, right?" I nod again. "Meet me by The Bean after your test. We need to talk." Then he smiles. "Oh, and it's good to see you, Trissy." He disappears into the crowd of students, leaving me reeling.

I'm terrified. All that happened in the dream… everything from Peter, Drew and Al kidnapping me to attack on Abnegation and everything that followed after… that was real. And I can only assume it will happen again. But my heart skips a beat at the realization that Tobias was real, too. Our love, it was real.

I'll have to choose between my family and myself, my Tobias, my friends. But I already have, haven't I? I already chose when Uriah and I chose to come back.

 _Tobias, I am coming back to you. We will always find each other._

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

When I pulled Tris aside, she looked like she just saw a ghost. I guess she was way more convinced than me that it was just a dream. Clearly, it wasn't. Tris and I didn't even know each other before she came to Dauntless. Super weird seeing her in her Abnegation clothes, though.

We had classes all morning, then lunch. The test is in the afternoon. Which means, it's now. All the sixteen year olds are sitting grouped by faction outside the testing rooms. Last time, I was playing cards with Marlene, so I'm trying to do that again, but I'm distracted. My eyes are on the Abnegation table, and I see that Tris's eyes are on me as well.

"Uriah! Where is your mind today?!" Marlene laughs. "You know this game requires you to actually pay attention, right?"

Instead of answering her question, I blurt out, "Have you ever thought much about how we all keep so separate from each other?" Marlene furrows her eyebrows. "I mean, we're all dependents, we won't necessarily end up in the factions we were born in, why don't we ever talk to each other?"

"Uhhh… no, I can't say I've given that much thought," Marlene answers, eyebrows raised. "I mean… we know why. That was the whole point of taking faction history for ten straight years of school."

"Yeah… but do you really think we can only be _one_ thing? Okay like for example, bravery. It takes bravery to be honest all the time, don't you think?" Marlene frowns. "And selflessness. Like what we are supposed to do is risk our own lives to protect others, isn't it? Isn't that selflessness? But it definitely takes courage to do it."

"Uriah…" Marlene says slowly. "You're kinda scaring me." Then she laughs as she says, "you and these deep thoughts, it's like we're in an alternate universe." _Well, yeah, we kinda are, Mar._

I just shrug. "I dunno, I guess… I like to think I'm kind. I think you are kind, too, Mar. But we're still both brave, right?"

"So, is that why it's _always_ a Dauntless-born who jumps first on choosing day? Because the other factions can be just as brave? I don't think so." _Bad move, Mar. I know who jumps first this year._

"Well, there _is_ the fact that most of us know what's at the bottom. But I will bet you," I say with a smirk, "that it's a transfer that jumps first this year. And you can't go first if you take this bet. That wouldn't be fair. You can't talk Lynn into it, either."

"Okay." Marlene has this self-satisfied smile, like she's as good as won. "What will I win?"

"It doesn't really matter, because you won't," I answer with a cocky smile, "but… hmm… if _you_ win, then… you can have my Dauntless cake for a whole week." Marlene's jaw drops in shock. _Yeah, I really love that cake. I'm pulling out the big guns here._ "And if I win, I get _your_ cake for a whole week."

"Okay," she grins, "you're gonna regret it when you're watching me eat your cake! So, which faction do you expect to jump first?"

"Abnegation," I answer immediately. _Shit. I shouldn't have said that. The only Stiff who's ever transferred is Four. Now she's gonna know something is up!_

I laugh to play it off as a joke, and Marlene joins me, nearly doubling over. "If it's a Stiff that jumps first," she says loudly, still laughing, "-and that's _if_ a Stiff transfers to Dauntless at all-I'll give you my cake for a whole _month._ "

"I still get a week of cake though, if it's a transfer from Candor or Erudite?" She nods. I know Tris will transfer, and I know she will jump first. Especially now, with Four waiting at the bottom. "Then yes, you're on. Nothing to lose, right?" Tris was close enough to hear the whole thing and she's smirking at me. 'You'll be sharing with me,' she mouths and I burst out laughing again.

Marlene gives me a look that says, 'you're a weirdo,' but I'm saved by the test administrator when an Abnegation lady calls, "Uriah Pedrad." As I walk to my testing room, I hear Tori call 'Beatrice Prior' and realize after a moment that she's calling Tris. I glance over at Tris as she walks to her test as well, and she looks back at me. I wink at her as I enter the room and sit in the simulation chair.

I jump when the test administrator sits down on a stool beside me. _I just saw her last night._ It was Tris's mom. Hopefully she thinks I'm just nervous as I gape at her while she puts the electrodes on me, then on herself. It's not until she hands me the little cup of liquid that I realize, I don't know what to do when I get into the sim. Should I try to get a straight Dauntless result, pretend that I am not aware? I still don't know what to do when I drink the serum.

* * *

I open my eyes to a familiar scene: I'm in the cafeteria alone, and there is snow falling outside. On a table ahead of me are two bowls. "Choose," a voice says. I have to make up my mind fast. I choose the knife. The bowls disappear.

Now, the dog. I'm ready for him. He charges at me, growling, and I stick the knife through his neck. The dog falls, dead.

I fall through the floor and land in the bus. The man asks if I know the guy whose picture is in the newspaper, and I say no. He persists, and I still say no.

* * *

Tris's mom smiles at me. "You showed an aptitude for Dauntless, Uriah. Good luck at the choosing ceremony tomorrow!"

I smile at her and sigh in relief. I did it.


	3. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

 _ **Tris**_

I sneak out of school after my test. I managed to hide my divergence for the test, so Tori didn't send me home.

The big metal bean grows in my vision as I near it, and soon I see Uriah. I break into a run and he grins as I crash into him, throwing my arms around him. "Thank God you remember, too," I say.

"I know," he says, "I couldn't do this on my own."

"So we're going to try to save everyone, right?" I ask. "Obviously my parents, Will, Marlene, Lynn, Tori.."

"Maybe even Al," he shrugs. "Hell, maybe, we can stop the whole war." His face darkens. "But… I don't think we should reveal that video. We know what's on it and what is really out there. I don't think it's worth it. The only thing that would be is Amar and George, but that's not enough. Four doesn't need to know that he's 'damaged', because he's not, and it made him all… mopey. I mean, I know dark and broody is kinda his thing, but that really wasn't too pleasant for anyone." I chuckle. It certainly was not pleasant. Least of all, for Tobias. Scratch that: least of all for Uriah, considering that it contributed to his death. "You know what happens to us there, and that Tori gets shot on our way, and that all it did was let us know that all of this is a lie when it's not."

"What do you mean, it's not?" I ask. Of course it is. It's all some made up bullshit from the Bureau. Just a stupid experiment to try and fix a problem that isn't actually a problem. Then again, it seems better than what's out there.

"It doesn't really matter how we got the factions. It's still how we were raised and how we all understand society works. People will divide around one thing or another no matter what. We won't improve anyone's life by telling them; we just need to get rid of people like Jeanine Matthews."

He's right. When did Uriah get so deep, anyway? I suppose everyone has some kind of belief system, and this is ours. It's how the world makes sense to us. We can still improve it, but within what's already here. We just have to keep the war from getting bad so that they won't release the memory serum virus. And we can always re-evaluate this decision later.

"Okay," I say. "So tomorrow we both choose Dauntless again and… I don't know, I think we should probably try to keep things the same as much as we can, right? One difference can change the entire cause and effect chain. Do that over something dumb and we could end up with hardly any advantage at all."

Uriah nods. "It's going to be hard," he says. "I think especially for you." I know what he means. Tobias won't even know me. I want to hold him, to kiss him, so badly, and I know I'll have to wait _weeks._ While around him every day. It will be torture.

"Do you really think we could hurt anything if we got together with Four and Marlene… a _little_ sooner…? God, I don't think I can wait that long, can you?!"

"We'll see how things go. Just be careful." Uriah pushes off the bean sculpture he was leaning against, picking up his backpack. "We should get going home I think. But I'll see you tomorrow! We should meet… after lights out? 11:30?"

"By the chasm?" I ask. He nods. "Okay. Tomorrow. See you at the ceremony!" I smile and give him one more quick hug before I jog toward my bus stop.

* * *

It is a struggle to act like an Abnegation after spending the past few months as a Dauntless. Even just hearing them say my name, I want to correct them and demand that they call me 'Tris' instead. Still, everything has gone smoothly tonight until we are in the middle of dinner and my mother asks my father about his day.

"Is this about that report Jeanine Matthews released?" my mother says. I stay quiet. I already know what the report was about.

My father sighs. His eyes narrow. "Yes. Those arrogant, self-righteous-" He stops and clears his throat. "Sorry. But she released a report attacking Marcus's character… that Marcus's violence and cruelty toward his son are the reason he chose Dauntless instead of Abnegation."

At the mention of Tobias, my stomach clenches. Tomorrow, I can see him. With that thought, I have butterflies in my stomach.

"That poor man," Mom says. "As if he needs to be reminded of his loss."

"Of his son's betrayal, you mean? I shouldn't be surprised at this point. The Erudite have been attacking us with these reports for months. And this isn't the end. There will be more, I guarantee it."

I couldn't help speaking up last time either, but this time I can't help speaking about something different. I can't stand to let him talk that way about Tobias. "What do you mean about Tobias's betrayal? Aren't we supposed to pick the place we fit? Faction before blood? If this wasn't the life that was right for him, what's wrong with him transferring to the faction where he belongs? It's his life, he's the one that has to live it." I bite my cheek to keep from saying anything about Marcus.

My father looks at me with wide eyes, his mouth hanging open. Even for me- I've always been more outspoken than the typical Abnegation- that little outburst was not normal.

My parents stare at me like they're not sure how to answer. I suppose the reason no one ever transfers out of Abnegation is because we are raised to be selfless, to never just think of ourselves. I sigh. "It just seems to me that Choosing Day is when you _should_ think of yourself. It's when you get to stop trying to fit a round peg into a square hole. There isn't a chance to change it later."

"But it is selfish to choose for yourself rather than others," my father reminds me.

"Isn't it also selfish to expect someone to choose the rest of their life for you instead of for themselves?" I am challenging him far more than I should. However, I suppose when I choose Dauntless tomorrow, this conversation will all make perfect sense.

My father looks how I imagine he would if I had just slapped him in the face: completely stunned. He cocks his head to the side and bites his lip, just like I do when I am thinking. I got that from him. "That is an interesting perspective, Beatrice," he finally says. "If either of you were to transfer I would miss you very much. I hope you don't. I will always love you, though, no matter what your choice is."

I smile. That was what I needed to hear from him. "I will choose the place where I can be the best version of me," I assure him. He smiles at me, but it doesn't reach his eyes. My mother reaches out and strokes my hair softly, a warm, sad smile on her face. She knows I'll leave. I think she has always known.

After dinner, my parents again do the dishes so Caleb and I be alone to think about our choice. I don't really need to think about my choice, but I do need to think about everything that comes after it.

At the top of the stairs, I stop Caleb, instead of him stopping me. I can't look at him without remembering how he betrayed me in Erudite, even if he technically hasn't done that yet. I hardly know who he is anymore. "Caleb, I want you to know that I love you. Choose what is right for you, but once you do… never forget who you were. There is good in bad in every faction, and you can use every virtue for good or for evil. Remember to choose the good." I leave him standing in the hall, closing my bedroom door behind me.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

I slide in next to Marlene with a plate of lasagna that night in the dining hall. Zeke and Four are sitting across from us. "How'd your test go?" I ask Marlene. We're not really supposed to talk about the tests, but we don't take silly rules that seriously in Dauntless. Besides, this time I got a straight up Dauntless result, so I have nothing to hide. It was different last time, when my result had to be entered manually. I still think it's weird that I have aptitude for Dauntless and Amity. It seems like such a strange combination. I'm not really sure what to think about all the shit the Bureau said about 'genetic damage'. They say all these people sitting around me are 'damaged' but that isn't what I see.

I see Zeke: funny, loyal, brave and kind. Four, who isn't genetically 'healed' after all, apparently, and yet has overcome so much to be one of the best people I could ever know. And Marlene… God, I've missed her. She is sweet, fun, brave, kind, honest, beautiful… perfect.

I was not so impressed with the supposably 'genetically pure' at the Bureau. They were as bad as Jeanine Matthews and Eric. Closed-minded, stuck up and cruel. They didn't seem to even see the residents of Chicago as _people._ Just like Jeanine Matthews when she did all that testing on Tris because of her divergence.

Marlene shrugs. "It went fine. I think killing that dog might have scarred me for life. But, things went as expected. You all are stuck with me."

"There's no one I'd rather be stuck with," I say with a grin. She looks down at her plate, smiling slightly as she bites her lower lip.

"Aren't you guys supposed to be keeping your results a secret, and keeping to yourselves to 'think about your choice' tonight?" Four asks with an eyebrow raised.

I shrug. "Sure, but there's nothing to think about. My decision is made. And I guess you'll just have to wait and see what that decision is." I doubt Four cares that much where I go, but I can see that Zeke is nervous. "Calm down, Zeke. You know I love it here."

I turn to Marlene. "So. Initiation begins tomorrow and we won't be able to leave the compound alone till it's over. Wanna get out of here for a while, Marlene?" I wiggle my eyebrows at her, and she punches my shoulder, blushing slightly and smiling coyly. "Navy Pier?"

"Sure!" Marlene says as she stuffs the rest of her garlic bread in her mouth and begins to gather up her trash. "Let's go!"

Marlene and I have the boxcar to ourselves on the way to Navy Pier. I watch her hold the handles with both hands and lean her torso out into the wind, her light brown curls billowing behind her. I feel like I just got her back and I don't know for how long, but I desperately want to keep her. Just looking at her hazel eyes stirs up butterflies in my stomach.

Marlene leans back into the boxcar, turning her head toward me with a dazzling smile I'd be content to look at all day. "It's time to jump!" I watch her back up a few steps, then run and leap. I follow her, then jog to catch up, sliding an arm around her shoulders as I do. I know she won't think much of it since I've never been shy about things like this, but it feels so good to be able to touch her and know that she is real, she's really here.

It's a short walk to the old amusement park rides. The old ferris wheel looms in the distance. It will forever remind me of Tris climbing it during the capture the flag. That was when Tris caught my attention. She was so smart and so fearless, not at all like the weak little stiff everyone expected her to be.

I know the ferris wheel still runs, but I wonder if the carousel does too? I grin at Marlene and her eyes go wide as she begins to back away. "What are you planning there, Uriah?"

"What, you don't trust me? I'm hurt," I reply, slowly walking toward her.

She shakes her head and starts to run, but my legs are longer and I am faster. Marlene shrieks when I grab her by the waist and throw her over my shoulder. I run to the carousel, laughing the whole way, with her pounding her fists on my back, screaming at me to put her down.

"As you wish!" We've reached the carousel. I grab her waist again and drop her on one of the chipped, faded wooden horses. This one has a purple saddle and is missing half its tail. "Stay there."

Finding the controls, I move levers and switches. First the music starts to play, then I see the carousel begin to slowly move counter-clockwise and hear Marlene's laugh. I grin as I slowly push back the lever that controls the speed, till it's going kind of fast, but not so fast that I won't be able to jump down and turn it off without injuring myself. I might not normally be worried about that, but the last thing I need is to go into initiation with a broken leg or something.

I jump onto the carousel platform, but it's moving too fast to stick the landing and I topple over, catching myself with my hands around one of the poles that holds the horses up. Making my way to Marlene is easier- I'm used to walking on things in motion after traveling in trains all my life. The footholds on the horse next to Marlene's are broken off, but I don't have much trouble hoisting myself up.

Once I'm up, Marlene just looks at me with a wide grin and giggles. "How did you know this still worked?"

I shrug, then tap my index finger to my head. "Psychic," I whisper as if it were a secret. Though she'll probably think maybe it's true after Tris jumps first tomorrow. That's okay, though. It could work to my advantage later when it comes to keeping her safe during the war.

When we get bored of riding the carousel, I hold out my hand to help Marlene down, grinning at the familiar sparks of electricity I feel when her skin touches mine. The sun is setting now. Marlene sighs. "We should get back. Tomorrow is a big day." I nod and hold out my hand without thinking. Mar gives me a surprised look and her cheeks get a little pinker, but she takes my hand with a small smile as we begin our walk back to the train tracks.


	4. Chapter 3

_Hey everyone! Thanks so much for the reviews- I'm excited that already a few people seem to be enjoying this story. Please do take a second to review if you're so inclined... reviews make me happy. :)_

 **CHAPTER THREE**

 _ **Uriah**_

All my life, The City was all that existed, our entire world. Now I know a lot of things I didn't before. I know that Chicago, which we only call The City (since its the only city we have), and now holds around fifty thousand residents, was once home more than two and a half million people. I now know that Chicago, in terms of land area, is 'such a small percentage as to be negligible', I think I was told, in the scheme of the whole world. I now know that the Sears Tower was once the tallest building in the world, and the broadcasting center for many television and radio stations.

The tower is now called The Hub, and each year, the Choosing Ceremony is hosted here on the twentieth floor. In the lobby, I catch Tris's eye and smile at her. The Abnegation are all taking the stairs and I grin when she almost imperceptibly rolls her eyes.

The elevator doors open and the first wave of people pack it full. I am shoulder to shoulder with Zeke and my mother. "I can't believe my baby brother's Choosing Day is here already," Zeke says in mock sadness, wiping an imaginary tear from below his eye. "It seems like just yesterday he was wetting the bed. Oh, wait, maybe that _was_ just yesterday!"

"Shut up, Ezekiel," I mutter. I don't wet the bed. Not since I was seven. Yeah, okay, that's still pretty embarrassing.

The elevator lets us out at the twentieth floor. The ceremony takes place in a big room arranged in concentric circles, kind of like the bullseye targets in the practice rooms. The families all sit in sections arranged by faction, while all the sixteen year olds line up in alphabetical order around the perimeter of the room- the same order we will be called in, but backwards- beginning with Z and ending with A.

Before I go to find my spot, my mother puts her hands on my shoulders, looking up into my eyes. I've been taller than my mom for several years now, and I passed up Zeke around the time he went through his own choosing ceremony two years ago. My mom and Zeke have the same coloring as me: light brown skin, curly dark hair, and chocolate brown eyes. Mom stands a good seven or eight inches shorter than me now.

"Uriah, my baby," Mom says with tears in her eyes. I roll my eyes slightly at her calling me a 'baby', but she knows I don't mean it and I'm just playing. "I hope you will be coming home to us. But I want you to know I love you and I support whatever life is right for you. You go where you can do the most good in the world with your own unique strengths and where you know you belong."

"I love you, Momma," I say, wrapping my arms around her. "And don't worry," I whisper. "I'll see you soon."

Mom pats my cheek lightly, smiling through tears. "Go find your spot, now. Be brave." I watch her disappear into the crowd as I find a teacher to direct me to the right spot in line. I realize for the first time that I am to stand right next to Tris. And on her other side, that traitor Caleb. I mean, yeah, he wasn't so bad at the very end, but I'd still rather forget he ever existed.

"You ready for this, _Beatrice?_ " I know that Dauntless Tris hates being called by her full name, but it's the only one she has until she lands in that net, so I intend to take full advantage.

Tris elbows me lightly in the arm. "Shut up," she whispers, trying not to grin. I snicker.

"You ready for all this Dauntless cake we're winning in my bet with Mar?" I whisper, and her lips twist into a grin that almost looks diabolical. "You know, you're pretty scary, Tris."

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

"That's the same Dauntless boy you were staring at yesterday," Caleb whispers accusingly. We're at the Choosing Ceremony and it seems my spot in line is right next to Uriah, so he's been whispering things at me and teasing me in typical Uriah fashion. After seeing him practically dead in that hospital bed at the Bureau, seeing his smile is the best thing in the world. Well, until I get to 'meet' Tobias today. I'm so close to seeing him… so close.

I shrug. Caleb whispers again. "Beatrice! Is there something going on? Don't choose factions over some boy!"

"I wouldn't do that, Caleb. I'm not stupid." Maybe it's good if he thinks I'm transferring for Uriah. Then when Jeanine asks him about me, he can tell her I transferred for a boy I liked, and she won't question it so much. I managed to receive a straight Dauntless result in my aptitude test simulation yesterday, so Tori did not have to verbally report my result, though I could tell she still suspected that I was aware in my simulation. That's okay- Tori won't do anything to put me in danger. Still, with how rare it is for Abnegation to transfer, especially to Dauntless, there will automatically be some suspicion on Jeanine's part. "It might be a tie-breaker, though. You ever met him in classes? He's cute and nice and fun." All true, though I honestly didn't know a thing about Uriah last time we went through this ceremony.

Caleb glares at Uriah as Marcus starts the ceremony. I tune Marcus out- been there, done that, and I'd rather just forget that the sadistic bastard exists. If only people knew how different the real Marcus was from the mask he shows the public.

Caleb continues to shoot glares at Uriah. "What's Caleb's problem?" Uriah whispers, leaning down to my ear.

I roll my eyes and turn my head to answer, his head still lowered to my level. "He thinks I have a thing for you." Uriah begins to silently snicker. "I figured I'd just let him believe it, throw off suspicion over my choice." Uriah nods and straightens up.

I look around for my parents in the section of gray-clad Abnegation. My mother smiles contentedly, while my father's forehead shows worry lines. He's anxious. After last night, I'm sure he suspects that I won't stay. Caleb, however, will still be a surprise, surely.

Marcus begins to call the names out, and soon-to-be-initiates begin to step forward. Most of them choose the same faction they came from, but here and there, someone chooses to drop their blood into a different bowl than expected.

Caleb gives my hand a final squeeze before walking up to the podium, casting one last glance at me over his shoulder. He cuts his palm, takes a deep breath and shakily lets his blood fall into the Erudite bowl. I shake my head in disappointment. I knew this was what would happen, but I still pointlessly hoped that he would stay in Abnegation… that he wouldn't eventually betray me. The rest of Abnegation, however, cries out in despair, outrage, anger, surprise. The Erudite look around with smug smirks. I glare at them in disgust.

"Beatrice Prior," Marcus says into the microphone.

"See you on the other side," Uriah whispers with a smile. I return his smile and walk to Marcus to accept the knife. I'm not nervous or scared. My heart doesn't pound, and my breath isn't shaky. I know exactly what I am getting myself into- which is probably why I _should_ be scared- but all I can think is that I am one step closer to Tobias. One step closer to our happily ever after.

I accept the knife. Again, I cut my palm a little too deep. This time, I'm excited, not scared. I let the blood pool in my hand, and confidently thrust it over the Dauntless coals. I hear the sizzle of liquid on fire and Marcus's announcement: "Dauntless."

Another round of outraged cries from Abnegation as Dauntless welcomes me with hoots and hollers, foot stomping and fist pumping. I cannot help grinning- the sound is comforting. It feels like home.

Soon, Uriah has made his choice and comes to stand beside me. We grin at each other and bump fists. Slowly the rest of the initiates join us and instead of being surrounded by strangers, I am surrounded by friends- and enemies, but mostly friends. They may not know that we're friends yet, but we will be, and their presence is comforting, but also energizing. My body is buzzing with anticipation.

Marcus nears the end of the long line of sixteen year olds- all that's left are three girls with last names that begin with A. I take this opportunity to take one more look at my parents. My mother smiles, looking directly at me. My father is looking down mournfully. Not the angry, betrayed expression he wore the first time I chose Dauntless, just sad. I can't fault him for that; leaving them- especially for the second time- it's sad for me, too, but it is what I must do, not just for me, but for them, for Tobias, for all my friends.

The last name is called, and the ceremony is concluded. I feel the familiar rush of adrenaline pumping through my veins as the Dauntless cheer and begin to stampede down the stairs. I don't look back. I just run down the stairs with a smile so wide, my face begins to ache. I run with everything I have in me. When my weak, previously unchallenged Abnegation Beatrice body begins to scream at me in exhaustion I just run harder: every step I take, I am one step closer to my Tobias.

I know what we're doing next, and while I certainly know how to get on and off a moving train, I know my body hasn't yet developed the strength and muscle memory I remember having. Just as well- getting on faster would mean I would end up in the Dauntless-born car, but I need to be with the transfers, to meet Christina. Just the thought of seeing her again brings another smile to my face.

When we arrive at the platform I hear the train whistle in the distance and bounce on the balls of my feet in anticipation. Tobias always has said that he will always come back to me; now it is my turn to come back to him.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

The last several months of my reality, my faction has been divided by war, killing off the people I care about one by one. So, running from the Hub to the train and waiting with my undivided faction to jump on and begin my initiation are some of the most exhilarating moments of my sixteen- (or seventeen, depending how you want to count it) years. It is pure joy, and pure relief. They say you don't know what you've got till it's gone, and that's true, but getting it back like this takes that to a whole other level.

Marlene is smiling as wide as I am, and even the corners of Lynn's mouth turn up a bit. As the train nears us, we run to match its speed, throwing ourselves in. I look out the open door and see transfers struggling to get into the last car; one doesn't make it onto the train. He is now factionless. It's actually not as bad a fate as I was led to believe, so I don't dwell on his situation.

"Did you notice, Marlene? There's a Stiff this year." I smirk at her.

She narrows her eyes at me. "How did you know a Stiff would transfer? They never transfer."

I tap my index finger on my skull. "I told you yesterday. Psychic." She rolls her eyes. "I had a hunch."

"Did you know it would be her?"

"I saw her watching us." I shrug. "It just seemed unusual, a Stiff so interested in Dauntless."

Lynn shrugs. "She won't make it through initiation anyway. Did you see how scrawny she was? She'll be cut by the end of the first round."

"We'll just have to wait and see, Lynn."

We gossip about the ceremony- who stayed, who transferred, whether we were surprised or not- and before I know it, someone shouts to let us know that the cars ahead of us are jumping out of the train. The net entrance of Dauntless is only used by initiates and members, never by dependants, but most of us know about the net, anyway. Somehow, that hasn't seemed to make it any easier to jump off the ledge.

One after another, we run and jump out of the moving train and onto the roof. There's a gap between the two so it's a pretty big risk; from seven stories up, you're not going to survive the fall if you miss the roof. I land on my feet without a problem, as do Lynn and Marlene, but I remember exactly what happened when I hear the screams. Rita, another Dauntless-born, leans over the edge of the roof in hysterics. Her sister lays unmoving, seven stories below us on the street, her limbs splayed out at unnatural angles. "Rita," I coax, "Rita, I know. I'm so sorry. Come away from the edge." I continue talking to her as I lead her away and into the arms of her friend Kate. I join Marlene and Lynn again just as Max steps onto a ledge on the roof and begins his speech.

"Listen up! My name is Max! I am one of the leaders of your new faction!" shouts our head leader. "Several stories below us is the members' entrance to our compound. If you can't muster the will to jump off, you don't belong here. Our initiates have the privilege of going first."

An Erudite girl speaks up. I think her name was Myra. Her boyfriend, I remember, was Edward, the guy Peter stabbed in the eye. "You want us to jump off a _ledge?"_

Max smirks. I can tell he gets a kick out of this. "Yes."

"Is there water at the bottom or something?"

"Who knows?" he replies with his eyebrows raised.

By this point, my eyes are on Tris, my mouth curled into a smirk. As she takes her first step toward the ledge, I elbow Marlene, who looks between me and Tris with her mouth hanging open. "Thanks for the cake," I whisper, chuckling.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

I stand on the roof, listening to Max's little speech. I'm dizzy with excitement. It's just minutes, _minutes!,_ until I will see- or I guess technically, meet- my Tobias. I know he won't know me, I know this is going to be hell on earth for a while, but he's here, and I am here, and I know we will be together.

Seeing my transfer friends on the train was surreal. Christina, well, I just saw her two days ago, right? But it's different. I can see now just how much these months of war changed us all. How weary, how much older and more tired it made us. But the hardest part was seeing Will.

I am so happy to have him back, of course. But it's like seeing a ghost. A ghost that haunts your nightmares. He was one of my best friends, and I killed him. Why didn't I shoot him in the leg or the arm? Now, I remind myself, I get to make it right.

"Is there water at the bottom or something?" I hear Myra ask, and I start to unbutton my jacket.

"Who knows?" Max says with raised eyebrows. Two more buttons. I begin to walk forward, and the crowd parts for me. I glance quickly at Uriah and see him smirking, nudging a shocked Marlene. I throw my jacket at Peter, hard. I'm so lightheaded in anticipation, my head could just float away, like a helium balloon. I step onto the ledge, smirk at Max and glance back at the other initiates one more time with a grin, then waste no more time: I jump.

I put my arms and legs straight out as I fall, relishing the feeling of freedom and open air. Just seconds now. Just seconds until Tobias reaches out his hand to pull me out of this net.

I land against the net and bounce a few times, laughing with joy. I see Tobias's hand reaching out for me, among others, but I know him. I recognize his hands, his astonishingly long fingers, and I grab hold of him. The electricity that shoots through me at his touch leaves me giddy. I roll off, just like last time, so that he can catch me again.

I take him in, the face I now know so well. His hair is short again, not like the last time I saw it. I scan his face as if I'm checking to make sure he's all there. His spare upper lip and full lower lip, hooked nose, the slight scar on his chin. And best of all, his eyes. That deep, dark blue, with the little light blue patch on one iris.

And this time, I know him. I know that he doesn't usually touch people. I know that the look in his eyes, it's one he doesn't give everyone. The butterflies in my stomach are fluttering again.

His hands grip my arms, but he releases me once I'm upright. I want him to hold onto me again. I want to kiss him. But I know I can't. Not yet. "Thank you," I say.

"I can't believe it," Lauren says, smirking at me. "A stiff? First to jump? Unheard of!"

I smile with satisfaction when Tobias defends me. "There's a reason why she left them, Lauren." God, his voice. So deep, rumbling… "What's your name?"

I don't hesitate this time. "Tris," I say with total confidence.

"Tris," Lauren repeats, grinning. "Make the announcement, Four."

Tobias yells over his shoulder, "First jumper- Tris!" As Christina falls into the net screaming, he puts his hand to the small of my back, and I close my eyes for a moment so I can just enjoy his touch. I will experience it so little in the next few weeks. "Welcome to Dauntless."


	5. Chapter 4

_Shout out to FourtrisHEA- thanks for being such an awesome sounding board! Love the ideas you share with me. You're the best!_

 **CHAPTER FOUR**

 _ **Uriah**_

"How did… what…" Marlene stutters after Tris's small figure disappears over the ledge. "How did you know?!" At the ledge, Christina is jumping; unlike Tris, she screams her head off. "Seriously how? How did you even _think_ to say Abnegation would jump first? Stiffs never transfer to Dauntless!"

There is really no explanation I can think of that she'll accept. I shrug. "I just know things. I had a feeling."

"That must have been one strong feeling, if you risked a week's worth of Dauntless cake for it."

"Yeah, but look what I ended up getting out of it! A whole _month_ of extra cake!" Marlene scowls at me. "Come on, let's get down there." Lynn has already gotten in line to jump, and I stand behind her. Marlene follows me.

"I'm starting to think you really _are_ psychic. Like you just woke up yesterday with this new superpower. First the carousel, now the Stiff?"

"Can you two shut up?" Lynn snaps. Maybe she's nervous about jumping. Peter is about to jump and Lynn is lined up to jump after him.

"Well, the Stiff seems cool. We should try and make friends with her." Marlene shrugs as Lynn jumps off the ledge.

Now it's my turn. I know there's nothing to be afraid of here. I don't have a clue why I didn't volunteer sooner last time around. As soon as Max signals that it's clear to go, I let myself fall backward. It feels almost like flying or something, free falling such a long distance. I scream on the way down, just because I think that makes things like jumping off high things and zip lining more fun, and when my body hits the net, I bounce into the air and back to the net a few times before my body finally settles into it and I can pull myself out. Marlene soon tumbles into the net and rolls out next to me on the platform.

When we reach the bottom Marlene marches up to Tris and Christina. "Hi," she says with a smile, "I'm Marlene." Tris and Christina respond with their own names. "So, _Tris,_ I have a question for you."

"Um, okay…."

Marlene grabs my arm and pulls me toward her. "Did Uriah here tell you about the net before you jumped? Did he tell you to go first?"

Tris laughed. "No to both. I did not know about the net until I first landed in it." I smirk at her careful choice of words- _first_ landed in it.

Marlene sighs as I introduce myself to Tris and Christina. Soon all the initiates have jumped and gathered at the bottom of the platform, and Lauren and Four stand in front of the group. With a wave of her hand, Lauren gestures for us all to follow as she and Four start down the dark tunnel.

The Dauntless compound is mostly underground, basically carved out of stone, so it's a pretty dark place. The hallways have blue globe lanterns hanging at intervals, a lot like the ones at the Choosing Ceremony. I grew up here, though, so I've always been able to see in the dark. The transfers, however, seem to be walking blind, so when Lauren and Four stop, it causes a bit of a pile-up. I'm glad I stayed off to one side.

"This is where we divide," Lauren says. "Dauntless born, you're with me. I assume _you_ don't need a tour of the place." With that, she leads us away from Four and his initiates. We keep walking until we arrive at our dormitory. A half-dozen bunk beds are lined up against the wall; we'll all sleep here, boys and girls together.

"Alright, listen up!" Lauren yells. Slowly the chatter dies out, then Lauren continues in a more normal voice. "In case anyone does not know… you will train separate from the transfers, but you will all be ranked together. Only the top ten ranked will become members; those who do not make the top ten will leave Dauntless and live factionless. The bottom four initiates will be cut at the end of stage one, and the rest after the final exam. Training begins each morning at eight and ends at six with a break for lunch mid-day. Do not be late to training! You all know where to go. Now would be a good time to gather anything you need from your parents' homes, then come to the dining hall for dinner. See you all at eight AM sharp tomorrow!" Lauren then vanishes out the door of the dormitory.

I climb onto a top bunk and peel off my hoodie to leave there and stake my claim. Marlene takes the top bunk of the bed next to me, and Lynn chooses to be Mar's bunkmate and sleep below her. "C'mon, guys, let's go get our stuff from home and get to the cafeteria. I'm really looking forward to that second piece of cake." Marlene glares at me, and I chuckle and toss an arm over her shoulders on the way out the dormitory door.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

I wait by the net for the first initiate to jump. "I bet you it's one of my Dauntless-born," Lauren, the Dauntless-born trainer, says.

"It's always a Dauntless-born. No bet." The initiates that were born here at Dauntless usually have the advantage of knowing that a net will catch them at the bottom of the drop. The cultures of our factions determine how we are raised, what is valued and encouraged. Dauntless dependants are curious and adventurous, so they've usually explored the compound enough by the age of sixteen to be aware of the net. They also grow up with an all-or-nothing mentality; when they do something, they commit and see it through. They don't hold back. For a transfer to just innately have that same mentality and personality without it being practiced would be extremely unusual.

I hear Max giving the speech and I get ready for the first one to drop. Typically, it takes a few minutes and some taunting for anyone to get the courage to jump but this year, it's nearly immediate, and when it's a small blur of gray, I'm shocked. _Abnegation?!_ Not just any Abnegation. This is a girl is so small, it's hard to believe that she could be sixteen. She looks so fragile, I'm surprised the landing in the net didn't shatter her to pieces. She doesn't scream on the way down and when she lands she giggles with joy. That's right, she actually _giggles._

I reach my hand into the net and she grabs hold. As she rolls out, she loses her balance, and I catch her, a hand on each arm to steady her. As I had first noticed, she's very small and fragile looking. A full foot shorter than me, scrawny. Her long blond hair is still in its standard Abnegation-style bun, but several strands have come loose and hang framing her face. She has full, pouty lips, a thin, straight nose, and piercing blue eyes. They are large and round and have me absolutely mesmerised. Her eyes stare directly into mine, and I could swear she's looking into my soul. It's as if she can see right through every wall I've spent my whole life building and it's unnerving. Even stranger, it's not one-sided. She seems familiar, but not because I know her from Abnegation. It's deeper than that; a connection waiting to be explored.

Lauren breaks my trance. "A Stiff? First to jump? Unheard of!"

I shouldn't care- I'm not a Stiff any more, and I certainly did not jump first my year. In fact I was last. But for some reason, I can't help defending this small but fierce girl. "There's a reason why she left them, Lauren." I turn back to my first jumper. "What's your name?"

The girl smiles and answers without hesitation, "Tris." Huh. I don't remember anyone in Abnegation named Tris.

"Tris," Lauren repeats. "Make the announcement, Four!"

I call over my shoulder, "First jumper- Tris!" As the next initiate- a Candor this time- lands in the net screaming her head off, I guide Tris to the stairs with my hand on her back. "Welcome to Dauntless," I say.

* * *

I have just finished showing my initiates around the Pit and the Chasm. This is my second year training the transfer initiates. The group is made up of five Candor, three Erudite, and, much to my surprise, one Abnegation. Up to now, I was the sole Abnegation transfer in the history of Dauntless, so for another to come just two years later is a shock.

I lead my group of transfers into the dining hall. Members cheer and stomp feet and pound their fists on the table in welcome as I make my way to a nearly empty table on the far side of the room. Tris ends up sitting next to me with Christina on the other side.

I take a bite of my hamburger and notice Tris eyeing her own curiously. It brings me back to my first meal in Dauntless and how foreign the food was. I nudge her with my elbow. "It's beef. Here, put this on it." I pass her a bowl of ketchup. Tris smiles slightly at me in thanks.

"You've never had a hamburger before?" Christina asks in shock. Somehow it doesn't surprise me that a Candor would be so oblivious to cultural differences between the factions. Typical.

"Stiffs eat plain food," I say.

"Why?"

"Extravagance is considered self-indulgent and unnecessary," Tris recites.

"No wonder you left."

Tris rolls her eyes and shoots sarcastically back, "yeah, it was just because of the food." I try to hide my smile but feel one corner of my lips twitch upward. Tris is glancing my way and must notice, because she smiles slightly back. It's like there's just this… familiarity. She's too comfortable with me. Most people are intimidated by me, so I don't understand what's going on here. Maybe she's just not easily scared.

The doors to the cafeteria open and the room grows uncharacteristically quiet for Dauntless. I quickly see why: Eric. And he's making his way toward _me._ Great.

"Who's that?" Christina whispers.

I answer, "His name is Eric. He's a Dauntless leader."

Christina's eyebrows raise in surprise. "Seriously? But he's so young!"

"Age doesn't matter here," I say solemnly. _Connections to Jeanine Matthews do_.

And joy oh joy, it's my lucky day. Eric drops into the seat next to me. After a moment he says, "Well, Four? Aren't you going to introduce me?" _Nope, hadn't planned on it._ Tris tenses next to me. Can she sense the evil radiating off of him?

I sigh in annoyance. "Eric, this is Tris and Christina."

"Ooh, a Stiff." Eric smirks at her and I clench my teeth. I don't like how he's looking at her- like she's his next meal. "We'll see how long you last." I resist the urge to remind him that the last Stiff that transferred to Dauntless- me- knocked out one of Eric's teeth, and took first place in the rankings, leaving him as second. That would give away who I am and where I came from, though, so I don't. On the contrary; I silently pray that he doesn't make a comment revealing that I was a Stiff, too. And the truth is, he's right. When Eric and I were initiates, the fights weren't as brutal, and there was not a limit to how many initiates could become members. Small and weak as Tris is, it's very unlikely she'll make it through the first stage of training.

Tris's expression hardens. "You never know, I just might surprise you," she says. My eyes widen slightly- Eric is a scary looking person, especially coming from somewhere as conservative as Abnegation, but then again, she didn't seem even remotely intimidated by me, either. From what I've seen so far, what this girl lacks in body mass, she makes up for in spirit.

Eric's eyes narrow at her as his fingers tap the table, but he lets it go and turns his attention to me. "What have you been doing lately, Four?"

I shrug one shoulder. "Nothing, really." I just want him to leave already. Eric and I are not friends by any stretch of the imagination. I outranked him in our initiation, and even though I turned down the leadership position, leaving it to him, he's never gotten over it.

"Max tells me he keeps trying to meet with you and you don't show up. He requested that I find out what's going on with you."

Again? Isn't Max ever going to let it go? "Tell him," I say, "that I am satisfied with the position I currently hold."

"So he wants to give you a job."

"So it would seem."

"And you're not interested?"

I roll my eyes slightly. "I haven't been interested in two years."

"Well," Eric claps me hard on the shoulder- a gesture meant to appear friendly… but feel menacing. "Let's hope he gets the point then." Eric gets up and walks away, and I relax the tension I had been holding throughout my body.

Tris looks like she's trying to figure out how to say whatever it is she's thinking then she says, "so… are you two… friends?"

How do I answer this without answering it? "We were in the same initiate class. He transferred from Erudite." Being from Abnegation, I know she will be wary of the Erudite, so hopefully she will get the clue to stay far away from Eric.

"Were you a transfer, too?" Tris asks with a small smile.

I don't like to answer personal questions, and we are in a cafeteria full of people. She is much too comfortable with me- I have no idea why, but she is. I guess I'll be fixing that now. "I thought I would only have trouble with the Candor asking me too many questions," I say with the coldest tone I can muster. "Now I've got Stiffs, too?" I internally cringe and apologize for using a derogatory term like Stiffs. I have to play the part, though. No one knows where I came from, and that's the way I like it.

Tris looks at me with a hard expression. "It must be so because you're so approachable. You know, like a bed of nails." How did this girl come from Abnegation?! The Abnegation don't use sarcasm. At all. And yet in her first hour here, she's been sarcastic to me- _me,_ the guy everyone is always afraid of- twice already. I'm surprised she's even fluent in it at all.

I stare at her and she stares back, like she refuses to let me win. She's fascinating. So stubborn! And very brave; standing up for yourself is something you just don't do in Abnegation, but here she is.

"Careful, Tris," I say. Her kind of bravery is dangerous in Dauntless. She should be careful what she says, to me and to anyone else. It's when I say her name that it hits me. I know exactly who she is. Tris is short for Beatrice. She's Andrew Prior's Daughter.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

One thing I'm not particularly excited about with this whole second chance thing is spending another month or so living in the co-ed dorms. I'm even less excited about the co-ed bathrooms. I thought I was done with all that… and now I'm back to it. I'm more comfortable than I was when I arrived here the first time, at least, though.

I recall how hard it was to fall asleep here, at first. I had never slept in a room with other people before and was suddenly thrust into a situation where there were eight others breaking the silence with their breathing, beds squeaking as they tossed and turned, and worst of all, the crying. Only one initiate, though, is loudly and openly crying, and that is Al. After what happened to him, well, I suppose I've forgiven him… I know I had… but I didn't think I'd ever be put back into a situation where I'd see him again. How could I? He was dead. Yet, here I am. I'm really not sure how to feel about him or what to do over these next few weeks, in regards to him.

In the little bit of light coming through a crack in the doorway, now that my eyes have adjusted, I can see the face of my watch. It reads eleven twenty-five. I am to meet Uriah in five minutes. I quietly slip on my shoes- I am still in the habit of sleeping in my clothes- and tiptoe out of the dormitory. I wait just around the corner for about two minutes to be sure no one is following me, and no one comes. With Peter around, I can't be too careful.

Uriah is there waiting when I reach the chasm. "How was your double-serving of cake?" I ask him with a grin.

"Delicious, of course. You don't _really_ expect me to share that, do you?"

"I think you know better than to ask me that." I glance around one more time to make sure we are alone, and then down into the chasm where I know Tobias likes to sit and think. I don't see anyone anywhere. "Let's go somewhere not so out in the open," I suggest.

Uriah leads us into a little alcove nearby, away from any hallways. "Okay," he says. "So… what do we do? You're the brain here, Nose."

I roll my eyes. "Well, um... I don't know. I suppose we can't tell anyone what we know because no one would ever believe us. Four did tell me a few days before the attack happened on Abnegation, though, that something was happening and he just hadn't figured out what. Maybe we can come up with some believable story by then. And maybe we should start by brainstorming everything we know about the war- who our enemies are, who our allies are… when different things happened, and what led up to them, what the motives were. What information we would need to get Candor to arrest the people in charge of all this, maybe?"

Uriah nods. "There's going to be a lot to think about. One thing I did think of… Caleb." I huff in disgust and anger. Just like with Al, I may have forgiven Caleb before, but now I'm back in this situation where he's _going to_ betray me. It's no longer in the past. "He took information _you_ gave him to Jeanine. What if we feed him false information, if it does ever get to the point that he's involved?"

That's brilliant. "I thought you said I was the Nose here, Uriah? Sounds pretty smart to me."

Uriah grins proudly. I get the feeling that, cocky as he may be, 'smart' is not an adjective that he usually associates to himself. "How are we going to meet without people seeing us or hearing us? This is going to take some time. And this is initiation. We need to sleep, too."

I shake my head. "I really don't know. I guess maybe like every third or fourth night we could meet like we are tonight, then maybe at the end of each stage when we have a day off we can meet for longer." We're coming out of the alcove now. "How's Marlene?"

Uriah smiles sweetly. "I really missed her. It's… I don't have words for how good it is to have her back. You're going to help me keep her this time, right?"

I use my index finger to draw an X over my left breast. "Cross my heart and hope- well, I don't hope to die, but you know what I mean." After all we have been through, death is nothing to take lightly.

"How is it so far, seeing him?" Uriah looks serious and concerned.

I sigh. I have tried my best to keep Tobias off my mind but he never seems to go far from the forefront of my thoughts. "He just… he doesn't know me. And I _know_ him and I _love_ him. I'll just be glad when these first few weeks are over."

"He'll come around," Uriah assures me, pulling me into a hug. I rest my head on his chest and sigh as I hug back.

A familiar, deep, rumbling voice startles us both. "What are you two doing out here?" _Shit!_

"Oh, uh, Four! How's it going, man?" Uriah says nervously. Tobias arches one eyebrow. "Uh… I think I'll be getting back to my dorm and getting to bed. Night, Tris!" Wow… I didn't know Uriah could run that fast.

"I can see why you transferred, Tris. You sure don't act like you're from Abnegation. Guess you'll fit right in here with the Dauntless boys like Uriah," Four says so coldly I almost shiver. Immediately I feel a familiar pressure behind my eyes and pray that I can hold back the tears until I get back to the dormitory. It's the first day, I just 'met' Tobias a few hours ago, and I've already screwed things up!

"I'm not- we weren't-" I stutter, desperate for him to understand that there is nothing between me and Uriah. Tobias is mine and I am his and it's the only way it can be. He has to understand! But I have no idea how to explain it to him.

"I don't care who you mess around with, Tris, just get your ass back to the dorm."

I bite my quivering lip and try to stand strong, but I'm too crushed. His glare is so cold… I just want my Tobias back. As I turn away from him and walk back to the dormitory, I taste blood where I've chewed a hole in my lip and the tears begin to fall.

I can't believe I already messed up. What if I can't fix it?


	6. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER FIVE**

 _ **Tobias**_

Since dinner, the Abnegation transfer has nagged at the corners of my thoughts. I'm not sure why I can't keep her out of my mind. She's not what I would expect coming fresh out of Abnegation, but I suppose that's why she transferred. I can still see little hints of her upbringing- she is quiet; her words and actions are deliberate. I suppose it's that strange familiarity that I can't get off my mind. Maybe it's simply that she's Andrew Prior's daughter. He works closely with Marcus and they are good friends, though I can only assume that Andrew has no idea what a monster Marcus _really_ is.

I am approaching the Chasm, intending to follow the hidden trail down to the water. It's after midnight, and I expected the area near the railing that overlooks the Chasm to be deserted, but it isn't. There are two initiates in an intimate looking embrace. That initiates have wandered out of the dormitory at night- especially the first night, were they both transfers- does not shock me. Finding a Dauntless-born and a transfer together the first night is surprising. But most surprising is that not only is the Dauntless-born initiate my best friend's little brother, Uriah… the transfer is the Stiff, Tris.

My stomach twists. I don't know why it bothers me, and I push the unfamiliar pang of emotion out of my thoughts. This girl may have looked the picture perfect daughter of Abnegation when I would pass her on the streets years ago, but it's clear that somewhere along the way, that changed. Growing up in Abnegation, Tris should be wary of touch and a hug like the one Uriah is giving her, a hug so intimate and familiar, as if they've known each other for years, well… even had they known one another their whole lives, a hug like this would not be happening in Abnegation. This girl is clearly not what I was expecting. Not at all.

I push down my inexplicable disappointment, chalking it up to simple confusion at my inability to reconcile her behavior to her upbringing. The only explanation is that somehow she and Uriah have already hit it off. I use my 'Instructor Four' voice, as my friends call it. "What are you two doing down here?" I call out loudly, to be sure I'm heard over the roar of the Chasm.

Both initiates visibly jump, looking at me nervously… almost guiltily but not quite.

"Oh, uh, Four! How's it going, man?" Uriah looks scared shitless, like he thinks I'm going to punch him. "Uh… I think I'll be getting back to my dorm and getting to bed. Night, Tris!" He sprints away; I've never seen Uriah so nervous around me before, and it's weird. Everything about this is weird.

Tris stares at me with her jaw dropped. I keep my face blank, emotionless and intimidating. She's just an initiate, and she needs to know that I'm her instructor, that I'm an authority. I'm not her friend. "I can see why you transferred, Tris," I say coldly. "You sure don't act like you're from Abnegation. Guess you'll fit right in here with the Dauntless boys like Uriah."

Well, I think that did it. I could swear I see her actually shiver, and it gives me a slight sense of satisfaction. She's still frozen, still staring at me with her mouth hanging open. She begins to attempt an explanation that I didn't ask for and don't care to hear, apparently finally intimidated by me because she can't get the words out. "I'm not- we weren't-" Does she think I'm stupid? That wasn't a tentative hug with someone she barely knows. Why does she expect me to care who she dates or hooks up with, anyway?

I cut her off; I just want her to get out of here so I can push her out of my mind until I have to see the initiates tomorrow. "I don't care who you mess around with, Tris, just get your ass back to the dorm."

Her lip quivers. She's going to have to toughen up, because I won't coddle her. She bites her lip so hard that I'm surprised she didn't bite right through it and turns away from me, walking dejectedly away.

When I'm sure she's gone, I finally make my way down to the chasm. The rushing sound of the water calms me, helps clear my head, like white noise soothes a fussy infant. I try to keep the fiery little transfer from Abnegation out of my mind but she creeps back in.

For the two years since I transferred here, I have been the sole Abnegation-born member of Dauntless. Things are very different in Abnegation than they are here in Dauntless. My aversion to physical contact most certainly stems from my childhood there. No one here 'gets' me. Maybe in the back of my mind, I thought that Tris would, simply because she was raised there as well. From what I saw tonight, though, she's much more Dauntless than I had bargained for. Much more like the girls here who I have no interest in. It's just as well. I'll be leaving Dauntless to join my mother in the Factionless once I figure out what it is Max is up to with Jeanine. If this is who Tris is, then there's one less thing to hold me back.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

"The first thing you will learn today is how to shoot a gun," Tobias says. "The second is how to win a fight." Tobias is walking down the line of nine initiates handing us each a gun. As he presses one into my palm, he doesn't even look at me. I frown, looking at my shoes. I _know_ in my mind that he doesn't know me, he doesn't remember the things I remember, he doesn't understand that Uriah and I are good friends... but my heart still hurts at his regarding me so coldly, and my head pounds slightly in the aftermath of last night's tears. "Thankfully, if you are here, you already know how to get on and off a moving train, so I don't need to teach you that."

I examine the gun, just for the distraction from my hurt feelings, as he continues. "Initiation is divided into three stages. We will measure your progress and rank you according to your performance in each stage. The stages are not weighed equally in determining your final rank, so it is possible, though difficult, to drastically improve your rank over time."

I remember the first time I held a gun. It was in this exact same situation, it's just I'm the only one who remembers it. It felt so foreign in my hands, so dangerous, as if I could hurt someone just by possessing it. I'm not really afraid to _hold_ the gun now, but I am really wishing I had thought not to stand next to Will. The gun in my hand with Will standing only a few feet away… my heart is pounding in my ears. This time, I really _do_ know just how dangerous the hunk of metal in my hands is.

"We believe," Tobias continues, "that preparation eradicates cowardice, which we define as the failure to act in the midst of fear." Words Tobias said to me in a different time echo in my head. ' _Becoming fearless isn't the point. That's impossible. It's learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it. That's the point.'_ I can do this.

"Therefore each stage of initiation is intended to prepare you in a different way. The first stage is primarily physical; the second, primarily emotional; the third, primarily mental."

Peter pipes up with his idiotic comment, and I smirk as soon as he begins to speak, remembering what Tobias is about to do. "But what…" Peter yawns. "What does firing a gun have to do with...bravery?"

As Tobias flips the gun in his hand, puts the barrel against Peter's forehead and clicks the bullet into place, my body shakes in silent laughter. This is one of the few things that could amuse me after the misunderstanding last night. Peter freezes mid-yawn. Will looks at me in shock at my reaction.

"Wake. Up." Tobias barks. "You are holding a loaded gun, you idiot. Act like it." When Tobias puts the gun down, away from Peter's head, Peter turns bright red and his body straightens. "And to answer your question, you are far less likely to soil your pants and cry for your mother if you are prepared to defend yourself."

Tobias tells us to watch before he gets into stance, feet shoulder width apart, wraps both hands around the gun, and fires. I watch, not to see what to do because I remember how to fire a gun, I've certainly done enough of that by now. No, this time, I'm just admiring him. As others start to fire, I'm still staring at Tobias.

"Is there a problem, initiate?" Tobias's question brings me back to reality. Oops, I guess I got a little caught up admiring how gorgeous he is…

"Uh, no, sorry Four," I mumble. Feet shoulder width apart, I hold the gun firmly in both hands. I remember how the recoil sent me into the wall the first time I did this, and I know my body is not yet strong. I brace myself and fire. An image of Will, his eyes blank, a bullet speeding into his skull flashes in my mind. I close my eyes and breathe in and out through my nose until my breathing slows again.

When I open my eyes, Tobias is staring at me, his brow furrowed. "Uh, it's nothing," I say quickly. "Just… a bad dream I had. I'll get past it." It's true enough. I have relived the moment Will died many times in my sleep.

 _My_ Tobias would have known why I was struggling.

I look to see whether I hit the target. I'm surprised to see that while I didn't make the bullseye, I did hit the inner circle.

"Excellent first shot, initiate," is all Tobias says before he moves on.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

It's my first day of training as a Dauntless initiate, and I'm more nervous than I would ever admit. We've started with training on the punching bags. Lauren quickly demonstrated a few punches and kicks, then we were expected to jump right in and get to it. Us Dauntless-borns have been doing this stuff for fun to at least some extent practically our whole lives, I can't even imagine how nervous I'd be if I were a transfer. Especially if I were scrawny like that Stiff Uriah seems so impressed with. It's really weird, and I'd be lying if I didn't admit I was a little jealous. Not that I have any claim to him, much as I wish I did.

I practice punches and kicks but the bag isn't moving as much as I had hoped it would. I wish I had practiced this a bit more before initiation began. Lynn was in here all the time, and her bag is swinging pretty hard. I glance at Uriah on the bag next to me, admiring his form. He looks so confident. I wish I felt as sure of myself. But I'll pretend to. Fake it till you make it, right?

"Mar!" Uriah calls out. I stop and look at him, dropping my hands. He comes around behind me and reaches both arms around me, then positions my arms and fixes my fists. Huh, I see the difference between what I had been doing and how he has positioned me. With a hand gripping each of my wrists, he slowly moves my arms as he explains what we're doing. "Start with your arm in this position, and when you extend it, twist like this. If you need more power you can use your knees and elbows, too." I try it a few times and the bag moves more than before. "Awesome, you got it," he says with a grin- he has the cutest damn grin- then returns to his bag.

I try to concentrate on my training but now Uriah has taken off his shirt and it's hard to tear my eyes away.

Training. I'm here for training. If I don't focus, then I'm going to get my ass handed to me on a platter tomorrow when we start the fights. I shake my head to clear it and focus on my punches and kicks. Lauren walks by after a while and nods in approval; I respond with a satisfied smile. I am so engrossed in training that it feels like no time before Lauren dismisses us for lunch.

"You were lookin' good there, Mar," Uriah says with the cutest freaking smirk I've ever seen. "Fights tomorrow, right? You wanna spar a little tonight, make sure we're ready?" Physical contact with you? _Yes please!_

We enter the dining hall and fill our plates. Uriah walks ahead and Lynn and I follow… to the table with the transfers? _Ugh._ What is with Uriah and befriending the transfers?

"Tris! Christina!" he calls out, and his eyes light up. There's that pang of jealousy again. I sigh. "We're gonna spar tonight. Make sure we're ready for tomorrow's fights. You two wanna join?"

Tris shrugs and picks at her food. I look to Uriah he is frowning, looking at Christina, questioning her with his eyes. She looks at Tris and back at Uriah, shrugging, as if answering, 'I don't have a clue what's wrong with her.'

"Tris," Uriah says gently, rounding to her side of the table. He crouches down so he's looking up at her. As I put down my tray and sit, Uriah and Tris are talking to one another, but their voices are too soft for me to make out. Probably means it's a private conversation and I shouldn't try to listen, anyway.

My heart drops to my stomach as Uriah leads Tris away from the table and out of the cafeteria, a couple of sandwiches in his other hand. "What's going on with those two?" I wonder aloud when they're out of sight.

"It's weird, right?" Lynn says. "Uriah's easy to become friends with and all, but didn't they just meet yesterday?"

Christina frowns and shrugs. "I guess they must have some crazy connection or something," she says. "When I met Tris on the train I thought she and I would be great friends, but it looks like she's already found her bestie here." I thought Uriah was _my_ 'bestie'. Well, him and Lynn both, but still. And I'd hoped that maybe… maybe soon we could be more. But if he has this crazy connection with this random transfer girl… well, now I'm not so sure.

I sigh aloud before I catch myself and Lynn shoots me a look, as if asking what's wrong. I shrug and fake a smile.

At least I get to eat my cake today.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

The initiates file in after lunch, and my eyes follow Tris. Her lips turn down into a deep frown, and her eyes look slightly swollen, as if she has been crying. _Probably boy trouble, judging from what I saw last night_ , I think with a slight roll of my eyes.

I shake it off, and a moment later, I realize she has drawn me in yet again. Now she's chatting a little with Will and Christina, and Al joins them. He watches her every move, looking at her with adoration. So she's going to be one of _those_ kind of girls. I guess when she left her old faction behind she committed to her decision with Dauntless abandon.

Time to get started training the initiates to fight. "As I said this morning," I begin, "next you will learn how to fight. The purpose of this is to prepare you to act; to prepare your body to respond to threats and challenges- which you will need, if you intend to survive life as a Dauntless. We will go over technique today, and tomorrow you will start to fight each other. So I recommend that you pay attention. Those who don't learn fast _will_ get hurt." Yet again, my eyes settle on Tris. Not because she isn't paying attention- she is- but she's just so small and fragile, she's going to have to work extra hard if she's going to make it through stage one.

I demonstrate several kicks and punches, then the initiates begin to practice on the punching bags that are hung at three foot intervals along one side of the room. I pace along the aisle of initiates, watching their stances, how they hold their arms, the rotation of their fist as they punch, and so on. First is Peter. He's powerful, but not so big as to be slow. He doesn't need much help from me so if he wants it, he can ask for it. Next to him is Drew. Drew is stocky, fairly strong. I correct his stance and the position of his arms, but as soon as I move on to Molly, I notice when I glance back that he has already reverted back to what he was doing before. Oh well, not my problem. If he isn't going to listen, he'll suffer the consequences.

Molly keeps her left arm too high. If her opponents are smart, they'll notice and take advantage of that. She also doesn't move her feet. At all. She's about as responsive to my instruction as Drew was. I get the feeling that those two aren't the brightest bulbs in the box.

Next is Edward. His technique is excellent. I walk past him to his girlfriend Myra, who honestly may be beyond help, but I do my best.

After Myra is Al. That kid is a sledgehammer- all brute force, but no finesse. For the fights, that will do, though, against most opponents, because the kid is huge. I give him a few tips and move on to Will. Will was born Erudite and quickly picks up each tip I give him, fixing his stance, arm position, and so on. It's refreshing after wasting my time trying to help Drew and Molly.

Next I come to the one that hasn't seemed to be far from the center of my mind since she landed in the net in a gray blur: Tris. I stand back and watch her. Her stance is nearly perfect, and her technique is surprisingly good. She just is completely lacking in muscle. It's like she's trained before, but she couldn't have. There would be no one to train her in Abnegation, and if she had trained, she would be stronger than she is.

She glances at me nervously. "You don't have much muscle," I say. She bites her lip. "...which means that you're better off using your knees and elbows. You can put more power behind them." She nods matter of factly and a look of determination settles on her face. She's stubborn and she's not going to go down without a fight.

I don't know why I do it- growing up in Abnegation, physical touch was very much discouraged, and no one ever really touched me unless it was to hurt me. Yet, I find myself placing my hand on her stomach. She's so small that with the heel of my hand resting on her side, my fingertips pass the opposite ribcage. She holds her breath, and the look on her face confuses me- a mix of relief, longing and sadness. I clear my throat. "Never forget to keep tension here." When I take my hand away and move on to Christina, shaking my head to clear it, I hear her slowly exhale. When I glance back, she's working the bag with her knees and elbows, causing it to swing twice as much as before.

Why am I so fascinated by her? I don't like the way that she won't stay out of my thoughts, I don't like the unnerving feeling I get when she looks into my eyes, as if I'm standing before her completely naked. And for some reason, I don't like that she is already so friendly with Uriah. This is going to be a long few weeks.


	7. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER SIX**

 _ **Uriah**_

I easily block Marlene's punch, grabbing her wrist and twisting it behind her back. Sweeping her feet out from under her, I pin her for the tenth time tonight. She's pinned me a couple of times, and she's really not terrible at fighting… I just happen to be the best out of the Dauntless-born initiates, at least I was the first time I went through initiation.

I keep hoping that Tris come by- I'd love for her to spar with Marlene, I think they'd both get a lot out of it. It would be a more even match than me against either of them. "Who are you looking for?" Marlene asks as she sits up.

"Oh, I just thought Tris and Christina might come give us a couple more opponents to face off with," I say with a shrug. She frowns slightly. I'm not sure why she doesn't seem to like Tris- she liked her before, the first time. They didn't meet till Capture the Flag last time, but I don't see why that should matter. Tris is way more, well… _Tris,_ than she was at the beginning of our first time through initiation.

"You know, I'm getting tired, Uri," Marlene says, looking away from me. "I think maybe I should get some rest, maybe that's the best thing to prepare me for tomorrow."

Oh. I had been hoping to hang out with her a little more. I guess if she's tired… she seems 'off', though. "Uh… okay, Marlene." I fake a smile. She turns and begins to leave, but I can't just let her go looking all sad like that. I quickly take the few steps to close the distance between us, and touch my hand to her shoulder. She pauses and looks over her shoulder at me. "Are you okay? You seem kind of down or something."

Marlene smiles but it doesn't quite reach her eyes. I know it's fake. "Totally fine! Just tired. I'll see ya later, Uriah." I frown as I watch her walk away, not missing way her shoulders slump. As the training room closes behind her, I let out a sigh and rub my hands over my face. I feel like something isn't right. Something isn't how it should be.

* * *

I can't seem to shake the uneasy feeling I got in the training room earlier. It's nearly lights out time at the dormitory, but I won't be able to sleep when I'm feeling anxious like this, so I decide to look for Zeke. He isn't hard to find: he has a night shift in the control room.

"Baby bro! Shouldn't you be getting some sleep before your first fight?" Zeke says with his usual grin stretched across his face.

"Probably should," I answer, "but I don't think I'd be able to sleep right now so I came to talk to you."

Zeke frowns. "Everything alright?"

I shrug. "Girl trouble, I guess," I say as I sit in one of the empty chairs and lean forward, resting my forearms on my knees.

Zeke smirks. "Trouble in paradise? The Stiff, right?"

My head snaps up quickly- Tris? Why would he think I liked Tris? "The Stiff, you mean Tris? No, not Tris," I say shaking my head. "Marlene."

Zeke raises his eyebrows dramatically as he finishes typing a command in on the keyboard, then leans back in his chair, supporting his head with both hands behind it. "Marlene, huh?" he says. "I had noticed you spending so much time with that transfer- Tris, was it?" I nod. "-and you and Mar have been friends for so long. I didn't realize you liked her. So, what's the problem?"

I sigh, shaking my head. "I don't know. She just seems… distant or something. I thought maybe she liked me too, but I feel now like she's pulling away from me."

"Are you sure there's nothing between you and Tris?" Zeke asks. "Seems like _she_ likes _you,_ at least."

Why is he so obsessed with this idea of me and Tris? Never gonna happen. Ever. She's cute and awesome and all, but she's in love with Four, I'm in love with Marlene, and even if they were gone, Tris is more like my sister to me, not a romantic interest. That's just wrong.

"There is _nothing there,_ Zeke. _Nothing._ Just friends. And that goes for her feelings for me, too. I'm positive. We have this… connection… I can't explain it to you." Well, I could, but then he'd be seriously concerned for my mental health. "It's nothing more than a friendship, and I know for sure that she feels the same way."

Zeke silently watches the screens for a few minutes, but he's rubbing his chin like he does when he's thinking.

"I'd tell you to ask Marlene to hang out, but you already hang out all the time," Zeke says. "Shauna and I were good friends first, too, as you know. When we got together… I don't know, it just kind of… happened. I didn't even totally realize how I felt about her until we got drunk one night and… things happened."

I grin. "So what you're saying is that I should get her drunk?"

Zeke snorts out a laugh. "I don't know, man. Maybe. Liquid courage, kiss her, hope it doesn't ruin your friendship."

Ruining our friendship is the last thing I'd want to do. I don't know why this is so hard. We were in love before… I know how she felt about me then… but that was after initiation was over. We had… been through stuff together. I don't know if she felt that way about me this early on. I don't know what it was that led to her feeling more for me, or when it happened. I sure don't want to mess it up.

"I should go to bed," I say, standing up, still feeling no more sure of what to do about Marlene than I did when I walked in here. "Thanks for listening."

Zeke stands and claps me on the shoulder. "Anytime, baby bro."

As I leave, I stop, turning so half my body is hidden by the door, holding it partially open with one hand. "And Zeke?" He hums in response, eyes on the screens. "Don't tell anyone, okay? Promise?"

He looks me in the eyes as he answers. "I promise." Then he adds, "only Shauna. Shauna and I don't keep secrets. But she won't tell." I nod and thank him as I leave, hoping that I won't be kept up all night thinking about Marlene.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

I told Uriah that I wanted to get some rest when I left the training room, but when I get to the dormitory, I know won't be able to sleep anytime soon. It's early enough that no one is even in here yet, so I wander the halls, thinking about Uriah and Tris.

I could talk to Lynn about all this, but I don't know… I'm not sure why, maybe just because the three of us are such close friends, but I would feel weird talking to her about Uriah. Besides, she doesn't warm up to people easily and that might totally turn her against Tris. If Uriah and Tris do end up dating- even if they just are good friends- that could cause a lot of awkwardness and then everything would be so messed up. If nothing ever happens with Uriah and me, I would hate to lose his friendship.

Without thinking about where I'm going, I end up standing in front of a familiar door. With a shrug, I knock. I only have to wait about ten seconds before the door opens. Shauna smiles as she greets me. "Mar! Come in!"

I try to smile, but I know I won't fool Shauna. Shauna is Lynn's sister- older than us by two years- so we grew up together. I'm an only child, and Shauna is the closest thing I have to a sister. She furrows her eyebrows and frowns. "Why don't you sit down and I will get us something to drink, then we can talk. I'm guessing that's why you're here…" I just nod and fall back onto her couch. Shauna returns with two bottles of water and hands me one as she sits next to me. "So, why the sad face?" Leave it to Shauna to get right to the point.

"Boy trouble," I say, as if that will explain everything and I won't have to verbalize all the details. She stares at me blankly and I know she's waiting for me to elaborate. "Look, you have to promise not to tell anyone, okay?" She nods. "You swear?"

Shauna half-jokingly puts one hand over her heart, like she's reciting a pledge. "I promise you my silence. Now, spill it."

I hide my face behind my hands. "I like Uriah," I groan. My hands are still covering my face.

"I'm sorry, I didn't get that," Shauna says earnestly.

I drop my hands and let out a huff, looking away from her. "I have feelings for Uriah."

My friend just looks confused. "Well… why is that a bad thing?! You two are perfect for each other! You're probably one of the few that could handle life with a Pedrad brother," she jokes.

"The problem," I say, irritated, "is that damn Stiff! I thought that maybe he felt the same way I do, but then _she_ came along and he seems completely smitten with her." _Did I just use the word 'smitten'?_

Shauna's face falls, and she nods slowly. "I guess I _have_ seen him with her quite a bit since the transfers came yesterday. I thought it was kind of odd. What was her name, again?"

"Tris," I hiss. And then I just feel bad, because she actually seems really nice. She doesn't deserve the attitude I have toward her but I just don't know how to help it.

"Tris," Shauna repeats. "Well, maybe it's just because she's new. It might blow over. Does she like him?"

I shrug. How would I know? I've barely said two words to her. "I don't know. Seems like it. I was so excited before lunch when he asked me to spar with him tonight, then as soon as we got to the dining hall he made a bee-line for the table _she_ was at and asked her and her friend to come, too. They didn't show, but he was all distracted after a while, watching for her. I even asked and he said he had thought maybe Tris and Christina would show up and that's what had him distracted."

Shauna sighs. "That's the worst," she says. "Liking someone, and they're interested in someone else. I went through that with Zeke for a long time before he finally got his head out of his ass. But I really think... there was no rushing it. I think you should wait it out and just focus on initiation for now. Let the novelty of the new kids wear off. You two have history."

I nod slowly, looking down at the half-full water bottle in my hands. Shauna wraps her arms around me, mumbling reassurances that everything would be fine, and I rest my head on her shoulder, staying that way until I get tired and head back to the dorm.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

"Since there are an odd number of you, one of you will be sitting out today," Four explains as he gestures to the chalkboard. Like last time, Eric is here. Just his presence in the room makes my stomach clench, and I have to suppress a shiver every time he glances my way. I never liked him, but now I know what he is capable of, what he is up to, and who he is working with.

Will and Al fight first again. I watch the same argument, word-for-word, between Eric and Tobias about whether it's more brave to never surrender or to acknowledge others' strengths, watch the same stare-down, and once again watch Tobias concede to our cruel young leader. Again, I watch Al knock Will out and stand over him concerned before Tobias takes Will to the infirmary, leaving us alone with Eric. Again I have the thought that it's like leaving us with a babysitter who spends the whole time sharpening knives, and almost laugh at how predictable my own thoughts are.

Molly and Christina are up next. Their fight is a carbon copy of the one in my memory, and I cringe when Christina calls out, blood streaming from her nose. "Stop! Stop! I'm done," she chokes out. "I'm done."

"I'm sorry," Eric says, stalking over to her. I know the dangerous look in his eyes, certainly know it better than anyone else in this room, and I know what is going to happen. "Did you say you were done?"

"Y-yes," Christina heaves.

"Alright," Eric says, feigning the empathy I am quite sure he is not capable of, holding out his hand to help her up. After pulling her up, he puts one hand on Christina's back. "Come with me." He motions to all of us to follow, and we do.

I can't watch her hang like that again. I just can't. I care too much for Christina and I am not the scared little _Stiff_ I was the first time this went down. I am Tris. I am Dauntless. I am brave.

I push through the crowd until I'm walking side by side with Eric. I wish Tobias hadn't left the room. "Eric, can I talk to you alone for a second?" I ask. I know this is a bad idea. I know it. I can't help myself, though. I can't watch Christina dangle over the Chasm again.

Eric glares at me, and it only strengthens my resolve. Eric is a bully, and the best way to deal with a bully is to stand up to them. Okay, that may not be entirely true when said bully is a leader of Dauntless, but I guess there's a reason I'm here and not at Erudite.

We're several yards ahead of the rest of the transfers, and I talk quietly while we walk. "I know what you're going to do. Please, don't make her hang there. She could fall. She could die. There has to be a different way to handle this."

Eric narrows his eyes at me, and I can see the anger in them at my insubordination. "How do you propose I handle it, then? Would you like to do it for her?" He says the words in a clipped, overly-enunciated fashion that gives me chills, but I refuse to let him scare me into backing down. I stand straighter and set my jaw.

"If necessary," I reply, "yes, I'd take her place." I hope that my determination is enough to make up for how weak my arms still are. We're almost to the Chasm now and I don't have an answer from him.

We stop in front of the Chasm, and he stares me in the eyes for a moment, like he's reading me, judging whether I'm brave enough to do it. I stand straight, head held high, my arms crossed in front of my chest. Finally he speaks. "Nice try, Stiff, and points for bravery, but I do actually have a lesson to teach Candor here," he says quietly.

Eric turns to the group of initiates. "You all are training to be soldiers. The enemy won't give up, and if you are going to give up as easily as Candor here did, you are useless to Dauntless." I really would have respected this whole 'lesson' a lot more if he had explained it the first time he made her do this. I still think it's wrong, but at least I know he has _some_ reason for it. He turns to Christina. "You will hang off that railing over the Chasm for five minutes. If you succeed, I will forgive your cowardice. If you refuse or you come up before the five minutes are up, you can go join the factionless. If you fall, well… don't. I don't want the paperwork," he says callously.

I swallow, hard. I tried to stop Eric from making her do this, and I failed. She will make it. She did before. Good thing, because I know there is no point in further challenging Eric. "You can do it, Chris. I know you can. Just don't give up," I say to her softly, and she shakily walks to the railing and steps over it.

I don't look, other than periodic glances. I've watched this happen once and I cannot watch it again. Everything happens just the same as it did- Al keeping time, cheering on Christina; I begin cheering much sooner this time, shooting glares at Eric the whole time. But the thing that is different this time is Eric. Before, he just looked bored. But this time… this time, every time I glance his way, he is staring at _me._ And he doesn't even look angry. He's just watching me, with that curious look of an Erudite who is trying to figure something out. Caleb gets that look, so I know it well.

After the five minutes are up and Al helps Christina over the railing, I help her calm down. "Back to training, initiates," Eric calls out, and we walk back to the training room with my arm around Christina's waist as she continues to sniffle.

By the time training is over, I have analyzed every initiate for weaknesses and feel prepared for the fights that are to come. I'm pleased to see Tobias glance at me frequently, sometimes outright staring, but I can't get the knots out of my stomach and it's not because of Tobias. It's because every time I look at Eric, he is also looking at me.

* * *

The next day, we fight again. For everyone else this is their second fight, but it's my first. I'm shocked when I enter, however, to find that the pairings have changed from what they were on this day the first time I went through initiation. I'm not up against Peter this time. Instead, I am fighting Christina.

I'm really not sure to make of this. Christina is certainly a much easier opponent than Peter, and I'm fairly certain that Eric made the pairings- I don't think Tobias would have put me with Peter for my first fight ever. On the other hand, Christina is also my best friend… and I stood up for her yesterday. So, did Eric do this as a reward, or a punishment? Either way I have to fight her… I just wish I knew what kind of attention it meant I should expect from Eric. I'd rather not have his attention at all, but I brought it on myself when I pulled him aside yesterday, I suppose.

Peter and Drew fight each other first. The fight is pretty quick- Peter is a formidable opponent, and Drew is strong enough, but not very smart or fast. Tobias orders Peter to carry Drew to the infirmary, probably not wanting to leave us alone with Eric again after yesterday.

Next Will is to fight Myra, and I feel sorry for her. She's the worst fighter and weakest out of the bunch, and Will isn't one of the best, but he's really not bad, either. I think I remember him ranking third in this stage the first time around. The fight is over quickly; Will has Myra out in one punch, and I'm grateful that it's so quick and painless.

Now, though, it is time for me to fight my best friend. "Best friends?" I say as we walk to the ring. "Even if one of us does have to knock the other out?"

Christina grins. "I promise not to get mad at you if you promise not to be mad at me." I'm sure she doesn't think it's possible for me to beat her, but I refuse to count myself out that quickly. My body may still be pretty weak, but I do know how to fight now. There's more to winning a fight than physical strength.

We circle one another and I quickly assess Christina for weaknesses one more time. She's taller than me, but she isn't a large person by any means- she's still slender, willowy. She's pretty quick, and she can throw a good punch. I notice her placing too much weight on one foot as well as not blocking well enough as she leans into it to punch, and I quickly dodge her, elbowing her in the stomach. She staggers back, her face showing clear surprise, and comes toward me again. I fall for a fake left hook and she punches me in the jaw. She quickly goes for a punch to my stomach as I dodge around her, kicking at her knees and knocking her feet out from under her. I back away, letting her get up, glancing quickly at Tobias and Eric.

Eric isn't tapping his foot impatiently like when I fought Peter; he and Tobias both seem to have their full attention on the fight. Eric is watching me with curiosity and Tobias's face is impassive, but in his eyes I swear I see pride. I'm too busy with the fight, though, to spend much time wondering why.

Christina is up and charging my way, but her surprise that she had so grossly underestimated me has affected her focus. As she goes to punch, she's not balancing her weight right and there's no way she can right herself quickly enough when I have faked one direction and instead dodge the other way, kneeing her in the stomach. She doubles over and I elbow her in the throat, sweep her legs out from under her, and pin her to the mat, not letting her up this time. With a swift punch to the temple, she's out and I have this time triumphed in my first fight, coming out with only a bruised jaw. Tobias circles my name on the board.

I bend over Christina and Tobias approaches with an ammonia stick, hoping that she's in good enough shape to avoid a trip to the infirmary. She comes to quickly and I help her out of the ring so the final pair, Molly and Edward. Al sits out today.

Edward, I recall, has been studying hand-to-hand combat for fun since he was ten years old, so this fight goes just as I would expect. I would have been ashamed at the satisfaction I get out of seeing Molly beaten the first time I went through initiation, but this time, I don't. I know what she is like. She deserves it.

While they are fighting, I lean in to Christina, who sits beside me with her back against the wall. "You okay?"

Christina chuckles. "Yeah, I am. I gotta say, though, I didn't think you had all that in you, Tris," she admits.

"Good things come in small packages," I say with a grin, and she laughs. I am relieved that she doesn't seem to be upset with me.

After the final fight is over, we are dismissed and I begin to leave with my friends… but Eric calls out to me. "Tris, you stay," Eric barks at me, as if he's commanding a dog. Will raises his eyebrows at me, silently asking if I'll be okay. I fake a smile and shrug before turning back to Eric as the room clears.

"Yes, Eric? You needed to talk to me?" I say nervously. This never happened before. There was that time he said he should keep his eye on me after the knife throwing, but he never once asked me to stay behind, alone with him, like this. Tobias isn't here- did Eric ask him to leave?

"You did very well today, Stiff," Eric says and I scowl.

"My name is Tris," I say flatly.

Eric smirks. "Right. Tris." He steps closer to me, until we're less than a foot apart. I really do not like being this close to him. Every time he has been this close to me it's felt menacing… probably because nearly every time, it has been, like when I shot his foot during the Abnegation attack, or when he was hunting Divergents in Candor and Tobias saved me just in time. "Where did you learn to fight like that?" he asks me, tucking a stray hair behind my ear. This is just creepy.

"Um…" I stammer, "I just… I just you know… did the training the other day… Four gave me good tips. I pay attention. And I watch for my opponent's weaknesses."

"You are a fast learner." Eric has _never_ talked to me in this soft tone of voice before. Not just volume soft but it's more than that. I don't know what's happening here. "And you're brave." He tucks a strand of hair behind the other ear now. "But you are rebellious. We are training soldiers here, not rebels. What should I do with you after your insubordination at the Chasm yesterday, hmmm?"

My heart is pounding. He makes me so nervous. Not the good kind of nervous like I always have been with Tobias. "I thought that was why you paired me with her for the fight today," I say. "I had to beat up my best friend."

Eric barks out a loud laugh. "Yes, well, she barely touched you. So that didn't work out quite like I had hoped." He is even closer to me now, and has backed me up against the wall. He runs a finger slowly along the bruise on my jaw from when Christina managed to land a punch.

Abruptly, Eric pulls back. "I've got my eye on you… Tris." He leaves the training room, the door slamming behind him, leaving me stood against the wall with my heart pounding.


	8. Chapter 7

_Hey everyone! I just wanted to say that I appreciate the reviews SO much! It's such great motivation to continue writing and I'm always excited to read them. Also thank you again FourTrisHEA for all your help talking through my story with me and helping brainstorm and giving feedback. If you haven't checked out her story, Disremembered, you should go look for it- I'm really enjoying it!_

 **CHAPTER SEVEN**

 _ **Uriah**_

It's while I'm looking for Marlene, hoping she will hang out with me tonight, that I check the training room and see Tris sitting against a wall. She's curled up in a ball, her arms around her shins and her head resting on her knees.

"Tris?" I sit down right next to her and wrap an arm around her hunched shoulders. "What's wrong? Did something happen with Four?" She shakes her head but doesn't look up for a moment. She turns her head to face me, one cheek still resting on her knees.

"I screwed something up, I think," she says. "I tried to get Eric not to hang Christina over the chasm yesterday. Stood up for her. Now… now I think maybe… it seems like he's… _interested_ in me." Oh, gross. I'd be upset if I were in her shoes, too. "And I just feel like I'm messing up all the things that are supposed to happen, and what if Four never falls in love with me now?"

Four not falling for Tris seems impossible to me, but … she isn't the same as she was when they fell in love before. Back then, she was a little girl from Abnegation just beginning to come out of her shell. This time, she's been through so much. She has ranked first in initiation, almost died a good half dozen times, fought a war, been tortured and experimented on by Jeanine Matthews, and watched her parents die. She has killed people and learned to live with it, been betrayed by her own brother and still forgiven and died for him. And she is in love with Four. Even just that would make a difference.

No, she isn't the little girl from Abnegation that he fell in love with before. Tris is truly Dauntless now.

What about me? Am I the same person I was when Marlene and I fell in love before? Probably not. Like Tris, I've been through too much. I have been through a war, I have killed, I have fallen in love… I've lost the girl I love and my two best friends. I've even been outside the wall, and I have looked down at the world from high above it, like the birds. You can't go through all that and not come out changed.

I sigh. "What did we do the first time?" I ask. "What were we like then? Maybe that's how we need to be now. The old Uriah and Tris, not the ones we are now."

"And then what?" she asks. "That feels like tricking them. I can't have him fall in love with me pretending to be someone else, then suddenly become who I am now one day. That isn't fair to him. Same goes for you and Marlene." Tris lets out a deep sigh and rubs her face with both hands, then looks up at me again. "Do you think it's too late to back off from our friendship some? It seems like maybe people think we are a thing. What if Four and Marlene think that?" I nod. It's going to be hard going through all this without talking to Tris about all of it all the time. She's one of my best friends and the only one that understands what this is like.

"We can still be friends though, right? Just not look like we're as close as we have been?" I ask. She smiles and nods. "Okay, that's settled. Now what are we going to do about Eric?"

Tris shakes her head, then leans it against my shoulder. "I really don't know."

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

It's been two days since my talk with Shauna. Both yesterday and today, I have had to fight during training; I lost the first fight, which was against a boy named Ryker who is much bigger than me and put me in the infirmary for several hours with a minor concussion. In the second fight, which was this morning, I beat Rita, so I am feeling pretty good today. I've worked up the courage… I think, at least… to talk to Uriah.

That is, until I check the training room in my search for him. I look through the small pane of glass near the top of the door and there he is. Uriah is sitting against the wall with his arm around that Stiff, Tris. Her head is resting on his shoulder. My stomach twists as I back away from the door and every ounce of that courage I told myself I had worked up has suddenly disappeared. I just need to go somewhere… away from here. I need to sit and think. Alone.

When I get up to the roof, however, it seems alone isn't in the cards today. One of the transfers- a blond boy, Erudite I think- lies on the rooftop, staring up at the clouds. It's nearing dusk and it was a nice day today. The clouds must have been white and fluffy; the sunset reflects off of them, making them look pink and orange.

I should just find somewhere else. I have no idea where else to go, though. Dauntless isn't always the easiest place to keep to yourself in. With a sigh, I sit down next to the transfer. His hair is wavy and that super light blonde, the kind that would almost be white if it were any lighter. He's tall, strong. He has a strong jawline and a straight nose. Really, this boy is pretty handsome.

The boy sits up next to me. "Hey," I say, and I smile at him. "Sorry, I'm not sure I ever got your name."

"Edward," he says, smiling back and holding out his hand.

I accept his handshake. "Marlene." After a few minutes of awkward silence, I remember he's usually with that girl with the mousy brown hair. "Where's your girlfriend? I'm not sure I ever got her name, either."

"Myra. She's in the infirmary. She wasn't exactly prepared for the challenges of Dauntless initiation," he says. "She came here to be with me, but I have a feeling she would have stayed in Erudite if we had known about the cuts."

I cringe. That had to be a very unpleasant surprise for her. "That bad, huh?"

He nods. "I'm sure she's ranked last, so far. When we got here I thought at least she wouldn't be last with the Stiff around, but apparently looks can be deceiving," he chuckles. Ugh, really? Tris not only has Uriah wrapped around her finger, but she doesn't even suck at fighting? I scowl. I don't want to talk about her. I'm trying to get my mind _off_ that subject. "Anyway," he continues, "I've tried to help Myra. I've won all mine so far, I've been studying hand-to-hand combat in my spare time since lower levels. But she's not getting it. At all."

At least I don't have to worry that Uriah will be cut, like Edward does about Myra. "So if she gets cut, what will that mean for you? Will you follow her?"

"To the factionless?" Edward huffs, and looks down at his shoes. "I don't know. I really don't want to be factionless. But she came here to be with me, so I feel bad about the idea of letting her go on her own." He shrugs. "I don't think I can give up the entire rest of my life for her."

For a while, neither of us says anything. It's not awkward, though. It's a comfortable silence. It's nice, really. Quiet is hard to come by at the Dauntless compound.

I don't know how long we've been sitting there, just quietly keeping each other company, when Edward breaks the silence. "I had better go check on her, see if she can leave the infirmary yet. Nice talking to you, Marlene," he says with a very charming smile, and he touches my shoulder with one hand.

Before I look back at the setting sun, I watch Edward walk away and jump off the ledge, into the hole with the net at the bottom.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

The field trip to the fence is one of my least favorite days of training the new initiates. It involves a train ride to the fence that surrounds the City, telling them basically about how if they don't place near the top at the end of initiation they'll be working there, which is a rather undesirable career to get stuck with, hang around there for a little while, then ride the train back with them.

It doesn't _sound_ so bad. Unfortunately, when you ride the train all the way to Amity with nine initiates from three different factions- especially with no other members to distract you from the transfers' bickering- it's a rather tedious journey. Currently, I've been listening to Peter tease Tris over God knows what, and Tris and her friends dishing it back at him, for the past five minutes. Even worse, Molly and Drew laugh at everything Peter says. Drew laughs silently, so that doesn't bother me, but Molly has an ugly laugh. It reminds me of a horse.

After one of Peter's stupid jabs and a few thrown back by Will and Christina, I've had enough, especially since I know Peter is never going to stop picking on Tris- though she stands up to it quite well, and honestly seems completely unfazed by it- if I don't step in. It's not that she needs me to, but the kid is a real jerk and I am sick of hearing it. I glare from where I stand at the doorway of the car. Tris is sitting there just silently watching me while the others go back and forth. "Am I going to have to listen to your bickering all the way to the fence?" I bellow with obvious irritation.

They all go silent for a while, and Tris gets up to move closer to the train car door, but doesn't approach me. Instead, she just leans against the wall opposite the door, staring out, looking deep in thought… looking troubled, anxious… even maybe mournful. I turn away before she can settle her eyes on mine and bring out that unsettled feeling in me again, the one I get when she looks through my eyes right into my soul. I don't know how she does that.

"Penny for your thoughts, Tris?" Will asks, approaching her. Christina follows and they both lean against the wall near her.

"Hmm?"

"Just an old expression. What's on your mind?"

"Just thinking about what's beyond the fence," Tris says. When I glance back, her expression is dark. I can never quite figure out what she might be thinking. I hold both handles and lean my body out the doorway, listening to Will and Christina make conjectures as to what might be out there. Tris remains silent until Will asks what she thinks could be out there. I've started to think she didn't even hear him when she says, "Maybe something that we could never even imagine." _What does that mean?_

The train brakes with a loud squeal, and I hold the handles tight as the momentum throws me toward the front of the car. After jumping out, I stand aside as the nine initiates jump from the car one by one. "Follow me," I say before leading them to the fence.

I make sure they're all there, then begin my little speech about rankings and jobs. "If you don't rank in the top five at the end of initiation, you will probably end up here. Once you are a fence guard, there is some potential for advancement, but not much. You may be able to go on patrols beyond Amity's farms, but-"

"Patrols for what purpose?" Will interrupts me. Erudite-born. Always curious. Or maybe what Tris said is on his mind.

I shrug. "I suppose you'll discover that if you find yourself among them. As I was saying. For the most part, those who guard the fence when they are young continue to guard the fence. If it comforts you, some of them insist that it isn't as bad as it seems."

"What rank were you?" Peter asks.

I look directly at him when I answer. "I was first."

"And you chose to do _this_? Why didn't you get a government job?" I didn't get a government job mostly because I don't want to see my 'father', Marcus, the head of the council, but I'm certainly not going to share that with Peter. Tris is looking at me with this look of understanding and I don't know how she could possibly understand or even think she does. On the other hand, I don't know why I notice and analyze every look she sends my way.

"I didn't want one," I say simply.

The gates open for an Amity truck, and I walk away from the initiates to say hello to Mia, a girl from my initiation class. I don't see her often as she is usually out here at the fence, working. "Hey, Four!" she greets me with a smile, and we make small talk for a minute. I watch what my initiates are doing as I talk to her and see that an Amity initiate jumps out of the truck and hugs Tris, who looks uncomfortable. She stiffens and her arms lay limply at her sides. The weird pang in my stomach resurfaces- the one that I felt when I saw her with Uriah by the Chasm, the one that I don't understand. I wonder what he would think about her hugging this hippie.

"Need to go break that happy little reunion up?" Mia asks me. She's smirking, though I'm not sure why.

"Uh… yeah, probably should save her from making any poor decisions. She shouldn't be fraternizing with other factions," I agree.

Mia rolls her eyes. "Right. You go save her from herself there." I don't miss the sarcasm. What's she trying to say? That I'm… wait, _am_ I jealous? Of a banjo strumming hippie initiate?! I give her my best 'what on earth are you talking about?' look and she snorts. "I've known you for two years now, Four, and I have never seen you look at a girl like you're looking at her. You've barely glanced at me the whole time we've been talking."

I don't know what I feel about Tris, and I'm not going to figure it out here and now. I shrug and roll my eyes. "I'm their instructor. It's my job to keep an eye on them." She rolls her eyes again. "Good to see you, Mia."

Molly and Tris seem to have been arguing; Molly walks away smirking. Tris's 'friend' has just gone back to the truck when I approach her.

"I am worried that you have a knack for making unwise decisions," I say, frowning at her in disapproval.

Tris sighs. "It was a two minute conversation, and it wasn't like I initiated the it, Four. What was I supposed to do, tell him to get lost? It's just my old next-door-neighbor." I frown, not sure if I believe her that there's nothing between them, but still hoping it's the truth. Not that it matters to me. Or so I tell myself.

I reach out and touch the bruise on her jaw. Even though she had done well in training the other day when she practiced on the punching bags, it was surprising and impressive when she beat Christina yesterday and came out nearly unscathed. Christina is taller and stronger than Tris, and the Candor are much less afraid to hurt others than someone like Tris, who grew up always putting others ahead of herself. "You did well yesterday." I pause, knowing what I _want_ to ask, but not sure if I should, or if I want to hear the answer. I ask anyway. "What did Eric want with you?" I heard him keep her back. I waited around the corner and saw him walk past several minutes later with a smirk on his face; when I left a few minutes later she hadn't come out of the training room.

"I don't know, really… he didn't really yell at me or anything. I stood up for Christina yesterday, and it was like he was _telling_ me he didn't like it… but… I don't know. I got the feeling that… that he's interested in me. I really didn't like it. It was weird. He creeps me out." It feels like a rock settled in my stomach, like a deep, heavy feeling of dread. Eric is dangerous.

"Be careful, Tris. You're dating Uriah, right? Did you tell him about Eric?" As much as it bothered me seeing her with Uriah, he's a good kid and will protect her.

She shakes her head. "No… I tried to tell you that first night, by the chasm. Uriah is just a friend. I think you got the wrong impression of me." _Wait, what?!_ I really thought she and Uriah were together. This conversation is leaving me feeling like I don't know which way is up; hearing her say she isn't involved with Uriah in that way left me feeling lighter, but Eric's interest in her did just the opposite.

I have a sick feeling in my stomach at the thought of Eric setting his sights on Tris. Damn it… I had wanted to just keep my distance from Tris, and now I feel compelled to protect her.

* * *

 _ **Shauna**_

Zeke always works more during initiation. Four can't work his shifts there for those few weeks because he's training initiates, and Zeke picks up quite a bit of the slack. I've been missing him at dinner. Tonight after dinner, I decided to make up a plate for him and bring it by the control room to surprise him.

The room is rarely locked, so I walk right in. Zeke is playing one of the dumb computer games he programmed on his computer rather than watching the screens- typical Zeke. I roll my eyes as I tap him on the shoulder.

He spins in his chair, grinning when he sees me. "Hey, beautiful," he says as he pulls the headphones down around his neck and stands, leaning in to kiss me. "Mmm, lasagna, my favorite. Thank you." I pull up the empty chair from Four's station and sit behind him, leaning back and absently looking at the screens.

I hear Zeke huff a small sigh and follow his gaze. The screen he is looking at shows the training room and I let out an annoyed sigh when I see it, too. On the screen I can see Uriah, but he's not training. He's sitting on the floor against the wall, next to the Stiff. Tris. Just sitting next to her is one thing, but he's got an arm wrapped around her shoulders. I can't see her face- she's facing away from the camera, but I know it's her.

"Uriah sure seems to like that transfer," I say bitterly. Marlene is like a sister to me, and I hated seeing her so upset the other day.

Zeke shakes his head. "Hmm-mm," he hums. "No, actually, they're just friends."

I raise my eyebrows at him and scoff. "Just friends? That doesn't look like just friends to me."

"I'm serious," Zeke insists. "He came in here all down the other night because of girl trouble. I, too, immediately thought it was the Stiff, but he seemed totally confused by that assumption and insisted he cares about her like a sibling, not like _that._ "

I really don't get it now. He's known her less than a week. How do you get close to someone like that in just a couple of days? "Then why does he spend so much time with her?"

Zeke shrugs. "He says they have some crazy connection and he 'can't explain it.' But that it's not romantic." Zeke takes another bite of lasagna, chews, and swallows before continuing. He knows I won't put up with him eating with his mouth open or some shit like that. "His girl troubles were about Marlene."

"What?!" I screech. This is the best news I've heard all week! "He likes Mar?!"

Zeke's head bobs up and down. "Yep," he says, popping the 'p'. "He was upset because he feels like she's distancing herself from him or something."

I huff. I swear, these Pedrad boys. They have a lot of really great qualities- handsome, friendly, funny, daring- but most of the time, 'smart' doesn't make the list. This is one of those times. "And it didn't occur to him, or to _you_ for that matter, that maybe he should not act like he's in love with Tris, if he wants Mar to be falling at his feet? Even if he stayed away from her more now, I doubt it would matter. Mar is convinced that he's 'smitten' over her. And yes, she actually used the word 'smitten.'"

Zeke grins. "We'll have to do something about that then, won't we? Unfortunately, I promised Uriah I wouldn't tell anyone, but we could-"

"And I promised the same to Marlene," I interrupt. "So how are we going to do this?"

Zeke rubs his chin, then his eyes light up. "Tris is what's standing in their way, even if she doesn't mean to. So… we need to find someone for Tris."

I only have to think for a moment. I know just the guy.


	9. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER EIGHT**

 _ **Tris**_

As usual, Al is whimpering in his bed. I'm still uncomfortable around him. Our history- which only I have memory of, as it hasn't happened to him yet- if it will at all- leaves me with my emotions jumbled and conflicted. It's as if every day, every time I see him (or hear him, like right now) there is a battle in my mind between forgiving him for what he did (but hasn't yet done), and the forgiveness I had allowed him after his death before… the forgiveness that I did not give him before he jumped into the Chasm.

Further complicating my jumbled feelings is the resentment and disgust I feel at his refusal to try to win his fights. Just as before, ever since the first fight, he has been taking a single punch and pretending to go unconscious. I didn't fight him at all the first time through initiation, but now things have changed and he was my opponent today. I punched him in the jaw, he fell and refused to get up, feigning unconsciousness. I don't know who I'll be up against for my final fight- the one where I beat Molly, last time- but I wouldn't have minded a little more practice by _actually_ fighting him. Besides, to have someone just _let_ you win… it's insulting. It feels like he thinks he's doing me a favor, because he doesn't believe I stand a chance against him. I don't like it when people underestimate me because they assume just from looking at me that I'm weak.

My Tobias, he didn't underestimate me. His words play in my mind, lifting the corners of my mouth into a smile. ' _You think my first instinct is to protect you. Because you're small, or a girl, or a Stiff. But you're wrong.'_ I remember him leaning forward, his face so close to mine. I remember the way my heart sped up and my skin tingled as his fingers wrapped around my chin, smelling like metal. ' _My_ first _instinct is to push you until you break, just to see how hard I have to press.'_

My breathing quickens at the memory. I miss him so much.

Just then, the moment I've been laying here, fully clothed and awake, and waiting for comes. The dormitory door opens, and I grin as the beams of light from the flashlight the people are holding shine around the room. I sit up, ready to grab my boots, excited for tonight. Tonight is Capture the Flag. The night Tobias and I climbed the ferris wheel.

"Everybody up!" I hear Eric roar. I freeze looking between him and Tobias. They are both looking right at me. I only let myself pause for a moment before I begin to shove my feet into my boots.

"You have five minutes to get dressed and meet us by the tracks," Eric says. "We're going on another field trip."

In a moment I am sprinting. I can hardly wait. The memory of climbing the ferris wheel before with Tobias brings a smile I can't shake off my face.

Up near the track, I am one of the first to grab a paintball gun and shove a couple boxes of paintballs into my jacket pocket. As I do, Christina says, "Are we going to _shoot_ something?" I grin, toss her a box of paintballs, and laugh. I turn away from her and move as close as I can to Tobias- which, unfortunately, also means I'm near Eric- as I hear the train's horn sound in the distance.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

"Time estimate?" Eric asks. I roll my eyes. He's been riding these trains for over two years; how hard is it to memorize the train schedule in that time?

"Any minute now," I answer. "How long is it going to take you to memorize the train schedule?"

"Why should I, when I have you to remind me of it?" He shoves my shoulder, hard, as Tris approaches. She glances at me, then eyes Eric cautiously, seeming to move nearer to me while still trying to keep her distance from Eric. Glancing his way, I don't miss the way Eric's eyes travel down her body and back up. She's absolutely right, he is interested in her, and I have this undeniable urge to block her from his view, as well as the far more familiar impulse to punch him in the face.

The train is approaching now. Eric's eyes roam over Tris's small figure again, and she inches closer to me. As I run and jump onto the train when it arrives, Tris is right on my heels, and I reach out to pull her in. I watch her move further back in the car, undoubtedly trying to stay away from Eric, but her eyes watch me the whole time as if she's begging me to watch out for her. I look for Uriah, but he's across the car with Marlene and Lynn. He glances at Tris, then Eric, here and there, but does not move toward her. Maybe they really are just friends.

When everyone is in, I begin to explain tonight's field trip. "We'll be dividing into two teams to play capture the flag. Each team will have an even mix of members, Dauntless-born initiates, and transfers. One team will get off first and find a place to hide their flag. Then the second team will get off and do the same." I grab the side of the doorway to balance as the train car goes around a bend. "This is a Dauntless tradition," I add, "so I suggest you take it seriously."

"What do we get if we win?" someone shouts- I think it was that asshole Candor, Peter.

"Sounds like the kind of question someone not from Dauntless would ask," I say with full intention of making him look like an idiot. "You get to win, of course."

"Four and I will be your team captains," Eric says and looks at me. "Let's divide up the transfers first, shall we?"

I have to think fast. If Eric goes first, he will pick Tris and I won't be able to watch out for her. At the thought of her and Eric, I feel like I just swallowed a rock. It's a risk, but my best bet might be to just start. "Okay," I say, "I want the Stiff."

Tris looks relieved and smiles at me, and Eric's eyes flash anger. He glares at me. He seems to be too angry and jealous to even come up with a clever dig at me. "Edward," he says through clenched teeth.

We continue back and forth, first the transfers until I end up with Tris, Christina, Will, and Al. Of the three Dauntless born that I actually care about having on my team- Lynn, Uriah and Marlene- I end up with both Lynn and Uriah, but Eric picks Mar before I can make her my third pick.. The members, of which there are only a few, are last, and I pick Shauna and Mia.

"My team gets off first," Eric says and I decide to tease him a bit more.

"Don't do me any favors," I say confidently. "You know I don't need them to win."

Eric was mad and frustrated before, but now he's furious. He's just so easy to get at. I can see why he puts so much energy into trying to bother me: it's really quite amusing. I know just what he's thinking about: he's thinking about having come in second to me in initiation, about being the second choice for leadership, and about having lost this game the past two years.

"Take your scrawny team and get off first, then," he snaps. "I know you'll lose either way." I chuckle as I motion to my team to follow me off the train.

I see Molly trip Tris as she goes to jump, but luckily Uriah is right behind her and keeps her from falling. When Tris has safely jumped off the train, Uriah elbows Molly in the stomach just before he jumps, and I smirk.

After some discussion of where to go, Uriah suggests we go to the carousel, as that's where Zeke's and my team hid our flag when we won this game in our initiation year. Tris walks several yards ahead of me with her friends, including Uriah- which still gives me that weird unsettled feeling in my stomach. Mia is suddenly shoulder to shoulder with me, leaning in close as she speaks softly. "So, you picked her first, huh? And she's a Stiff, is she?"

I glare. "What does that matter? She was the first jumper, you know. She's brave, and she's fast." I don't like something about the way Mia's talking about her though I can't put my finger on it.

"You know, Four," she says, still quietly, "I actually do still remember where you came from. No wonder you like her." _She remembers where I came from?_ Panic rises in me. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. We were both oddballs, remember?" Mia was a transfer from Amity. She's right, it makes sense that she would have noticed.

"She's just an initiate," I insist, but somewhere deep down, I know I don't believe that anymore. Mia just smirks and falls back to chat with Shauna.

We arrive at the carousel and Will takes the flag from me. The initiates argue over who should be in charge, what strategy to use- all offense, all defense, somewhere in between… it reminds me of the bickering on the train yesterday, so I just tune them out. I'm staring off into the moonlit fairgrounds when I notice a familiar blonde head quietly moving away from the group. She's a few dozen yards away when I begin to follow.

Soon, I see where Tris is headed: the ferris wheel. She slings her rifle onto her back, held onto her shoulder by the strap, and climbs onto the ladder of the wheel, bouncing on it a few times to test its strength.

"Tris," I say, when I'm a few yards behind her.

She pauses and looks over her shoulder, but isn't at all startled, as if she were expecting me. "Yes?"

"I came to find out what you think you're doing."

A smile plays at her lips- she looks genuinely amused. "I'm seeking higher ground. I don't _think_ I'm doing anything."

Anyone else and I'd be annoyed at her sassy attitude, but Tris… it's one of my favorite things about her. I know just how much strength and bravery is behind that sarcasm. I grew up where she did, though I'm sure my own home was much more strict than hers. We were still raised with the same values.

I smile, and as I do, I realize just how often I want to smile when I'm around her. It's really kind of odd. I'm not usually someone who smiles much. "Alright," I say, and I can even hear the smile in my voice. "I'm coming."

"I'll be fine," she says, but something about her tone tells me she means the opposite- not that she won't be fine, but that she'd like the company.

"Undoubtedly," I reply. The conversation feels like comfortable banter, a feeling of familiarity that I usually feel only with Zeke and Shauna. As we climb I just want to reach up and touch her… but I am her instructor. I keep my mind on that by asking her questions about what she thinks the point of the exercise is, how it relates to bravery, blah blah blah. She gives good answers, but I'm really only asking her all this so that _I_ don't forget what my job is here- that I am supposed to be her instructor, not her friend or anything else.

When she asks if I'm alright, I finally realize how hard I am breathing. Somehow, though I'm still reacting to my fear of heights- a fear I'd never admit to, by the way- I was too busy thinking about _her_ to consciously register just how high I had climbed. But now that she has drawn attention to my impending panic… well, now, I'm fully aware of exactly where I am. My heart pounds and my throat is dry, and it's hard to swallow.

"Are you even _human_ , Tris?! It doesn't scare you at all? Being up this high?" Before she can answer, a gust of wind nearly blows her off the ladder. I grab her waist with one hand, squeezing her hip slightly as I push her back to safety. Her shirt has ridden up a bit and my fingers touch her bare skin. The jolt of electricity that goes through me at that touch, the warmth of her skin against my hand… I look up at her, desperate to know if she feels it too. "Are you okay?" I ask.

Her voice is tight, but I swear I see longing when her eyes meet mine. "Yes."

Somehow- I have no idea how I will myself to keep climbing, but I am pretty sure it has everything to do with _her,_ and soon we are at the platform halfway up the wheel. _Don't look down, Tobias. Don't look down, don't look down._

Tris is seated with her legs hanging off the edge of the platform and I don't know how she can be so calm, hanging a hundred feet above the ground like this. I cling to the bars behind me.

"You are afraid of heights, Four," Tris says once I have climbed onto the platform next to her. She says it as a statement, a matter of fact. There is no question implied. "Why did you follow me up here? I would have been fine." There's definitely a question now. Not just in her voice, but in her eyes. Her eyes tell me that she needs an answer. A real answer.

So, I search for one, and I know 'I'm your instructor' is not going to satisfy someone as curious as Tris. The answer comes out before I really register what I am saying. "I like being with you."

It's in that moment, that I know. I want her to know me. I want to trust her. I want her to know who I am, where I came from, why I had to leave… I want her to know things I have never trusted anyone with. I am not sure how to tell her, but I will find a way. I just know it, that she's worth it. That she deserves my trust, and that I want to deserve hers.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

I had been so excited for capture the flag. I mean, seriously, for _years_ I have been looking forward to this. And then what happens? I have the misfortune of ending up on Eric's team. That Stiff, Tris, is on Four's team along with Uriah and Lynn, and so are the other transfers I've spent time with- Christina, Will and Al. That leaves me with that asshole Candor, Peter, and his two little minions, a bunch of Dauntless-born that I'm not friends with, a couple members I don't know, and just one decent person in the bunch, which is Edward.

I've thought about Edward here and there, since I saw him on the roof the other night. Now, following Eric toward the park at Navy Pier to hide our flag, I find myself inching closer to him. On the train ride here, the Candor transfer- Peter's little groupie, I think her name was Mary or Molly or something, was gossiping about Edward and Myra. No one stopped her- the other transfers looked uncomfortable, and Tris just looked down at her feet with her fists clenched and cheeks flushed.

Mostly, though, I watched Edward. He just looked away, arms crossed, while Molly went on about the fight she overheard between Edward and his girlfriend, Myra. Well, ex-girlfriend, now, apparently. Molly recounted every detail, none of which was any of her business, of how Myra cried over the near- certainty that she will be cut. I saw the embarrassment on Edward's face as Molly loudly, laughing with her ugly laugh that sounds like it belongs to a barnyard animal, told her asshole friends that Myra had asked if Edward would come with her and he had told her no… and then she had broken up with him. Then, I looked around the train car and saw that Myra didn't even come tonight.

I bump Edward with my shoulder as we walk. "You okay?" I ask. He gives me a wary look. "Molly's loud, I really couldn't help hearing her gossip. As much as I may have tried not to listen, no one can ignore that horse laugh of hers."

I'm pleased to be rewarded with a smile and chuckle from Edward. "I'm not okay right now, really- I really do care a lot about Myra," he says. "But I _will_ be okay."

"Love hurts, sometimes," I say softly. I feel like I know kind of what he's going through. Uriah and I may never have dated, but we've been friends for so long… it hurts all the same. "You can always talk to me, you know. If you need someone. I'm a good listener."

Edward smiles and touches my shoulder as he quietly thanks me.

* * *

"So where should we look first?" Edward and I have been chosen to scout out the other team's location. I'm fast, and Edward is an excellent shot. Plus, we both volunteered. I think he wanted to get away from the rest of the team as badly as I did; Eric mostly chose people who were just as big of jerks as himself.

Edward scowls, but it's playful. "Why are you asking me?"

I elbow him in the arm. "You're supposed to be the smart one, _Nose,_ " I say, using Uriah's term for the Erudite. It's a play on words, because their noses are always in a book, and they _know_ everything, or think they do.

Edward scoffs and tries to look offended. "I can't believe you'd insult me with a name like that…" he trails off, trying to come up with a mean stereotyped name to throw back at me, but he's clearly coming up short. I can't hold back my laughter.

"Maybe you were cut out for Candor, cause you're not fooling me for a second," I laugh.

Edward grins and suddenly, my feet are off the ground and Edward has thrown me over his shoulder. I squeal and remember what we're supposed to be doing as he shushes me… while laughing at the same time. "Put me down!" I whisper-yell.

"With pleasure," he responds, and I know that I should have been more specific- like maybe, 'set me down gently on my feet please, Edward,' as he drops me flat on my ass.

"Jerk!" I pout, ripping a handful of grass out of the ground and throwing it in his face.

I'm having fun, though. As I grin up at him, he extends a hand to help me up. _Being with him is fun like being with Uriah._ The thought startles me.

We resume our walk and I try to think of who else he is friends with, and I realize then that I've really only seen him hang out with Myra. It has been pretty obvious tonight that he isn't friends with Peter and his lackeys, and I haven't seen him around Tris and her groupies either. "What's it going to be like for you without Myra?" I ask. He seems a bit startled by the question. "I mean," I continue, "my best friend has been hanging out with the transfers a lot and that's been a little weird for me. You came her with her and had each other, I haven't seen you hanging around with anyone else, really."

Edward nods. "I don't know. You're the closest thing to a friend that I've made so far."

I stop. "Closest thing, huh? I see how it is," I tease, crossing my arms over my chest. "I don't rate well enough to be considered your _friend,_ apparently."

Edward's eyes look suddenly panicked and he stumbles over his words. "I didn't mean- I didn't want… shit!" His head is in his hands and finally I start laughing.

"I'm really not that easily offended, Eddie," I say, trying out the nickname as I poke him in the side. In the distance I see movement. "What's that?"

Edward turns to follow my line of vision, squinting. "Is that…"

"They turned the ferris wheel!" I exclaim. "What the hell are they thinking? Come on, let's get back to Eric fast!"

* * *

Getting back to Eric fast, as it turns out, was not fast enough. Tris, it turns out, is not only brave, she's also Erudite smart and thought to climb the wheel so she could see farther and we had barely made it back when they divided, conquered, and had the flag. My first thought was to wonder if Uriah went with her, but then I heard him going on about how she was there then suddenly, she wasn't, so I guess he didn't. All I can say about my team's loss is that I really hope Eric decides to watch the transfers tomorrow rather than us Dauntless-born, because he was completely pissed. I really thought at any moment, he might drop to the floor and throw a kicking and screaming, toddler-style temper tantrum. He avoided going to that extreme, but only just.

On the train ride back, I invite Edward to hang out with Uriah, Lynn and me, as well as Uriah's transfer friends. I may as well give them a chance, I figure, especially if it will help Edward make some new friends, which would make his break-up with Myra easier on him. The whole way back we're laughing and talking, and I find myself paying more attention to Edward than anyone else, even Uriah.

When we get off the train, my heart drops to my stomach when I see Myra there waiting. I walk slowly, dragging a ways behind the others, eavesdropping on their conversation as I walk away. For some reason, I just need to know.

"I'm so sorry, Edward, please, let's just forget that fight," Myra pleads in a sickly-sweet voice. I roll my eyes. She's going to be factionless in a few days either way.

"Myra…" comes Edward's voice.

"Edward… please. I love you." Her voice, she's literally begging now.

"No, Myra," Edward says. "I care about you, but we both know that you're going to be cut in a few days. I'm not leaving with you. I'm staying here at Dauntless. I'm beginning to make friends, even. Care about… other people here. There's just no future for us."

I pause around the corner where I can still hear them. I'm not eavesdropping _really_ … I just think maybe he'll need a friend when they're done talking.

Myra's voice is cold and angry now. "I can't believe you! I came here… for _you!_ I could have stayed in Erudite, _we_ could have stayed there and lived happily ever after, Edward! And now you're just going to abandon me when I need you most?!"

"I never asked you to follow me, Myra!" he yells. "I tried to tell you not to! Look, I care for you, but I can't give up the entire rest of my _life_ for you. I'm sorry that this was the choice you made, but that isn't my fault. You need to take responsibility for your own mistakes. I'm sorry."

I hurry a little ways ahead as I hear a stifled scream, probably Myra with her hands over her face. Edward rounds the corner. "Did you hear all that?" he asks.

"Uh… yeah." I can feel the blush creeping onto my cheeks. "I just… I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I am, actually," he says, smiling slightly. "I wasn't, earlier. But then I had fun with you out there, and I just… I can be happy here, still. She shouldn't have chosen Dauntless to follow me. It was time for a clean break."

We walk back to the dorms together. I glance at him here and there, and just as often, I can feel his gaze on me. He stops in front of my dormitory before moving on to his own. "See you at breakfast?" he says, looking hopeful.

"Sure, sounds great," I say. I surprise even myself by impulsively pulling him in for a hug. Then I give him a little wave and a small smile. "Goodnight, Edward," I say as I walk back into the dorm, unable to wipe the smile off my face.


	10. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER NINE**

 _ **Tris**_

The next morning I feel happy and light. Climbing the ferris wheel with Tobias had been much the same as before… but even better. My heart has soared ever since the moment he said he liked to be with me. I feel like this is really going to happen- he really is going to fall in love with me again. I have been more and more discouraged each day, worrying that I had come back to be with him only to have him not want me anymore.

This morning, we are learning to throw knives. Tobias has just demonstrated and everyone has begun to throw. I remember how last time, I practiced without the knife in my hand first, so I use the same strategy once again, but not long enough for Peter to tease me again. I was always pretty good at throwing knives.

Then again, I don't want any more questions about where I learned to do this, like I received on the first day of training. I pick up my knife and aim about halfway between the center of the bullseye and the edge of the target. The knife lands right about where I aimed it and sticks in the target. I'm still the first one to hit the target at all. I notice Peter narrowing his eyes at me and I smirk at him.

I stop aiming away from the center after a few throws and hit bullseye after bullseye. I feel someone's presence behind me and my gut tells me it's not Tobias. No, it is not the man I love… it is the man whose proximity chills my blood and fills me with dread. Eric.

"Very good, Tris," he murmurs behind me. The way he hisses out the 's' at the end of my name, like a snake, makes me shiver. "You really are quite… fascinating." He is inches away and every muscle in my body is tense now. After I don't know how long, I notice that I'm holding my breath and force myself to exhale, then inhale, then exhale again. I throw another knife, and for the first time, it doesn't go where I tried to aim, but luckily it does still hit the board and stick. Eric clicks his tongue. "Do I make you nervous, Tris?"

I haven't yet answered when I am saved by Al's clumsiness. Eric has finally noticed Al's knives clattering to the floor. Most of them are first hitting the wall several feet away from his target. He's really, _really_ , bad at this.

Eric's head snaps in Al's direction and he stalks away from me. I know what is about to happen, so I feel a little guilty at the breath of relief I release as Eric walks away. I glance at Tobias. He's staring at me intently. His face shows the impassive Instructor Four mask, but I don't miss the worry in his eyes.

I wince at Eric's familiar words as he reaches Al. "How slow _are_ you, Candor? Do you need glasses? Should I move the target closer to you?"

My stomach clenches. Conflicted though my feelings for Al may be, deep in the pit of my stomach, I _know_ that I won't be able to watch him tremble in front of that target. As I continue throwing my knives at the target, sighing heavily and tuning out his and Eric's voices as their exchange plays out. I ignore it all… right up until I hear Eric shout, "Everyone stop!" The knives stop, and a heavy, suffocating silence settles over the room. "Clear out of the ring," Eric says and he trains his cold gaze on Al. "All except you."

"Stand in front of the target." Al obeys, his hands shaking. "Hey, Four," Eric says. "Give me a hand here."

I don't watch this time. I just train my eyes on Al and wait. "You're going to stand here as he throws these knives, until you learn not to flinch."

I close my eyes and try to talk myself out of what I'm about to do. I try. I fail. I don't need to listen to what he and Tobias are saying. I could probably recite the conversation from memory.

I wait for Tobias to prepare to throw the first knife, then I hear my own voice: " _Stop_ it." This is so stupid. So stupid. The last thing I need is more attention from Eric. Al doesn't deserve my help. Yet… here I am, standing up for him once again.

"Any idiot can stand in front of a target," I say. "All that proves is that you're bullying us. Bullying is a sign of cowardice. Are you a _coward_ , Eric?"

Eric's eyes flash with anger, but he also looks slightly conflicted. Regretful. But no matter how he might think he feels about me this time around, Eric's pride is too important to him. "Then it should be easy for you, if you're willing to take his place."

Four won't hurt me much. Just a nick to the ear. I'll be fine. I show no sign of fear as I cross the room to the target, because I don't feel any fear. I can trust Tobias. He won't hurt me any more than he must.

I don't bother trying to smile at Al this time around. I am still too wary of him. But that doesn't mean that I'd want to see him get hit with a knife, and I'm pretty sure he _would_ flinch enough to end up in the way.

I tip my chin up. Eric isn't the only one here who is prideful. I look directly into Tobias's blue eyes. "If you flinch," he says carefully, deliberately, "Al takes your place. Understand?" I nod. This time, I understand that he isn't taunting me; he is helping me reach inside for every bit of Abnegation stubbornness and strength I have deep inside me.

My eyes don't leave his as the knife whizzes through the air and sticks in the board half a foot away from my cheek.

"You about done, Stiff?"

I tip my chin higher. My eyes do not leave Tobias's for a moment. "No," I answer defiantly. The next knife buries itself in the target just above the part in my hair.

"Come on, Stiff," Tobias says. _He's just reminding me what happens if I fail,_ I remind myself, pushing down the resentment that threatens to take over. "Let someone else stand there and take it."

I set my jaw and firmly say, "Just throw, Four." He's trying to communicate with his eyes that he's sorry for what he's about to do, and this time, I see it. I understand what he's saying to me. With my own eyes, I try to tell him that I understand, I trust him, that it's okay.

He throws the knife. I feel the sting, and blood begins to trickle down my ear. I let out a sigh of relief. I know this was the last one. It's over.

"I would love to stay and see if the rest of you are as daring as she is," Eric says, "but I think that's enough for today." He stalks over to me and gently grabs my chin, turning my head to look at him. I suppress a shiver. "I have my eye on you, Tris."

Everyone follows Eric out of the training room, leaving Tobias and I alone. "Is your ear okay?" I don't interrupt him this time. I'm not angry.

"It's fine," I say. I just stare at him. I'm at a loss for what to say next. Tobias crosses the room and pulls a box out of a cupboard, then returns with a piece of gauze.

"If I hadn't cut you," he says quietly as he gently wipes the blood from my ear, "you'd still be standing there. You should be more careful about drawing that kind of attention to yourself with Eric around."

"I know," I say. His eyes pull me in. I feel like I could drown in them. "Thank you. I just couldn't stand to watch Al stand there. He would have flinched, and you would have hit him, even if you didn't mean to."

"Careful, Tris. Dauntless is as much about conformity as the other factions. If you don't pretend that selfless impulse is going away, it will get you into trouble." His hand lingers on my cheek as he pulls it away from my ear. After a moment, he drops it. His forehead is wrinkled, and a crease forms between his eyebrows. "I don't want to see you get hurt."

My mind flashes to that day in the hallway, after he and Zeke found us in the training room, and I gather my courage and do just what I did then: I reach out and press my palm against his, intertwining our fingers. We stand there for a moment and he squeezes my hand. "Thanks, T-" I cut myself off. _Shit! I almost said his name!_ "...Four." I drop his hand, and walk out of the training room without looking back.

My heart is pounding, both in nervousness at my slip-up and the elation of his touch, and I am so distracted that I don't notice that someone is waiting for me around the corner- not until he has grabbed me, pushing me against the wall.

"Did you forget, Tris," Eric says in a smooth voice that makes my skin crawl, "our conversation about insubordination?" His eyes flick from my eyes to my lips, then back.

"No, I didn't forget," I say in a tight voice. "But I would have been a coward if I hadn't spoken up."

"You were brave," he murmurs. His hands rest on the wall on either side of my head, and he lifts one and traces my jawline with two fingers. "But we train soldiers here, not rebels. Do you think you can remember that in the future, Tris?" I nod slowly, my eyes wide. He's looking at my lips again and I just want to disappear.

"Everything okay here?" Tobias's voice floods me with relief.

Eric pushes off the wall and glares at Tobias. I take the opportunity to scurry back to the middle of the hallway. "Everything's fine, isn't it, Tris?" I nod slowly, inching closer to Tobias.

"I think your friends went to the Pit, Tris." Tobias doesn't take his eyes off Eric, and his body is tense. "Maybe you should go look for them there."

"Thank you, Four, I will." I catch his eye for just a second as I hurry away, whispering another nearly inaudible "thanks."

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

I'm coming out of the dormitory when someone literally runs right into me, nearly knocking me over. I look down to see who has landed themselves flat on their ass and am surprised to see Tris. I reach out and pull her up. "Woah, what happened?" From the way she was sprinting down the hall, plus her wide eyes and the overall spooked look on her face, it's pretty obvious that something upset her.

She shakes her head. "It was just… remember how Four had to throw knives at me because I stood up for Al?"

"Tris…" I scold. "You did it _again?_ Was Four upset with you?" That must be why she's so upset. Things were finally going better with them…

She shakes her head side to side. "No, that's not the problem. Eric."

If he hurt her… well, I don't know what I can do about it. I know what I'd _want_ to do about it, though, and it would end with one of us unconscious- hopefully Eric. "What did he do, Tris?" I ask, my fists clenched at my sides. "Did he hurt you?"

"No… he just… he cornered me. It seemed like he was about to actually kiss me! He just… he really creeps me out, Uriah." Her eyes are pooling with tears. "But Four got him to let me go. That's why I was running."

I put a hand on her back to lead her with me toward the Pit. "I didn't like how he was looking at you last night, Tris." But I continue with a smile. "I could tell Four didn't like it much either," I say, wiggling my eyebrows. She smacks me in the arm, but she's smiling now.

I lead her to the dining room for some chocolate cake. I had hoped I'd find Marlene here, but I don't see her anywhere. It's early so there aren't many people in here yet; we sit down at a table that is empty other than Myra moping at the other end.

In between bites of cake, I ask Tris, "Have you seen Marlene around anywhere? I was heading out to look for her when you ran into me."

Down the table from me, Myra snorts. Tris and I both look to her with raised eyebrows. "That's that Dauntless-born with the curly hair and the flirtatious smile, right?" says Myra with more venom in her voice than I would have ever expected to be possible from her. She always has looked so sweet. Then again, so does Tris, and she can get pretty pissed sometimes, too.

"Yeah, why?" I ask.

Marlene rolls her eyes. "She's probably with _Edward._ " Why would she be with Edward? Isn't Edward Myra's boyfriend? I look at Tris for an explanation.

She looks slightly confused, too, but says to me, "Myra and Edward broke up yesterday."

"Yep," Myra agrees, popping the 'p', "and your little friend _Marlene_ was all too happy to comfort him. I see how he looks at her." Myra crosses her arms angrily, but there are tears in her eyes.

My eyes dart to Tris's, and my heart is pounding. "Tris," I breathe, "what if she falls for him? She can't… I can't… this wasn't supposed to happen!" I don't even want to eat my cake anymore. Anyone who knows me well knows that if I don't want cake, it's serious.

Tris shakes her head and reaches across, resting her hand on top of mine. "No… she's meant for you… I know it. We'll figure something out. We will." But she doesn't look so sure.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

As Tris scurries away from Eric and past me, I barely catch her whispering, "thanks," but I can see the relief and gratitude in her eyes. I only let myself glance at her for a moment before my eyes are trained on Eric again.

"Do you have a problem, Four?" Eric hisses. He's angry. Very angry. He was already mad that he lost the war games for the third year running, particularly that he lost for the third time _to me_ , in addition to our usual mutual hatred of one another.

"No problem," I reply, "as long as you're not causing problems with my initiates. I don't like to see power and size used to intimidate those who are powerless and small. She's just a little girl from Abnegation, Eric." I know that isn't true, not at all. Tris is strong in a way I have rarely seen in anyone. Right now, though, getting at Eric is the only goal.

"I think you should mind your own business, Four." Eric stalk toward me, stopping when he knows he's much closer than I am comfortable with. I need my personal space. "Don't forget who is in charge here."

"Oh, I don't forget, Eric. You make sure of that. You must be pretty insecure to remind me so often." I narrow my eyes at him. "Are you… _afraid_? That I'm still better than you? That you're still second best?"

His fists clench and his face turns red. "You had better watch your back, _Tobias._ " With that, Eric turns on his heel and stomps away.

* * *

I drop into the seat next to Zeke with a deep sigh, scrubbing my face with my hands before grabbing a roll off his plate. "I'd tell you to get your own damn roll, but you look like you might punch me if I do," Zeke says. "What's going on, man?"

"Just… bad day. I had a run-in with Eric. He seems to be interested in one of my initiates and she is clearly uncomfortable with it."

Zeke shakes his head in clear sympathy for my unfortunate initiate.

"Speaking of your initiates," Shauna says, "we had breakfast with Tris this morning, I really enjoyed her. She's sweet but sarcastic at the same time."

I can't hold back my smile. "Yeah, she's brave and smart, too. She was the one I just rescued from Eric. He made me throw knives at her today and she didn't even get mad at me for cutting her ear."

Zeke and Shauna stare at me with wide eyes and dropped jaws. "You _threw knives_ at her?! Why?" Zeke asks.

I explain about how it was supposed to be Al, but Tris, selfless as always, stood up for him and took his place. "She's something else, isn't she?" Zeke says. "No wonder Uriah likes her."

Shauna's eyes harden slightly when Zeke says that, and she turns to Zeke like it reminds her of something. "So, speaking of that… let's invite her to zip lining and get my cousin Jason to come."

It takes me only a second to recall Shauna's cousin. He was the first jumper in last year's initiate class, but I did not train him, he's a Dauntless born. If I remember correctly, he ranked second and has a government job, faction ambassador, I think. Mostly I just remember that whenever all the initiates were together, the female transfers couldn't keep their eyes off him.

Why did she mention inviting both Tris, and then Jason, in the same breath? An uneasy feeling in my stomach is creeping up on me.

"What does Jason have to do with Tris?" I ask.

Zeke turns toward me with a smirk. "Nothing, yet. But don't you think they'd be good together?"

"Not particularly," I say flatly. "I don't really know him well but I can't see it. Why are you trying to set Tris up in the first place?" My pulse has quickened, and I wipe my sweaty palms on my pants legs.

Shauna furrows her eyebrows. I guess I usually don't have much opinion or objection to anyone's love life, let alone an initiate. "Well, you know he and Lisa just broke up a few weeks ago, and I just really liked Tris. She gets along so well with Uriah, I'm sure she'd be just fine with Jason. Is there some reason you think this is a bad idea?"

"I- I don't…" I stammer. I never stutter like that. Crap. "I just don't like it. She's different, but she did just come here from Abnegation like a week ago. And whether there's a rule or not, an initiate really shouldn't be dating a member, she should be concentrating on initiation. I- oh, whatever!" I know I am letting way too much emotion creep into my voice, and I just don't know how to stop it. All I know is, I feel sick to my stomach at the thought of Tris and some guy. "Do whatever you want. Doesn't matter to me." I push my chair back abruptly and quickly march out of the dining hall.

I know I shouldn't tell Tris how I feel about her while I'm still her instructor. If anyone found out, her rank- which is likely to be high, I have a feeling- will come into question. But now Zeke and Shauna are forcing my hand. I can't let them hook her up with the most eligible bachelor of last year's initiate class without making my move first. I'm going to have to come up with some way to tell her about me, and I need to do it soon.


	11. Chapter 10

_**Edward and Marlene is an unconventional pairing, I know, but sorry, I won't give any spoilers. You'll just have to wait and see...**_ _ **Thanks so much, again, for the reviews, follows and favorites!**_

 **CHAPTER TEN**

 _ **Tris POV**_

Today is the last day of stage one, and our final fights. I don't know who I'll be up against, but I'm not too worried; I'm pretty sure the only ones I can't beat are Edward and Peter, but even if I lose this fight, I'm in no danger of being cut. I've won all my other fights so far.

I bought some new clothes last night, remembering how I had to go back to the dormitory in only a towel on this day last time around. I hadn't forgotten to bring clothes in with me; the problem was that as I've gained muscle during training, my clothes simply didn't fit any more. So this time, I am prepared.

At least, I thought I was. What I didn't anticipate was Peter and Molly coming into the bathroom while I was showering… and running off with not only my clothes, but also my towel. Yep, that's right. My shower is just about done and it looks like I will have to walk down the hall completely and totally naked and exposed. My cheeks flush and my hands are balled into fists. I'm so angry that I scream out loud. This is just sick. Who does that?!

I shut off the water and look around hoping that someone left a dirty towel or _something_ in this bathroom but there is nothing. The door begins to swing open and I run and hide behind it. I may not be as self-conscious as I was when I was fresh out of Abnegation, but I still don't really want to be seen without even my underwear!

The door only opens a few inches and I sigh in relief when I hear a familiar voice. "Tris? I saw Peter run off down the hall and I heard you scream. Is everything okay?" _Thank heavens for Uriah!_

"Uri!" I gasp in relief. "Peter and Molly stole my clothes and towel. I have nothing to cover myself with. Can you bring me something?"

Uriah calls out in the affirmative, and I hear him muttering about pansycakes as he jogs away. It feels like forever, even though I know it's just a minute, before he's back. This time he actually comes into the bathroom, standing with his back against the door, but he keeps his eyes shut, respecting that he knows I would be extremely uncomfortable. He holds out the bath towel for me and I grab it. "Thank you _so much,_ Uriah!" I call out as I quickly wrap the towel around me. I don't hesitate now to come out of the bathroom; it's just Uriah, and no one can see anything important with the towel around me.

"Want me to beat them up?" he asks, looking completely serious and unusually angry.

I shake my head no as he walks down the hall with me with his arm protectively around my shoulder. "I need to fight my own battles, but thanks, Uri," I say with a smile, and I kiss him on the cheek, just like I would if it were Caleb helping me with something like this, before I hurry into the dormitory.

Peter is whistling and fluffing his pillow and Molly is sitting on her bed. She looks over at me with a smirk, then a scowl when she sees that I found a towel. I notice my clothes peeking out from under her bed, and march over and snatch them out quickly.

Back near my own bunk, I quickly sort through the clothes and prepare to pull on the underwear. But there that bitch is again, pulling hard at my towel.

"You look like you're twelve, Stiff," Peter cackles, and Molly snorts out her hideous laugh.

"God, you're pale," she adds.

I shrug as I pull on my clothes. I refuse to let them see me upset about this. I will not give them that satisfaction. "At least I don't look like some disgusting ogre and laugh like a horse," I say with a false sweetness in my voice as I tie the laces on my black sneakers.

Molly glares daggers at me. Guess I hit a sore spot, did I? "You scrawny little bitch!" Molly says as I stand up. She swings at me. Hasn't she learned yet that I'm the better, faster fighter? I dodge out of the way, then immediately after, I punch her in the nose. It immediately begins to gush blood; I think I broke it.

"Stay away from me," I say in a low voice, then I saunter out of the room.

For all my efforts not to have Peter and his lackeys laugh at my naked body this time around, they ended up doing worse. When I enter the training room, still filled with rage, I pray that I will be fighting Molly, like I did for my last fight the first time around. I want to hurt them, and I will. My mouth forms a wicked grin when I see the chalkboard. I'm not paired with Molly this time. No, even better: today I get to fight Peter, and our fight is last.

Normally I probably couldn't beat him, but to say I'm motivated today would be an understatement. I remember his weaknesses: he steps before he punches, and that will help me dodge his attacks; he's quick, but not as quick as I am, and he's cocky. Despite how well I have done in training so far, I don't think that he will see me as a threat.

"There goes your winning streak," Christina says sympathetically. I frown at her. Does she _still_ see me as weak?! With no faith at all that I have even the slightest chance at winning? I hate being underestimated, and now I not only want to exact revenge on Peter, I want to show everyone in this room just how strong I am. I _will_ win this fight.

Will and Myra fight first. Myra is easily the weakest of the bunch, so it's over in just a couple of punches. The same goes for Christina's fight against Al, as once again, he's taking a punch or two and pretending to be unconscious. I roll my eyes. Why did he even join Dauntless? Did he really not expect to have to fight?

Molly fights Edward next and I take particular joy in watching him beat her bloody. Edward is an excellent fighter; he's tall and strong, but not overly bulky. He's quick, smart, and has been studying hand-to-hand combat for years. She never stood a chance. No one in our initiate class stands a chance against Edward, honestly. Maybe some of the Dauntless-borns. I think he and Uriah would be evenly matched.

Edward and Molly's fight does last longer than the first two I watched, but soon he's dragging her off to the infirmary and Peter and I take the ring. "You look like you're going to cry," Peter teases. I think he's somehow mistaking rage for fear. Not a good mistake to make. "I might go easy on you if you cry. I mean, I already feel sorry for you, so scrawny and pale. That was a nice birthmark on your right butt cheek, too."

I surprise him now with a punch to the throat. I smirk as he gasps and stumbles back, while I quickly round him and kick his feet out from under him. I get a few kicks to his ribs in before he grabs my foot and pulls me down. I'm flat on my back, and he hovers over me, his face flushed with rage, but doesn't get a good enough hold on me before he tries to punch my jaw and I roll out from under him.

A moment later we're both back on our feet. I block his next punch with my forearm, then dodge the next one, elbowing Peter hard in the stomach. He tries to kick me, but he hasn't fully regained his balance from the blow to his stomach, and I easily knock him down again. Blind fury is all that I'm aware of as I kick him in the head and ribs. It's just like my fight with Molly last time, it's like deja vu, except I think if it's even possible, I'm twice as angry as I was then.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

As soon as the initiates entered the training room this morning, I noticed that Tris was… I don't know, a little off this morning. On edge. Once her turn to fight against Peter came up and they both entered the ring, my stomach was in knots. Tris is an impressive fighter given her size and background, always using her brain and winning through superior strategy, but the odds were not in her favor against Peter. So, I steeled myself for the worst.

But here I stand, watching in shock as Tris ruthlessly kicks Peter in the head and ribs. He has given up, she has won, but she doesn't stop. It reminds me of my fight with Eric during my own initiation, when nothing short of white hot rage carried me through it. I can clearly see that it is the same for Tris now, and if I don't stop her, she might actually kill him.

"Tris, stop!" I yell as I run into the ring and wrap my arms around hers, holding her arms down, my chest pressed against her back. I lift her off the ground, pulling her away from a very bloody Peter. "You've won, Tris. Stop. It's over."

She stops fighting me and just turns, looking into my eyes as if they are her lifeline, panting. Her face is red and her fists are still clenched. "Everyone, you're done for today. Someone take Peter to the infirmary. You're all dismissed," I call out, not taking my eyes off Tris.

The initiates file out of the room and I occasionally glance at the initiates as they leave. Al drags Peter out, and I notice him watching me, his eyes cold- maybe jealous, or worried. I can't think about that right now and it doesn't matter, he will almost certainly be factionless in a few days anyway.

Tris is still breathing heavily, and she hasn't yet ripped her gaze from my face. My hands find either side of her face, my eyes search hers. Her breathing is finally beginning to slow. "Tris? Are you okay? What happened to make you so angry?" She still just stares. "Come on, Tris, I know that wasn't just you wanting to win, something happened. You can talk to me," I plead.

Her eyes shine with tears, but none fall. "I was in the shower this morning and he stole my clothes and towel," she says. I close my eyes to compose myself. The idea of Tris having to walk back through that hallway with nothing to cover her… everyone able to see her… my blood pressure rises. She continues, "Uriah saw him, checked on me without opening the door enough to look. He brought me a towel." _Thank God for Uriah._ "But then back in the dormitory, Molly ripped the towel off of me, and she and Peter just… stood around making fun of me."

Now it all make sense. Peter deserved what he got, and worse. She ruined him, and she had every right to. Now all I feel is a mix of anger at Peter and Molly and pride at how Tris stood up for herself against someone who is probably twice her size. She truly is amazing.

"Well," I finally say, "you sure showed him." Finally she cracks a smile and I automatically smile back. Her breathing has finally stabilized. "Are you okay now?" She nods, finally looking away from me.

Even though she beat the crap out of him, I don't want to just let this go, nor should I, as her instructor. It's not just as her instructor though, either. I personally want to see him pay for this. "Tris, I could report this. It's unacceptable. I can't let someone treat you that way… I… this isn't right, Tris."

Tris shakes her head, eyes wide. "No, Four. Please. I just want to drop it. I want to fight my own battles, and I did."

I really wish she would let me bring this to Max, but I understand her feelings on it, and I respect her too much to challenge her decision on this. With a sigh, I nod. "Okay, Tris. Just… be careful. Rely on your friends to help protect you."

Tris simply nods. "I'll see you later… Four," she says with a sigh and turns to leave.

I catch her wrist in my hand, and she looks at me over her shoulder. I swallow hard. "Tris… I want to show you something."

Her eyes light up with curiosity. "Okay… what is it?"

I shake my head. "Can you meet me by the chasm tonight? Eleven o'clock?" She nods and smiles slightly, then leaves without another word.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

I'm on the roof at sunset again. I won my final fight, but I don't feel like celebrating. All day, my mind has been on what I saw this morning.

I was walking down the hallway when I saw Tris walking out of the bathroom in absolutely nothing but a towel… and Uriah walked out with her. I couldn't see their faces as they walked away from me, but the body language said it all. They walked with his arm wrapped around her shoulders, and at the door to the dormitory, they talked for a second, and then… with the _Stiff_ stood there in absolutely nothing but a towel, she raised herself up so she was standing on her toes and she kissed him on the cheek. He smiled after her as I rushed into an alcove so he wouldn't see me.

I sigh as the scene replays in my head again. He was in the bathroom with her naked. She was comfortable enough with him to go walking around in just a towel?! Stiffs aren't usually comfortable showing… anything. Until she got to Dauntless, she probably had never even shown her forearms. I shake my head and sigh once again as I hear footsteps approaching. When the person intruding on my solitude sits down, I finally glance his way. Edward.

"Tough day?" he asks. I nod slowly.

"You're trying to get over Myra," I say, "and I'm trying to get over someone, too."

He raises his eyebrows. "Want to talk about it? I'm a good listener, too, you know."

I shake my head. "Not right now."

We sit and watch the sunset for a while again. "Tomorrow's the day," he says.

"What?" I ask. "Visiting day?"

Edward laughs. "Well, that too, though I doubt my parents will be coming to see me." He pauses. "I meant it's the day we get the rankings. Tomorrow will be Myra's last night at Dauntless, then she'll be cut and have to leave." I nod slowly and put my hand on top of his. "Are you nervous?"

"Me?" I ask. "What, for the rankings?" He nods. "No… I won most of my fights. I won't be cut." A small part of me hopes Tris will be cut, then I feel really bad about even thinking it.

"Edward," I say, thinking back to his comment about his parents. "You were born for Dauntless, from what I've heard about and seen. If your parents don't show up tomorrow, don't let it get to you. They're not worth it if they can't accept you for who you are. You have people here who think you're pretty amazing." I blush slightly… I probably shouldn't have said that.

He smiles. "Well, Marlene," he says, "I hope you know that whoever it is that you are trying to get over is an idiot, because you're beautiful, kind, brave, fun… anyone would be lucky to be with you." In this moment, I realize how much we've leaned in toward each other. We're breathing the same air. Maybe I don't need Uriah at all. Maybe…

And in that moment, Edward closes the distance and presses his lips to mine.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

I arrive at the Chasm ten minutes before eleven o'clock. In the five minutes I wait for Tris, my anxiety rises at a pretty constant rate; by the time she steps into view, I am getting worried that I might lose my dinner, I'm so nervous. Maybe this isn't a good idea. What if she pities me? Then I'll still have to see her every day for weeks while feeling completely uncomfortable and ashamed.

She smiles at me as she approaches and looks at me almost adoringly. I'm afraid she will never look at me that way again after she knows everything. But I take a deep breath and motion for her to follow me anyway. I'll take the risk. I decided I could trust her for a reason. I have to give her the chance to prove that my instincts are right.

We don't say a word as she follows me up to the Pire, and too soon, we are standing outside our destination, the Fear Landscape room.

"You haven't been in a fear simulation yet," I say, "but this is like what we use for the final test. It's kind of like the aptitude test, but you'll be aware, and the program will show your deepest fears. Right now, it's set to mine." I finally look at Tris, but she doesn't look… weirded out, or anything, by me showing her this.

"You would let me see that?" she asks, looking only slightly surprised.

I shrug. "It's why we're here." I pull out the black box, which I have stocked with two prepared syringes. I reach to inject her, forgetting again that she has not been through fear sims yet.

She doesn't flinch when I inject the serum into her neck, and then I hand the other syringe to her, leaning down so she can reach my neck. I have been through my fear landscape countless times, and since completing initiation two years ago, I have always injected myself. This time, though… I will be injecting her with serums as her instructor all next week. I want her to know that I see her as my equal, not my subordinate. I want this experience to be as much about her as it is about me. I tap the spot where she should pierce my skin with the needle, and she does not hesitate, her hands surprisingly steady, as if she had done this before.

"See if you can figure out why they call me Four." As I say this, the scene around us transforms.

We stand high up in the sky, on top of a skyscraper. Tris leans against me and I'm thankful for it; I'm having trouble breathing, and I close my eyes to block out the view as I hold onto her shoulders for stability and strength. "We have to face the fear or slow down my heart rate and breathing," I say, now realizing I haven't told her how exactly this works. I feel her nod her head; I clench my teeth as I force myself to breathe in and out, in and out.

"So we have to jump, right?" she asks. I nod without opening my eyes. I feel her hand press against mine, and I hold on tight, as she counts to three and I am abruptly pulled to the edge and into a free fall. My heart races, and I am going to die. I am falling and I am going to die, I am going to-

I am back on solid ground, and I open my eyes. Tris stands quickly, completely unfazed by that terrifying jump, and holds out her hand to help me up. "Now what?" she asks. Does she understand that this is not a _game_ to me? That these situations are utterly terrifying?!

"It's-" I am cut off by walls slamming against my back and appearing in front of me and to the sides. "Confinement," I groan, immediately beginning to panic again.

"Okay, just breathe, Four, it's okay. We make it worse to make it better, right? Face your fear?" All I can do is groan. Even in this box, Tris's hands on mine spread warmth up my arms. She pulls me down and the box shrinks.

"This is much worse. Definitely much worse," I say between panicked breaths. Tris presses her back against my chest and guides my hands so that my arms wrap around her. "Breathe when I breathe," she says, and she puts my hand on her chest, just above her heart. "Feel my heartbeat. See how steady it is?"

Steady is not what I would call it. "It feels really fast," I say. "Why is your heart beating so fast, Tris?" This is actually good. My attention is not _only_ on this damned box now.

"Well… it's fast… because I'm in a box pressed up against a boy that I like kind of a lot…"

I break into probably the biggest grin that has ever crossed my face. I lean in even closer, so close that my lips nearly touch her ear, and whisper, "you like me kind of a lot?"

"Mmm-hmmm," she hums as the wooden walls of the box we were trap in splinter and burst around us, setting us free.

"I have never gotten out of that so fast before." I'm still smiling, and it's not dark any more so I can see her smiling back at me.

But I glance over my shoulder and there she is, waiting for me. The woman- an innocent. She points a gun at me, but she doesn't shoot. My blood runs cold and my stomach twists with dread as I make my way to the table with the gun.

"She's not real, Tobias," Tris says softly. "I know she looks real… it feels real… but it's not."

I bite my lip and nod. "This one isn't so bad. It's not so much panic… more just... dread." I feel Tris's hand rest gently on my back, and that inner strength that I've seen so many times already, I swear I can feel it pour through her hand into me. I load the bullet into the bun, aim, look away, and pull the trigger.

The woman slumps to the floor.

"Here we go," I whisper. Because the worst one is next. The one where all the cards are on the table, where she knows my deepest secrets, my identity, everything. I'm so anxious, it's making me dizzy, but Tris grabs my hand just as my father creeps into view. He wears Abnegation gray and holds his hands behind his back, and I'm already shrinking away from him.

"Marcus," she whispers, and her eyes are trained on him filled with hatred, though I don't know what for.

But I can't think about that right now, because Marcus is right in front of me with black pits for eyes, and he shows us his hand, holding the belt. He says the words that haunt my nightmares, the words I heard so often. "This is for your own good." We are abruptly surrounded by his clones, a dozen of him total, all ready to beat me bloody.

I am frozen in terror. Marcus raises the belt and I can hear nothing but the pounding of my own heart as I close my eyes, steeling myself for the lash that is about to strike me. But it doesn't come.

I'm shocked by what I see when I open my eyes. The belt is wrapped around Tris's wrist, her teeth clenched in pain. She took the hit to protect me. No one has ever protected me before, no one has taken pain so that I would not have to. The people who were supposed to love me never did, but here is this small, brave, selfless girl, protecting me from my worst nightmare.

And _that_ gives me strength that I never thought I would find. Suddenly I am so angry, there is no room left for fear. How _dare_ he hit her? I jump forward, pushing Tris behind my back as he lunges at her. I don't even think, and my fist flies, striking him hard in the jaw. One hit is all I get; all the Marcuses disappear and we are back in the fear landscape room.

Tris looks at me. "And that's why they call you Four..." she says with just a hint of a smile. "...Tobias," she finishes softly. Somewhere in my mind it registers that I have never heard my name said that way before- like a revelation, as if it's the most beautiful thing in the world. It's almost musical, when Tris says it.

I stare at her for a moment, frozen by shock at the way she stood up for me, my lips parted and eyes wide. Before I even know what I am doing, I pull Tris into my arms, holding back tears. She stood up for me. She took that whip… for me. What have I ever done to deserve that from her? "Thank you," I whisper as she hugs me back.

"We got through it," she whispers in my ear.

No. I have been through this fear landscape so many times and this was an entirely different experience. That was all Tris. "You got me through it," I say and I pull back and search her eyes. She doesn't look at me with pity. She looks at me just how she did before, and I know now that I was right. She is worth trusting.

I have never kissed a girl before. Before Tris, I've never _really_ wanted to; I have maybe in an abstract sense, but never have I felt the desire I feel now to be so close to someone. I couldn't stop myself if I tried, and I don't hold back; I lean in and press my lips against hers. Instantly she kisses back, her hands tangling in my hair. Warmth and electricity surges through my entire body, all the way to the tips of my fingers and toes, and the world falls away around us. I'm not sure which of us pulls away first, or maybe it's all at the same time. I rest my forehead against hers and cup her cheek in my hand.

This feels... _right_. And for the first time, I don't feel so alone.


	12. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER ELEVEN**

 _ **Tobias**_

It's late enough now that no one is really out and about when we reach the Pit. I know Tris and I can't have any sort of public relationship yet, not while I am her instructor, but we're the only ones here. I take her hand, lacing my fingers with hers, and rub small circles in her palm with my thumb. I've never held a girl's hand before; all of this is brand new to me. I have been on a few dates when Zeke has forced me along, but I always managed to offend my date somehow very early on, so my experience with girls is non-existent. And that's okay. I'm glad I waited for the _right_ girl. Tris is special… she's different. A really good kind of different.

I lead Tris down into the chasm. Almost no one knows about this place, so I like to come here to think or to just get away from the noise and ruckus of Dauntless life. There are no cameras, and you can't really see my spot down by the water from up above. Zeke discovered this place shortly after our initiation and I have never wanted to share it with anyone before. Not until today.

We sit on a large flat rock not far above the rushing water, and I wrap my arm around her waist.

"Can I call you Tobias? When it's just us?" she asks, looking slightly nervous.

I have not wanted to hear my given name in a very long time. Growing up with Marcus, it was always more of an expletive than a name. But it isn't like that when Tris says it. Then suddenly it hits me… she said my name before she saw Marcus. She already knew who I was. How did she know that? Did she recognize me from Abnegation? If she did, wouldn't she have told me sooner?

I have to ask her about it. "It's nice to hear my name again. But only when we're alone," I reply, then bite my lip. "Uh, Tris?"

"Hmm," she hums in response. She has the most serene, peaceful look on her face, and I almost don't want to ask what I need to in case it might ruin it. But I need to know.

"In my fear landscape… you… you called me Tobias. Before you saw Marcus." Her eyes go wide and her mouth drops open. She's clearly startled… and I swear she looks like she feels guilty. "Tris, how did you know who I was?" I have to remind myself to breathe as she just sits there in tense silence.

"Shit," she mumbles under her breath. She's hiding something. I trusted her, and I really hope she will trust me with whatever it is. I don't want secrets between us.

"Tris," I sigh, "please just tell me. I just trusted you with information about myself that I have never volunteered to anyone. Ever. Whatever it is, you can tell me." My gaze is fixed on her beautiful face. The anticipation is killing me.

She closes her eyes for a moment and takes a few deep breaths before speaking. "Tobias… there is something I haven't told you, or anyone… I'm just afraid you won't believe me. I'm afraid I'll lose you when I just got you back. But I will take that risk, so please keep an open mind." _Just got me back?_ What is that supposed to mean?!

She takes a few more deep breaths- I'm starting to think she might be on the verge of a panic attack. I do my best to keep my expression understanding and encouraging.

"Crap, I don't even know how to start," she mumbles, but then she does start her story. "On the morning of the aptitude test," she begins, "I woke up from what I thought was a very vivid and bizarre dream. It… it was long and felt very real. My dream started that day, the morning of the aptitude test. In it… I did my aptitude test, I chose Dauntless and went through initiation. I ranked first. Then… then there was a war. A lot of things... happened. At the end I died, and Uriah did, too. At the very end of the dream, my mother and father, who had died of the beginning of the war, they told Uriah and me that we could go back and start over, fix everything." I'm confused. What does this have to do with me? And… wait, how was Uriah in her dream? Maybe they somehow knew one another before at school?

"Uriah found me the next day at school. We didn't even know each other before initiation. But he pulled me aside and he said, 'I guess that was real.' And then… then he called me Tris. I didn't ever make up that nickname until I landed in the net and you asked me my name, Tobias. Uriah dreamed the same thing, from his point of view. I mean, we weren't always together during the war and all that. But everything we each remember matches up."

I don't think I understand what she's trying to say. I must not. Because it sounds like she's saying that the dream was real or something, and that is impossible. "What does all this have to do with me?"

"We were together, Tobias. We were in love. Well, you _were_ in love with me. I am still in love with you. I came back for _you._ " I can't think. It's like my thoughts are just white noise. This doesn't make sense. This isn't possible. It isn't.

But then, as the white noise begins to quiet down and I can hear my thoughts again, my memory flashes to so many instances that have puzzled me. Tris and Uriah's close friendship, as if they had known each other for years- well, now she's telling me that they went through not only initiation, but also a war together. Tris's skill in training that I just could not explain. Her knowing my name, her ease in the fear landscape.

And then there was her mention of a war. Is that what Eric and Max have been up to?

"Tobias," Tris says, "you knew something was happening before it did, we just hadn't figured out what exactly, or moreso, how it would happen. You told me later that you had installed a mirroring program, I think you called it, on Max's computer. Have you done that already?" I stare at her with wide eyes. How did she know about that?! I haven't told _anyone_ I planned to spy on Max in that way.

"You- how… No, I plan to do that tomorrow while everyone is at Visiting Day." I swallow hard. "You… you knew. I haven't talked to anyone about that."

Tris smiles… or maybe it's more of a grimace. "No, _you_ told me. Later… when… when we were outside the fence."

Outside the fence. She's saying that we went outside the fence?! I flash back to the train a few days ago, when she was talking to Will and Christina. Will had asked what she thought was out there, and she had said… _Maybe something we could never even imagine._ But she knew. She knows. She knows what is out there.

"Look, Tobias, I'm sure that this is… a lot to take in. You're probably trying to decide whether I am mentally unstable for saying all this." She doesn't look at me. "If you need some time to think about it, if you need to talk to Uriah and see what he says, I understand. You're worth the wait."

This is real. She isn't crazy, whatever it was, a dream, a premonition… actual time travel, as ridiculous as that sounds… she has seen the future. This… is… real.

I swallow hard. "I… I believe you, Tris," I say slowly. "This is just… wow. And… you… you're in love with me?" She nods. That should scare me… but it doesn't. Instead, it makes me feel warm inside, a heat starting at my core and radiating out.

"You can't tell anyone. About any of this. I know you probably want to go ahead and see what's on Max's computer, I'm sure you need proof. I can help if you need it." It never occurred to me that I would be able to trust someone to help me with that. It would probably be much safer to do this with help.

We can worry about that tomorrow. I can't think about this any more. I just want to enjoy this beautiful girl who is, for reasons I cannot begin to fathom, in love with _me._

"Let me… absorb all this and we can talk about it later. I just want to be with you right now." I cup her face in my hands, the beginning of a smile on her lips as I pull her in for our second earth-shattering kiss.

I have wondered many times what it would be like to kiss a girl, but I never imagined I could be so consumed with another person. My arms wrap around her waist, pulling her closer to me, and she melts against me. Her tongue slides across my lower lip; I'm inexperienced, but somehow I react on instinct, welcoming her tongue into my mouth. One of her hands tugs gently at my short hair and the other traces the symbols tattooed down the middle of my back, making me shiver. I've never felt anything like I feel for this girl… it's indescribable.

She breaks the kiss, and it feels too soon. Before I can try to capture her lips again, I feel her warm, wet lips against a sensitive spot I didn't know was there, just behind my ear and I moan. "Tris…" I breathe.

"Tobias, I love you," she whispers, her voice thick with emotion. I kiss down her neck and notice a tattoo peeking out her shirt collar. Moving the fabric gently aside, I find three black birds flying along her collarbone and kiss each one slowly. "I love it when you do that," Tris whispers. If I wasn't already convinced that everything she told me was true, I would be now. I can feel the connection she has with me, the love she has for me, and I desperately want to feel everything for her that she feels for me.

I lean my forehead against hers, my eyes closed, breathing heavily. Without a word, I stand and pull her to her feet, and hand in hand, we walk back to her dormitory.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

Today is Visiting Day. Despite being out late with Tobias last night, I wake up early, buzzing with energy, my thoughts filled with _my Tobias._ I feel so happy and light, it's as if I could just float away. It's almost like when the Amity gave me too much peace serum, that's how happy I feel.

I quickly pull on my clothes and rush into the Dauntless-born dormitory. Soon I have located Uriah's bed, and I shake him awake quietly. He sputters and rubs his eyes. "Tris?" he mumbles. "It's too early. Why are you waking me up?"

"I need to talk to you! Come on," I whisper.

Uriah groans, but rolls out of bed, slipping on a pair of old sneakers and pulling on a t-shirt; he was sleeping in just a pair of basketball shorts.

He follows me up to the roof. Thankfully, no one is up here. I glance around for cameras, and finding none in this area, I sit down on the ground, pulling him with me. "Can you be a girl for a minute?"

"You want me to _be a girl_ for a minute?!" Uriah huffs. "This is what you woke me up for? To act like I am a _girl_?"

I whine. "Uriah, please? Come on, just… be all excited and happy for me here, okay?" He shrugs. "Four kissed me last night."

A huge grin breaks out on his face. "What?! No way! Oh my God, where? When?"

"You _can_ be a girl!" I giggle, and Uriah scowls, crossing his arms. "Yesterday, after my fight with Peter- which I won, by the way-" Uriah grins even wider and pumps his fist. "Yep, I beat the crap out of that butter knife wielding psycho!"

"Well done," Uriah says proudly. "Now, get to the part about Four."

"Okay! So… I stayed after talking to him, and I was about to leave, and he told me to meet him that night by the Chasm. When I got there, he took me up into his fear landscape. I protected him from Marcus, and he thanked me after and kissed me!" I don't think Uriah could grin any wider.

"I'm really happy for you, Tris." I know he's having a hard time with everything with Marlene, and I wish Tobias and I could be public so she'd know there's nothing going on with me and Uriah… but we can't.

"Okay but here's the thing, and this is why I had to talk to you right away…" I bite my lip. He might not be happy about me telling Tobias the truth. Uriah stares at me expectantly. "I accidentally called him Tobias during his third fear. I wouldn't have figured out who he was until the fourth one. He caught it, afterward, and asked about it."

Uriah closes his eyes. "You didn't tell him, right? Cause I don't want to end up Erudite's mental ward."

"I told him." Uriah does not open his eyes. He's frozen in place. "And he believes me." Well, that gets his eyes to shoot open, alright.

"What? How?"

I shrug. "I guess I just knew too many things that I couldn't know." I drop to a whisper that Uriah wouldn't be able to hear if I wasn't speaking inches from his ear. Just in case. "I think the biggest one was that today, he was planning on installing a mirroring program on Max's computer to find out what he and Eric are doing with Jeanine Matthews. He had told me about it when we were walking in the garden at the Bureau, how he got the information. I asked if he had done that yet."

"That was smart, Tris."

I shrug. There are any number of things I could have shared to prove myself, really. "So, anyway, he may ask you about it all. He understands now why we are such good friends. But, anyway… now we just need to get things back on track with you and Marlene."

Uriah sighs. "Yeah. I hope it isn't already too late."

* * *

In Dauntless, I'm not used to seeing anyone wearing any color but black, but today the Pit is spattered with blue and white- families of the Erudite- and Candor-turned-Dauntless. I _know_ she must be here, and my eyes scan the crowd until they finally land on the lone gray figure. I'm so happy to see my mother, but my heart sinks when I realize my father still did not come. I left on better terms than the first time, so I thought he might be here, but I don't see him.

I run to my mother, engulfing her in a hug. "I missed you, Mom," I whisper.

"Oh, I have missed you so much, too." We break apart and she holds me with one hand on each of my shoulders, looking me over with her sweet smile and her eyes twinkling. "Well, look at you! You look so strong and grown up and Dauntless, Beatrice!"

"I go by Tris now, actually," I say with a smile.

My mother nods. "Tris. It suits you. I see you've been fighting," she says, gently touching my jaw with three fingers- Peter must have landed a punch there at some point during our fight, though I don't remember it. She doesn't look worried, though.

I nod, "yes, and I won all my fights, mom!" She beams proudly. I see Four leaning against the railing to the Chasm. "Oh, Mom, there's one of my instructors!"

"He's handsome," Mom says when she spots him. I giggle and nod as we approach Tobias.

Hearing us approach, Tobias turns and smiles warmly at me, then my mother. "Hello, Mrs. Prior. I'm Tris's instructor. My name is Four," he says, shaking my mother's hand. "Your daughter is doing very well in training. You should be very proud. No one believed she would make it through the first stage, but there is no question that she will pass with flying colors, now."

"That's wonderful to hear," Mom says. "And please, call me Natalie." Tobias nods but looks a bit awkward. He scratches the back of his neck, like he always does when he's nervous, and I suppress a chuckle. "Four, is that a nickname?"

Tobias locks eyes with me. "Yes," he says, not looking at my mother. I try to ask him with my eyes, can I tell my mother who you are?

My mother tilts her head and stares at Tobias intently. "You look very familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?"

Tobias pauses. Last time, he made a rude comment, but this time is different. This time, he has told me his name, he has told me his secrets, he's maybe even falling in love with me. Everything is different. "Perhaps," he finally says. "But that is something to discuss another time. Tris, can I speak with you for just a moment?"

When we are away from other people, he says as quietly as he can with me still hearing him, "I would like to take you up on your offer to help me with that… project, today. Maybe Uriah, too, if you can find him. Can you meet me at my apartment when your mother leaves?" I nod. "Do you know where to go?" I giggle. "Yes, Tobias. I know where your apartment is."

He shakes his head. "I just can't wrap my head around all this."

"I know," I say softly, one hand resting on his arm, then I turn and walk away from him, back to my mother.

We meet Will and Cara- which goes much more smoothly than last time, as I don't try to pick a fight with her- and Christina, her mother Stephanie, and her sister Rose. Then, my mother pulls me into an abandoned hallway.

"You know your way around," I say. "You were Dauntless." Mom looks stunned. "I know what you want to talk to me about," I tell her in a whisper. "Yes, I am… what you're thinking." I'm afraid to say the word 'divergent' out loud, out in the open like this, no matter how abandoned the area is. "Mom… something is happening. You, all the Abnegation are in danger. We need to find a time to talk. But not here."

She nods. "Be careful in stage two, Beatrice."

"I know, Mom. I know what to do." She looks confused but lets it go.

"I can't visit Caleb," my mother says. "The Erudite won't allow any Abnegation into their compound, even for visiting day." I shake my head in disgust. "When you can, please go see Caleb. Tell him to look into the simulation serums." I hesitantly nod. I just can't tell her, not right now, what Caleb did- will do- to me. I can't bear to. He didn't exactly betray our parents, but that's only because they died before he had the chance.

"I will come when I can. Maybe Four will bring me some night. He can be trusted." I pause for a moment before adding, "I love Caleb too, but we can't bring him into this. He's an Erudite now and we can't take any chances."

She looks unsure, but doesn't challenge my statement. "I have to go," she tells me regretfully. "I love you, no matter what." She turns and walks down the hallway, then before she turns the corner, calls out, "have a piece of cake for me! The chocolate is to die for!" I gasp, shocked that I forgot.

"Wait, Mom!" I call out, and she pauses and turns back toward me. I pull out the box I've been carrying in my bag. "I got this for you. To share with Dad." Pressing the cake into her hands, I wrap mine around hers and the box. "It's my gift to you. I love you both, always." She smiles, kisses me on the forehead, and disappears down the dark hallway.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

Mom and I are supposed to meet in the dining hall this morning for Visiting Day. Really, I can see my family anytime, but Visiting Day is treated as sort of a family holiday, so she wanted to be sure to see each other anyway.

On my way, I scan the Pit, watching happy family reunions for the transfers whose families haven't disowned their children for leaving.

Tris is standing with her mother and Four, a shy smile playing at her lips. Four is scratching his neck nervously and I can't help chuckling.

I see Christina and Will near one another, with Will's sister, Cara, who went to the Bureau with us, and Christina's mom and little sister. I smile at the Erudite blue, Dauntless black and Candor black and white standing together and enjoying one another, despite their differences in ideology and faction.

Peter, with his innocent-looking smile, stands with a middle-aged Candor couple, not too far from me. I'm tempted to go tell his parents what a bastard their son turned out to be, but it doesn't matter. They won't be seeing him any more anyway, except maybe on Visiting Day each year. He already left them, it's not worth causing them pain by telling them what kind of person he really is.

Drew and Molly are moping off to the side. Their families didn't show up. Myra and Al are nowhere to be seen.

Then I see Edward. He stands with a boy of maybe nineteen or twenty, dressed in Erudite blue. I guess his folks didn't show up; that's probably his brother. My heart sinks when I see who is with them, smiling and chatting. Marlene.

A lump forms in my throat as Edward glances over his shoulder, then wraps an arm around Marlene's waist. I watch him lean in and say something to her, his lips just inches from her ear, and Mar throws her head back and laughs. She leans into his shoulder, glancing up at him here and there with a flirtatious smile. I feel sick, as if someone punched me in the gut. How can she not see that I am in love with her? And here she is, falling for Edward. I'm sure that Tris will try to stop Peter from stabbing Edward's eye tonight, but I almost hope she isn't able to prevent it. Of course I really don't want that to happen to Edward, but I really wouldn't mind if he left Dauntless today with Myra.

Dragging my feet, I make the way to Mom's apartment, rather than the dining hall, planning to lay on my old bed and do nothing all day. For the second time this week, I don't feel like eating cake any more.

* * *

Mom found me on her way to the dining hall and dragged me there to have that piece of cake. I didn't want to let on how low I was feeling to Mom, especially on a holiday, so I ate my cake and promised to meet her for dinner, along with Zeke and Shauna. Unfortunately, it didn't do anything for my mood. I was looking forward to going off to have a little pity party by myself. To my disappointment, that didn't happen either; Tris found me on my way back through the Pit and dragged me by one arm to Four's apartment.

The last thing I feel like doing is talking about all the crap we went through, (only to die, then lose the girl I love to Edward, of all people, when I got another chance.) I groan out loud.

"What?" Tris says sharply.

"I don't want to answer all his questions right now. I want to go drown my broken heart in vodka," I say. "Congratulations to you two, though. You guys belong to one another. Like, the universe says so."

Tris laughs. Then, more seriously, she says, "Uri, we'll find a way. It will work out. I know she's meant for you."

Four looks totally lost. "Who?"

I look at him. "I'm in love with Marlene. We were in love, you know...last time. And then she died, and then I died… and now it looks like she's falling for _Edward._ " I spit his name out like somebody forced brussels sprouts into my mouth. I _really_ hate brussels sprouts.

He frowns. "You'll get her back. You will," Tris says firmly. "So stop being such a pansycake!" Well, that brightens my spirits slightly- the word 'pansycake' is finally catching back on! I've been trying to bring it back for like two years!

"Anyway," Four says, "Tris brought you here because I would like to see what's on Max's computer. I have a mirroring program I would like you, Uriah, to install on his computer. I taped the lock this morning, I will be in the control room making sure no one sees any sign of you going in there, and Tris will stand lookout in the hall." Four looks back and forth at Tris and me, then shakes his head as if to clear it. "This whole thing is just so crazy," he says. "You remember the same things as her, Uriah?"

I nod. "I mean, we didn't follow the same course so it isn't like we have identical memories, but there's nothing inconsistent between the two so far. We both have the same version of how this war played out. And man, we gotta do some things differently this time. I can't watch Mar die again, or Lynn, or… shit… when you turned yourself in at Erudite? Oh my God, Four went freaking insane." I finally notice how wide Four's eyes are. "Sorry, man, I should just shut up. Give you a little info at a time, when we have time to discuss it." I scrub my face with my hands. "It was a lot."

Four nods slowly. Tris breaks the tension and gets us back on track with this program Four wants me to install. "Yes, it was, Uriah. Let's get back to spying on Max, shall we?" Four explains to me exactly what to do, which is all pretty simple, since Zeke has taught me a lot about computers over the last few years.

Fifteen minutes later, the Tris and I are ready to begin our mission. Before Four left, he had said, "Remember, just don't act like you're sneaking around. If you look confident, like you're supposed to be there, it's a lot less likely anyone will question you. Wait here for ten minutes, then trust that I've got the footage isolated and go."

"Ready?" Tris asks.

I shrug. "As I'll ever be." If I get caught in Max's office… I really don't know what the consequences will be. I would expect no less than being kicked out of Dauntless. We make our way to the elevator, chatting about nothing worth remembering. When we have reached the tenth floor and made our way down the hallway where the leaders' offices are, Tris bends down pretending to tie her shoe. "See you in a minute," I say quietly. I whistle and tap the flash drive in my pocket as I walk into Max's office as if it were my own.

As Four instructed, I don't touch the chair, I just lean over it. I type in the password that Four made me repeat about three dozen times- 084628- holding my breath. It works, and I sigh in relief. Following Four's instructions exactly, though I am positive I would have known how to do this without him, I put the flash drive into the USB port and begin to transfer the mirroring program he tricked Lauren into writing for him under the guise of wanting to prank my brother.

I'm almost done when I hear a voice coming from the hallway and freeze.

" _What are you doing out here, initiate?"_ Eric.


	13. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER TWELVE**

 _ **Tris**_

"What are you doing out here, initiate?" I slowly turn my head at the sound of Eric's voice. Act confident, I remind myself.

"I got lost." Eric is standing close to me. Too close. My heart pounds, both because the invasion of my personal space, and in fear that Uriah won't hear us talking and might come out of that office.

I clear my throat to stall for time as my mind races, searching for a believable excuse. "I was looking for the control room. Zeke thought Four might be there and I had a question about rankings." What question do I supposedly need to ask? I have absolutely no idea.

Eric's hand runs up and down my arm and I could swear he is undressing me with his eyes. I shudder, and his smirk widens; I think he mistook my reaction for a shiver of pleasure. The thought of being with Eric makes me taste bile. _Please don't kiss me_ , I plead silently over and over.

"Maybe I can help you." His voice is smooth and he is leaning in. Any second his lips could be on mine. I duck out under his arm and- hoping my disgust doesn't show- slip my hand into his, leading him down the hall.

"I just wondered what time the rankings will be shared with us? I'm a little nervous." I'm not nervous. Not all. Well, not about my rank, anyway. This situation? Yes. Yes, this situation has me very… very… nervous.

Eric falls into step beside me, apparently not suspecting a thing. "Ah. Seven o'clock in the dormitory." We round the corner, and he eyes me. "You could have asked your fellow initiates if you didn't remember." I very faintly, only because I am listening so hard for it, hear Uriah's footsteps moving away from us down the other hallway, toward the stairwell. "One might think," he says, pressing his hand to the small of my back as we slowly make our way toward the elevator, "that your question was just an excuse." I force myself to breathe evenly, but my palms are sweating. It's a good thing that he let go of my hand to touch my back.

"Maybe," he continues, leaning closer, "you were looking… for me." The faint smell of alcohol is on his breath. _Really, already? In the middle of the afternoon, Eric?_ My stomach churns as his lips move in, just inches from mine.

The sound of the elevator doors opening is my saving grace; Eric steps back, away from me. We can see the elevator from here, so it only takes a glance to discover that Max has come upon us on his way to his office. "Eric," he says firmly, "I need a word." Max gives me a hard look.

"Thank you for your help, Eric," I say politely, forcing a smile. "I can find my way back from here." I don't breathe again until I am safely in the elevator.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

My heart pounds and I casually glance back at my supervisor, Gus, as I isolate the footage for the leaders' hall and offices. I flip between various cameras around the Dauntless compound, going back to Max's office and the hallway Tris is loitering in when I know Gus is busy looking elsewhere.

At first, everything is going great. Tris and Uriah don't look nervous or suspicious, and Uriah has made it into Max's office and inserted the flash drive. I switch to a view of the Pit, then the dining hall, and see Gus leaving the room, so I switch back to the hall Tris is waiting in.

My stomach clenches immediately. There she stands… with Eric. There's no sound, but I can see the entire exchange play out. I grip the armrests on my chair so tightly my knuckles turn white as Eric moves closer to her and runs his fingers up and down her arm. She visibly shudders, but it doesn't deter him any. I can't see his face, but he keeps moving closer. My fists clench.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding when Tris manages to duck out, under his arm… but that relief is short lived when she takes his hand and begins to lead him away. _She won't do anything with Eric,_ I remind myself. _She's just playing along so that Uri can get out of there._ I keep telling myself that, and I know it's true, but it does nothing to remedy the sick feeling in my stomach.

They round the corner, and I search for the camera angle that will show me what's next just as I see Uriah glide out of the leaders' hallway toward the stairwell. Thank God. That's one less thing to worry about, now.

The view from the camera I have been searching for pops up on my screen after I type a few commands, and I see Eric's hand on the small of Tris's back, see him lean in so close his lips almost touch hers. I grip the arms of my chair once again, to keep me grounded here; if I weren't holding on so tight, I am positive I would be in that elevator already, heading up there to punch Eric in the nose for moving in on _my_ Tris.

The door to the control room opens, and I try to look casual as I switch to another screen, thinking Gus is back. When I turn, I see Uriah giving me a discreet thumbs up. I motion him to come over to me. "I might need you to go help Tris," I tell him as I pull the hallway back up.

Uriah sighs in relief right along with me as we watch Max and Eric walk together around the corner, the elevator doors closing with Tris inside. I swallow the lump in my throat. "It looked like he was going to kiss her," I whisper. "You don't think she kissed him, do you?" I look at Uriah, my eyes pleading.

" _She_ certainly didn't kiss _him,_ I can promise you that.But if _he_ kissed _her_ ," Uriah says, "I'll bet she's on her way to the dormitory to wash her mouth out about a dozen times." I smile slightly as I release the footage, just as Gus walks in. I shut down my computer and turn off the monitor as Uriah says hello to Gus and makes small talk; his sister is in Uriah's initiate class, so I leave Uriah behind, chatting with Gus, and return to my apartment, forcing myself not to track down Tris and interrogate her. I need to trust her. She loves me. I can trust her.

* * *

I lay on my bed groaning in frustration at the jealous thoughts racing through my mind. All I can think about is that almost-kiss I saw on the screen between Tris and Eric. It has made me realize that I don't know whether I am the only guy she has ever kissed. I know she has more experience than I do- though I don't know how much- from being with me, as weird as that is to think about, but beyond that, I have no idea. _Maybe I'll ask her,_ I think just as I hear a knock at the door. I groan. I don't want to see anyone right now.

I change my mind when I open the door to find Tris smiling at me. "So, we pulled it off?" she says after she comes in and shuts the door behind her. She grabs a water bottle from the fridge, takes off her shoes, and sits down cross-legged on my bed. I shake my head to clear it; it's so weird how comfortable she is in my apartment, though I realize she has probably spent a fair amount of time here.

I nod and chew on my lip. "Is everything alright?" Tris asks, her eyes filled with worry.

"I saw you on the screen with Eric," I admit. "But I had to go to another screen right when he looked like he was going to kiss you." I pause, then finally look at her. "Did he?"

Tris smiles. "No, Max inadvertently saved me, thank God." I sit down next to her on the bed and pull her into my lap. "You're the only one I have ever kissed, and I want to keep it that way." Well, that answers that question. I grin. Tris glances at her watch. "Thirty minutes till the rankings," she reminds me. "Should I be worried?" By the look on her face, it's safe to assume she knows the answer to that question.

I laugh. "No, you definitely should not be worried. You were incredible." I pause, looking at her thoughtfully. It's very strange to imagine that she has been through all of this before, and it probably went differently the first time. "How did stage one go the first time around?"

"Well," she begins, "I ranked sixth." She goes on to tell me all about losing- badly- in her first fight, with Peter; her fight with Myra, which she won but felt no pride over- can't blame her there; and her final fight with Molly, which sounds like it went very similarly to her fight yesterday against Peter.

"Did I throw knives at you?" I ask.

She giggles. "Yes, you did. But I thought you were taunting me the whole time. I didn't understand what you were trying to do. So, I yelled at you and stormed off. We also climbed the ferris wheel during capture the flag, and it was a special moment, but this time was better."

"Why?" I kind of like hearing her memories of us.

"Because this time you told me that you like to be with me. I couldn't stop smiling after that." I smile back thinking about that night. Tris's expression turns serious. "Tobias, something bad is going to happen tonight." I wait for her to continue. "Edward ranks first, right? The first time around, Peter and Drew stabbed him in the eye with a butter knife while everyone was sleeping. I think it was around midnight." She pauses. "Edward loses his eye and leaves with Myra to the factionless, where he will become your mother's second in command. Peter and Drew don't get caught and have no consequences."

She knows about my mother? _Of course she does._ "What is my mother's involvement in… everything."

Tris sighs. "I will tell you all that, I promise. But right now, the rankings are in twenty minutes and we need to save Edward tonight."

* * *

I enter the dormitory with the large chalkboard from the training room and a piece of chalk, making only brief eye contact with Tris as I walk past. We don't want to give anything away. She left my apartment a few minutes before I did so that we wouldn't be seen together.

I write down the rankings in order, the chalkboard facing away from the nine initiates, as I explain how they were determined. "After the first round of fights, we ranked you according to your skill level. The number of points you earn depends on your skill level and the skill level of the person you beat. You earn more points for improving and more points for beating someone of a high skill level. I don't reward preying on the weak. That is cowardice."

I look at Peter, remembering his fight with Myra. He teased her, had her down in no time, then continued to kick her even though he had won. It was disgusting.

"Stage two of training is weighted more heavily than stage one, because it is more closely tied to overcoming cowardice. That said, it is extremely difficult to rank high at the end of initiation if you rank low in stage one." Tris smiles at me and I try to hold back the smile trying to break free in return. "We will announce the cuts tomorrow. The fact that you are transfers and the Dauntless-born initiates are not will not be taken into consideration. Four of you could be factionless and none of them. Or four of them and none of you, or any combination thereof. That said, here are your ranks."

As I finish my speech, I turn the board and hang it on a hook on the wall, then step back so everyone can see:

1\. Edward  
2\. Tris  
3\. Peter  
4\. Will  
5\. Molly  
6\. Christina  
7\. Drew  
8\. Al  
9\. Myra

I want to pull Tris into my arms and spin her around to congratulate her, or at least smile at her and give her a kiss, but I have to hold back. I can't believe how hard this is. She grins at me, though, before turning to Christina and Will with a squeal, jumping up and down. Will hugs her in congratulations and I take two steps toward him before I redirect myself out the door of the dormitory. I have no idea how I will survive the next two weeks pretending, at least in front of other people, that I'm not falling in love with her.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

I lay on my lumpy cot mattress in the dormitory, listening to the sound of nine people breathing, though I am fairly certain only five are asleep. Besides myself- Peter, Drew and Edward should all be awake.

I pulled Edward aside a little while after the rankings.

 _"I didn't like the look Peter had in his eye after the rankings were revealed," I said to Edward. "And he's psycho. He stole all my clothes and my towel the other day, and I wasn't even such a threat to him yet. Edward, I think he'll stop at nothing to rank first. Try to stay awake tonight for a while, stay on guard. I will, too. I just have a really bad feeling about this."_

 _I think Edward believed I was mostly paranoid, but he could see that I wasn't kidding around. "Okay, Tris. I'll be careful," he said and smiled at me. "Thanks for watching out for me."_

 _I never really got to know Edward the first time around- he was always with Myra, then he was gone too soon. He seems like a nice guy, though._

I struggle to keep my eyes open. The dormitory is very dark at night, but my eyes have adjusted somewhat to the light. I am prepared to fight to defend myself, and if no one comes for me directly, run to turn on the light immediately. Tobias plans to be waiting in the wings to help catch Peter and Drew.

A unidentified sound brings me to full attention. I hold my clenched fists in front of my face in case they attack me, too- Peter was ranked second before, a position I personally, and literally, knocked him out of yesterday. I hear scuffling feet then a yell; I dart toward the lightswitch but someone pushes me down and I land hard on my shins and forearms. Edward screams, but it isn't the terrifying scream that haunted me for weeks afterward last time. Someone finally turns on the lights as I hop up and try to make my way there, so I immediately hurry to Edward, glancing at the door as I do.

Where is Tobias? Why isn't he here!?

There's been a butter knife stabbing, alright, but it isn't in Edward's eye. The knife sticks out of his forearm and I see him rip it out with another scream. I don't want to think about what kind of force it would require to make a butter knife embed itself in an arm like that.

"What happened?" I ask frantically.

"They tried to go for my eye!" Edward yells. "Thanks to your warning, Tris, I was awake and blocked them. It went into my arm instead."

Everyone is awake and getting out of their beds now; Peter and Drew are making a show of looking sleepy. I can't believe Peter got away with this _again_! I glare at him, but he pretends not to notice.

"Can you get yourself to the infirmary, Edward?" I ask him. "I'll find Four."

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

Tris thought that the attack she remembered had happened around twelve or twelve-thirty. I wish she could have given me a more specific time, but I'm sure that checking the clock wouldn't be the first thing I would do right after a fellow initiate had been stabbed in the eye, either. Knowing Tris, she was probably the one focused on helping him.

I check my watch as I walk slowly down the hall toward the initiate dormitory. It reads 12:09. I sigh. It could be a while yet.

I let out a string of expletives in my mind as Eric rounds a corner. "Four," he says with a smug smirk on his face when he reaches me, putting an arm around my shoulder in mock friendship, dragging me away from the dormitories with him. "I saw Little Stiff today." Oh, how original. I suppose that makes me 'Big Stiff'. I roll my eyes. "She was looking for you, but I… helped her." I know what he's trying to do, and it isn't going to work. Tris loves me and recoils from him every time she sees him. We already talked about this; he can't make me jealous.

"What brings you around here this time of night?" he asks when I don't respond, eyeing me suspiciously.

I shrug as we round a corner, then I stop, not wanting to go any further from the dorms. He stops as well and faces me. "Not that it's any of your business, Eric; if you must know, just a bout of insomnia. Walking helps sometimes."

"Ha! Yes, I suppose nightmares keep you awake, don't they." I clench my jaw. He has no right to talk about anything that is in my fear landscape. I'm sure he's seen it; he has access to all the recordings as a leader.

The conversation is cut short when I faintly hear a scream. I try to break away in a run, but Eric grabs my arm. "What's the rush, Four?"

"I am responsible for those initiates, Eric! Someone is obviously hurt."

He shrugs. "They can take care of themselves. There is no need to go running like an overprotective mother worrying about her baby. Let someone come to you."

"There's something seriously wrong with you, Eric," I spit at him as I stomp away. He lets out a cackle as he watches me head toward the scream.

"You know," Eric says, and I turn and walk backwards so I can see him. He begins slowly following me. "I wouldn't mind seeing Little Stiff… maybe picking up where we left off this afternoon. I'll come with you."

I roll my eyes and put on my emotionless 'Instructor Four' mask to hide the anxiety pounding through me at his mention of Tris.

Down the hall I spot Tris rushing out of the dormitory. She sees me and looks angry, and I'm pretty sure she's about to yell at me until she notices Eric behind me. Edward soon emerges from the same door, blood dripping from a wound on his arm. Thankfully there is no knife in his eye.

"What happened?" Eric barks, as if he ever actually intended to do his job.

Edward answers, "Someone stabbed me with a damn butter knife. They were going for my eye but I was awake and blocked with my arm." He holds up his arm, which is still bleeding steadily. "I think it was Peter but I don't have any proof."

"Four," Eric barks, "take Edward to the infirmary. Tris, you should get back to bed." Eric places his hand at the small of Tris's back to lead her back to the dormitory, and she looks at me with pleading eyes.

"Uh, Edward," Tris says, her eyes brightening like she just had an idea. She jerks her head toward the dormitory, and I look and see Myra leaning against the doorway staring sadly after Edward. "Do you want me to get Myra to come with you?"

Edward glances at me and then back at Tris. "No, but could you get Marlene?"

Tris frowns slightly, but nods her head. "Sure, Edward, Marlene and I will meet you at the infirmary." She turns to Eric. "Thanks so much, Eric, but I'd like to concentrate on making sure my friend Edward is okay. We don't have training tomorrow, so I will be fine." She doesn't wait for any sort of response before marching to the Dauntless-born dormitory, leaving Eric scowling behind her.

I smirk. "Come on, Edward, lets go get this looked at."

When we are well out of Eric's earshot, Edward turns to me. "I would have lost my eye if Tris hadn't warned me to watch out, Four. I owe her big time."

I nod. "She's a good one. Smart." Edward nods, and I look him in the eye. "She's in as much danger as you are- she's smaller, she ranked above Peter, and Peter hated her to begin with just because of where she came from. Watch out for her, make sure she stays safe. That's the best way to thank her."

"I will," he promises as we enter the infirmary.


	14. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER THIRTEEN**

 _ **Tris**_

"Marlene," I whisper, trying to shake her awake. I knew her bed was next to Uriah's, so it wasn't too hard to find her, even with it so dark. I whisper louder. "Mar!"

"Hmm?" she hums sleepily.

From the next bed over I hear Uriah: "Tris? Is that you?"

"Yes, Uri, it's me," I whisper. I turn back to Marlene. "Marlene, Edward got hurt. He wanted you to come." Marlene shoots upright. My eyes have adjusted to the dark now, so when I turn I can see Uriah, though not with much detail.

"Did Peter…?" Uriah questions.

I shake my head. "No. Well, yes… but just his arm." Uriah nods and lays back down as Marlene pulls on shoes and we make our way to the hallway.

"Okay," Marlene says, her voice thick with sleep, but a little shaky. "Tell me what happened."

I explain about Peter's sick and bizarre effort to eliminate the competition by attacking others with butter knives, and Marlene gasps when I tell her he almost got Edward's eye. "If he had been asleep…" Marlene says. I just nod.

I'm not sure whether it's better to call attention to the elephant that never leaves the room or to ignore it, but I hate that Uriah is hurting so much, so I decide to try and address what is constantly eating at me.

"Marlene," I say cautiously, "I hope we can consider each other friends." I see the hint of a frown flicker across her face, but she masks it quickly. "If I've done something to upset you, I hope you'd tell me so we can work it out. Uriah is my good friend, and I don't intend to intrude on your friendship with him; I really would like to be your friend." Marlene nods, but it's not convincing. I sigh. "Anyway… I'm not sure what's going on with you and Edward… but… don't forget about Uriah. He cares a lot about you, Mar."

Marlene snorts and glares at me. "What, so he can hook up with some transfer but I can't?"

So she definitely _does_ think there is something between Uri and me. I run my hand through my tangled blonde hair as I try to sort out how much I can and can't say. "Uriah and I are only friends," I say carefully. "I-"

"Please," Marlene says and rolls her eyes. "I can see what is going on with you two. I'm not blind. But apparently you are well aware of _my_ feelings for him and moved in on him anyway. Don't pretend you want to be my friend."

I stand, stunned, outside the door to the infirmary for a moment as Marlene pushes her way in. After spending a minute trying to regain my composure, I enter the infirmary and sit down in one of the waiting room chairs. I want to see Tobias before I go, and I don't have to wait long; I've only been sitting for five or ten minutes when he sees me on his way out of the infirmary.

"Tris, I didn't know you were waiting out here." He holds out his hand to pull me up. We're in public, and I know that's why he drops it quickly, but I still miss his warmth.

"How is Edward?" I ask as we leave the infirmary and Tobias leads me, his hand on the small of my back, to a little alcove off of an abandoned hallway.

Tobias shrugs. "He's fine, just needed a few stitches. More shaken up at what _could_ have happened, than anything. He credits you with his still having two working eyes."

I shrug. Wouldn't anyone have done the same, had they known? Edward doesn't owe me anything.

"I should get back to the dormitory." I really want to just go back to Tobias's apartment with him, but I am not about to suggest it before he does, and I really should be careful not to give the other initiates reason to suspect anything. We still have nearly two weeks of initiation to go. Two torturous weeks of keeping our relationship under wraps.

Tobias sighs, pulling me against him. "Be safe," Tobias whispers against my hair before cupping my chin in his palm and leaning in for a slow, tender kiss.

I lean against him for a few more moments, inhaling his scent of honey and mint and something distinctly him, committing it to memory so that it can carry me through until we can be alone again. "Goodnight, Tobias," I say softly as I pull away.

"Goodnight," he whispers as he watches me walk away.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

The first time I went through initiation, one of my most favorite days was today: ziplining. As a bonus, it was also the first time I invited Tris to hang out with Marlene, Lynn and me. Well, today, I did go ziplining, and I did bring Tris along… but Tris spent the whole time uncomfortably talking with Zeke, Shauna, and Shauna's cousin, Jason, that she (unsuccessfully) attempted to set Tris up with. The bigger problem for me, though, was that Marlene invited Edward.

Tris was still the first initiate to go down the zip line, right after Shauna's cousin, Jason, who I'm sure was eager to catch her at the bottom. I was behind Tris, then in line behind me was Marlene, then Edward. He spent the whole time waiting with his arm draped casually over her shoulders, occasionally whispering things that made her giggle like a schoolgirl on peace serum. I enjoyed my trip down the line, most of all because it gave me a chance to get away from the girl I love and the guy who stole her away from me. I felt better when I got to the bottom.

My renewed happiness was short lived. When Marlene came into focus on her flight down the zip line, I saw that she and Edward had chosen to ride _together_ in one of the two-person slings. Tris looked at me empathetically and squeezed my arm, but if anything, that just made me feel worse. She and Four have their relationship all on track, but me? No, I seem to get further away from my happily ever after with Marlene each passing day. Tris told me a little about her conversation with Marlene last night, and I feel like she won't ever believe that Tris and I have never been more than friends. After Marlene's response to Tris insisting that we're only friends, I don't have the nerve to bring the subject up with Mar.

So now, here I sit, still feeling sad and dejected, at a table with Lynn, Christina, Will… and Tris, Marlene, and Edward. While Edward is the friendliest I've seen him toward Tris, Marlene looks at Tris like she's gum stuck to the bottom of Mar's shoe.

"So, you two were looking awfully close going down that zip line," Lynn teases Marlene. I clench my jaw and violently pierce a carrot with my fork. When I look up, Edward seems to be studying me. What, does he just get some sick joy out of my jealousy or something? What did I ever do to him?

Marlene giggles. "It sure was a lot of fun! Wasn't it, Eddie?" Oh, so now she has special pet names for him, does she? Great, just great. Then Marlene turns her attention to Tris. "When we made it to the bottom of the zipline, I noticed that Tris and Uriah looked pretty close, too. And I saw Jason following you around, too. You sure have your way with the Dauntless boys, don't you, Tris?" _If we could just make this dinner a little more awkward, my day would be perfect,_ I think sarcastically as I roll my eyes.

"I'm really not sure what you're talking about, Marlene." Tris's expression is blank, but her cheeks are red and from my seat next to her, I can feel the tension radiating off of her. "Uriah is my friend, and I did not ask to be set up with Jason. I'm not interested, anyway."

Marlene rolls her eyes and Tris glares. Marlene turns her attention back to Edward and whispers something in his ear. He smirks.

I can't watch this any longer. I push back my chair, gathering up my tray. Tris follows me. "Uriah, don't let them get to you. Stay."

I shake my head. "I can't watch that any more."

"Do you want me to come with you?" she asks, sounding unsure.

"No. I just need some time to think. Alone." I leave her standing there and don't look back.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

Tris looks frustrated and exhausted when she enters my apartment. "Did you discover that zip lining is as terrifying as I think it looks?" I ask, completely serious. Apparently she thinks it's a joke, though, because she grins and laughs.

"I guess you don't know that I went last time, too." How did she go last time? I was surprised she was going today, because it's usually only for the Dauntless-born initiates who have older siblings here. "And I loved it, both times. It's amazing. I know how much you hate heights, but you really should try it sometime." _Never going to happen._ And I give her a look that reflects that thought, to which she rolls her eyes.

"You look like you've had a rough day," I observe. "What happened?"

Again, she sits herself down on my bed as if it's her own. And again, I realize that it's possible that it was actually her bed too. I just haven't caught up. I wonder what else I haven't caught up on? I haven't yet worked up the nerve to ask about our former… or future, depending how you look at it... sex life. If there even _was_ one yet.

"Well," she says, as I sit down next to her and pull her against me, both our backs leaning against the wall. " _Your_ friends used ziplining to try and set me up with some guy named Jason, which was really… uncomfortable." They went ahead with that? My fist involuntarily clenches at the thought of some other guy hitting on Tris. "You should probably tell Zeke and Shauna about us, by the way. I, at least, definitely trust them." She looks up at me through her eyelashes.

I shrug and kiss her temple. "I'll think about it." And I will. I'm just not a very trusting person.

Tris nods, satisfied with my answer. "Then I came back to the dormitory," she continues, "and saw Al and Myra's empty bunks and… I don't know, all this didn't happen last time, Myra and Edward breaking up and whatever he and Marlene going on… and I feel bad for Uriah about that… and then Al…"

"What about Al?" I'm confused. Tris did stand up for Al with the knife throwing, but otherwise she never seemed to care much for him.

"He was my friend, the first time," she says quietly. "Since Edward left, Al didn't get kicked off after stage one. So my actions there got him kicked out of Dauntless, but that's really okay, he wouldn't have made it at the end anyway. At least he's alive this time."

 _At least he's alive?_ "What happened last time?"

"When I ranked first at the end of stage two- by a lot, I might add… I am very good at the simulations- Al, Peter and Drew attacked me. They tried to throw me in the Chasm."

My eyes close, though I don't recall making the conscious decision to do so. I was shocked enough at the attempt to take out Edward's eye… but they seriously tried to _kill_ her? This horrible ache is in my gut and after a moment I recognize it… it's dread. Panic. Fear.

"You saved me, Tobias. I was hanging off the rail, with bruises and a head injury when you found them trying to kill me." She swallows hard. "Anyway… Al asked me to forgive him, and I refused to. So he jumped into the Chasm. I feel like I made that right this time, I guess, but I still feel some of that guilt when I look at that empty bed."

"I remember a lesson your father gave once," I say. "He said to 'let the guilt remind us to do better next time.' Sounds like you did that." Tris smiles slightly and nods. I'm thankful that I haven't had to see her in that kind of danger, but I hate that these important moments in our relationship… they didn't happen to me at all, yet. The more important thing right now, though is keeping her alive. I feel sick at the thought of her going back to that dormitory to sleep, but I know we don't have another option; someone would wonder where she was and eventually follow her, if she spent the next two weeks sleeping elsewhere.

"And then," she continues, getting back to her original explanation about her bad day, "dinner was extremely awkward because of Marlene and Edward, then Mar was making remarks essentially implying that I was a slut. Uriah stormed off when he'd had enough of watching her and Edward. I got out of there as fast as I could after that." She looks up at me with those doe eyes that make me melt. "But right now I want to forget about all that."

Tris leans against me and runs her fingers up and down my spine as she places a gentle kiss where my jaw meets my neck. God, that feels good. I can't get enough of this girl, and automatically my eyes close and I hum in approval. "Can I see your tattoo?" she whispers. "Would you tell me about it?"

I pull back and stare at her, confused. "Don't you already know about it?" I'm sure that the… other me (that is so weird) must have showed them to her.

"Mmhmmm," she hums, "but they're a part of you, and I want _you_ to share that with me." I can't help smiling- she seems to understand, without me saying anything, just what I have been feeling about her having all of these memories and experiences that I don't share. My fingers find the hem of my shirt, and I quickly pull it over my head, turning my back to her.

Tris slowly traces the lines of my tattoos, starting with the Amity tree at the bottom, slowly making her way up to the Candor scales, the Erudite eye, Abnegation hands, and finally, just at the base of my neck, the Dauntless flames. Her feather-light touch slowly relaxes my tense muscles and sends involuntary shivers through me.

"We are told to choose one thing we believe, one thing we want to be. I think we've got it all wrong," I tell her softly. "We put down the virtues the other factions value, when we should be celebrating them all. I don't want to just be one thing." I pause and close my eyes, letting myself get lost for a moment in the way her nails tickle my skin. "I want to be brave _and_ selfless, _and_ intelligent, _and_ honest _and_ kind. I struggle the most with kindness."

Tris leans down low and kisses her way up my back, one kiss on each symbol, before turning me toward her and kissing me softly on the lips. "And that's what makes you so special," she whispers.

"There's something you should know that I don't think I've told you," Tris says, leaning away and sitting back, looking at me. "I'm divergent." My pulse immediately quickens, and my palms sweat. I should have known. I don't know why I didn't realize. I already knew she was in danger, from Peter, from Eric, and from everything she has told me is going to happen, but I didn't know I had to worry about this, too. "Tobias, don't worry about that right now, I know how to hide it in the fear sims. You won't have to delete any footage to hide me, and I played the part in my aptitude test, too. I got a Dauntless result." I nod, swallowing thickly, but I can tell from her face that she sees how panicked I am.

"But I should probably also tell you," she continues, looking down at her hands, "that Jeanine took… a great interest in me, during the last war." She pauses for a long time before finally looking at me, and I'm grateful for the time to calm my heart rate and breathing. My pulse is so loud in my ears that I'm not sure I'd hear what she said next if she spoke too soon. As always, Tris seems to know me better than I know myself, and she look at me and keeps waiting to speak, until it's just the right time for me to listen again. "I had aptitude for three factions in my first aptitude test. Abnegation, Dauntless, and Erudite."

"Three?!" I exclaim. I have never heard of someone getting three aptitudes. Though when I think about it, I can clearly see all three aptitudes. Selflessness has been more than evident when she has stuck up for Christina, for Al, who she doesn't even like, and when she protected me from Marcus in my fear landscape. Bravery… I don't even need to explain that one. And her incredible mind for strategy proved her intelligence during capture the flag.

Tris just nods slowly. I can tell she has more to say about the subject, but she doesn't continue; she simply leans against me, and I pull her down to lay on the bed, her head on my chest. All I can think about as we lay together in comfortable silence is how badly I wish I knew her inside and out, the way she knows me.

* * *

When Tris has gone back to the dormitory and I am again alone in my apartment, she still dominates every corner of my mind. When I am with her, I feel so warm and… whole. It hits me like a freight train: it's happiness. That's what I feel when I am with her. It's such an unfamiliar emotion that I didn't recognize it at first.

I had planned to leave Dauntless once I figured out what Max and Eric were up to. When my mother contacted me shortly after my initiation ended, she asked me to join her in the factionless. After some thought, I had told her I would someday, but not yet; more recently, I promised her that I would be joining her soon.

Dauntless had not turned out to be what I expected. Of course, I didn't join Dauntless so much because I agreed with their ideology as because I needed to escape Marcus, and I wanted to hit him where it would hurt most. He hates the Dauntless. However, if Dauntless were what it was meant to be, if it held true to the values touted in the Dauntless Manifesto, I could support it, I could throw myself into it fully. But that isn't what Dauntless has become, so I was going to leave it behind.

Now, I know I can't. With Tris here, I am happy. I am whole. I can be all those things I have inked on my back, because she gives me the strength and desire to be a better version of myself. To even accept myself again as Tobias, instead of the emotionless Dauntless prodigy, Four.

I fumble through a kitchen drawer for a pen and paper. I write the note quickly and fold it, stuffing it in my pocket before running out to the train tracks.

When I reach the Factionless sector, I head toward the building I know my mother typically resides in. A few blocks away I find someone I am familiar with, someone who I know can get the message to her. "Can you please get this note to Evelyn?" I ask Edgar.

He nods. "Sure, Four." And without another word he disappears into an alleyway with the note in his hand.

Even thinking of how disappointed my mother will be once she reads the note, I still can't wipe the ghost of a smile off of my face as I think of Tris, and the note that I just sent to my mother because of her.

 _E-  
I am going to stay here at Dauntless. I am happy here- really, really happy. I hope you understand.  
_ _-T_


	15. Chapter 14

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN**

 _ **Tobias**_

I have never enjoyed watching fear simulations, but they usually don't really get to me too badly. Uriah's first sim, however, leaves me with a sense of dread. He comes out of the simulation, panting and crying. I _know_ this isn't just a symbolic fear. This is something that really happened… and will happen again, if we don't change the events that will lead up to it.

I just watched Marlene's death.

I am a little confused about what exactly happened, but I know that it's probably an actual memory, at least mostly. Three young Dauntless- Marlene, Shauna's little brother Hector, and a young girl with green hair- stood on the roof. Their faces were blank, and their eyes looked dead. Marlene was the one who spoke. "I have a message for the Divergent." Her voice was monotone, nothing like the Marlene I have known for the past two years. Nothing like the Marlene that Uriah is in love with, the Marlene who is so perky and flirty I can barely tolerate her. "This is not a negotiation. It is a warning. Every two days until one of you delivers yourself to Erudite headquarters… this will happen again."

Uriah was desperately trying to reach her, but an invisible wall stopped him. I felt helpless watching as he kicked and pounded his fists on the glass. The words Marlene so emotionlessly just spoke echoed in my mind, along with Uriah's mention the other day about how upset I apparently was when Tris went to Erudite. _This is why. She turned herself in, didn't she?_

In unison, the three dead-eyed young Dauntless stepped off the roof. Uriah screamed out as Marlene fell to her death. But only Marlene. Tris was there holding Hector in place, as Christina was nearby holding onto the little green-haired girl.

I can't shake the sick feeling in my stomach as I sit stunned, unable to speak or move to offer Uriah any sort of comfort. I hear my own voice after a moment, but I don't even feel like it came from my mouth, or that the words were formed by my own mind. "It was just a simulation. It wasn't real."

Uriah looks at me, his eyes turning from heartbroken to angry. "But it _is_ real. It _was_ real," he whispers.

I grab hold of his arm and pull him out the back door. I can't think straight, but somewhere it is registering that this is what Uriah and Tris _actually_ went through… and I know there had to be so much more than just this. Uriah has every reason to truly fear all of it happening again. "Were you there when it happened?" I ask.

"No," he sniffles, "but I saw the security footage afterward. Tris and Christina were there. Just like what you saw."

I know the answer, but I ask anyway. My voice shakes. "Is this why Tris turned herself over to Erudite?"

Uriah nods. "She's too damn selfless. She promised you she wouldn't, then she went anyway. She barely made it out alive."

The scene plays over and over in my mind. It finally hits me. "Were they in a simulation?" Uriah only nods, tears still streaming down his face. "Go back to the dorm," I order him. "I'll call Tris next, and when she's through I'll send her to find you, okay?" He nods and mumbles a thank you before turning and shuffling away, then pauses and turns back to me.

"I know you have to delete that. With… what Marlene said in it." Shit, he's right. I am not sure whether Uriah is divergent, but he certainly doesn't need the attention on him either way. "Can you save it? On a flash drive or something, before you delete it? I might need to show it to Marlene. I'll need to tell her eventually."

I nod. "Yeah, of course, Uriah." I know first hand just how crazy the whole story sounds and just how hard it might be for Marlene to believe it.

When I return to the simulation room, I dig my keys out of my pocket; I have a flash drive right there on my keychain. I work quickly, finding the recording of Uriah's fear simulation and as soon as it has finished transferring, I pull out the flash drive and shove my keys back in my pocket before deleting the recording, then double checking to be sure it's completely removed from our faction's network before moving on to the next initiate.

"Tris," I call out the door to the room, praying that her sim isn't anything like what I just had to watch.

She smiles at me before sitting in the chair without hesitation. When she sees my face, her forehead wrinkles with concern. "Was it bad?" she asks. "His sim?"

I just look at her until I finally say, "you need to go find him in the dorms after this. He needs you." She nods, looking more nervous than before, probably realizing that in a moment, she may experience a fear she has never before faced in a simulation.

I'm relieved to find that it doesn't appear that this sim is related in any way to whatever horrifying things she experienced in the war. In this sim, Tris is attacked by a murder of crows. Her hands pat the ground until she stands now holding a gun, and she probably just manipulated the sim, but I can't be positive. Soon she has shot enough of the crows that the rest have flown away.

Her eyes open and I stare at her, then the timer on my screen, then back to her, stunned.

"What was my time?" she asks, looking tough as nails, totally unfazed. I'm guessing she has been through this sim before.

Bewildered, I answer, "Two minutes ten seconds." Tris simply nods. She said she was good at sims, but this is unparalleled. "What was your average before?" I whisper.

"Two forty-five." She says it like it's totally normal. Like her average isn't three minutes faster than the best initiates from either of the past two initiate classes. I gape at her. She's absolutely incredible. Unfortunately, being that fast, it will draw attention to her. She needs to be very careful, and I know she knows that, but I'll have to reiterate that to her anyway next time I see her away from the cameras.

"Well done," I tell her before sending her on to help Uriah through the emotions left behind by his simulation. "I'll save Marlene and Lynn for near the end," I assure her before she walks out the door.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

When Marlene was forced by that simulation to step off the roof and fall to her death, I had to make a split second decision: I could save Marlene, or I could save Hector. Obviously, I chose the latter; Shauna had just been shot, barely survived, and ended up paralyzed. In that moment I just could not bear to let Lynn's little brother die when she was already going through so much with her sister. I've never really gotten over the guilt of letting Marlene die, even though I know I wouldn't have felt any better had it been Hector. In a situation like that, you can't win.

Sitting with Uriah as he cries into my shoulder, that guilt is back full force. Seeing how this affects Uriah _still,_ even now that we have come back and he has another chance (even if it isn't going so well, so far), even knowing that in a while, Marlene will walk through that door completely unscathed… my heart hurts for him. She was my friend, too, and I hope every day that we will be again, but he loves her so much.

"I'm so sorry, Uri," I whisper, tears running down my own face.

He pulls back from me, shaking his head. "I understand the choice you made, Tris. It was hard at first… but I understand. It wasn't like you got to spend days weighing your options. You could only save one of them. There wasn't a right choice. The one you made just happened to be one that really hurt for _me._ "

We are silent for a long time. "Do you think we'll ever get over the things we had to do?" I ask. He just shrugs.

Initiates begin to filter in as we sit there silently. I'm trying to decide what to say to him about Marlene, about helping him figure out how to get things back how they should be, but I am interrupted by Eric standing in the doorway, his eyes narrowed at me sitting shoulder to shoulder and hip to hip with Uriah. "Stiff," he orders, "come with me."

* * *

I stare blankly across the desk at Eric. I have just finished recounting everything I remember about the 'incident' two nights ago that resulted in ten stitches in Edward's arm. This is Dauntless, of course, so ten stitches is not a big deal, but the fact that the intention of _whoever_ stabbed Edward (since we're apparently pretending not to _know_ who did it) was to at least partially blind him, possibly kill him, and for sure to move up in the rankings in the most cowardly way possible, means that there is an investigation.

I don't recall any such investigation last time, when there was actually permanent damage, so my intuition tells me that this is just an excuse on Eric's part to get me into his office. I can only hope that the resulting investigation is real.

"Did you need anything else?" I ask after a long, uncomfortable silence.

Eric stands, so I do too. As he walks around the desk toward me, I back slowly toward the door, trying not to be too obvious about how repulsed I am by him. Either I am successful in hiding it, or he doesn't care; Eric, as usual, guides me with his hand low on my back, almost on my butt. Near the door, he stops before opening it, wrapping his arm around me. I manage not to shudder at being so close to him.

"It's a fair assumption," he says, "that Edward was targeted because of his rank." _Figured that all out on your own, did you, Nose?_ I think sarcastically as I nod. "I don't believe that you could have been the culprit- not because you're incapable, but because you aren't a coward." _This really is an alternate universe- Eric is complimenting me._

Eric pulls me closer to him and bile rises in my throat. "You are probably not safe in the dormitory," he continues, "so I wanted to offer, if you wish, you are welcome to stay with me. I only have one bedroom, though." He smirks as he lets go of me and backs away.

"You're dismissed." His voice is gruff and his words clipped, but he winks at me as I glance back at him on my way out the door. I suddenly feel an intense need to take a shower.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

After that extremely horrific, utterly traumatic fear simulation, all I can think about is Marlene. We have always been such good friends. I hate the way that we've been so distant lately. I don't think I can bring up Tris or Edward with her- I'm not strong enough for that today. But I at least want to get some of our old friendship back.

She must be one of the last fear sims of the day. Four probably did that on purpose to give Tris time to calm me down, and I certainly appreciate that. I needed someone to just be with me and understand, and there could be no one better than Tris for that. I just wish it hadn't brought back so much guilt for her. I know she did her best, over and over, throughout the whole war. I also know that I have never met anyone in my life that holds onto guilt like Tris does.

Finally, after hours of laying on my bed waiting, Marlene comes back to the dormitory, her eyes red, and climbs onto her bunk, which is right next to mine.

"Hey," I say softly. I know how these fear sims are, especially the first one. They don't stay contained in that room. You carry the fear with you everywhere. A week from now the entire group of initiates will have nails bitten down to the point of bleeding and dark circles under their eyes from the nightmares. "I thought maybe we could go do something fun, just you and me. Get our minds off what a sadist Four must be to put us through that." I'm not serious in calling him a sadist, of course. I could see how shaken he was by my sim. "After you have a little while to calm down, of course," I add.

Marlene doesn't really smile, but she nods, and I lay back to give her some time to collect herself.

* * *

An hour and a half later, Marlene and are hopping off the train in Amity. As we approach the gate I mentally fist pump when someone I know is there operating it. "Mia!" I call out.

Mia grins as we approach. I met Mia through Zeke and Four, and she's always up for a good prank. "If it isn't Zeke Jr. What brings you out here?"

I fist bump Mia as we meet. "Mar and I had an idea for a prank, but we need to sneak into the chicken coop." I hold my hands up, palms facing out, as I add, "no chickens will be harmed, I promise, and I'm sure that someone will return them." I give her a lopsided grin, Marlene giggles, and Mia turns to the keypad and punches in a code as she glances back at me with a mischievous smirk.

"If you get caught and I get brought into it, you'll be sorry, Pedrad," she warns, but her grin only widens. I wave with one hand as we jog through the open gate, pausing as Mia calls out to tell me where the coops are.

Security in Amity is virtually non-existent, and we aren't noticed, let alone stopped, by a single person as we enter the coup. "Okay, we need four chickens," I tell Marlene, holding out a duffel bag. We each unceremoniously stuff in two chickens, leaving behind a blizzard of white feathers as we hurry back out the door.

Mia lets us back in, and we are back to the tracks only an hour after jumping off.

"Where to now, cap'n?" Marlene asks with a salute. I haven't told her my whole plan yet, and I won't until we're on the train. Really, I'm just enjoying the time with her. Neither of us have mentioned Tris or Edward, or any of the stresses of initiation; we're just having fun together, like old times.

"You'll see," I grin at her. I'm not sure how long it will be until the next train arrives, but I don't hear it coming yet, so I glance around searching my mind for something to do. I want to keep this lighthearted tone to my time with Mar. I want her to remember how much fun we always have together, to miss the time she hasn't been spending with me, the way I miss the time I used to spend with her.

I grin as I point to a fence guard a few dozen yards away from us. "Look at him there, Mar," I say. The man has dark hair cut short, no piercings, and he's pretty scrawny looking for a Dauntless, but he has a spider tattoo on his face. He stands sort of slouched, with his lower lip jutted out. "Hmmm I say his name is… Lyle," I begin. "He has sixteen fears. Help me come up with them."

"Okay," Marlene laughs, "um… especially bright sunsets."

I smile at her. "Llamas."

"Little girls from Amity."

"Butterflies. And obviously spiders," I say gesturing in his general direction, but meaning the tattoo across his cheek.

We go back and forth coming up with ridiculously stupid fears and move on to making up a backstory for him, deciding that he was a transfer from Erudite, tying it in with the fear we assigned him relating to test anxiety, who had never had a girlfriend and lived alone with seven cats. We did throw him a bone, though, by deciding that he is the faction's best tightrope walker.

By the time we tire of imagining obscure personality traits and life events for the skinny, slouchy stranger at the fence, the train is in view. We run so we can match its speed when it arrives, and I throw myself in first, Marlene a moment behind me, landing sprawled on top of me. We both burst into one of those fits of laughter that just keeps going and going until your abs scream in pain and you can't even remember why you're laughing.

"Okay," Marlene says between gasps, hiccups and aftershocks of further laughter, "tell me the plan now, will you?"

I grin. "Okay, you got that paint?" She reaches into her pocket, pulling out a small bottle of red paint and two brushes. "Perfect."

I quickly explain the prank I want to pull before we get our 'props' ready and put everything away again. By the time we're done I can see that we're only a few minutes from our jump in Erudite. We both put on our sunglasses and pull up our black hoods; we're pretty sure we can outrun anyone in this lame faction of nerds, but we don't need to be recognized. We're really not supposed to even be leaving the compound without a member, during initiation.

It is dusk, so we sneak from shadow to shadow, through alleyways full of debris and broken glass, evidence of the destruction brought on by a war long past, and dodging huge cracks in the asphalt. Soon the Erudite headquarters comes into view.

I've been here a few times before, always for some sort of prank. Noses are fun to pull pranks on because they are so uptight and logical. The building is huge and the whole front of it is made of clear glass. Inside, the lobby is quite large, and basically, it, along with the first few floors of the whole building, are a big library. Typical, right?

It's harder to sneak as we get closer- there are more people around and good places to hide are further and further apart. We slowly circle around to the back of the building and try doors looking for any that might be unlocked. After a while, Marlene calls out- "Uri! Right here!"

I follow Marlene in through the side door she found not fully latched. Quietly, and hoping the chickens won't squawk too loudly and attract attention, we sneak toward the front of the building. I hear voices- voices that are familiar- and quickly pull Mar into a bathroom, stashing the duffels of chickens in a stall. I open the door just a crack and listen as the pair walks past, holding my finger to my lips to make sure Marlene knows to stay silent.

"The attack will take place early the morning after initiation." Jeanine. "What I need _you_ to do, Caleb, is to return to Abnegation and make your family and former neighbors believe that you are on their side. You will be my ears on the inside. I will be implanting a tracking device in your upper arm. Any refugees, you will stay with them, saving me the trouble of searching for them."

"I take faction before blood very seriously, Jeanine. Thank you so much for this opportunity," Caleb says, sounding like the worst suck-up I've ever heard, even after ten years of rolling my eyes at the Erudites in my classes. "If my former faction is harboring as many divergents as you say, genocide is the only option we have."

I look at Marlene. Her eyes widen, and I can see all the questions in them. The voices fade and I let out the breath I had been holding just about the whole time I've been in here as I let the door fully shut.

"Who was that?!" Marlene whispers anxiously.

I swallow hard, looking in her eyes, then away for a moment, and then right back into them. "That was Jeanine Matthews," I say, "and Caleb Prior. Tris's brother. I recognized his voice, that's why I pulled us in here."

Marlene shakes her head. "How would you know her brother, Uriah? Well enough to recognize his voice?" Her voice breaks, she seems so confused and almost betrayed, and I don't blame her.

I run my hand through my hair. "Mar, I really want to answer you. I want to tell you everything I know. But here, now- this isn't the place, or the time. I promise I will soon. _I promise._ "

Marlene looks slightly hurt, but that gives way to a look of resignation and understanding and, I think, trust. She takes a breath and gives me that flirty Marlene smile I love so much. "Well, should we prank a bunch of Noses now?" I grin and nod, then we grab the bags, which are actually kind of hard to carry with the chickens moving around so much, and slowly and carefully exit the bathroom, resuming our journey to the Great Library.

As we get close, I open the bag and let out the chicken with the number '5' painted on it. Just before entering the great library, Marlene lets out the chicken numbered '2'.

We look at each other and in unison, as only people who have been friends as long as we have can really do, as if we can communicate telepathically, we both grab the last chickens- hers numbered '1' and mine numbered '3'- out of the duffel bags, throwing the handles over our shoulders, and dart through the main hall, releasing the chickens into the middle of the room. They flutter their wings, sending white feathers into the air, and cluck and squawk in fear at the startled gasps and yells of the people inside the library. Everyone is so startled that they don't even try to chase us as we bolt through the front doors and don't stop until we are well concealed among the abandoned buildings.

Even with the disappointment of knowing that Caleb will still betray his family, and even with that horrible fear simulation I endured this morning, this has been the best day I have had in awhile, thanks to Marlene. Just by existing, she makes my world brighter, and I will go into tomorrow and the days after with a renewed hope and determination to keep her.

* * *

When we arrive back to Dauntless, I haven't even glanced at the Pire yet when Marlene is preparing to jump and mutters, "oh, shit!" We have to jump now, so I'm out of the train before I see what she was reacting to.

I barely have a chance to see Eric before I hear him. "What the hell did you two think you were doing?" he growls. "I got a phone call that two young Dauntless- and I can't say I'm surprised to see that one of them was you, Pedrad- caused the biggest stir Erudite headquarters has seen in years." At first, I'll admit it- I'm scared. Because honestly, Eric is someone to fear. But then I see the corner of his mouth twitch upward and realize how hard he is trying not to show his amusement.

I cock a grin. "You're just jealous that you didn't think of it, Eric," I say cockily.

His facade breaks and we're treated to a very rare sight: Eric is laughing. "Fine, fine, you're right. Just tell me where you let chicken number four go so I can tell Jeanine, because the whole faction is on a crazy chicken-hunt right now."

"Oh, come on, Eric," Marlene says, and her smile is flawlessly flirty. I mean, Mar is the queen of flirty smiles but this is the best one I've ever seen. "You were Erudite. You can figure out the punchline to this prank."

Eric stares at her blankly for about five seconds, and swear I can see the gears turning in his mind. You can take the man out of Erudite, but you can't take the Erudite out of the man. Finally he starts shaking in laughter and I know he's figured it out: there is no chicken number four. The whole point of the prank was to make them search for a chicken that never existed. "Are you sure _you two_ don't belong in Erudite? Because you certainly outsmarted Jeanine." He continues to roar in laughter and simply gestures us inside. He's laughing too hard to catch his breath and get the words out. Marlene and I grin at each other and run for it before he can change his mind.

I can't remember the last time I was this happy.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

It's nine o'clock when I enter the control room. I love being here at night: there are only two other people monitoring the security footage, so it's quiet and relatively private. Zeke isn't here and no one else bothers to try making conversation with me, so I am able to use a computer without any interruption from my coworkers.

I log in using the fake account name I set up months ago in preparation what I am about to do. The mirroring program I installed on my end takes a moment to pop up after I open it, but it's just like being on his personal computer once I'm in. Max labels his folders with numbers so this is like a needle in a haystack- there's no way to guess what will be in any of the files. I work in a logical fashion, starting with the lowest numbers and working my way up in order. Most of the time it's nothing interesting or worth looking at any further, but finally, I find what I had been dreading.

In the folder numbered 157 is where I find it. There are lists of supplies… enough weapons to arm the whole faction, and an equal numbers of syringes- far more than we would ever need for initiation. There are large quantities of something called _Serum D_ _2_ _._ I will have to ask Tris if she knows what that is; we haven't yet spoken in any detail about this war. Other files include thinly veiled commands, and maps. It's hard at first to figure out what the map is of, but comparing the letters and numbers on the grid to those on a city map, I quickly find exactly what I was expecting: they are maps of Abnegation.

I already knew I believed Tris, but here is my proof. All she has to do is explain how it will happen and if that explains this serum- and I have no doubt it will- there can be no denying it. Everything Tris and Uriah have said will happen is about to become a reality, unless we stop it.


	16. Chapter 15

_**A/N: Hey everyone! If you're over 18 and you like this sort of thing... there is an M-rated version of this chapter that you can find through my author page. THIS version I have kept T-rated. Enjoy, and let me know what you think! I love reading reviews!**_

 **CHAPTER FIFTEEN (T)**

 _ **Myra**_

Al and I left Dauntless together. We were each provided a backpack, packed with our few belongings, and were basically pushed out the door by Eric himself. Then we just stood there for a while- Al, me, and two Dauntless-borns whose names I don't even remember. They set off together while Al and I just sat on the cracked concrete sidewalk wondering where we should go next.

Eventually, we began walking. Dauntless is the city's southernmost sector. Al wasn't too familiar with the city's layout, but this was one place that my Erudite background was an advantage; I have studied the city maps enough to have a good idea of where we were and where we were going. The common areas of the city are between Dauntless and Erudite. North of Erudite is Candor, and the Factionless sector, where we were headed, was to the west of Candor, just to the south of Abnegation.

It was dark by the time we finally arrived. We both struggled with our emotions as we walked along the outskirts of the factions we were born in- Erudite for me, Candor for Al. I held it together by not thinking about Edward as we crossed from Erudite into the edge of the Factionless sector, Candor just across the murky riverbed right there in our view, and that is when I collapsed on the sidewalk sobbing. It was all just too much. The rest of my life hopeless, stuck in this depressing mess we had just entered of grime and abandoned buildings, from which we would never escape. Even worse, the ghost of every dream I had for a future with Edward played at my memories, compounded by the images of him laughing happily with his arm wrapped around that Dauntless girl.

I cried until my tears ran dry and I was empty, and Al held me the whole time. It was very late by then, so I climbed through the broken out window of the nearest abandoned building and unlocked a door from the inside to let Al in. Al was a really big guy, much bigger than Edward even, and would never have squeezed through that window. Then we found a room toward the center of the building, on the third floor, and huddled together as we restlessly faded in and out of sleep. Al kept his arms around me the whole time and he felt like a big teddy bear, but one that was determined to keep me safe.

For most of the next day, we wandered the factionless sector, moving gradually toward the center and eventually closer to the Abnegation sector. We had decided that because the Abnegation feed and clothe the Factionless, it was likely that more of them were congregated further to the north.

Now, a day and a half after being turned out into the streets, we find that we were right: the northern part of the factionless sector, near Abnegation, is in fact where the Factionless gather. In fact, the farther north we go, the more dirty, mis-matched figures we see creeping through alleyways and down side streets. We are meandering down West Grand Avenue, Al's arm protectively around my shoulder, kicking at broken glass and chunks of concrete, when a tall woman in black Candor pants and a baggy gray Abnegation shirt approaches us.

"Cut from Dauntless?" she asks bluntly. We both simply nod. The woman sticks out her hand. "I'm Therese. I can help you get settled in here," she says.

I look at Al. We sort of communicate with our eyes, then he shrugs, and I nod at Therese. She leads us down a few blocks of side streets, then through a narrow, dingy alleyway, until she stops at a door that I wouldn't be able to distinguish from a hundred others around here and ushers us inside.

I was always told that the Factionless live alone, without community, without relationships, just… lonely and desolate. What I see in this building, though, is anything but people living all alone. There are makeshift cots all over the floors and in the center of the room is a big metal fire pit. Unkempt people in mismatched clothing pass around cans of food, each taking a bite then handing it off to the next, so everyone seems to get a little of each available food. We follow Therese down a dark hallway and she holds up her hand to wordlessly communicate that we should wait here, then she disappears behind a door at the end of the hall.

Al leans against the wall and exhales loud and long, his head in his hands. "I was going to join Abnegation," he says. I snap my head up to look at him. There are tears in his eyes.

"Why didn't you?" I ask. He would have been much better off there. I could see him fitting in, in Abnegation. Or maybe Amity. Certainly not Dauntless. He and I have that in common- we are neither of us suited for that faction.

Al looks away as he answers. "I have had a crush on Beatrice- Tris, I mean- for years," he says wistfully. "I was going to transfer to Abnegation hoping I'd have a chance with her there. Imagine my surprise at the Choosing Ceremony when she chose Dauntless."

I pull him into a hug. I think I hear a door open, but whoever it is can interrupt us if it's that important. Until then, my attention will be on Al. He's the only friend I have, at this point. "So you followed her to Dauntless," I say softly, "just like I followed Edward." I feel Al nod.

"And I don't know if it's the worst part, or if it makes it better, that I never even stood a chance with her!" he says bitterly. I'm pretty sure I know _exactly_ what he means, too. "Right from day one, _Four_ couldn't keep his eyes off of her… and she was just as bad when it came to _him._ " Someone is behind Al, but I still don't pay any attention. They're several yards away and don't seem to be trying to command our attention.

I pull back and look at him, nodding. "I noticed," I say, debating whether to tell him what I saw the other night. I decide I may as well, maybe it will help him to move on. "I had noticed, too, that Four was head over heels for Tris, even though I don't think he realized that anyone could see it. Then, when I followed after Tris and Marlene to the infirmary the other night because I was worried about Edward, I got there just as Tris was walking away with Four. Only, they didn't go back toward the dorms."

Al's voice is almost a whisper. "Where did they go, Myra?"

My eyes widen as I realize how that must have sounded. "Oh, no, they didn't go back to his place, Al, if that's what you thought." He instantly looks relieved. "No, I followed them, and he took her down some remote hallway. They hugged, and there was some whispering. Then they kissed… and... there was something real there, you know? They hugged again and I snuck away before they could see me watching them. I'm sure you've figured it out, Al, but I think he's in love with her, and I'd bet money she's in love with him, too."

It's not hard to see by looking in Al's eyes that he's taking this hard, but really, he knows that even if he had a chance with Tris at Dauntless, he wouldn't now that he's been cut. He nods, and his voice shakes. "I hope he'll be good to her." He laughs slightly. "At least I'm positive that he didn't change her rank to keep her from being cut."

I smile slightly, though I'm not sure why. "She was shockingly good."

"Yeah," he whispers, "she was. She's pretty special. Too special to be with me, I guess."

A throat clears behind Al- I can't see around him, but I know the person has been there for quite a while. It also occurs to me they have probably been listening to our entire conversation. Al turns, and now I can see her standing next to Therese.

She is very slender, with curly dark hair, olive skin and a hooked nose. There is something slightly familiar about her, but I can't place it. "Hello," the stranger says, and she smiles, but it does not quite reach her eyes. "I'm Evelyn, and I am the leader of the Factionless."

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

Uriah looks at his hands, biting his lip, as he comes out of the fear simulation on the second day of stage two. I feel like I need to say something- he is my best friend's little brother, after all- but I'm really not qualified to give advice about girls. In today's simulation, Uriah professed his love to Marlene, and she rejected him. I know that he is well aware that it wasn't real, but that doesn't seem to make him feel much better.

What makes it all more complicated for me is my nervousness that I'll say something I shouldn't. I can't reveal to him that Marlene's sim today was about him, too. In her case, it was her fear of losing him to Tris. I'm sure she thinks she already has, and I really did not enjoy watching the Uriah of Marlene's imagination making out with my girlfriend.

"Look, Uriah," I say finally, "maybe you should just tell her. Face your fear, right? You know Marlene cares for you. Maybe she's just hurt that you haven't been spending as much time with her. Maybe she feels the same way you do."

Uriah shrugs. "Seems like she's already got something going on with Edward."

"And everyone- including Marlene- probably thinks you're with Tris," I remind him. " _I_ know you aren't, but that's probably not how Mar sees it."

"I know." He still hasn't looked at me. "I'll try." I squeeze his shoulder and help him up, asking him to send Tris in. She's the last one of the day. I feel a little bad about making her sit out there all day when she would probably be in and out in just a couple of minutes, but it's easier to fake a computer malfunction to explain an erased recording if said computer doesn't have to work for the rest of the initiates immediately after, and Uriah and Tris are the most likely to need their sims deleted from the system. I'm really very lucky that Eric hasn't asked me yet about the one I deleted for Uriah yesterday.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

Four's advice replays in my mind. I can't put my finger on it, but I just have this feeling that he knew something more, something I don't. I know he's right. I need to talk to Marlene. But first, I should find out if it's alright to tell her about Four and Tris, because that would help my case a hell of a lot. I am not really sure when I will be ready to tell her the truth about what Tris and I went through together, though, and I'm not sure if I should try to talk to her about my feelings until I'm prepared to talk about everything.

On the other hand, I did promise her that I would tell her everything soon.

I check my watch and see that dinner is just starting. Perfect- cake almost always makes me feel better. And maybe I can do this. Maybe I can face my fear, like Four said. Maybe I can even risk Marlene thinking I'm completely nuts and trust her to understand and believe me, just like Four did with Tris.

I decide to skip the actual dinner until later- right now I just want my cake. But when I approach our usual table, cake in hand, all that hope and courage I was feeling is replaced by far less pleasant emotions. I hesitantly sit across the table from Marlene and Edward, who are talking and laughing together about I have no idea what, nor do I really care.

Marlene and I had such a great time yesterday, and I felt like I had her back… and the very next day, here she is flirting with Edward again, as if I am _nothing_ to her. Maybe I _am_ nothing in her eyes. I love her so much, and the jealousy has been building each day. I know I should just get up and leave, because it's at its boiling point. I know I should, but I don't.

It's then that I see Edward slip his arm around Marlene's waist, pulling her closer, and whisper something into her ear. He brings a forkful of cake to his mouth and I finally notice that they are _sharing_ a piece of cake. Like an actual couple. I don't care what Four said any more, he's obviously wrong about this. They're together. And I am not the kind of guy who gets in the middle of a happy couple, no matter how in love with Marlene I may be.

That doesn't mean I'm not a jealous asshole, either, though.

I clear my throat. "I believe that cake is _mine_ , Marlene." There isn't even the slightest hint of humor in my voice, and somewhere deep inside I cringe at how cold I sound.

"Excuse you?" Edward says, eyes blazing with anger as he protectively pulls her even closer to him. Marlene's mouth has dropped open in shock.

"Excuse _you._ You didn't forget about our bet did you, Marlene?" I can't even stand to shorten her name. It's too friendly, too familiar, for how I am feeling at this moment. "Tris jumped first. I get your cake for a month. Now stop sharing it with this _Nose_ and give it to me."

Marlene scoffs and narrows her eyes at me as she pushes the cake angrily across the table, and I feel a little guilty for the tiniest moment at the hurt I see in her eyes. But then Edward whispers in her ear and she nods and the guilt is gone before I really have any time to reflect on it.

Edward and Marlene both stand, and as they turn to walk away, Marlene spits out, "Enjoy your cake." My blood pressure rises at her snotty comment. I don't even recognize myself with my next move, with their eyes on me I smile at just her, "I sure will Mar," and then toss the cake in the trash bin that was just to the side of our table. Her eyes widen in shock. I turn and walk in the opposite direction from the love birds. Screw them. I groan. What is this girl doing to me?

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

Tris smiles slightly as she enters the room, and I lead her to the chair with my hand on her lower back. "Remember to act like a Dauntless," I whisper as I brush her hair aside to inject her with the serum. "And don't manipulate the sim." She nods slightly as I pull away from her and press the electrodes to my forehead. "Be brave," I say, and her eyes flutter shut.

* * *

 _Tris stands in my apartment, holding my hand. Or, the simulation version of me. Simulation Four pulls Tris into a passionate kiss, and her eyes flutter shut. "Tris," 'I' whisper, in a voice so full of need that it sounds foreign, burying my face in her hair, 'my' hands roaming her body in a way I can't imagine daring to touch her, "Tris, I love you."_

 _I watch 'myself' pull her toward my bed, lifting her shirt over her head before leading her to lay back onto it. I think I actually stop breathing… I think I know what is going to happen next. But Tris doesn't look afraid, which puzzles me as this is a fear simulation. Her eyes are as filled with love and want as much as my own._

 _In a blur, 'I' have pulled off my shirt and leaned down to hover over her. Our lips meet again and we kiss deeply. I am overwhelmed with emotions as the scene progresses. Watching her simulation is the most amazing, hottest, strangest experience of my life. Tris and 'I', in a simulation, are doing something we have never done before, something I can only hope that one day I will experience with her._

 _When she and Simulation Four are done, and my heartrate has begun to slow, I see Simulation Four get up and smirk at her, and the look on 'his' face makes me want to punch him, even though I know 'he' is_ me. " _Tobias?" Tris says, confused, as the 'other' me quickly pulls on clothes, tossing hers at her. 'I' barely look at her. "Thanks, Tris,...that was...nice." 'I' say coldly, "I guess I'll see you around."_

" _W-what?" Tears are streaming down her face and she grabs 'my' wrist only to have 'me' rip it away from her._

 _Simulation Four scoffs, and I am horrified as he smirks at her again and says, "You didn't really think I could love a_ little girl _like you, did you? You really are stupid. Did you think that you are the only girl I have been with...or will be with?"_

" _Tobias, no! You love me! I know you do!" she sobs as 'I' push her away, laughing._

 _Before disappearing from the room, Simulation Four glances back at her and says, "This is my apartment. Make sure you're gone by the time I get back. I may not be alone."_

 _Her sobs seem to continue forever and I cannot watch this any more._

* * *

I rip off the electrodes and frantically fumble with the computer, typing in the commands to end the simulation. On the screen I can see that she has been in for over ten minutes- a short time for the typical initiate, but impossibly long for Tris. I climb into the chair next to her, pulling her into my lap, wrapping my arms around her as she only sobs harder, even though she is now out of the sim, gathering my shirt in her fists. I feel overwhelmed and helpless, and I have no idea what to say to her.

She is afraid that I will use her and leave her, that I will take advantage of the way I know she feels for me. I can't help feeling hurt that knowing me as well as she does, she could ever believe I might do that to her. Her sobs begin to die down and she lets go of my shirt; I don't relax my grip on her, but I try to look at her face, only to find it covered by her delicate hands.

"Tris," I say gently. She doesn't move. I pull her hands away from her face, and she just looks down at the floor. The bright flush to her cheeks makes it clear how embarrassed she is. She pushes me away and stands, her back facing me, as she nervously plays with her hands.

"I need some time, Four," she says, and I'm surprised how much it stings to hear her call me by my nickname. "We'll talk about it later." With that, she practically runs out of the room, leaving me stunned.

I don't know what to feel, or what to think. I am so confused. Tris's escape from this room left it cold and empty, left me cold and empty, and I feel like I screwed up, which is crazy because I didn't _do_ anything. I didn't do anything right, or anything wrong, I didn't do anything at all, yet somehow, things suddenly got even more complicated.

What could I have I done that would make her doubt me in such a horrible way?


	17. Chapter 16

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN**

 _ **Tris**_

When I left the simulation room after that completely humiliating fear sim that I was unlucky enough to have Tobias watch, I found myself heading to the Chasm. As soon as I realized where I was going, though, I turned around and walked the other way, trying to concentrate well enough to find someplace else to be alone. The Chasm is _our_ place, Tobias and mine. I can't go there now. Eventually, I ended up at the net.

I lay there for hours, missing dinner entirely, trying to sort out my emotions and all the thoughts in my head- thoughts running through so fast that I could hardly comprehend them. Tobias has never given me any reason to doubt his feelings for me- quite the opposite. He has done nothing that should lead me to even consider that he would ever use me like that. And yet, somewhere deep inside me, I must still believe that I am not enough for him.

And why wouldn't I? Look at him! He's gorgeous. He's a Dauntless prodigy, a living legend. The man with only _four_ fears. He could have any girl he wants, and I still can't understand why he would ever want _me,_ of all people. I am not ugly but I'm certainly not pretty… though Tobias sometimes made me believe that maybe I am. I don't have all the soft curves that other girls have. And after everything I have been through, I feel like I am so weak, so broken. How could he love me? Furthermore, the intensity of my feelings for _him_ certainly give the perfect opportunity for him to exploit them if he ever wanted to. I know Tobias well enough to be certain that he isn't like that, but sometimes the heart doesn't listen to the mind.

Besides that whole humiliating experience today, there is the disappointment over what Uriah overheard in Erudite yesterday. I suppose it's still possible that Caleb is only playing Jeanine and he doesn't really believe the things Uriah heard him say, but I can't take the risk. I can only assume that what Uriah and Marlene overheard is proof that Caleb is not to be trusted. I need to get word to my parents, but I don't know how, nor do I know how to convince them that I am right. If I were in their shoes, I would not want to believe that my own son would betray me that way, and had I not been through it all myself, I probably would never believe my brother could do such a thing.

But he did.

I'm still mulling over all of these thoughts in my head when I leave the net and walk around the compound. It is past curfew, so I don't see anyone around. Perfect- peaceful and quiet is just what I need right now.

Unfortunately, I am so distracted that I forget to keep my guard up until it is too late. I am at the opposite end of the pit from where the Chasm is when a hand covers my mouth while the other wraps around my waist, lifting my feet off the floor. I try to scream, but the hand muffles the sound. I bite down hard on the fingers and taste blood; as the now bloody hand releases my mouth, the one around my waist loosens its grip slightly and this is my chance. I twist out of his hold, now facing him.

He's wearing a black mask, but I rip it off, and it's just who I would have expected it to be: Peter. He punches at my temple, and I jerk away in time to only get hit in the jaw. I stagger back and he kicks my ribs, but I roll away and get to my feet before he can get in a second kick.

The world is spinning around me and I brush my fingers against the cold stone floor to keep from falling over. He lunges at me and I dodge him, elbowing him hard in the stomach. He takes a few steps back, doubled over, and I have time to regain my balance a bit more before his next assault.

This time, when he comes at me, I'm ready. I dodge a punch aimed for my throat, and he has thrown too much of his body into it. I take advantage of his compromised balance, kicking his knee, then sweeping his feet out from under him. He falls to the floor and I kick and punch, over and over, seeing red just like I did during our final fight last week.

Somehow, I come to my senses before I kill the bastard. What was he even thinking? Last time he attacked me three on one, and this time, when he knows I am capable of beating him on my own, he comes alone? I shake my head as I kick Peter's unconscious form one more time in the ribs, just for the hell of it. His decision to come alone must have been a matter of pride; he must have felt the need to prove that he could take me. _Well, that didn't work out so well, did it?_ I think with a smirk.

The next thing I know, I am running, running, until I find myself in the one place in this compound I have ever felt completely safe. I take a deep breath, closing my eyes and gathering my strength, and knock on the door.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

I am lying awake, my mind still going over and over Tris's simulation and her reaction afterward, when I am startled by loud knocking at my door. It's nearly midnight, and the knocking is rushed and urgent sounding. I pull on a shirt as fast as I can and hurry to the front door.

The knocking still hasn't ceased when I throw the door open. "Tris!" I breathe as she pushes past me, immediately shutting and locking the door. I turn on a light and finally get a good look at her, sucking in a shocked breath as I notice the bruise forming on her jaw. Her cheeks are tear-streaked and her lip is cut. I firmly hold both her upper arms and look into her eyes. "Tris, what happened?!"

"Peter," she sighs, pulling herself out of my grasp to get a couple of ice packs out of the freezer compartment of my refrigerator and pressing one against her jaw as she makes her way to my bed. After she lays down, she asks me to check her side, and I wince at the large bruise forming along her ribs; then _she_ winces as I check to be sure nothing is broken.

"He caught me off guard," she explains. "I was distracted, thinking about… about my sim today, and about what Uriah told me about my brother yesterday…" I have no idea what Uriah might have said about her brother or how he could have even gotten information about him, but we can get to that later. "Last time he attacked me three to one. I'm lucky that he was I guess too prideful for that this time around, or I would probably be dead at the bottom of the chasm right now."

"What kind of shape is Peter in now, then?" I ask with a chuckle.

She smirks. "It ended up a lot like my fight with him in training, except no one was there to stop me. He's alive, but he might wish he wasn't, the way he'll probably be feeling in the morning."

"That's my girl," I laugh proudly as I kiss her temple, and try to hide my hurt when she ducks her head away from me. I hold the second ice pack against her ribs and lay down on the bed with her, pulling her in closer to me.

We lay in an awkward silence until I finally bring up the elephant in the room. "We need to talk about your sim today, Tris."

"What about it?" Tris snaps before clenching her jaw and staring intently at the wall.

Is she kidding right now? " _What about?!"_ I hiss, trying my hardest not to yell. "Um, maybe about the fact that I don't even know if we've ever had sex, then I _watched_ us do it in your sim, after which you made me out to be a complete monster!"

"It's not like I made a conscious decision to have you treat me like that in my sim, _Four_." Tris's eyes blaze in defiance.

"Don't use that name like a weapon against me!" I run my hands through my hair in frustration. "And I know you didn't _choose_ to portray me that way. That's what makes it even worse, Tris! That it was your subconscious! That deep down inside, this is what you actually _believe!_ You really see me as that heartless monster in your sim! Why would you believe that, Tris?! What did I ever do that you would think that of me?" It is unnerving how much it hurts to know she sees me that way, when I've known her such a short time.

"I've _never_ understood why you would choose me, Tobias!" Her eyes shine with unshed tears and I ache to comfort her. But I don't. I am too angry and too stubborn. "Then there were all your secrets. All the things you never trusted me with. And when you lied to me and went off with _Nita,_ how do you think I felt?! She was gorgeous and everything I am not!" Tris screams at me, then turns and faces away from me, her arms crossed over her chest.

I run my hand over my face. "We can come back to that first part, Tris, but I have no idea what you're talking about. Who the hell is Nita?!"

"She was from the Bureau," Tris says in a small voice, but dismissively.

In that moment all my frustration and anger at this situation bubbles to the surface. Tris knows everything that is going to happen and she has just left me in the dark about it. She is holding over my head things I haven't even done yet! How am I supposed to do better, or understand what she is feeling, or be on the same level in this relationship with her at all? "I don't know what the hell the Bureau is, Tris. I don't know _anything_ because _you_ haven't told me! How would you like it if the tables were turned? How are we supposed to have a relationship if you are keeping all these secrets from me?"

Tris stands still, facing away from me, arms still crossed like a five year old pouting. I run my hand through my hair and let out a deep sigh of frustration. "Have you always avoided our problems like this? By running off like a five year old?"

Tris whips around facing me, her face red with anger. "Like you were ever any better! All the times you just stomped off instead of talking to me, all the secrets you kept from me!"

"Then why were we even together?!" I yell. "Why did you even come back? Because it doesn't seem to me that we were any good for one another. We obviously didn't trust each other. I _still_ don't even know for sure whether the first part of that sim was based on experience or imagination!"

"It was based on experience," she says quietly. "The night before I died. That was our first time."

"Did I leave you then?" I ask just as quietly.

Tris shakes her head, tears beginning to spill over and run down her cheeks. "No, you didn't," she says, "but we had been through it all together. This time… God, I love you so much, Tobias, and I'm scared, because you don't feel the same way I do, yet. I hate feeling so vulnerable." Tris turns away from me again, trying to wipe her tears away with her palms. "Maybe you're right. Maybe we don't belong together at all."

I see her shoulders jerk with her silent sobs, and as angry as I am, I know then how much my comments have hurt her. It literally makes my heart hurt. I start to reach out for her, wanting to pull her into my arms, but am interrupted by another loud knock at the door. I growl in frustration. "This had better be important," I mutter as I cross the room back to the door.

I open the door to find Uriah on the other side. "What?!" I snap at him, and he stares at me frozen with his eyes wide and mouth hanging open. "Are you just going to stare at me, or was there actually something important enough to show up here at midnight for?"

"Uh…" he says, snapping out of it, and glancing inside, "I found Peter beat to shit and dragged him to the dormitory. I thought you should know, and I also haven't seen Tris all night and wanted to make sure she was okay. Is she here?"

I roll my eyes and step back, gesturing irritably to where she stands, still facing away from us, across the room. "She's fine. Peter attacked her. She was the one that beat him up."

He sees her heaving shoulders and it's clear that he's registered her emotional state, and that it is not just about what happened with Peter, when he narrows his eyes at me before crossing to her. "Tris?! What happened?" he says, the concern in his voice unmistakable, as he pulls her into his arms. I know it's entirely a friendly gesture, but my fists clench involuntarily. Who do I think I am I kidding? I can't _not_ be with this girl. Or at the very least, I will never be able to stand seeing her with someone else.

Tris is still sobbing into Uriah's chest, so I answer for her. "We were in the middle of a… discussion." Uriah glares at me, and I don't miss the silent accusation in his eyes. "Don't look at me like that. Of course you'd assume that it's all _my_ fault. You know, it's not that easy being in a relationship in this whole… situation." I know he knows what I mean.

"Yeah? Well, it's not easy on her end, either, Four." I roll my eyes. I never said it was.

I pinch the bridge of my nose; I feel a frustration-induced headache beginning to form. "I don't know _anything_ about what happened during that war! She doesn't trust me over things that I- I just have no idea what she's talking about!"

Uriah looks at Tris. "Nita," she says bitterly.

"Yeah, I'm not explaining that one to him," Uriah mumbles. "But he deserves to know."

Tris sighs and finally turns around to face me. "The Bureau of Genetic Welfare is what is outside the fence." The what? "Nita is a girl that you snuck around with in the middle of the night, who convinced you to be part of some rebel group she was a member of, and ultimately, you ignored everything I said, helped Nita, and were a part of setting off the bomb that killed Uriah." I'm so stunned that I stumble back onto my bed. _I killed Uriah-my best friend's brother._ I _was a part of his death. And she never told me?! What else has she been hiding from me?_

I sit on the bed with my head in my hands, imagining how Zeke and Hana must have reacted. Tris and Uriah may not even have an answer to that if I asked; Tris may not have even been there. "Tris," I hear Uriah say gently, "he needs to know everything that happened. I know that some of it, you aren't proud of, but it isn't fair to him." I never would have expected Uriah to be the voice of reason in, well, any situation, ever.

After a few deep breaths, Tris wipes her eyes as I look up at her and her friend, feeling _really_ lucky that Uriah is such a forgiving person. He leads her over to the bed and she sits on the edge, while Uriah climbs on and sits farther in, his legs pulled up and crossed like a pretzel. "Get your shoes off my bed, Uri," I say flatly, and he smiles sheepishly, pulling them off and dropping them on the floor next to the bed.

Uriah and Tris spend the next hour and a half explaining everything that happened with the war. Although Uriah seems to have his own problems on his mind, he does most of the talking. Tris takes over off and on to recount the details of various incidents that Uriah doesn't know much about, such as our stay in Amity, as well as several other incidents that I know we will have to talk more about: her imprisonment in Erudite, the mission she took on behind my back with Marcus, and practically everything that happened at the Bureau. Tris sure as hell was never cut out for Candor.

It's nearly two in the morning when Uriah finally leaves, mumbling something about seeing us in the morning, and I groan realizing how soon we have to be up for training.

"You take the bed. I'll sleep on the floor," I say tiredly, grabbing a pillow and an extra blanket.

Tris frowns. "Tobias, you don't have to-"

"I don't want the first night I spend with you in my arms to be… like _this,_ " I interrupt, "with us upset with each other. I'll be fine down here, Tris."

When the lights are out and I lay with the hard floor digging into my side, Tris's voice reaches me in the darkness. "I don't like fighting with you, Tobias."

"Then maybe you should have been more honest with me, Tris. I can't believe you _chose_ to go into that weapons lab. After everything Caleb did, you still chose him! You chose to leave me."

I almost think she has fallen asleep when she finally says, "I also chose to come back to you. I'm truly sorry, Tobias."

I know that she loves me. I know I'm falling for her, too. There are just so many things to forgive, and I have never been the forgiving type. I hope I can be, for her.


	18. Chapter 17

**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN**

 _ **Marlene**_

Four has called every single initiate… except for Edward, Uriah, the Stiff and me. Seriously, is he totally oblivious to the tension that the four of us left alone together creates? I mean, I guess he isn't around us much as a group, but he's best friends with Zeke, so I would think he would have _some_ idea that things are… a bit uncomfortable. None of us can seem to even look at one another.

"Damn, this sucks," Edward whispers to me. "It's working, though. He's getting more jealous every time he sees us together."

I giggle quietly. Yes, Uriah is definitely jealous. I'm sure it makes that little Stiff mad as hell.

"Didn't anyone ever teach either of you manners?" Uriah says in the same cold tone he used yesterday about the cake I was sharing with Edward. Edward pulls me closer with the arm that is wrapped around my waist and Uriah snorts. "Do you have to be so in everyone's face with the touching?"

Edward tries to hide his smirk.

"Uriah," Tris warns quietly- I can barely hear her. Uriah barely glances at her before glaring at Edward again. As I have many times, I start worrying that I am going too far, pushing Uri too far away from me. I open my mouth to speak, but think better of it and seal my lips shut again. Edward looks at me with his brow furrowed.

"What is your problem, man?" Edward says. "Are you jealous or something?"

* * *

 _*****FLASHBACK*****_

" _Edward," I say, thinking back to his comment about his parents. "You were born for Dauntless, from what I've heard about and seen. If your parents don't show up tomorrow, don't let it get to you. They're not worth it if they can't accept you for who you are. You have people here who think you're pretty amazing." I blush slightly… I probably shouldn't have said that._

 _He smiles. "Well, Marlene," he says, "I hope you know that whoever it is that you are trying to get over is an idiot, because you're beautiful, kind, brave, fun… anyone would be lucky to be with you." In this moment, I realize how much we've leaned in toward each other. We're breathing the same air. Maybe I don't need Uriah at all. Maybe…_

 _And in that moment, Edward closes the distance and presses his lips to mine._

 _And I feel nothing._

 _I pull back, biting my lip. I can't even look at him._

" _Um… uh…" Edward stutters uncomfortably._

" _Look, I'm sorry Edward but-"_

" _Oh, thank God," he sighs. My head snaps in his direction, eyebrows raised probably to my hairline. He laughs. "Seriously, you were about to say that there's nothing there, right?"_

 _I smile and nod. "Yeah, that was like kissing my brother, if I had one," I say with a giggle. Edward just laughs. "I'd still like to keep you around as a great friend, though."_

 _Edward nods. "Friends would be perfect." Then his eyes light up and his lips curl into a mischievous smile. "But… I bet we could make that guy you like jealous…"_

 _*****END FLASHBACK*****_

* * *

I notice Tris looking like she'd rather be absolutely _anywhere_ but in this hallway with the three of us. She's actually inching away. It reminds me of my cat, Ginger; Ginger is always trying to sneak into my lap, like she thinks I won't notice- not that I even understand why she thinks she has to be sneaky to begin with- and just puts her weight on one paw at a time _very slowly_ but it's not like no one notices. It's still obvious. That's what Tris's inching away thing is like. Uriah obviously notices it too and says, "Tris, just leave if this really bothers you so much."

"Jealousy doesn't look good on you, Uri," Tris hisses, getting up and pacing away. She plops down on the floor at the other end of the hall.

I laugh- or more like cackle. It's not actually funny, but I can't help being satisfied by seeing Uriah's little girlfriend so pissed off at him. I'd be pissed if I were her, too. He's acting like a jealous boyfriend over _me,_ even though I'm positive that the two of them have something between them.

"Now you're making your little girlfriend, uncomfortable, too," I say, and I notice Tris rolling her eyes all the way down the hall.

Uriah huffs. "I'm pretty sure Tris has already told you this," he says flatly, "but she isn't my girlfriend, Marlene. She's my friend." _Yeah, right. I call bullshit._ "And I'm not the one making sure to rub it in everyone's faces." Okay, it's true that Edward and I are rubbing our fake romance in his face, but it isn't like Tris and Uriah haven't made it obvious to the world. They may not have kissed, but she's a Stiff and he's always got his arm around her, or is hugging her… hell, she even stood out in the hall with him in nothing but a towel and kissed him on the cheek!

I blow my hair out of my face and sit up straighter. "Why does it even matter to you what I do, Uriah?!" I know it does. He makes it quite obvious how jealous he is. "How is it _any_ of your business what I do with Edward? Last I checked, we've only ever been friends, but you sure aren't acting like a _friend_ lately!"

We all stare each other down for a moment, and Uriah and I continue our unblinking glares at each other even after Four calls Edward. I don't even glance at him as he leaves to go through his simulation, and neither does Uriah.

It's Tris who breaks the silence. "You two are ridiculous," she mutters from down the hall.

And she's absolutely right. The way we've been treating each other is ridiculous. But she shouldn't pretend like she's had nothing to do with it. "Stay out of it, Stiff!" I shout at her. Surprise, surprise- Uriah rubs his face then gets up and walks down the hall and sits next to Tris. _Of-freaking-course he does,_ I think as I glare at them and watch them speak to each other in voices too quiet for me to understand what they're saying.

Tris's voice goes back to normal volume and she says, "Just make damn sure she knows not to tell anyone else. And stop all the goddamn fighting!" Uriah hugs her and hops up, coming back to sit across from me again, surprisingly. I really thought he'd stay with his little Stiff girlfriend.

"Mar," Uri says, his voice soft… pleading. "I'm sorry, Marlene." I've been wanting to hear those words… but I'm afraid to even believe them. I'm afraid he's going to hurt me. That I'll get my hopes up… and he will still be in love with Tris. So I scoff, and keep looking away from him so he can't see everything I am feeling. "Can we talk, after dinner or something?"

Now he wants to talk, huh? Where has he been the last two weeks? With the Stiff! As much as I have been waiting for this moment, right now I am just _mad._ Angry enough to mask all the hurt and longing, so I look at him. "Oh, now you want to _talk?_ " My voice is dripping with venom. "Right now, you're pretty much the last person I want to talk to, Uriah. Seriously, what makes you think you have the right to treat me the way you have been? You've been so goddamn spiteful that you threw my freaking cake away last night just because I was sharing it with Edward! I don't like this side of you, Uri, and I don't know what's going on, but right now, I really don't care. Just leave me the hell alone." _Don't listen to me, Uri. Don't give up on me. I'm just hurt. I still need you._

Uriah groans. "Come on, Mar! Can you just give me a goddamn chance, please? Neither of us are innocent in… whatever it is that's going on between us, and I told you I'd tell you everything. I'm trying to do that, okay? Just give me a chance, please." He's begging, but I can hear irritation behind it.

I scowl and look away from him, my arms crossed in front of my chest. I battle in my mind between my pride… and admitting that I'm wrong, too. I've been playing games, with what Edward and I have been doing. It's true… I haven't been that nice to him, either.

Then Tris calls out from down the hall, "Come on, Marlene. Let him explain." _What if what they've been saying this whole time is true, and they really are just friends?_ If they're together why would she want me to give him another chance? I'm sure she realizes I'm in love with him.

I glance at Tris warily, trying to read her face. She looks sincere. I'm still annoyed with Uriah but I'm definitely curious about what on earth has been going on with him if it isn't some romantic affair with the Stiff, and I definitely was curious about that conversation we overheard between Jeanine Matthews and Tris's brother at Erudite. I look at Uriah and let out an exaggerated sigh. "Fine, you're right," I say. "It's my fault, too. I'll listen. I owe you that much." And I do. We've been friends practically as long as I can remember.

Uriah grins and claps his hands together once. "All right! Great! You won't regret it. Well, I hope you won't, anyway. Just um… let me talk to Four next time he peeks his head out because I need his help to show you something." What the heck? What could he need Four's help with? I'm definitely curious now.

* * *

"Do you want to explain anything to her before I show her this?" Four asks Uriah. We are in the fear simulation room, though the day of training has been over for hours. Uriah promised to explain 'everything' but so far, he hasn't explained anything at all. He didn't even talk to me the whole way here, and he looks more nervous than I've ever seen him. He's literally wringing his hands. Uriah, my always-confident friend, standing there wringing his hands, without a hint of that cocky smile that's usually plastered across his face. Whatever this is… it's serious, and there is a reason he hasn't told me yet.

Uriah runs one hand through his hair. "I don't know, Four, is there really anything I can say that would make this any easier? You've been through this with Tris; tell me what to do." _What the hell is he talking about?!_

"Whatever it is, just tell me already!" I snap. I don't mean to, he's clearly already freaking out, but he's making me anxious, too.

Four sighs. "Maybe you should give her a very brief explanation of what she's about to see." Thanks, Four, let's get this show on the road.

Uriah now starts pacing back and forth. He's almost making me dizzy. He turns toward me and kneels in front of the chair I'm sitting on so abruptly that I jump slightly, and he takes my hands in his. "Marlene," he breathes, then he kind of opens and closes his mouth for a few seconds while he tries to get some words out. "Can you promise me- I mean, cross your heart and hope to die promise- that you will hear me out, everything I need to say, and not decide that it's all impossible from, like, the first sentence?"

"You're scaring me a little, Uriah." What the heck could be going on here?! He _has_ been acting… weird, lately, ever since around Choosing Day but I just thought it was his infatuation with Tris. It seems I was wrong- there has to be more to it. "But… yes, I will listen. I promise."

"Okay," he sighs, and looks at Four. Four nods. He still has his hard 'instructor' face on, but I can see that he's encouraging him to go on.

Then Four takes a breath and lets it out. "Marlene," he says, "I've heard the same basic thing Uriah is about to tell you, but from Tris. Well, mostly, Tris. The other night Uriah helped her fill me in more thoroughly. Anyway, I just want to tell you, it's going to be hard to understand… but I do believe them."

Uriah closes his eyes and just breathes for a moment. When he opens them, he finally begins to speak. "Tris and I both woke up on the day of the aptitude test from what seemed to be a really crazy dream. Both our dreams, or whatever this was, were unique to us each as we obviously experienced everything from different… perspectives, I guess… but everything also matches up. We went through the whole initiation, then there was a war. A lot of people died, Mar. At the end, Tris and I both died, and then we were in… in Heaven, I guess, and her parents were there. They had died at the beginning of the war. I- we- we didn't see any of... of our other friends who had died." Uh… okay? This is all about some weird dream? I mean, it is strange that he and Tris apparently had some sort of psychic connection… before they were even friends, I would assume… and dreamed the same thing.

Uriah breathes slowly for a minute, like he's trying to calm himself down, then continues. "Tris's mom told us that we could have another chance, that we could come back and start over and try to fix everything. We begged to be able to do that, and then we each woke up in our old rooms in our parents' homes the morning of the aptitude test." Uriah looks down and he rubs his thumbs back and forth on my hand, right where the webbing is between my index finger and thumb. "Remember how I knew Abnegation would jump first, Mar? And that the carousel would work? And I told you I was psychic?"

Uriah looks right into my eyes, pleading with me to understand what he is saying. I do remember the carousel, and that stupid bet with the cake. I do remember wondering how on earth he could have possibly in a million years guessed that a _Stiff_ would transfer to Dauntless at all, let alone jump first. I nod, very slowly and deliberately, not taking my eyes off of his because this is getting really, really weird.

"I knew Tris would jump first because we were already friends from that dream. We remembered each other at school the day of the aptitude test. I called her by a nickname- the name 'Tris', of course- which she hadn't made up yet, but which she remembered being called by for _months_ in the 'dream'." He makes air quotes with his fingers when he says 'dream'. "Whether this was a premonition… or it was all totally real and we really did go to Heaven and get sent back… I don't know. But things have happened the same, except for when we've done things differently. Little things can make big changes."

This… this is why he has spent so much time with Tris? Because she is the only one who understood? And there I was intentionally torturing him with Edward. Maybe he really _does_ care for me the way I care for him. I still really don't know what to make of what he's saying to me, but I can't deny that it would be an explanation for a lot of things that haven't made sense over the past few weeks.

I close my eyes before I ask, because I'm kind of afraid to know after all this. "What were you going to show me, Uriah?"

When I open my eyes, my jaw drops. Uriah has tears streaming down his face. I reach forward and brush them away with my thumbs, but they just keep coming. "My fear simulation from the first day of stage two," he chokes. "Only it is a memory. From… from before. It's how you died, Marlene." My eyes go wide with shock. He brought me here to _watch my own death?!_

I pull my hands from his without warning. "You brought me here to watch myself die? Why?!"

"Because I need you to know that this is for real, Marlene!" he almost yells. "I- I can't ever go through that again! I love you too much!"

I freeze. Like, completely freeze. I'm not even breathing. _Uriah just said he loves me. He loves me!_ I just… stare at him. I have no idea how long, but I just can't even move. And then his lips are on mine and everything is right. Nothing could be more right than the way this feels, like pins and needles everywhere.

When he pulls away, Uriah says, "Can you show her, Four? I- I can't watch this again. I know I'll have to in my Fear Landscape but I just…"

Four nods in understanding. "I wouldn't be able to watch this if it were Tris, and I'm not even sure I feel as… as much for her as you do for Marlene, yet." _Oh._ Tris really _isn't_ interested in Uriah. I get it. Tris… and Four. Wow, go Tris!

Four motions me over to the computer monitor. "This is just a recording of Uriah's fear simulation," he explains quietly as he inserts a little plastic thing with a metal tip into some slot in the computer. "You don't need the electrodes or anything, but I'm going to give you these headphones to listen with. I saw Uriah after he went through this simulation and if he watches it again right now or even hears it, I don't think he will be able to finish this conversation with you afterward." His eyes meet mine, and there is pain in them. He hands me the headphones, then presses his lips together in a straight line. "Are you ready?" I nod, and he finishes preparing the video. "Be brave," he murmurs, glancing at Uriah, and then he hits play.

I am so sucked into what's in front of me, I don't even glance at Uriah to see how he's handling everything. I don't understand what I'm seeing. I mean, I can clearly see that Hector, myself, and a little girl whose name I don't know are standing on the edge of the roof. The part I don't understand is why we are there, and I do not understand the vacant looks on our faces. Our eyes… we just look… dead already. Am I going to watch Hector die, too? My friend's little brother? God, I hope not.

A few other bodies come onto the screen, but just their backs. Both girls, a blond and one with dark hair and dark skin. When they glance at each other I realize that it's Tris and Christina. Then, I speak; I say something that I don't understand about Divergents and Erudite and my voice is monotone and robotic. Something is very, very wrong with me, Hector and the little girl.

When it happens, I gasp. All three of us step off the ledge. Christina and Tris dive at us, but they can't reach us all. Christina grabs the little girl and Tris grabs hold of Hector. He nearly pulls her over the edge, but Christina helps her drag him up. But me? I'm just gone. Just like Rita's sister when she didn't make the jump to the roof on Choosing Day. The simulation doesn't show the view over the edge of the roof, but I know what I would see if it did: limbs splayed out at odd angles, probably blood all around me. You don't survive a seven story free fall ending on asphalt.

The simulation ends, and I take off the headphones. I can't speak. I'm gasping for breath, breathing too fast, but I can't seem to get any oxygen. Uriah is across the room sobbing and Four is gripping my arms with his hands. His voice sounds a million miles away.

Slowly my breathing slows, my lungs begin to receive the oxygen they need, and Four's voice comes into focus. "...breathe. Just breathe, Marlene. Breathe."

When I can finally speak, I look back and forth between Uriah and Four. "What was that?! Why… why was I like that?!"

"You were in a simulation," Four answers. "Tris… Tris turned herself in at Erudite the next day, from what Uriah has told me. She knew they'd kill her and she went anyway. She couldn't live with the guilt. She still feels guilty for having to choose between you and Hector. They tested her like a lab rat, they tortured her, and we managed to get her out, apparently. Only to have her and Uriah die a few months later, outside the fence."

Uriah is beginning to calm down, and Four looks between us. "Why don't you two go to my place and talk. I'll leave you alone for a while there, give you some privacy, just lock the door when you leave, okay?" Uriah nods gratefully as he crosses the room to me and pulls me into his arms.

But, though it hurts to do it… I push him away. "Thanks Four, but… no. No, I don't want to go talk right now," I say. I can't believe after I have so desperately wanted to be with Uriah for so long, I am actually saying this. But everything he's saying… it's all completely crazy! It's impossible! And seriously what the _hell,_ he just made me _watch myself die._ This is all kinds of screwed up. "I… I need some time to think," I choke out, turning towards the door.

Someone grabs my arm, and I'm surprised when I turn to see it's Four, his eyes looking utterly panicked. "Marlene," he says, "I need you to _promise_ me that you won't say anything about _any_ of this, or about me and Tris, none of it, not to anyone. Not to Shauna, not to Lynn, not to Edward… no one. Please." I know Four took a big risk by letting me in on his secret about him and Tris, and I know that she and Uriah would probably end up institutionalized if I told anyone what they believed, because everyone would think they are crazy. Maybe they are, but I still won't do that to Uriah. He's still one of my best friends.

"I promise," I say. "I swear, Four. I won't say anything. To anyone." He nods and lets go of me. I glance over my shoulder once at Uriah, then I walk away, leaving him broken behind me.


	19. Chapter 18

**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN**

 _ **Marlene**_

I sit alone on the roof. Alone… it's fitting; I feel so alone in everything Uriah just told me. I promised Four I wouldn't breathe a word of it to anyone, and I intend to keep that promise, but that just leaves me with so _much_ just… swirling around in my head, crowding out every rational thought.

Is this how Uriah has felt the past few weeks? And Tris, too? After that whole confession of Uriah's today, I do believe him at least about his feelings for me. Four's reaction made it clear that he does really care about Tris- he's probably in love with her, actually. He didn't say so and probably doesn't even know it yet, but I saw the look in his eyes when he imagined watching Tris die.

"There you are," says a familiar voice from behind me. Edward soon plops down next to me. "Where did you go? Is everything okay?"

I don't answer for a while, and he doesn't push me. That's one of the things I love about my friendship with Edward- he seems to know when to just wait and to allow the silence. I lay back on the roof and stare at the stars, and Edward soon does the same.

"Uriah is in love with me," I finally say, "but it's… it's just all really complicated."

"Because of Tris?" Edward asks after a pause. I'm not sure how to answer. It does have to do with Tris, but not in the way that Edward is thinking, and I promised not to tell him about the issues that are making this so complicated.

I shrug. "Sort of… but not like that. Uriah and Tris really are just friends, it turns out. I guess everything- that they were never together at all, that Tris actually does want to be friends, I guess- was the truth. There are just… some things that they have been through together, _as friends,_ and I don't know if I can… get past it all, I guess. I'd really like to talk to you about it but I made a promise- to someone else involved in the whole situation- that I wouldn't."

Edward turns his head to look at me. He has beautiful blue eyes and his hair is messy in a really cute way. Right now… right now I _wish_ that things could work out that way for Edward and me. He is handsome, smart, and he 'gets me'. It would just be so much easier, so much less complicated, than this mess with Uriah. Unfortunately, I know that there's just nothing there between Edward and me. Friends is all we will ever be. I guess sometimes love isn't easy. Sometimes, it's something you have to fight for. Maybe the fight is what makes it really worth it. Maybe it will make us stronger.

"If you need to talk about it, I promise not to repeat anything you say," he offers.

God, it's tempting. It really is. It would be a relief to just let the words all fall out of my mouth, to have someone to help me talk it through. I won't break Four and Uriah's trust like that, though, no matter how badly I want to. I shake my head. "I really can't," I whisper.

Edward sighs. I know it isn't irritation that he doesn't have the latest gossip; he's just concerned about me. "Did you tell Uriah that we aren't together, I hope?"

My eyes shoot open. _Oh God, I didn't, did I?!_ "No, I was distracted and… didn't think to." My voice is a little shaky. I can't believe I didn't tell him that! And right now, I am just not ready to face him again. "I guess I will just have to tell him when I'm ready to talk to him again," I sigh.

"Well…" Edward trails off. "If you change your mind, I'm around. C'mon, it's getting late." He stands and holds one hand out to pull me up. "We should get back to the dormitory." I smile and accept his hand, but as I walk back with Edward, I'm starting to feel really badly about making Uriah so jealous.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

"Give it to me!" I'm fuming, trying to hold myself back from making Peter's black eye even blacker, as he holds the paper he has been reading the Erudite article from above his head, too high for me to reach. I know I shouldn't let him get to me. I know what Erudite is trying to do with these articles. But going to reporters, making up lies about signs of my father having abused me is just too much right now. Tobias and I haven't really made up from when I slept at his apartment. It's been two whole days now and the longer this silence goes on, the more I feel like I'm about to shatter… or explode.

Peter smirks at me. "And what do you plan to do about it, _little girl?"_ He snorts and snickers at his own lame insult.

I snort. "Nice try, Peter, but I've kicked your pathetic ass twice now." I may have proved that I can hold my own against Peter, but that doesn't mean I want to have to repeat my performance for a third time. I'm just asking for trouble; I know it, yet I just can't seem to help myself.

To my surprise, as Edward comes through the door, he barely glances at the scene before storming over to Peter and snatching the article right out of his hand. I may be too short, but Edward certainly isn't. I'm not sure if he's trying to help me… or if he hates me because Marlene does and just wants to help Peter torment me.

Edward's lips move slightly as he silently reads the article. When he finishes, he crumples it somewhat as he drops his hand to his side. "So, it seems Molly and Peter have been telling reporters that Tris talks in her sleep about something she doesn't want her dad to do to her." He glares around the room at all the transfers with his eyes narrowed. He actually kind of reminds me of Tobias right now. It's like a perfect Instructor Four impersonation.

His glare stops on Peter and Molly for several seconds before he continues. "Has anyone heard Tris say stuff like that in her sleep? Anyone who _doesn't_ have an immature personal grudge on Tris, that is?" No one says a word, and Christina and Will are shaking their heads while shooting a deathly glare at Peter. "Me either," Edward says.

Edward turns to Peter. "You are a _coward,_ Peter. _You_ are the one who doesn't belong here, not Tris. Which she's made pretty damn clear, by the way, the two times she's beaten the shit out of you, despite being half your size. But since you _still_ won't just leave her the hell alone…"

Without even finishing his sentence, Edward strikes. Edward is far superior in hand to hand combat over any of the other transfers, probably even equal to Uriah. I certainly wouldn't stand a chance against him, though I can definitely beat Peter. There's nothing fair about this fight… but I really don't care. Peter brought it on himself. He deserves it.

Edward's fist collides with Peter's jaw with such force that he practically goes flying across the room. I don't feel sorry for Peter, but I also don't much want to watch this. I turn my back to the fight happening several yards away from me, still clearly hearing the grunts, moans and screams coming from Peter, as well as the thuds of Edward's fists and feet and the occasional crunching sound. "I'd rather just get out of here for a while," I tell Christina tiredly. "I'd even go shopping. Come on."

Christina's whole face lights up, though she's still a little distracted by the fight. I nudge Will. "Can you make sure that Peter makes it to the infirmary?" I may not like the guy, but I don't want him dead. Besides, he did help me in Erudite. "And tell Edward I said thank you?" Will nods, probably just relieved to have an excuse not to be dragged to the shops with us. I just have to get out of here. I wish I could just disappear for a while, or sleep for a week, but since that can't happen, Christina can do what best friends are great at and distract me.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

During initiation, I am not scheduled for any shifts in the control room, but I still come to watch the screens and offer to relieve my coworkers early here and there. I'm a naturally suspicious person- that's why I chose to work in intelligence. I don't naturally trust my leaders the way the Dauntless-born generally do, so I keep an eye on what's going on around the compound, the city, and especially the leadership offices. This, of course, is how I knew something was going on, leading me to hatch that plan to spy on Max.

Tonight, I came in and only two others were here, neither of which pay me any attention, which is perfect for what I am planning to work on tonight. I have been discreetly hiding saved clips from security footage of Max and Eric's offices- specifically, meetings with Jeanine Matthews. Often their conversations are, for lack of a better term, coded, but the conspiracy between them is clear whether you can understand their 'code' or not- hopefully clear enough to put them under truth serum once they try to execute their attack. My hope is that we can find some way to shut it down quickly, and with how much information Uriah and Tris have about _how_ this will all go down, I'm feeling reasonably confident that we can do it. After all, Tris says that she and I did it before, and that was without the knowledge that is giving us an advantage this time around.

I've gotten all the files copied to the first flash drive, and am waiting for them to copy to a second- I just want to be sure we have a backup copy or two, and I will hide them in different places or maybe even give one to Tris or Uriah- when I notice a screen near me flash to the hallway my apartment is in. I notice because there is someone knocking on my door. The camera is down the hall from my apartment, so usually I would have to isolate the footage and zoom in to see who it is, but I would recognize her tiny figure and blond hair anywhere.

Tris and I haven't really talked since she stayed over two nights ago. Yesterday, that was fine, because I was still pretty upset with her for keeping so much from me. I don't understand why she can't just trust me. It seems to me that with all our history- at least, all the history that _she_ remembers- she should know me well enough to be able to tell me things. Then again, it sounds like we went through a fairly significant rough patch at the end. I'm also beginning to notice how unsure Tris tends to be of herself, and I guess I shouldn't be surprised by this- she did grow up in Abnegation after all- but she has always seemed so confident for an Abnegation-born that I forget, sometimes, that she didn't grow up with her parents praising her every move like Zeke and Uriah did.

Today, I've been longing to see her all day and just get past this. Forgiveness is usually hard for me, but somehow I have already grown to need her, and holding onto anger over what I know had to be an impossibly difficult situation for her to navigate just doesn't seem worth it.

I see Tris look around quickly to be sure she is alone, then walk down the hall to a storage closet. I know exactly what she is doing, and there are only two minutes left on this file transfer to the second flash drive. As I wait for it to finish, I watch her emerge from the storage closet, smiling slightly and waving at the camera as she walks back to my apartment door, and I chuckle. She really does know me, doesn't she? I'll bet she checked my spot at the chasm, then knew the next most likely place I would go was the control room. The file transfer finishes just after she unlocks the apartment door with the spare key I don't remember ever showing her. I close out my computer and turn off the monitor, make sure the two flash drives are tucked safely in my pocket, and head home.

* * *

The door is unlocked, so I don't need to take the time to get out my key. Tris rolls off my bed and comes to the door to greet me as I enter my apartment and shut the door behind me.

"Hey, baby," I say softly, wrapping my arms around her and burying my nose in her hair. "I saw that you remembered where the key I never showed you was," I chuckle.

"Sorry, I hope you don't mind," she says into my chest.

I shake my head as I pull away from her and lead her to sit on the bed with me. "Not at all."

Tris looks down at her hands as she picks at her cuticles. "I'm sorry," she says softly. "I should have told you everything sooner. I just… when I got here I was so excited to see you, and I knew it wouldn't be easy, but then I screwed it all up the very first night when you found Uri and me by the Chasm. I was just afraid that when you knew everything that I had done… that I don't know… it would scare you away."

I sigh. "It sounded like just about everything you did was out of selflessness, and that's one of the things I lo-" I clear my throat. What just almost came out of my mouth?! "-like most about you," I tell her. "I was angry, yeah. But I… I really care about you, Tris, and I want this to work. So maybe we can just work on trusting each other and being honest, and talking about things instead of running away." She nods, still looking down. I wrap my fingers around her chin and make her look at me. "Tris. Let's just forgive each other and move on. But seriously, don't leave me again this time around. Promise me."

"I promise, Tobias," she says in a clear, strong voice. "Believe me, I learned my lesson when I died." A shiver runs down my spine, just as it does every time she says something like that. "I love you," she whispers, and I crash my lips to hers. My hands grip her waist, and her fingers tug at my hair. Her tongue grazes my lower lip and as I part my lips further to grant her entrance, I slowly lower her back onto the bed. Our kiss deepens, full of passion as I hover over her.

My hands seem to move without my brain telling them what to do. It turns out, when I'm not thinking so hard, I am a lot more daring than I thought, and after running them up and down her sides slowly, I find my hands sliding up her stomach, under her shirt. She moans as my hands graze her breasts. I cup them tentatively, and it registers in my brain exactly how I am touching her. My breath hitches in my throat and my pants have gotten really uncomfortably tight. I know she feels it, and her hands move to my butt.

Then it's like she realizes very suddenly how intense this has gotten, and she pulls away. I rest my forehead against hers, my eyes closed, breathing heavily. I have never wanted someone the way I want her.

"Tobias," she says almost painfully. "We never finished talking about… um… well, where we stand with… all this."

This is probably not the kind of conversation that we should have with me pressed up against her like this. I force myself to sit up and scoot a few inches away from her, and she sits up and pushes her shirt down before finger-combing the tangles out of her hair.

"So… um… how are you feeling about… us and our… physical relationship?" I ask her. I look at her to try and read her face. She is biting her lower lip. Does she have any idea how sexy she is when she does that?

She worries her lip for another moment, and takes a deep breath. "It really depends on you. I mean, I know you're probably _ready_ in a sense, but before when we were together… we were so sure of our love for one another. I still am, but it's different for you. I just want you to be sure of your feelings and commitment first. I don't do casual sex. I already love you, but I need you to love me, too."

I don't do casual sex, either. I think she knows that. After all, she was my first kiss. "That is fair. And wise," I tell her. I take a breath and gather my courage. "I'm falling for you, Tris. But you're right, we aren't ready yet. It's going to be hard to be wise, though," I say with a smirk.

Tris laughs. "Trust me… it will get harder every time you push me down on this bed." I don't doubt that. "We can still do plenty of _this,_ though." She leans in and kisses me again, and I pull her into my lap. My hands are sliding up her back, her bare skin sending electricity into me, when we are interrupted by a knock at the door.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

I would never exactly expect Four to jump for joy seeing me at his doorstep as we really aren't close- with him, hardly anyone is- but he looks more irritated than I would have expected. When I see Tris, the messy, tangled state of both their hair makes it obvious that I interrupted something.

"Uh… should I leave?" Tris asks nervously. Four looks to me, and I shrug. "I'll… I will just go."

She slips on her shoes and is about to walk out the door, but I grab her arm. "Your hair, Tris," I say with a small smile, and her hands go immediately to her hair as her face turns nearly as red as a tomato, and she rushes into what I can only assume is the bathroom.

"So…" Four says awkwardly, shoving his hands into his pants pockets. "I guess you're here to talk about what Uriah told you the other day?" I nod as I glance around the room. I've never been inside of Four's apartment before. He isn't really one to throw parties or anything, so I've never had a reason to. It's the plainest apartment I've ever been in. There are no knick-knacks, only the bare minimum of furniture. He doesn't even have a couch.

Four motions to the small dining room table and I cross to it and sit in one of the chairs just as Tris comes out of the bathroom. "So, um… thanks, Mar," she says quietly as she approaches us. I smile and nod at her. Tris bends slightly- Four is enough taller than her that even sitting in a chair while she stands, Tris doesn't have to bend very far- and kisses him. Four's arm wraps around her waist and his hand squeezes her hip lightly.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he murmurs, and she nods. Four's eyes follow her, and a moment later, I hear the front door gently click shut.

I can't help commenting- I have never seen this side of Four before. "You two seem really sweet together." He smiles a little and looks down at his hands as if he's embarrassed.

I may as well just come out with it and get this conversation going. "So… everything Uriah said… it seems crazy. Impossible."

Four laughs. "Yeah, it does," he agrees. "I won't pretend to understand _how_ they both… experienced all that they did. But I know that they both seem to know an awful lot that can't be explained, and they seem to be very sure about it."

That's the part I can't get past. Uriah _does_ seem to know a lot of things that I can't explain. And Four is right, Uri seems to be absolutely certain about it all. I've fallen for plenty of Uriah's pranks, but unless his acting skills have improved by a factor of ten overnight, he's not acting.

"What did Tris say that made you believe her?"

Four studies my face for a while like he's trying to decide how to answer. "No one here really knows anything about my past. Even Zeke knows very little. He doesn't even know my real name," he begins. I wonder why Four is so secretive? If he doesn't tell me now, though, I know I won't ever get it out of him, so there's no point in trying. "I took Tris into my fear landscape. The last fear, my fourth fear, is when she would have figured it out, but she accidentally called me by my real name during the third fear."

"I'm sure there are other ways she could have found out," I argue.

Four nods. "Yes, there probably are. But it was when I confronted her on it that she told me everything." He takes a deep breath. "Then she said something else that I haven't been able to come up with _any_ explanation for. You know that Uriah said there was going to be a war, right?" I nod. I suppose that's a part of why I don't want to believe him. The idea of that, it's pretty scary. "Well, I had suspected something like that for a while. I work in the control room for a reason, Marlene. I'm not as trusting as most people. I had gotten Lauren to write me a program to mirror Max's computer so I could snoop around on it from a remote location. I told her it was to prank Zeke."

I laugh, and he smiles momentarily as he continues. "The night that Tris told me about all this, it was the night before I had planned to install this program. I had not told _anyone_ about it- and you better not either, I don't need to be tried as a traitor, okay?"

I roll my eyes. "I'm no traitor either, not to my faction but also not to my friends. If you guys are right, it's my leaders that are about to betray _me._ I wouldn't do that to you, Four."

Four continues, "Tris asked me about my mirroring program. She wanted to know if I had done it yet. She said that I told her about it later, and told me what I said I had found. Then she offered to help. She and Uriah helped me get the program installed- and almost got caught in the process. But then, when I got a chance to actually look… I found exactly what she said I would. Marlene, absolutely _no one_ knew I was going to do that. That isn't the kind of plan I would let someone in on. I mean, hell, Zeke is my best friend and he doesn't even know my real name, so clearly I wouldn't go blabbing about something like this."

We sit in silence for a few minutes as I think about what he has just said to me. I search for any possible explanation for Tris to know that. She could maybe know what he would find, if she was actually somehow involved with whatever the leaders are planning… but that still wouldn't explain her knowing that Four intended to spy and how intended to do it. And my mind keeps coming back to the bet in which I lost a month of Dauntless cake.

"Besides Tris, how many other Stiffs have transferred to Dauntless?" I ask. Four flinches and I could swear I see a flash of panic in his eyes, but it's gone as quickly as it came.

"One," he says quietly. Something nags at the edges of my mind, as if I'm missing something I should try to figure out, but I push it away. It doesn't feel relevant to the problem I'm trying to work through right now.

I sigh and lean my head into my hands, my eyes closed. I don't want any of this to be true. I don't want that death scene I watched, with my vacant eyes as I fell seven stories and went splat on the street, to be true, nor the war, being betrayed by my faction, Uri and Tris's eventual deaths… none of it. But I can't deny it any more. I know deep down that Uriah would not make something like this up, and he wouldn't tell me if he weren't positive. He's my best friend and the boy I love. I have to trust him.

"This is so messed up," I whisper. "There's no way he could have known, is there? He knew a Stiff was gonna jump first."

Four snorts. "Yeah, well, a Stiff as first jumper, that literally is a first. The other Stiff that transferred jumped last, actually." I laugh. Four's eyes grow serious. "Look, Marlene, I know that this is crazy, and it's overwhelming. And trust me, I know better than anyone… it's really complicated trying to navigate a relationship with someone who has had been through it all with you, but it hasn't happened to you yet. In fact, Tris and I had a big fight about that a couple days ago. You kind of walked in on us making up." His cheeks are turning pink, and I smirk.

"Uh, yeah, sorry about that," I chuckle.

Four shrugs. "Hey, you probably saved us from losing control and doing something we aren't quite ready for yet. It worked out well, really."

I stand. I can tell that Four isn't used to having people over, and now that I don't need to ask him anything else, I should go. Four follows me to the door. I start to open it, but he stops me. "If you need to talk again… look, I'm not great at this stuff. But I can try, if you're really ever desperate enough to chance it." He's wearing a lopsided smile on his face, and I chuckle.

"Thanks, Four." Once the door closes behind me, I lean against the stone wall of the hallway, wondering what exactly I should say to Uri.


	20. Chapter 19

**CHAPTER NINETEEN**

 _ **Tobias**_

I really wanted to see Tris again tonight, but she's off with her friends. I decided that I should take her cue and remember that I have friends, too.

"Do my eyes deceive me, or is the mighty Four standing at my doorstep for the first time in over a week?" Zeke says with a grin when he answers the door. "You brought beer! You know the way to my heart, don't ya?" I laugh and nod as I brush past him on my way to the fridge.

Zeke catches the beer I toss to him and I take out one for myself before putting the rest in the fridge. I sprawl out on the couch, sighing as I relax my head back on the top of the cushions, and Zeke sits at the other end, leaning forward with his forearms resting on his knees. "Where you been lately, man?" he asks. "Just holed up in your apartment?"

"Something like that," I answer.

"I'll never understand you and all that time you spend alone," Zeke grumbles, and I snort, but not for the reason he thinks.

My head turns at Shauna's voice as she comes out of the bedroom. I didn't know she was here. "So, Jason asked about Tris," she singsongs, stopping when she sees me on the couch. "Oh, hi Four! I didn't know you were here." I nod and hold up one hand in a lazy wave to greet her as I take a swig of beer. "More beer in the fridge?"

"Yep," Zeke says. "Four is now forgiven for his recent antisocial behavior." Shauna laughs as she crosses to the kitchen.

My mind is still on what Shauna was saying before she saw me sitting here. "So you're still trying to set Tris up with that guy? Why?!" I cringe at my tone and Zeke raises his eyebrows.

"I think the bigger question is… why do you care?" I just scowl at him. "If I didn't know better, I'd think you have a little crush." _Oh, it's more than a little crush._

I glare at my beer bottle for a moment before finishing it off in a few gulps and standing up. "I need another beer if this is how you're going to be."

I had hoped that by the time I got back with my fresh beer- and another for Zeke- that he would have dropped it, but luck is not on my side today. "Seriously, man, since when do you care who your initiates- or any girl, really- date?" He smirks. "You _do_ have a crush, don't you?!"

Shauna sits hip to hip with Zeke and he rests his arm across her shoulders. "Four _likes_ someone?! Who! Tell me!" She's so excited that she is actually bouncing up and down.

"Admit it, Four! Tell her. Tell her about the cute little thing that has finally caught your attention." Zeke's eyes glint with amusement and that damn smirk is still plastered across his face.

I groan and run both hands over my face. They're never going to let this go. I know it. I may as well give in. Tris had suggested I tell them, anyway, and she's right, they are trustworthy. Besides, maybe they'll stop trying to set her up on dates with other guys.

"Fine," I sigh. Shauna squeals and claps her hands together, and Zeke grins. "I admit it. I like her." Shauna is about to explode with curiosity. I look right at her when I say… "Tris."

Shauna's jaw drops and she gasps. "Tris?! The little Stiff? The one who likes Uriah?!"

"Yes, but she doesn't like Uriah," I smirk "They really _are_ just friends." Shauna eyes me suspiciously, but I'm not giving anything else away until she comes out and asks. It's too much fun, dragging this out like I am. I stare back and raise an eyebrow, daring her to come out with it.

Zeke laughs. "I think Four has more to tell us. So, pray tell, Almighty Four, how are you so sure about that?"

"Well," I say, "at least she had better not have feelings for Uriah, considering she's already _my_ girlfriend." At that, Shauna actually claps her hand over her mouth, and I can't hold myself back from laughing any more.

"Shut up!" Shauna practically screams, hitting my arm. "You _finally_ got yourself a girlfriend?! I thought this day would never come. Oh my God! But what about Marlene?! She still thinks Uriah is in love with Tris! We have to do something about this!"

"Slow down, babe," Zeke chuckles. "You're not going to run out the door and find Mar right now. I'm sure Four doesn't want anyone else knowing about this rather inappropriate relationship, anyway." _Damn right I don't. Not while I'm her instructor._

I clearly need to give Shauna a little more information before she does something that gets me in trouble. "Shauna, you don't need to worry about that. Marlene knows about me and Tris, and she knows Uriah is in love with her. Just let them sort themselves out."

Well, that didn't go over as well as I expected. Now they both look hurt. "You told _Marlene_ of all people but not us?!" Shauna exclaims, at the same time as Zeke bursts out with, "how do you know this about _my_ brother and I don't?!"

I can't tell them about… everything. Uriah and Tris would kill me if I did that without their permission, and it is unlikely that Zeke and Shauna would believe me anyway. I don't even know how _I_ have managed to believe it. "I'm their instructor. I run all their fear sims, and you know I care about Uriah, too, Zeke. I talk to them more than you think. I won't share their business any further than what I have already said. I let Uriah tell Marlene about Tris and me to help him out, and Uriah knows about us because he and Tris are really good friends. Actually, I'm pretty sure he is the only one she talks to about us." I take a few more sips of beer waiting for them to say something, but apparently they are speechless.

"So… are you two just going to sit there and stare at me all night, or what? Because if so, I'll just take my beer and go home."

My friends finally snap out of it. "We're happy for you, man," Zeke says, smiling and shaking his head. "Let us know if you need any help sneaking around with her." We both laugh, and finally the couple moves on to other topics.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

I like to lay in the net- the one I jumped into on Choosing Day- when I want to be alone and think. Today, I am laying here thinking about Marlene. Two days have passed since I told her everything. _Everything._ All the things I was so afraid to tell her, but I finally took a leap of faith and trusted her with all of it. I trusted her to understand. Marlene has been my best friend pretty much forever, and when I told her the biggest, deepest, scariest secrets I have ever had, she just walked out the door.

She hasn't spoken to me since. Not a single word.

My sleep has been restless and unsatisfying. It's catching up to me, but I don't have a clue what to do about it. Last night that first fear simulation- the one I showed her the other day, the one where I watch the girl I love step off a ledge and fall to her death- haunted my dreams. The night before, all I dreamed of was that amazing kiss we shared in the simulation room, but then she didn't talk to me the next day like I had hoped she would, and the memory of that kiss only made it all more painful. Tris invited me to get tattoos with Christina, Will and her tonight, but I passed. I just wanted to be alone tonight.

I'm considering going to the infirmary for sleeping pills- though I'm a little afraid to, because what if they just trap me in the nightmares I had last night and instead I just can't wake up?- when I see something above me. My eyes widen and I scramble to the edge of the net as if my life depends on it when I realize that someone just jumped and mere seconds from now, will land right where I have been laying.

I can't get out fast enough, but I am at least at the edge when the body hits the net. My fingers tighten on the rope as the jumper bounces a few times, narrowly keeping myself out of her way. When her body settles in the net, she sighs, and right as she looks at me and gasps, I finally see that it was none other than the person who I was laying here moping about: Marlene.

For the first time in over forty-eight hours, she speaks to me. "Oh my God, Uri, I didn't know you were down here! Are you okay?! I could have hurt you!"

"You could have," I chuckle, "but you didn't." I sit up and scratch the back of my neck awkwardly. "Uh… so… I guess I'll just go, then."

I start to climb out of the net, but Marlene's hand grips my wrist. I close my eyes as my skin prickles with goosebumps at her touch and my whole body feels like I am going to melt, like I could just turn into liquid and drip right through this net. "Don't go," Marlene whispers, and I open my eyes and look at her.

Marlene's curly hair is windswept and wild. Her lips are a little chapped, as if she has been chewing on them too much, and her eyes are round as saucers with a hint of fear in them. And she is still beautiful. Still perfect.

I nod and let myself settle back into the net; she lays next to me, and the only thing I can focus on is how our bodies touch, shoulder to shoulder, hip to hip. We don't speak, but it doesn't feel like the silence that has tormented me for the past two days. This silence is comfortable… peaceful. Still, I have missed her voice, and it feels so good to hear it again that I close my eyes when she finally speaks.

"Thank you for giving me some time to think about everything you said, Uriah. I'm ready to talk now, and I-" she takes a deep breath. "I believe you."

I squeeze my eyes shut to keep in the happy, relieved tears that want to escape, and my lips turn up in a smile. I sigh as she scoots closer to me and rests her head on my shoulder. I sit up slightly to pull my arm out from under us and wrap it around her back and waist, pulling her back down to me before I kiss her forehead, which she responds to with a contented little humming noise.

"What changed your mind?" I ask.

"I talked to Four. Asked him how he knew for sure. But… but I always knew, deep down, that you would never make something like that up, and that you wouldn't tell me if you weren't positive that it was true." She takes a really deep breath and holds it for a second. "And because I love you, too. I always have, really." Her voice drops to a whisper now. "You're it for me, Uri."

Then her lips are on mine and her body rolls on top of me. This kiss is full of passion, full of love, it's like we are pouring in everything we have been holding back for I don't even know how long. A long, long time, that's all I know. Guys will always warn you about ending up in the 'friend zone' and yeah, that transition from friends to lovers is a little tricky and awkward- this is my second time through it (both with the same person, weird as that is), so I would know.

But the other thing I know is that there is nothing more amazing than falling in love with your best friend. It's like starting on the fiftieth date. We already know each other inside and out, we already know how to fight and come back to each other, and we already know with absolute certainty that we love each other in a way that consumes us completely.

"I've missed you so much," I mumble against her lips as we very briefly come up for air, then quickly fit my lips back against hers and she kisses back immediately. Our tongues explore each others mouths, and I roll us so I hover over her, my hands gripping the ropes of the net as her hands slide down my back, resting on my ass. Soon our hands are everywhere, though over our clothes, and we whisper I love yous to one another sporadically.

Marlene doesn't stop me when I slide my hand under her shirt. Our kisses have become desperate. My hand has just touched the wire on her bra when a thought stops me dead in my tracks, and I pull away and sit up.

"Uri?" Marlene says breathlessly. "What's the matter?"

I glare down at my bitten-down fingernails. "What about Edward?" I spit out bitterly. "I mean, I am in love with you, Marlene, and I'm just… absolutely desperate for you… but I won't be _that_ guy. The one who sneaks around with someone else's girlfriend."

Marlene's hand softly rests on my shoulder and I tense at her touch. What was I thinking? What was _she_ thinking? I never thought Marlene was the type of girl who would cheat!

"Uriah, look at me."

Reluctantly, I do. Her expression is so soft, and a little guilty, but also slightly… amused? Seriously? This is funny to her? I have to force myself not to get out of this net and walk away right now.

Marlene sighs. "Please don't be angry with me, Uri. I meant to tell you the other day, but I just… never did, with all the news you shared with me. Edward and I are only friends. That's all we have ever been."

My eyebrows knit together in confusion. I realize that it looked to her like Tris and I were together so maybe I shouldn't be judging, but she and Edward have been so in-your-face about it all. I never saw them kiss, but they are always whispering to each other, his arm is always wrapped around her like a couple, just… everything. I've even seen them holding hands. "I don't understand," I finally say.

"I thought you were with Tris and I was jealous," she admits. "Edward and I… we kissed once. Just once. It just kind of… happened. And I'm glad it did." She just spent the last like half hour making out with me, telling me loves me, and she is _glad they kissed?!_ I'm sure that the hurt is plain on my face as she rushes to elaborate. "We kissed and it was like kissing my cousin or something. There is absolutely _nothing_ there. For either of us. Honestly… and I feel guilty about it, but also not because it worked... " She chuckles as I try to push down anger. "It was all an act. He was helping me make you jealous."

I stare at her. "For real?" She nods. I loved her and wanted her and knew it that whole time. It was her not trusting Tris and me that caused all this. She didn't need to do that. It did give me the kick in the pants I needed, though, and it seems like he is a good friend to her. I _am_ glad that she had that, if any of this was even half as painful for her as it was for me. "I'm a little upset, but I'll get over it, then. I've been apart from you for way too long to waste another day being mad when we really just wanted the same thing. And now we finally have it."

And before she can respond, my lips crash to hers again.


	21. Chapter 20

**CHAPTER TWENTY**

 _ **Tris**_

The knives hit the target in time with my breaths. I always watched Tobias carefully during training, even after I knew how to do everything, and that is how I learned his technique. Every second exhale, I release the knife from my fingertips, inhaling and passing the next knife to my right hand as the previous knife buries itself in the target. I only interrupt the rhythm to pull the knives from the target and begin again each time I run out of knives after throwing all five.

The repetition creates a sort of soothing cadence, steady and predictable, releasing a bit of my frustration and tension with each knife as it leaves my fingertips. The stage two rankings were revealed about an hour ago, and just like last time, Peter managed to turn my friends against me. I know they'll be over it tomorrow, but that knowledge does nothing to keep my anger and frustration away.

I have hit the center of the target dozens and dozens of times and actually do feel much better when Uriah, Marlene, Edward and Lynn enter the training room, bringing their choruses of happy chatter with them.

"There you are!" Uriah says brightly, his contagious grin lighting up his face.. "I was hoping we'd find you on our way here, but I guess you were a step ahead of us."

I furrow my eyebrows, confused as to why they were hoping to find me, as Marlene crosses the room to the targets, a muffin in hand. "Ah," I mumble. "Right, the muffin." Uriah grins.

"Wow, you've got some aim, Tris," Marlene calls with a smile as she examines the target I have been using. All five knives are sticking out of the center of the bullseye, closely grouped together.

A nervous knot forms in my stomach when Marlene speaks to me, and I almost flinch. Things have been so rocky between the two of us since I came back. I know she dislikes me, and I hate that someone as sweet and kind as Marlene has such a misguided impression of me, but she was nice to me the other day at Tobias's, too, and she and Uriah even seem to be getting along. I know he told her everything the other day, but last I talked to him, she wasn't even speaking to him. But I'm not Beatrice from Abnegation any more, I am _Tris,_ first ranked Dauntless initiate, and I won't let the cruel words she has directed at me these past few weeks weaken me. With that resolve, I respond confidently, with a smile. "Thanks, Marlene."

"Why aren't you out celebrating?" Lynn asks me. "I heard you were ranked first."

"The other transfers are jealous," Edward says, rolling his eyes.

Uriah winks at me. "Tris is too Dauntless for them."

Edward ranked second among the transfers, outdone only by me. While Peter is probably plotting to kill us both, and Will and Christina stalked off pouting that I hadn't shared the 'secret strategies' I supposedly (according to Peter) have for getting through sims quickly, Edward defended me, literally pulling Peter off of me, then making some sarcastic remark to Christina and Will about them being jealous… and that it was too bad they weren't as loyal of friends as I deserved. I never got to know Edward well before, and I still don't, but he is not the person he became when factionless with Evelyn. Here at Dauntless, he seems like someone I would actually like to be friends with.

I grin. "Damn right, I am," I say.

Marlene gasps jokingly, but she still has that toothy smile that I can't help picturing anytime I think of her. "Did I just hear the Stiff swear?! Shame, shame, little miss Abnegation."

"I guess everyone will just have to admit that I'm not a Stiff any more, won't they?" I smirk.

Uriah shakes his head, laughing. "I'm pretty sure that deep down, you've always been Dauntless, Tris. Now shut up and let me shoot at you, Mar!"

I don't ask questions, because I already know the answers. Instead I nudge Edward with my elbow while Uriah prepares to shoot and Marlene balances the muffin on her head. "Thanks for standing up for me earlier," I say quietly. "The other day, too."

Edward smiles. "You did save me from being blind, or worse, Tris. I hate Peter as much as you do."

"Fair enough, but I didn't do anything big. I think any decent person who notices someone else might be in danger would do the same, don't you?"

"Maybe in Abnegation," Edward laughs. "You don't give yourself enough credit, Tris."

"We both win!" I hear Mar shout from across the training room as she picks up the muffin from the floor and dusts it off with her fingers, then breaks off a piece and pops it in her mouth. She crosses to me and Edward, and Uriah starts shooting more plastic pellets from his gun, hitting the target with impressive accuracy, when Marlene is out of the way.

"Can we talk, Tris?" Marlene asks. She looks nervous, almost guilty. She chews on one fingernail and her eyes are almost pleading. I thought she hated me?

I stare at her for a second then realize I need to answer. "Uh… sure, of course," I respond before following Marlene to the other side of the training room, near the punching bags. We both sit on the floor with our backs against the wall; I wait silently for her to tell me why we're over here.

"I wanted to apologize for how I've treated you," Marlene begins. _She's finally going to apologize?_ I didn't know how much I wanted my friendship with her back, despite all our recent arguments and conflict, until that thought lifted a heaviness off of me. Marlene and I didn't know each other that long, but I really liked her a lot. I still dream sometimes about choosing between Marlene and Hector, and always wake with an ache deep inside, full of regret that I could not save them both, always wondering if it was even the right choice. Is there a right choice, in that kind of situation?

Marlene continues, "I should have listened to you and Uriah when you told me that you were just friends. I never gave you a chance, and I'm sorry for that, because I think maybe I've been missing out by being angry with you instead of accepting your friendship. Can we start over?"

I respond by throwing my arms around her. I'm not much of a hugger, but something about this just called for it. "I understand why you thought what you did. Thanks for giving me another chance."

The door to the training room bursts open and I jump up eagerly- I know who this will be before I even look.

"I thought I heard someone in here," Tobias says, smiling at me across the room.

"Yeah, and of course it was my idiot brother," Zeke teases, his arm wrapped around Shauna's shoulders. "You guys shouldn't be in here after hours. Or Four might have to tell Eric and then you're as good as dead."

And wait for it… Lynn's gonna speak next. I've begun to turn that annoying deja vu feeling I'm always getting these days into a game- seeing how often I can predict exactly what will happen or who will say what. Marlene definitely threw me for a loop just now, but Four and Zeke have been quite predictable.

Uriah sticks the pellet gun back into the waistband of his jeans and we begin to file out. Then there's what I expected Lynn to say, and she doesn't disappoint. "You wouldn't tell Eric... "

Four snorts. "No, I wouldn't." I'm the last one out, and he guides me with his hand at the small of my back. I smile thinking of how last time we were in this situation, he kept me back and I held his hand. This time, he stops me in the hall again and the others are already too far ahead to notice. "Meet me by the tracks tonight," he says softly as we slowly walk in the same direction our friends went; it's an invitation, not a demand. "Ten-thirty?"

I smile, remembering when he had me meet him at the tracks just before stage three. I know it can't be for the same reason, but it doesn't matter- I'll follow him wherever it is he wants to go. I don't ever want to be without him again. Still, it doesn't mean I'm not curious. "Of course! What are we doing?"

"I'm taking you out on a date," he whispers. "But I won't tell you where. It's a surprise."

"Can't wait," I murmur, staring at his lips. I know we can't. Not here, with cameras everywhere, in a hallway that anyone could come down at any moment.

Redirecting my gaze to his brilliant dark blue eyes, I smile at him shyly for a moment before I turn and run to catch up with my friends.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

I'm not sure where Tris disappeared to, but I don't see Four either, so I figure they must be together. I don't envy their position- needing to hide their relationship like they do. Now that I know, I wonder how I was so stupid to begin with. Watching her around him, knowing that she just _can't_ show it in public- her feelings are as plain as the nose on her face.

"Mar!" Tris says breathlessly, as if she had just been sprinting, touching my arm as she catches up to us.

I feel like I have to be extra nice now to make up for how bitchy I've been practically since I first met her. "Hey, Tris!" I say, making an effort to put extra warmth into my voice. "Have fun?" I waggle my eyebrows and her cheeks turn pink. Even after, apparently, months as a Dauntless, she's still got that Stiff modesty. It's really pretty amusing. I can only imagine how much fun our next game of Candor or Dauntless will be. I have no doubt that teasing her with embarrassing questions and sexy dares will become a favorite pastime for Zeke and Uriah very quickly. All in good fun, of course.

Tris rolls her eyes. "Way too many cameras for that. But…" She gets this sheepish, pleading look in her eyes. "He's taking me out on a date tonight," she whispers.

I squeal loud enough that Lynn turns around, raising an eyebrow. "Girl talk," I say with a grin, waving her off. "You're not girly enough to enjoy this." Lynn nods once, turning back to continue whatever conversation she and Uriah are having. Tris laughs.

"So…" Tris drawls. "Could you go shopping with me and help me get ready? Christina always did, the few times I had any reason to care that much how I looked, but she doesn't know…" I know she's kind of asking me by default, but at least this is an opportunity to get to know her better and maybe make up for the way I have been acting. I guess she did know me before and liked me, but I still regret the way I have acted.

"Yes!" I say enthusiastically, clapping my hands. "Tris and I are going shopping, see you guys later!" I call ahead the others. Zeke waves without really looking at us and Shauna grins, probably knowing why we need to shop. Uriah raises his eyebrows, but looks happy, relieved that I am making an effort to get to know his friend. Lynn, as I expected, just shrugs and yells, "later!" She isn't really into the whole shopping and primping thing.

Two hours later, we have settled on a fitted black tank top with lace at the top and bottom, and _finally_ found a skirt that isn't too… well, isn't too _Stiff_ for me, as her current fashion critic, to nix, but long enough that Tris doesn't feel naked in it. I'm quite sure Christina would insist she wear some fancy, impractical shoes, but I agree with Tris- she might fall flat on her face trying to get on or off the train in some stupid shoes like heels, and this ensemble actually looks totally badass with her combat boots. "Yay!" Tris cheers. "Maybe _you_ can be my fashion expert from now on, because you are far more reasonable than Christina."

"You got it," I say with a grin. I've actually had a really good time with Tris today. She is occasionally funny- I'm sure she never told a joke in her life before she got to Dauntless, the Stiffs probably consider jokes attention-seeking and selfish, but she has a natural tendency towards sarcasm that actually had me snickering a few times. Particularly her references to Uriah's over the top love of cake.

I end up taking Tris to my parents' apartment. No one is home, so we aren't slowed down by introductions or anything, and Tris takes a quick shower while I dig out the extra makeup that I didn't bring with me to the dorms two weeks ago. Once she's out, we don't say much until I finish drying her hair; now we can actually hear each other.

"Tell me about you and Four," I say with a smile. "I take it you were together…. Before?"

Nodding, Tris looks down, her mouth curling into a shy smile. "We got together near the end of initiation, last time. We had to hide it at first. I mean, Peter had already tried to kill me once and-"

Woah, woah, woah… I have not heard about that. "He tried to kill you?!"

"Yes," Tris says matter-of-factly. "He, along with Drew and Al, tried to throw me into the Chasm because I ranked first in stage two. Anyway… we kissed after the final rankings were revealed, in front of everyone. But then, that night was when the war started, so pretty much our whole relationship… we were fighting a war, fighting to stay alive, to keep each other alive. It has been nice, even if we have to hide it, having just… more time together."

We are silent for a minute then she takes a deep breath. "Uriah really loves you, you know. He has missed you so much. I felt guilty every day- still do- for saving Hector. I couldn't save you both… I…" I put my hand on her shoulder in comfort. I have wondered why she chose Hector and let me die, but I also can't really be mad. How do you decide which life is more valuable? I don't think there's an easy answer, and this tears her up inside- it's obvious just from the way she's literally biting her cheek to hold back tears. "I saved him for Lynn," she says really softly. "Shauna had just been shot and paralyzed a couple days before… I didn't have enough time to think… every choice was a wrong choice."

"You don't have to explain, Tris," I reassure her. I am glad she did, but she doesn't have to. I did not know about Shauna before and she was only looking out for one of my very best friends- and I don't even think Lynn likes her that much. Tris smiles at me gratefully.

"I _am_ sorry," I say, "for how I have treated you. I didn't give you a fair chance."

"It's okay, I understood why. I'm glad to have you back."

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

When Tris runs off to catch up to her friends, I don't waste a moment in getting things set up for tonight. Enough exploration of the Dauntless compound will lead you to all kinds of hidden gems; remnants of the past- the distant past, before the war even- and I remember just which musty storage closet holds the items I need.

Tonight, I want to take Tris out on a date. Unfortunately, we can't risk anyone seeing us- Tris is enough of a target for Peter as it is, and if he knows we are involved, he's sure to believe that I am helping her through initiation in some way. I'm not, of course. Neither Tris nor I are cheaters. Besides that, she doesn't need my help. Even if she _did_ need it, I know that she would not accept it even if I offered. I'd bet my life that Peter would, though.

I stop at my apartment first. I'll need a backpack to carry this stuff in. I look back and forth between my fridge and the backpack for a moment but ultimately decide that I should wait on the food. While me giving her food poisoning might someday make a funny first date story, I would rather avoid literally making her sick. I will just have to bring the backpack home with me after I set everything up.

The Dauntless compound is huge, and the storage closet I need to visit is at the opposite end; I check my watch when I reach the train tracks. It is just past six o'clock. Good timing; the train will be here in four minutes. It is a hot July day, but far less humid than is typical of Chicago at this time of year, and a nice breeze keeps me comfortable. I lean against the outside wall of the Pire, tipping my head back to rest it on cool glass, and I close my eyes, letting the cool gusts of wind soothe away my stress and worries, enjoying the birdsongs coming from the nearby trees. When I hear the train horn just a few minutes later, I'm almost sorry for my good timing getting to the tracks. This peaceful feeling is almost unfamiliar to me, and I would have liked to enjoy it a little longer. To my surprise, that peaceful feeling follows me onto the train as I hold both handles and lean my body out of the opening.

The peaceful feeling is crowded out by the return of tension and anxiety when I hop out at the factionless sector. I wander the empty streets for a few minutes looking for the building I want to set this up in. Abandoned buildings are prevalent, to say the least, in the Factionless sector.

I keep my eyes open for my mother, hoping to avoid her today. I believed that she was dead for nearly half my life, because Marcus told me she was after she left me. When she contacted me during my first year at Dauntless, the reunion was not a happy one. Our relationship has improved slightly, but I still cannot predict what her reaction might be to my note last week, informing her that I have chosen to stay at Dauntless. I also know that previously, she and Tris did not have the best relationship, and I hope that things will be better this time around, but I'm sure not holding my breath.

"Four?" The sound of my name makes me jump; either he was so quiet coming up behind me that I somehow did not notice him, or I was too lost in my thoughts about Tris. I suppose it could be either, or both.

"Anthony," I greet him with a stoic expression on my face. Anthony works closely with my mother, Evelyn. He is a few years older than I am, with unkempt red hair and a scraggly beard of the same color. I don't know his story, or how he became factionless, but he has always been kind to me and seemed like a decent enough person. However, no matter how nice he may seem, I'm wary of anyone closely affiliated with my mother… especially after everything Uriah and Tris told me.

"Looking for your mom? I can take you to her."

I shake my head. I have to think of an excuse, and fast. "No, I have to make this trip quick. I'm here on Dauntless business. Max sent me out to repair a camera we've been having trouble with. Even working in the control room gets me outside once in awhile," I chuckle, hoping it doesn't sound as fake as it feels.

Anthony smiles, and i can't quite decide if it's genuine. "I see. Well, I hope you'll meet with Evelyn soon; I know she'd like to see you. Good luck with your work." His tone is light; I don't think I have anything to worry about.

Even so, I weave through the blocks, taking a roundabout way to the building in which I plan to set up our date; I don't want to be followed.

A glance at my watch tells me that I had better hurry back to the train; it's already nearing nine o'clock, so I must meet Tris in less than two hours.


	22. Chapter 21

_**A/N: There's an M-rated version of this chapter also, which you can find through my author page. :)**_

 **CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE**

 _ **Tobias**_

"So, where are you taking me?" Tris's eyes are bright and wide, filled with curiosity and excitement.

I sit on the floor of the train car with my back to the wall, pulling her with me. "I already told you that I'm taking you on a date," I tell her, smirking. "And that's all you're getting out of me."

She tries to pout as she cuddles against my side, my arm around her shoulders, but the corner of her lip still twitches. "Not even a hint at what we'll be doing?"

"Nope," I grin, popping the 'p'. Her smile is contagious. I must have taken her on dates before, but she is so enthusiastic, it makes me wonder. "Tell me about our first date. You know… before."

Tris gives me a small smile. "Well… we only ever went on one date," she tells me. Only one? In all those months? "We were too busy fighting a war." I pull her into my lap straddling me as I nod, encouraging her to go on. "When you finally got the chance to take me out on a date, it was after we defeated Erudite, when Evelyn had taken over the city. We had to sneak out- there was a curfew in place, and we also couldn't be seen together because Evelyn hated me, and you had to convince her we were through." A knot forms in my stomach. I get this same nervous feeling, almost like a sense of impending doom, whenever Tris mentions the state of her previous relationship with my mother. As always, I push it aside.

"We went to that big sculpture in Erudite," she continues. "You know, the one with the curved metal plates, the abstract one, in Millennium Park?" I nod- I know the one. It's a strange sculpture, puzzling to look at, but intriguing. "We climbed it with some food and a blanket and fizzy drinks you stole from Erudite- which we both found to be absolutely disgusting- and finally, for once, we just got to be a couple of teenagers in love." Her her voice softens, and I can just barely hear her over the wind through the open train car, although her mouth is just inches from my ear. "We didn't get enough time to do that."

I tuck a stray strand of blond hair behind her ear. "I guess it's a good thing we're making up for it now."

Tris slowly leans closer to me, and when my gaze flicks from her lips up to her eyes, I can see that she is staring at my lips, too. They meet slowly, gently, almost tentatively. But when they meet, passion reignites, and the kiss deepens quickly. I slide her jacket off her shoulders, and Tris lets out a soft moan as I kiss her jaw, then her neck, before moving lower and kissing each of the birds on her collarbone.

I really wish we weren't on a train right now, because I don't want to stop what we're doing. Unfortunately, we have to. "I hate to cut this short," I say, leaning my forehead against hers, "but we need to jump.

Tris gets up, pulling her jacket back on, and looks out the window. "Here? This isn't a date to see your mother is it?" she says with a frown.

"I'm not that bad at this whole dating thing. Give me a little credit." I laugh, shaking my head. "Come on, Tris, let's go. You'll see when you get there," I add in response to her furrowed eyebrows. All that curiosity and need for answers… her Erudite is showing.

We both easily land on our feet. "I love doing that," she breathes. I raise an eyebrow. "Jumping on and off the trains, of course. But I love watching you do it even more."

We walk about four blocks from the train track- a nice short distance. The building is only about ten stories high, and its walls are made of glass and metal, like most of the buildings around here. There are some broken windows higher up, but the room we will be using is closer to the center of the building and entirely windowless. Outside, there are several rectangular indentations in the wall that had glass over them kind of like picture frames. Only one still holds anything- an old, warped poster, half ripped off, the ink colors run together from decades of exposure to the elements, so whatever it once showed is now unrecognizable.

As we approach the door, Tris reads the large neon sign, which I bet would look really cool when lit up, but I didn't want to attract attention so it remains dark today. "Cinema?" she asks. "What's a cinema?"

"It's a place you go to watch a film," I answer, grinning. "Have you ever seen a movie?" She shakes her head side to side, nearly bouncing up to the door in excitement. The glass on it is completely shattered, so all we have to do is step through. "I found a bunch of old film reels in a storage closet at Dauntless. I'd imagine that Erudite has a lot more of them, but there was a pretty good selection. I haven't seen the movie I brought tonight, so hopefully it's good, as it's your first movie experience." Truth be told, I've only seen two movies, myself, in my two years at Dauntless. I never bothered to get a television; Abnegation habits run deep. I've seen a couple with Zeke, though. Both were action movies. From what I've been able to find out, the one I picked is a comedy and a "classic", whatever that means.

* * *

All of seats were ripped out of this theater long ago, so Tris and I sit on a blanket on the floor. Only crumbs are left of our sandwiches, and we have moved on to Dauntless cake. It didn't take me too long to figure out how to set up the film in the projector, and Tris waited patiently until I was done. The movie is called The Princess Bride. The story, basically, starts out with a little boy sick in bed, and his grandfather comes to read him a book. The main plot is from the book itself.

As we are the only people here, we're free to talk through the movie as much as we like. Tris is wide-eyed at the screen the whole time. Near the beginning she glanced at me nervously when the farm boy the girl was in love with, Wesley, died, and I know she was thinking of her own choice to leave me at the Bureau. Thankfully, the story moves on quickly. We compare the fighting in the movie to Dauntless initiation, and we muse about whether sword fighting is a useful skill, eventually concluding that no, it probably would not be very practical in our world. It's definitely fun to watch, though.

"Now, it is down to you, and it is down to me." Vizzini and the Dread Pirate Roberts are beginning a 'battle of wits'.

"I hate that creep," Tris whispers. "He's like an Erudite. What a know-it all. So sure of himself." Vizzini goes on and on about his 'logic' being no match for the pirate's… until he falls down dead from the poison, and Roberts reveals his strategy of having slowly developed an immunity to the deadly powder. "I thought he seemed like a Dauntless, but he's Erudite smart, isn't he?"

"Guess he must be Divergent," I snort.

As the Pirate reveals his true identity, while rolling down a huge hill screaming 'as you wish'- which has always been Wesley's code for 'I love you'- Tris scoots closer to me, setting her plate, just a few cake crumbs remaining on it, to the side. My arm wraps around her waist, and my fingers find a strip of bare skin where her shirt has ridden up. I rub circles on her side with my thumb.

Tris continues to make comments about the movie here and there, and while it has been a fun movie so far, I'm not watching it anymore. "Why are you staring at me?" she whispers nervously.

I say the first thing that comes to my mind- the most honest answer I can give her. "You're too beautiful to look away from."

I lean in and press my lips to hers. The kiss starts out sweet but soon deepens, and I find myself tangling my hands in her hair as her fingers trace my spine. I have an indescribably strong need to close the distance between us; it feels like no matter how close we are, it will never be close enough. Judging by the way Tris pulls me against her, she's feeling that same need. One of my hands slides slowly down her back as the other tugs at her hair, making her tilt her head back, exposing her neck. Just as on the train, my lips kiss and suck at her jaw, her neck… then as I move down to the birds on her collarbone, I let go of her hair and squeeze her hips with both hands.

I need to be closer to her, though there is no air between us, just some thin layers of fabric. My heart flutters as she kisses that sensitive spot behind my ear, pushing her body even closer to mine, which I didn't even think was possible. She pulls back and we look directly into each other's eyes as my hands slowly run up her sides, raising the hem of her shirt as they ascend. I'm searching her eyes for her permission; something in them urges me to keep going. So I do.

I swear my heart is going to beat right out of my chest with just the knowledge that I'm pulling her shirt up, maybe even going to take it off of her altogether, though I haven't looked down at her yet. She nods, and I pull it off and toss it aside, my eyes still fixed on hers. When I'm finally about to look down and admire her, she lets go of me and crosses her arms over her chest.

I frown. "You're beautiful, Tris. I don't want you to hide from me," I sigh. "It's just me here."

I remove one hand from her side and run it along her lower lip, forcing it free from where it is trapped between her teeth. Tris looks down shyly, trapping her lip under her teeth yet again, and slowly lowers her arms.

My hand that still rests on her body slowly slides to her stomach, just below her breasts, and I look at her again for permission. Slowly we lean back on the blanket, me hovering over her, as our lips collide once again. Our tongues fight for dominance. She is lying beneath me, our legs tangled together, and I support my upper body on one elbow as I reach behind her and, after fumbling for a moment, unhook her bra; this time she throws the garment aside. My breath hitches and my heart pounds, and my pants feel tight, as I gently slide one hand over her chest, staring at her bare torso in wonder. "Beautiful," I murmur, and she closes her eyes and smiles contentedly.

My breath hitches and I pause for just a moment mid-kiss as Tris's hands explore more of me. As her hand slips lower, I swear my heart is going to pound right of my chest. Still, I force myself to pull back from the kiss.

My forehead rests against hers, my eyes closed. "Tris… I thought… you said you didn't want…" I pant, and I think that is as close as I will come right now to forming a full sentence.

Tris kisses me softly. "I don't. Not yet. But we can do other things…" I let a shaky breath in and out. I'm so nervous… she may have only been with me… but it was in this alternate universe or whatever so I wasn't there. I'm inexperienced. She takes advantage of my open mouth and fits her lips to mine, darting her tongue in, exploring my mouth and I respond readily. My fingers grip her thigh as we kiss more and more passionately.

We don't notice the movie at all any more as our hands roam new territory, and I feel things I never knew possible, the most amazing feelings I've ever experienced. She is so beautiful… so sexy… so perfect, I could swear she was made just for me.

We collapse on the blanket. The movie credits roll, playing a horribly cheesy song, as our breaths begin to slow and quiet. Suddenly Tris shoots upright in alarm, whipping her head side to side, eyes wide and searching. "Did you hear that?" she whispers. "I- I thought I heard something… someone…" She shakes her head as if to clear it.

I shake my head. "It was probably just the film," I suggest. Tris nods her head uneasily, but settles back onto the blanket, using my arm as a pillow. I look into her eyes and stroke her hair, and I know, in this moment, without a shadow of a doubt that I am falling hard for her. She's the only one for me. I can't tell her yet- I don't want her to question my sincerity, to think that I am just saying that or just think that because of what we just did, but I know it's true.

Tris runs her nails gently up and down my stomach, where my t-shirt has ridden up, and I close my eyes in contentment. "We should probably clean all this up and head back," she says with a hint of disappointment in her voice.

I nod. Going back to Dauntless makes me feel anxious; Peter has attacked her before, and now she's first ranked. I really don't trust him not to try it again, and he probably wouldn't be alone this time. Each initiate's fastest time was posted next to their name today with the stage two rankings. Tris's was just two minutes and eight seconds; Peter, as third rank, came in at eight minutes, thirty-two seconds. She has already told me that the first time around, tonight is when they attacked her by the Chasm. There is no way he won't target her.

"Stay with me tonight," I murmur. "I need to know that you're safe." Tris smiles and nods as she sits up and begins to pack up the food packages and such, and I head up to the projection room to pack away the film reel, with butterflies in my stomach, thinking about how amazing it will feel to sleep with Tris in my arms.


	23. Chapter 22

**CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO**

 _ **Tris**_

This day, the first time around, I woke up in Tobias's apartment, just as I do today. But this time is different.

This time, I'm not black and blue. This time, Tobias and I have already shared our deepest secrets. This time, I am wrapped in Tobias's arms, his bare chest pressed against my t-shirt covered back, our legs tangled together.

The clock turns from 6:29 to 6:30, and the alarm blares. Tobias's breathing changes abruptly from its slow-and-steady cadence as I reach out and slam my open hand down on the alarm, evidently hitting the right button somewhere in there, because the noise stops.

Tobias doesn't let go of me as I roll in his arms to face him, untangling our legs only to tangle them again from a different position. "Morning." His voice is thick and hoarse with sleep, and his eyes only half open, but his face is content, his lips forming a small smile. His arms tighten around my back, holding onto me like I will float away if he lets go.

"Morning." I nuzzle my head into the crook of his neck, letting out a contented sigh. "You can't imagine how much I've missed this."

"I could certainly get used to it," he responds before resting his lips against my forehead.

We are nearing the end of initiation. Today should be the day Tobias will explain the fear landscape to us. We only have a few days left before the fear landscapes, then the attack will occur early the following morning.

We don't have a plan, and we haven't warned the Abnegation.

"Tobias," I say into his neck. "I want us to visit my parents tonight."

* * *

It has only been a little more than two weeks since I saw my father, and a week or so since I last saw my mother, but it feels like a lifetime. In the past few months, I've only had moments with them… moments before I came back, moments the day of the Aptitude Test and Choosing Ceremony, moments on Visiting Day with my mother. So much has happened to me since I last _really_ spent time with them, and I have learned so much. I am a different person, and they are different people through my eyes.

It wasn't until I was at the Bureau, hearing about how they met and reading my mother's journals, that I realized just how little I knew them. It was as though they went from just being parents… to being people- people I did not think I would ever have the opportunity to truly know. Maybe now, that can change. But only if _we_ make it change.

Tobias squeezes my hand as we walk through the dark streets of monotonous, uniform gray concrete houses. Uriah walks on my other side, patting my shoulder or rubbing my back gently here and there, giving me occasional understanding, encouraging smiles. They both know that I am nervous about this meeting.

We pause where the short pathway to the door meets the cracked concrete sidewalk. I close my eyes for a moment and take a deep breath, reminding myself that I told my mother I would come when I could. She won't be surprised to see me. She doesn't care about the factions, I tell myself. I'm her daughter, and she loves me. She will be happy to see me.

I open my eyes and stare for just a moment at the gray front door that I walked through every day for sixteen years, before turning my head to meet Tobias' reassuring gaze. I nod to him, and together the three of us approach the front door. I knock slowly, three times, and wait.

Soon, too soon, before I am really ready, the door swings open.

"B- _Tris,"_ my mother says with a fond smile, gently pressing a warm hand to the cool skin of my cheek before stepping back and ushering her in with a small sweeping wave of her hand. "Come in, all of you, please."

"Hello, Mrs. Prior," Uriah says politely.

Mom taps her chin for a moment as though she is thinking, and her eyes light up as she remembers how she knows him. "Uriah Pedrad," she says warmly. "I believe I've told you before to call me Natalie." She turns to Tobias. "Nice to see you again as well, Four." Tobias smiles back at her nervously.

The house is just as I remember it- tidy, as sparsely furnished and decorated as Tobias's apartment, the slight scent of lemon in the air from the cleaners my mother uses. I breathe it in and a feeling of comfort washes over me, settling my nerves for a moment.

My father stands near the fireplace, in front of the worn, overstuffed gray chair he spends each evening in. Patches are threadbare, and stuffing shows in one corner. I used to rub my thumb back and forth on that spot, and I have to resist the impulse to graze my fingers once again over the familiar texture. I introduce Uriah as my father studies him critically, surely thinking something about Dauntless hooligans, then Tobias. I can tell he recognizes Tobias on some level, but can't quite place him. Finally, he looks me over, and I can see the disappointment and disapproval in his eyes as he takes in my tight black tank top, ripped black jeans, and the tattoo on my collarbone. "Beatrice," he says evenly.

He is still upset with me. But I know in my heart, without a shadow of a doubt, that deep inside that anger is just hurt- hurt that Caleb and I left him and Mom, left them with too much quiet and two empty seats at the dinner table- and really, he still loves me more than words could ever adequately describe. Enough that he would die for me. I know he would, because I watched him do it, the same night I watched my mother die for the same reason. I need to make sure they don't once again end up in a position to make that choice.

"Hi, Dad. I've missed you," I whisper. After a moment of awkward staring, I introduce my companions. "This is Uriah Pedrad. He is one of my best friends, and a Dauntless-born initiate." Tobias and I lock eyes for a moment before I continue. We talked about what we were going to tell them before we left Dauntless, but I'm still unsure how quickly I should reveal anything, everything. "This is Four," I say simply. Tobias nods to my father, trying to make him feel more comfortable. The Abnegation don't shake hands, and honestly, I know Tobias is more comfortable without the physical contact, anyway.

I feel deep blue eyes burning into me. I guess we start with this, then. "Uh… Mom knows that Four is my instructor. I should probably tell you both that we're also… seeing each other." I force myself to meet my father's gaze and he… is… furious.

"How old are you?" he spits at Tobias.

"Eighteen, sir. I- I care very much for your daughter, and I promise to do everything I can to protect her." That was odd. It's not like Tobias to stutter or hesitate like that.

Dad turns to me. "You're too young, Beatrice. I-"

I gather my courage. I'm an adult now. If I am adult enough to choose who I will be for the rest of my life, adult enough to fight in a war, then I am certainly adult enough to make my own decisions about whether I am old enough to date a boy just two years older than me. "I prefer Tris now, Dad," I say calmly, "and I don't think I'm too young at all. You and Mom were only fifteen when you fell in love, weren't you? And in different factions, unlike T- _Four_ and me." Dad just stares at me with his jaw dropped. My parents never told me how they met, or when. I learned all of that from Zoey, at the Bureau. "You struggled in psychology class, but Mom was good at it, so you would meet at Buckingham Fountain for her to tutor you. Do I have everything correct?" He slowly nods. "Good. Now, I suppose, we have established that I know things. How I know is not important. But the things we need to discuss tonight _are._ I'm sure Four will tell you more about himself when he is made comfortable enough here." Tobias and I discussed earlier what my parents need to know… and what he needs to reveal about himself to have that conversation.

Uriah shifts uncomfortably next to me and Tobias squeezes my hand, his eyes shining with pride at seeing me stand up for myself this way, in a situation where it would be so easy for all my selfless, polite Abnegation upbringing to drown out the Dauntless girl that has risen to the surface over the past few months. I sit down on the couch, Uriah and Tobias following my lead, and after a moment my parents follow suit by sitting in their armchairs.

My mother clears her throat. "When I saw you on Visiting Day, you told me that the Abnegation were in danger. I take it that's why you're here tonight." Uriah and I both nod. I don't know how to begin, and open and close my mouth a few times looking for the words.

As he has many times before, Uriah swoops in to rescue me. "Erudite is planning to overthrow Abnegation, and they're using Dauntless to do it. Our entire faction will be put under a mind control simulation. They won't know what they are doing until they wake up from the sim and realize that they have murdered innocent people." My father sucks in a sharp breath, and I swallow hard as Uriah and I share a look, my eyes silently thanking him.

"We are probably the only people who are not involved in this plan that know about it," I continue for him. "I can't tell you how we know. I just need you to trust me. We need you to help us stop stop our friends, our faction, from being stripped of their own free will and forced to commit genocide. I need you to help me save your lives."

My parents silently nod in agreement, and Uriah and I explain what will happen- how the mind control simulation will be administered and how it works, where it will be controlled from, who we know is involved. Tobias adds in the actual evidence he has found by mirroring Max's computer, and he relays back what he has heard through the control room monitors when Max and Eric have met with Jeanine, as well as detailing the evidence he has managed to gather.

When we finally all fall silent for a moment, my father asks, "What do you know about the… well, _why_ Jeanine is doing this? I believe I already know, but please, I would like your confirmation."

"Divergents," I say, "and power." He nods and waits for me to elaborate. "She believes that divergents are dangerous and a threat to our society. Jeanine doesn't understand people like us, and is afraid of what she does not understand. She wants to wipe out Abnegation because of the high divergent population, and she wants to have power over the factions. She also wants that file that Abnegation is hiding. I know that Marcus wants to release it, and she will do anything to keep that from happening." When I mention the file, my parents give each other a grave look.

"You said 'people like us'," Dad observes.

"Yes," Uriah answers. "Tris, Four, me… Natalie, you are too, correct? I know that Caleb is not, so my assumption is that you, Mr. Prior, are not divergent." My father nods in agreement. "Because the three of us are divergent, the mind control serum won't work on us. We aren't sure who else might be immune to it, so we're pretty much on our own. There's no way to avoid the injection without making the leaders suspicious. We also know that if Jeanine finds out that any of us are divergent, we've got a one way ticket to Erudite to spend the little bit of life we would have left as her lab rats." Mom cringes.

"We need to get Caleb out of Erudite," Mom says with an edge of… something, in her voice. Not exactly panic… but not too far off from it.

Uriah and I shake our heads sternly. "He's on her side," I say.

At first I think that the anger that settles into the wrinkles of my father's face is at Caleb, but I am soon proved wrong. "Beatrice!" he hisses. "How can you turn your back on your brother this way? Caleb would never-"

"He is, though," Uriah interrupts. "Look… my girlfriend and I were just in Erudite a week ago- we were playing a prank. Caleb doesn't know me, but I know him- don't ask, I know I sound creepy, but I swear I'm not." I stifle a laugh. "Anyway, I heard his voice. His- and Jeanine's- and hid in a place that I could eavesdrop. I know it was him. Not only do I know his voice, but Jeanine actually said his name, and referred to his family and former neighbors in Abnegation. I'm pretty sure there are no other Calebs that transferred from Abnegation to Erudite."

A knot forms in the pit of my stomach as I see my father's face deflate. I hate hurting them this way- absolutely hate it. It would probably be easier to hear that their son was dead, than that he was a traitor- that he was participating in a plot to kill his own family. I stare down at my shoes as Uriah continues.

"She told him that the attack would happen early morning, the day after initiation, and she gave him his assignment. She said he was to go to Abnegation and make you two, and his old neighbors, think that he's on your side. He's supposed to spy, and he is supposed to stay with any refugees that escape the soldiers. And I know what you're thinking- I would be too. You're thinking that he's just playing along, that he's going to double-cross Jeanine. But Natalie… Mr. Prior…" he meets each of their eyes, and I know they can read the absolute sincerity in his eyes, and that they can see how sorry he is to have to say this. "He agreed to have a tracking device placed in his upper arm so that he can lead them right to you." Uriah takes a deep breath as I watch tears form in my father's eyes. My mother sits silently and stoically, her back so straight that it's like someone attached a yardstick to her spine. "And then… and then he talked about how much he believes in Faction Before Blood… and he said that if Abnegation is harboring divergents, genocide is the only option."

Mom shakes her head and looks away.

We have two more big things to cover. I look to Tobias, and his face contorts with apprehension. I squeeze his hand. "You can do this," I whisper.

"Uh… to tell you the next part, I need to begin by telling you about myself," he says quietly. Mom and Dad both look at him intently; I know they both feel like they know him from somewhere… and that's because they do. "I transferred to Dauntless two years ago. When I was nine years old, I was told that my mother had died, leaving me alone with my father." He spits the word 'father' with such venom and disgust, as though it is poison he is ridding his body of. He stares at his hands as he continues, and shame is written all over his face. My heart aches for him. "For the next seven years, until my Choosing Day, he beat me with his belt for any and every small infraction he could, and he often locked me in the little coat closet at the top of the stairs for days." Tobias swallows hard, and I watch his Adam's apple bob as he looks up to meet my parents' eyes. "My name is Tobias Eaton, and the articles Erudite has released about Marcus are true."

My parents' eyes are wide, their jaws slack, and my father is white as a ghost. As they process the shock of Tobias's confession, I wrap my arms around him, feeling him tremble slightly. I don't care that my parents are sitting right here, I don't care about the lifetime of warnings about the power of physical touch- Tobias has never confessed this in words before, and he needs me, he needs comfort. "You did it," I whisper, nesting my chin in the hollow where his neck meets his shoulder. "And it's okay. They won't judge you, I promise. I love you."

Tobias wraps his arms around me and holds on tight, then kisses my jaw lightly before pulling away. We stare into one another's eyes, his overflowing with emotion.

Then he breaks the gaze and clears his throat. "There's more," he says, and he doesn't look down at his hands, or the floor. He has this new confidence that he didn't a few minutes ago, and his voice is strong and steady. "Evelyn isn't really dead. She is alive, and she is the leader of the factionless. The reason you need to know this… is that she intends to overthrow the faction system entirely. If she succeeds, she will act as a dictator. No one will be safe. She is manipulative, power hungry, and absolutely not to be trusted. So, we're looking at threats from all sides, here."

"Additionally," I speak up, "there is the added threat of the Bureau." The shock on my parents' faces is overwhelming. I sigh. "Yes, I know about the Bureau, and I know about David. Again… it doesn't matter how I know, so don't ask, because I will not explain it." The last thing I need is for them to think I'm crazy. Four and Marlene know, and that's almost too many people already. "First of all… he's in on Jeanine's plan. The simulation serum they're going to use came from the Bureau itself. On top of all that… if our faction system is threatened, if Evelyn takes it down and we can't get it back together quickly, David will release the memory serum, in a form that is transmitted from person to person like a virus, and completely reset the Chicago Experiment. We won't even know each other. No one will. Our entire lives, every memory we have… gone, just like that." I snap my fingers for dramatic effect.

"So," my mother says, "we need to stop Jeanine and Dauntless, stop Evelyn, _and_ make sure that David does not destroy the lives of every person in the city." I nod. My father puts his head in his hands.

It's all out there. Everything. Well, everything that Uriah and I are willing to say. His warm brown eyes lock with my own pale gray-blue ones as all the words, all the exposed secrets, settle like a blanket over every part of the living room that I once sat in every night, telling my parents about my day while being careful not to say too much about myself- that would be selfish- while knitting blankets and hats to give to the factionless. I look away from Uriah and stare at my mother's knitting basket, the needles sticking out of an uncompleted project, and the comfort that simple image brings me gives me the strength to cut through the heavy silence.

"So, does anyone have a plan?"


	24. Chapter 23

**_A/N: This is one of those chapters that has an M-rated version, so again, you can find that through my page. :) Be warned, the T-rated version here does have implied sexual situations, so consider yourself warned!_**

* * *

 **CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE**

 _ **Tris**_

It's late when we get back to Dauntless- just after midnight. I know I have training tomorrow, but it's just practicing in one of Lauren's fear simulations, and I'm too wired to go to sleep. My mind buzzes as I go over and over our plans in my head.

In the end, we decided that our best bet was to allow the simulation to start, with Tobias and me staying back at Dauntless, hiding out, until the trains leave. Then we will need to sneak up to the control room- without getting ourselves killed, hopefully- and shut down the simulation. Uriah will go along to Abnegation to organize the loyal Dauntless as quickly as possible and hopefully arrest the traitors, with Jeanine, Max and Eric being the obvious priorities.

My parents are to steal and hide the file someplace very safe, so that neither can Marcus relase it, nor will Jeanine be able to find it, and tomorrow my father will do everything he can to convince the council to cancel the release of the file and hope that if he is successful, Jeanine will back off.

As for Evelyn… we aren't entirely sure what to do about her. All we know is that we will begin by sending Tobias to talk to her, to see if he can make her see reason.

If at all possible, we will avoid going to the Bureau. We don't believe that we have said anything that will catch anyone's attention within earshot of cameras- we've tried to be pretty careful of that. However, if everything falls apart the way it did last time, we will have no choice. My mother offered to contact him, to appeal to his humanity, but I know it will do no good. To David and the others at the Bureau, the majority of Chicago- the 'genetically damaged'- aren't people. We are just some twisted, misguided science experiment and to admit that this was all for nothing would be to question his entire life's work. David is far too prideful for that.

After shifting uncomfortably around my lumpy dormitory cot for a few minutes, I give up and slip on my sneakers. I need to relieve some tension, and I know just where to go to do that.

The training room is dark and empty. I flip on the lights and pull some tape out of the cupboard, quickly wrapping my hands before crossing to the punching bags. As I punch and kick, over and over, tension slowly melts away. Fatigue is beginning to set in, but my mind isn't quite calm yet. I keep going until a voice sends a shiver up my spine and makes the hair on the back of my neck stand on end.

"You're not supposed to be in here, Stiff. It's past curfew."

I have barely seen Eric since stage one ended, and each time since that day that he hung Christina over the Chasm, his eyes have followed me with this creepy sort of… interest. Tonight, something is different. His eyes are cold and his glare is so icy, I take a step back. The last time he looked at me with this sort of malice was when I listed off his crimes in the interrogation room at Candor, minutes before Tobias shot him in the skull.

Goosebumps prickle my skin and my stomach clenches with fear, but I set my jaw and hold my head high. I will not let him make me weak. I won't give him that satisfaction. "Eric," I say evenly. "I was just about done, anyway. I'll go." I know he won't let me away that easily, but I pull on my jacket and begin to stride to the door anyway.

I will have to pass right by him in order to leave; he stands a yard from the door glaring at me, not blinking, his arms crossed over his chest. He is as still as a statue, not moving a muscle. I keep my eyes on the door. I think I might actually get out of here without any further interaction with him, until I am just steps from the door and I reach out toward the handle- but that is the moment that his hand darts out and grabs my forearm, yanking me toward him.

"Where are you going now, Stiff?" he breathes. "Going to see your boyfriend? Or has he left you already, like in your sim?"

My eyes widen- they must be as round as saucers. My heart beats so heavily in my chest, the rushing of my own blood in my veins is all I can hear. _Tobias deleted that sim. I know he did. He told me so. He would never have left that kind of evidence of our relationship, would never be so careless._

Eric laughs humorlessly. "What, you thought I wouldn't find out?" He pulls me closer, and I can feel his breath on my face. "You had better watch yourself, Stiff, and you'd better tell your little boyfriend Four- or maybe I should say _Tobias-_ to watch himself, too. I don't like to be made a fool of."

I rip my arm away from his grasp. Bright red streaks shaped just like Eric's fingers mark the creamy white skin of my arm, and it looks as though it may already be bruising. "I didn't lead you on, Eric. If you feel like a fool, that was through no fault of mine or of Four's," I hiss.

Eric scoffs. "Second best again," he mutters under his breath. Then he turns away and speaks up again. "Get out of my sight," he growls, and stalks toward the punching bags as I push the door open and run.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

I am exhausted, but can't seem to fall asleep. Telling the Priors about Marcus tonight was terrifying… and freeing, at the same time. They looked shocked, angry, and only a hint of that kicked puppy look I don't want aimed at me. I wonder how Tris reacted when I took her through my fear landscape the first time. If we so quickly became as close as it seems we did, my best guess is that she reacted very similarly to how she did this time, though I can't be sure.

I have just started to drift off while thinking about what I can say to Evelyn tomorrow night when I'm startled awake by a loud knock at my door. It's nearly two in the morning- something has to be wrong. I quickly pull a shirt over my head and flip a light switch on my way to the door. It takes my eyes a moment to adjust to the light, and by the time they do, the door has been kicked shut and Tris is standing in front of me, her eyes wild.

Last time she showed up in the middle of the night she had been attacked. Remembering this I frantically search her for injuries, beginning with her head and working my way down to her shoulders as I ask, "Tris? What happened? Did someone hurt you?"

"No," she says breathlessly, just as my eyes land on large, finger-shaped bruises on her right arm. They're fresh, but already turning purple.

"No?" I challenge. "Then what's this? Who did this, Tris?" My chest is tight at just the thought of someone laying their hands on Tris, despite the fact that I oversaw her training and have watched her being punched and kicked plenty of times. This is different. This isn't about practice. Someone did this because they _wanted_ to hurt her.

I search her eyes as she catches her breath. "Eric," she whispers, her eyes watering. "He- I-" I pull her onto the bed while she stutters, but then she pulls away from me and jumps off the bed. I look at her in bewilderment. What on earth is she upset with me about?!

"You lied to me!" she exclaims, and I have absolutely no idea what she is talking about. I don't have to wait long to find out. "You said you deleted that simulation! The one- the one that- oh my God, how could you, Tobias?!"

The.. the sex one? The one we had the fight about? That's the only one she could possibly be referring to. "Are you kidding me, Tris? Of course I deleted it! Do you really think I want _anyone_ reviewing that? That was… yeah, that is not something I want anyone else to see, ever. I made damn sure that sim was deleted! What is this all about?!"

She said Eric… then she yelled at me about the sim. I know that this means he somehow saw it, but I don't want to admit it to myself. I _swear_ I deleted that. I _swear._ I triple checked! How could he have seen it?! "Tris," I plead, "just tell me what happened. I promise you, I deleted it, just like I said I did."

"Then how did he know?" Tris's eyes water and she allows me this time to pull her into my lap. "I was in the training room- I couldn't sleep. Eric showed up to yell at me and he just looked so different than the other times- so much colder, his eyes, like he _hated_ me. Not that I've never seen that look from him, but he certainly hasn't looked at me that way in the past few weeks. I tried to leave and he grabbed my arm." She rubs the marks on her forearm, and I gently pull it up and press my lips to the bruising. "He asked where I was going, whether I was going to see my _boyfriend…_ or whether you left me already just like in my sim." She swallows. "He said that you and I had both better watch out."

My mind races. I _know_ I deleted that sim. How did he see that? And if he saw that… did he see anything else he shouldn't have? Part of the reason I train initiates is to help protect divergents- it's why I run all the sims instead of sharing the responsibility with Lauren. Tris and Uriah are the only two divergents this year. Tris has almost flawlessly hidden her divergence, though I know it's strong. He shouldn't be able to detect it. Uriah hasn't done as well as Tris in that regard. Nothing glaring enough that I felt it necessary to delete the recordings, outside of the first sim- which was a subject matter issue, not him manipulating the simulation- but I was counting on there not being any reason for Eric to have a close eye on him. Besides that… without believing the impossible- that Uriah's simulation is actually a memory- it could appear as though his fear is about his divergence putting people he cares for in danger. If Eric saw that sim, it would be much worse for Uriah than what could happen to Tris and me because of Tris's simulation.

Honestly, I'm worried- alarmed, really. I take a deep breath to calm myself. Tris clearly understands just how dangerous Eric is, and panicking won't help the situation. If I can calm myself, that will help calm her. "I don't like the sound of this any more than you do, Tris. But we just have to make it through a few more days, right? We'll warn Uri in the morning, and we just… watch our backs. We have three days left of initiation, then the shit is gonna hit the fan either way, and we put our plan in place and hope it works, right?" Tris bites her lip and nods. "Even when we didn't know what was going to happen, we got through it before, right? We still stopped the sim. And even when you ended up in Erudite… we got you out. I think it sounds like the two of us were pretty unstoppable before, and we will be again."

She closes her eyes and tightens her grip on me. "Okay. Yeah, okay. Just… just a few more days. We'll be okay. We'll be okay." She repeats it like a mantra, like she's trying to convince herself, and I just listen to her for a moment because I need to hear it, too. I'm not worried about me, but I couldn't stand it if something happened to Tris.

That thought overwhelms me- it fills my entire body with this strange warmth. And I know, I have to tell her. Right now.

"Tris," I whisper. She pulls back and looks right into my eyes, and I look back into hers… those piercing light blue-gray eyes that look right into my soul. She has to know, already, she has to have seen it in my eyes. But I need her to hear it, too. "Tris, I love you." It's like an exhale, like the emotion just pours right out of me to fill her.

Tears well in Tris's eyes. "I love you, Tobias. More than anything," she breathes before crashing her lips to mine, both hands cupping my cheeks. Our kiss starts out hungry and passionate, but quickly turns tender and sweet.

I smile into the kiss and feel Tris smile back. When our lips connect again, I find myself pulling her closer, with one hand on the back of her neck and the other pressing against the small of her back. She shifts to straddle me, pushing her tongue inside my mouth, and our tongues mate in a passionate dance. I flip us over, Tris hugging my hips with her legs, her fingers desperately pulling at the hem of my shirt, and I lean back a bit so she can pull it over my head before she lifts her arms as I do the same to hers. I want her more than I have ever wanted anything in my life, I need to be closer, impossibly closer, to this beautiful woman. I need her like I need air to breathe, and every fiber of my being is aching to show her how much I love her. But it doesn't have to be tonight, I would wait a million years for her.

"I love you, Tris," I whisper again and her hands slide down my sides, caressing my body gently, running her fingers along the elastic waistband of my shorts.

"Good," she says against my lips, "because you're it for me, Tobias."

I mold my mouth hungrily against hers again before I kiss her jawline, slowly trailing open mouthed kisses down her neck, and then press my lips to each of the ravens on her collarbone before moving slowly down. "Tobias," she moans, "Tobias, I love you so much."

"I love you, Tris," I whisper again as I come back up to taste her sweet lips again.

I pull away and stare into her eyes. "Show me," she whispers, biting her lip.

"Tris…" I say, looking away as I try to find the words I need. "I am telling you I love you because I do. Not because I want us to immediately make love. I don't care how long we wait."

I look deep into her eyes and they are so full of love, longing, and desire. "I want you, Tobias," she says, her voice strong and sure. She lifts her head and fits her lips to mine once more, like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, I am hers and she is mine, we are two parts to one whole. I lean down peck her forehead, then her nose, and finally sweetly kiss her perfect, soft lips, savoring the sweet taste of her mouth.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

My heart races as Tobias leans over me again. It has been so hard to wait… I've already had that first taste when we were together at the Bureau and every time we have kissed, the longing- no, _need-_ has grown stronger. What started as a small flame has become a blazing inferno.

Our next kiss leaves me breathless, then he sits back on his heels again. I smile at him, looking up at him through my eyelashes. "God, you're beautiful," Tobias softly croons, and I can't wait any more. Thankfully, he's beginning to shift on the bed, and as soon as he's close enough I pull him to me.

His love and desire for me, and mine for him, is tangible as we two become one. We focus on each other, it is just him and me as the rest of the world melts away. I can't speak, I can't think, I can't even remember how to breathe. There is just him, and me, and this beautiful moment.

Tobias pulls me close and wraps his arms around me, my head resting on his sculpted shoulder. "Wow," he says when he can finally speak.

I smile. "Yeah… wow."

Tobias leans in and kisses me deeply. "I love you," he says softly, stroking my cheek with his thumb and resting his forehead against mine.

"I love you, too, Tobias," I whisper back.

We only had that one night together before I died setting off the memory serum, and now we have tonight. I can only hope and pray that nothing happens to make history to repeat itself. We need more- we deserve more. But if everything goes wrong, now nothing remains unsaid. We have tonight and we have love.


	25. Chapter 24

**CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR**

 _ **Uriah**_

Today we went through Lauren's fears, and we were done before lunch, so we have the rest of the day off. This was the last day of actual training- we get the next two days off to think about strategies for our fears or whatever, then three days from now, we will go through our fear landscapes. And then, of course, it will be time to stop a war.

Even as distracted as I am with Marlene, now that we are finally together, it did not escape me that Tris looked exhausted. I can't read her mood- she's this weird mix of anxious and happy.

I sit down with my lunch- including Dauntless cake, of course- and begin to eat my hamburger left-handed, as Marlene has become a permanent extension of my opposite arm. We're practically like conjoined twins these days- joined at the hand.

Tris drops into the seat next to me, dropping her tray on the table. Her water threatens to fall over, and I drop my hamburger and grab it, setting it gently and securely on the table. Tris shoots me an apologetic smile that makes me chuckle as I reassemble my burger, which had come apart when I dropped it so suddenly.

Tris leans toward me. "I need to talk to you after lunch," she says in a low voice that only I am near enough to hear. "It's really important. Okay?"

I nod. "That alcove by the chasm?" Tris nods back in confirmation.

Half an hour later, I have somehow managed to separate my hand from Marlene's. I slip into the alcove; Tris is already there waiting, and does not waste any time getting to the point, today.

"I need you to watch out, Uriah." Her face is deadly serious, and even in the dark I can see the fear in her eyes. "Four deleted my second sim- it… it was uh… personal." My eyes are adjusting to the dark and I can see the deep red blush spreading across her cheeks. I can guess what _that_ sim might have been about… "God, it's so humiliating, ugh. It- it didn't reveal anything that put me in danger, really- I mean, Eric has no reason to suspect that I'm divergent- but given that Four and I shouldn't be together, it was something that Eric really should not have seen."

I haven't heard anything that has to do with me, and I'm confused. "I'm sorry he saw… whatever he saw." I hold back a smirk. In some ways, she's still a Stiff at heart. She probably always will be. "Why am I watching out, though?"

"Because how did he see it, Uri?" Tris whisper-yells, annoyed, apparently, at having to spell it out. "Four deleted it right after I left the room. He checked, multiple times. But somehow Eric still saw it. What if he saw yours, too?"

 _Oh. Oh… shit._ She must see the panic in eyes, because she rushes to calm me down. "It's only three days, Uri. You just have to avoid him for _three days_ and then we can stop… all this. We can make sure we're all safe. Right?" I nod slowly. If Eric does have it in for me, three days is a long time to stay out of his way. I mean, all he has to do is show up to the dormitory when I'm sleeping and it's all over. I'm dead at the bottom of the chasm, or worse. "Just be careful," she whispers, then hugs me before slipping out of the alcove.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

The wind is cold on my face and presses my t-shirt tight against my chest as I lean out of the train car, feet together, hands gripping the handles on either side. Tris wanted to come with me to see my mother, Evelyn, tonight, but I talked her into staying back with her friends- both to keep them from realizing she's sneaking around with me, and because I don't want Evelyn to know about Tris.

At first Tris was upset, thinking that I was hiding things from her or embarrassed of her. That- especially the latter- could not be further from the truth. I honestly can hardly wait for the world to know that Tris is mine. However, given what Tris and Uriah have told me about her relationship with my mother the last time, I don't even want Evelyn to know she exists. There are enough threats to Tris's safety already without her being on Evelyn's radar, too.

Today the initiates each went through one of Lauren's fears. We don't use mine because I only have four, and some of them I would never let another person see- except Tris, of course. Tris told me this morning about what happened when she went through Lauren's fear of 'kidnapping by men without faces' last time, so I was really nervous and I would have found a way to get her a different fear if she had not insisted that she could do it. I guess a version of it was in her final fear landscape last time, but it isn't one that I have seen in her simulations. After she breezed right through it today, I wonder if it will be there at all this time.

When the train passes through the factionless sector, I jump out at the stop nearest the building I expect Evelyn to be in. Faint light shines through the boards that cover the broken windows of the old warehouse. I bang my fist against the door four times, then twice, and moments later it swings open revealing Anthony. He raises his eyebrows. "So, you made time for your mother after all? Come on in." He's usually very friendly, but today Anthony seems a little off. Standoffish, I guess- like how most people perceive me, I suppose- or maybe just tense.

As Anthony leads me to the hallway which I know leads to my mother's office, I lock eyes with Myra, who sits beside Al. My heart beats a little bit faster, and I wipe my sweaty palms on my pants legs. I'll have to stop and talk to them on my way out- I don't need them talking to someone at Dauntless claiming that I'm a faction traitor. Hopefully we can just have a friendly conversation, but if I have to resort to threats, I will.

Anthony asks me to wait halfway down the hall before walking to the end and knocking on Evelyn's office door. He slips inside, then comes out and motions me in, slipping out just before I enter. I close the door, and it's just Evelyn and me now.

I set my backpack on the desk and unzip it, unloading the supplies I brought. "It's just bland soup and vegetables, but it's better than nothing," I say.

"Who says I need your help? I'm doing just fine, you know."

I roll my eyes at her. "Just take it. No point in turning down food."

"I'm not." She moves the cans into a box and slides it under the desk. "I'm just not used to you caring. It's a little disarming."

"I'm familiar with the feeling. You didn't check in on my life for seven years, in case you forgot. What's with the hostility, anyway? You're not mad that I'm happy in a faction, are you?"

"Of course not," Evelyn scoffs with a wave of her hand. She smiles, but it doesn't reach her eyes. "Last we spoke, it seemed that you were ready to leave, so I was surprised. But all I want is for you to be happy, of course. Tell me about your life, Tobias. Have you made some new friends that are special to you, or perhaps a girlfriend?" She arches one eyebrow. Just the fact that she asked, when she never has before, brings back that weird feeling of dread that I experience when Tris mentions Evelyn. I make note of it and push it away- I may as well stay on alert, but beyond that, it's not a sensation that will do me any good right now.

"I do have friends that are important to me, but I'm not very good with girls," I say honestly, carefully. "My friend Zeke tries to set me up sometimes, but I usually offend them in the first five minutes." Now is when I flat-out lie. "So, no. It's not about a girl."

"Hmm," Evelyn says with a hint of a frown. There's that rock in my stomach again. "Well, to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? Surely you didn't come _just_ to see me- that would be unlike you," she practically accuses, but in a syrupy-sweet voice. I see her differently, more as someone I need to be very cautious around, ever since Uriah and Tris told me about what happened before.

"Well," I say with the best smile I can muster, "you shouldn't rule that out- but I did have another reason for coming tonight. I've been keeping an eye on Max. You said the Erudite were involved with the Dauntless, and you were right. They're planning something together, Max and Jeanine and some of the other leaders."

I tell her about what I saw on Max's computer and what I have observed about Erudite's attempts to stir up dissent against Abnegation with their articles. Evelyn doesn't look surprised or upset at all. She's totally straight-faced. "Was there any sign of when this might happen?"

"No," I say carefully. I've only gotten _that_ particular information from other sources- people I care about who I don't want involved with Evelyn- and I don't trust her. I won't drag them into this. I don't want to give her any more information that she can use in her attempt to take over our world. "I've warned a council member in Abnegation- not Marcus, someone else. Someone I trust." I run a hand through my hair, then scratch the back of my neck. I'm getting to the hard part of this conversation now.

"Look," I continue, "I know you aren't a fan of the faction system. What I'm asking of you is that _if_ this attack can't be stopped… _if_ there is a war… that you don't try to do anything crazy. Let me find another way. There are other factors at play here."

Evelyn raises her eyebrows. "Such as?"

And… this is why this is so hard. I can't tell her about the Bureau- not only is it too much to get into in one short visit, there is also no way to explain how I know. "I can't tell you that right now. I just need you to trust me."

Evelyn presses her lips into a straight line, and my heart sinks. I guess the trust card isn't going to work, and I have no others to play right now. "I have no lingering affection for Abnegation, nor do I want _any_ faction to control this city and its people. Dauntless is welcome to take out my enemies for me, and I have no intention of letting Erudite or any other faction control the people once that has happened."

"You won't even help save the Abnegation? They will kill _everyone!_ Children, even! You're just going to let that happen?" Evelyn shrugs and my mouth hangs open in disbelief. She's a monster. Why did I ever trust her for even a moment?

Evelyn goes on to make accusations about Abnegation all knowing about Marcus beating her, that they exiled her because of her affair, but I don't believe it for a moment. I saw the shock on the Priors' faces when I said that my mother was alive, and when I told them about Marcus's abuse, and that was genuine. I'm positive of that. My mother is lying to me. I shouldn't be surprised.

I don't even let her finish. "You're lying to me, Evelyn, and I'm not going to stand here and listen to it. I hope you change your mind and grow a conscience. I will still do what I can to improve the faction system if I ever am in _any_ position to do so, but it won't be for _you._ " I don't need her on my side. I can only assume that she would turn on me whenever it worked to her benefit. There is no point in staying here for a single second longer, so I turn and leave.

* * *

 _ **Myra**_

"I wish I had never chosen Dauntless," I sigh, and Al snorts.

"That makes two of us," he mutters. We both made a stupid decision, choosing Dauntless. I should have known better- all the times I was told to choose where _I_ fit in, and I still was stupid enough to follow a boy- one who wouldn't even follow me in return. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I guess I wasn't cut out for Erudite, either. I'm not sure where I would have belonged. Maybe I don't belong anywhere.

I am stewing over this idea that I don't belong in any of the factions when I feel eyes burning into me, and I don't mean Al's. I glance around looking for the source and am startled to see Four, my instructor from Dauntless, staring at me. What on earth is he doing in a Factionless safe house? I watch Four disappear down the hallway that leads to Evelyn's office before I nudge Al.

"Did you see that?"

"Huh? See what?" Al asks, totally clueless. He really isn't very observant, I've noticed.

I jerk my chin in the direction Four went. "I saw Four. He went to Evelyn's office, I think." We spend the next fifteen minutes arguing over whether I could just be so bored that my mind is playing tricks on me- a point that Al is advocating, and I am denying. "Look," I finally say. "If it was him, we'll see him come back out, so just watch. But if it really _was_ Four- and I _know_ that it was, I want to know why the heck he's here."

Al chuckles, and I cock an eyebrow at him. "You're just so _good_ ," Al says. "C'mon, Myra. You live in the damn Factionless safe house and you still say 'heck' instead of 'hell'." I shrug. What's it to him if I choose to keep my manners?

Just then, Four storms out of the corridor and toward the safe house entrance, the one that goes outside. "Holy shit," Al says with wide eyes. "It really _is_ Four."

I smirk. "Told ya." And with that, I'm on my feet, hurrying after my former instructor.

* * *

Four had a head start on me, so it takes me two blocks to catch up. When I'm finally less than half a block away, I call out to him in a whisper-yell, not wanting to attract attention from anyone who may be lurking nearby. I hear a shallow, but loud, panting and glance over my shoulder to see Al following half a block behind me. "Four," I whisper harshly again, and this time he spins 180 degrees and stops, dropping his hands so that his arms rest limply at his sides.

"Oh, right, Myra," he says, shaking his head. "I'm sorry. I meant to talk to you before I left, she just…" he sighs. "Never mind." Now I've caught up and have stopped a yard away from him. "Are you okay? You look like you're handling things well." I glance down at myself. I'm still as slim and willowy as ever, but I haven't yet become gaunt and sickly like some of the Factionless do.

I shrug. "I've been better, but I could be worse," I reply with a light laugh. The corners of Four's mouth turn up just barely into the hint of a smile. "What were you doing talking to Evelyn?"

Four sighs and narrows his eyes at me. "I shouldn't be telling you anything," he mutters, but continues anyway. "Something bad is going on. I want to stop it. Evelyn won't help me- she has her own agenda." Four scratches the back of his neck, then drops his hand limply with sigh.

I take a deep breath. Between Al and me, I'm the observant one. No one has filled me in on anything directly, but I notice things. I glance around, making sure no one is here listening. "I might know something about Evelyn's plans," I say nervously, just loud enough for Four to hear. "But we should be somewhere more… secure." Four nods appreciatively- I have noticed that he's a private person, so I am not surprised at all that he would be more comfortable somewhere private, as well. "First… can I ask you something?" He nods. "How's Edward? Is he doing alright in training? Is he… is he happy with Marlene?" My voice is barely a whisper. When it comes down to it, though, happiness is what I really want for Edward, even though I wouldn't want him back after everything.

Four runs his hands through his hair. "Look… Myra…" he says, and I'm afraid what he might tell me about Edward. Did Peter finally get him for real? Is he even still alive?

"First of all, I just want to say that if you help us stop… all of this… I'll do whatever I can to make sure you get out of this hellhole. They've been trying to get me to join leadership for years, so I may end up in a position to help. If not, I know some people."

I smile in appreciation and glance at Al. "Wherever you can help me go, I would like Al to be able to come with me. If he'd like to, I mean. We've become… close."

Al smiles. "And obviously I will do whatever I can to help, as well," he offers.

"Of course," Four says, nodding once at Al, then he continues. "As for Edward… he isn't with Marlene. They were never together. And yes, he's doing well. He's in second place, among the transfers, anyway." Wait… Edward and Marlene… they were _never_ together? Sure could have fooled me, and I'm usually the smart, observant one. And second place! I'm so proud of him! It may have hurt that he didn't come with me, but we were together for two years and I'll always care about him.

"Who's first?" I can't help asking, even though I'm sure I already know.

Four smirks. "Tris. Fastest simulation times I've ever seen. Oh, I mean, simulations are-"

"I know what they are, and what Dauntless uses them for, Four," I interrupt. I was raised Erudite and we hear about them around here, too.

Four nods. "Look, I don't know what I need yet, other than a way to stop Evelyn from ruining everyone's lives."

I nod. "Just let me tell you what I know about Evelyn, then we can meet up whenever if you need me to do anything. It's not like I do anything these days, so, anytime." And with that, Four ushers me- and Al, who has finally caught up to us- into an abandoned movie theater.

"How'd you know about this place?" I ask. I wonder if they have any films around here that we could watch sometime.

"I took-" Four catches himself, then continues. "I brought someone here the other day. You know, like on a date. Don't tell Evelyn please, though. I had to lie to her about whether I had a girl. I don't want my girlfriend involved with Evelyn. I don't trust that woman."

If he doesn't trust her…

"Why do you come visit and try and work with someone you don't trust?" the Candor-born next to me asks.

Four just glares. "You don't actually think you'll get me to answer that, do you?" He's so menacing at times, but after seeing him with Tris that night, I feel like he's just a big puppy dog trapped in the body of a wolf.

I nudge Al with my elbow and teasingly say, "Remember what he said to Christina on Choosing Day? You can't act like a Candor around Four, Al, he doesn't like it." Al seems to get the message, and I know he doesn't want to mess with Four, so he shuts up.

"So, what can you tell me?" Four asks, now ignoring Al's presence in the large, dim room.

I take a deep breath and begin to spill out everything I've heard.

One night, I approached Evelyn's office door to ask about a new pair of shoes- the soles of the ones they had given me were practically flapping around when I walked. She was in there with Anthony and Therese, and the door was not quite latched, so I stopped to listen.

Evelyn, it turns out, has been waiting for the faction system to fall apart. She didn't say a lot about the details of that plan, but there was also a 'Plan B'. In the event that Erudite is 'neutralized' before they manage to send the whole system into chaos, she plans to surprise-attack Dauntless, likely in the wee hours of the morning.

"You see," I tell Four, "the Factionless has triple the population of the entire faction of Dauntless. We're larger than _any_ of the factions, actually. Besides that, a large proportion of the Factionless are ex-Dauntless, what with the cuts during initiation and Dauntless' throwing people out when they get a little older. There was some other factor too but she didn't say enough about it for me to understand."

Four nods slowly, thinking. "So, what's stopping her?"

"She needs weapons," I reply. "She needs someone from Dauntless with a high clearance level for security- and a _recent_ one. No one here right now fits that description. She needs to break into the weapons room to get the guns and ammunition, but does not have the security codes and such that she needs to do so without losing too many of her… army, I guess you could call it."

"Okay, so, she's just waiting for the right person to come along?" By the worried look on his face, I can tell he knows this isn't the case.

"Look, Four, I don't know who it is," I tell him, though at the moment I certainly have a guess- it's probably Four himself. "But she said something about her _son._ I think her son is in Dauntless, and he's the one that can get her what she needs."

"And what makes her think she can get her son to betray his faction," Four spits.

That's the part I don't know, so I just shrug. "Do you know who her son might be?"

"Yeah," he says reluctantly. "Yeah, I know who it is." Four sighs. "Okay, well, thank you, Myra. This is helpful. It's a shame Dauntless didn't keep you- sure, you need to learn to fight to be there, but with more time maybe you could have. You'd be a great addition to intelligence, though." I smile proudly.

Four turns to Al, acknowledging him again for the first time in a while. "If you tell anyone you saw me here, consider yourself a dead man. Got it?" Al nods, wide-eyed, and Four turns back to me. "I had better get back before anyone important notices I left. Keep your ears open, and I'll try to be in touch soon." And without another word, Four turns and walks out of the abandoned Cinema.


	26. Chapter 25

_****A/N: This chapter also has an M-rated version; you can find a separate story through my page that has all the M-rated scenes if you're interested.****_

 _ ** **Chapter Disclaimer: This chapter contains implied adult-intimate situations and references to sex. If you are uncomfortable with this, please do not continue to read.****_

* * *

 **CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE**

 _ **Uriah**_

"Uri?" Mar snaps her fingers in front of my face, and Tris stares at me from across the table with her lips pressed together in a straight line and a wrinkle between her eyebrows.

"Huh?" I say, like an idiot.

Tris frowns. "Marlene's been trying to get your attention and you were totally zoned out." She leans toward me and lowers her voice. "Just relax. Or, try, anyway."

I swallow hard and nod. All day, my mind keeps flashing to that day in Abnegation when Four and Peter barely saved Tris from Erudite. Tris always has just like… this fire in her eyes, it's like she has so much spirit and determination that you can actually _see_ it. It's what draws people to her. But that day, I worried that Jeanine Matthews had done the impossible and really extinguished it for good. Tris was gaunt and weak, her usually shining golden hair dull and limp, and she hunched in this defeated sort of way… she didn't look like our Tris at all.

Oops… I zoned out again. Marlene's voice snaps me back out of it. "What the hell is going on with him?!"

Tris's eyes dart as she looks around the dining hall quickly, as though Marlene even asking made her nervous. "I can't tell you here," she hisses. Then she raises her voice to a normal volume. "He's nervous about something… you know…" She just sighs. "Uriah, why don't you do something fun? Get your mind off everything? Just keep a low profile."

* * *

I decided that I didn't want to be out in the open anywhere I could come across Eric, and that I needed to chill the hell out, so we stopped off at the control room for Zeke's key and went to his place to hang out. When we walked in I went straight to the fridge and got out one beer for Marlene and two for me.

"What is going on with you, Uriah?" Marlene says, concerned.

I sigh. I don't want to drag her into this any more than I already have. Jeanine… and Eric… are manipulative and conniving. Knowing what kind of danger I may be in and why might put Marlene in danger as well, and I don't want to take that chance. "I don't want to talk about it right now. I just need a distraction."

Marlene smirks. "A distraction, huh?" She sets her open beer on the coffee table and goes to the kitchen. I lay back on the couch, sipping my beer with one hand behind my head. I raise my eyebrows when she returns with a bottle of tequila, shot glass, bowl of limes and a salt shaker. You can always count on Zeke to have all the party supplies.

Three shots later, Marlene hops up and turns on the stereo to some upbeat dance music. She sways her hips seductively and beckons me curling one finger. I'm beginning to feel a bit of a buzz from the tequila and beer and damn she's sexy. I grin as I approach her, and once I'm close, she turns so her back is facing me, still dancing- and she's a damn good dancer, too.

Marlene's back presses against my chest and I run my hands down her sides, past her waist and along her hips. We continue dancing for three or four songs, I don't even know, all I can think about is the way her body feels under my fingertips and the way her ass grinds against me.

Suddenly she stops and turns to me. I crash my lips to hers, but she pulls away much sooner than I'd like. I open my mouth to speak and she presses a finger against my lips. "I have an idea," she says in a low voice.

I follow my girlfriend back to the couch but we don't sit down. She pours me a shot, hands me the salt shaker, then taps the hollow where her shoulder meets her neck as she holds the rind of a lime slice between her teeth, grinning. Oh, hell yes.

I grin as I lean in to suck on her neck. Pulling away with one last lick of my tongue, I shake salt over the wet flesh. I look Marlene slowly up and down, then I grin and carefully nestle the full shot glass between her boobs and she giggles as my hands linger on her exposed cleavage. "This was a great idea, gorgeous," I whisper to her before I suck again at that same spot on her neck, grab the shot glass with my teeth, knocking it back and dropping it on the couch when it's empty, then quickly bite the lime she holds between her teeth. We kiss deeply for a moment before I toss the lime aside, I don't care where it ended up, and I pull her down onto the couch with me, capturing her lips and kissing hungrily.

Giggling, Mar straddles me, rolling her hips against me. "You are so damn sexy," I mumble against her lips, and she moans as I run my hands up the inside of her thighs.

"When will Zeke be back?" she whispers against my lips as she tugs at the hem of my shirt.

I pull her shirt quickly over her head and answer, "He's working for a few more hours, and I have his key," as I stare at her gorgeous body, my hands running up her stomach to her chest. She pulls my shirt swiftly over my head and tosses it aside, then her lips are on mine again, her tongue running across my lower lip. I immediately open my mouth for her and our tongues battle for dominance- she quickly allows me to win.

I expertly unhook her bra and toss it aside. She whimpers and moans as I caress her body with my hands and lips, then I stand her up and we kiss hungrily as we finish undressing each other.

We move against each other, and though neither of us are inexperienced, this is different. It's a first for me, because this isn't just sex. I finally understand what people really mean when they talk about 'making love'. My heart belongs to her and I know hers belongs to me. We were together only a couple times before she died, before came back, and we did love each other then… but I love her now in a way that is more powerful than I could ever have imagined, and I never expected it could change _everything_ so completely.

She takes me to new heights and by her reaction I'm guessing I do for her, too. I collapse against her and pull out after a moment then move to the couch, pulling her with me and spreading out the blanket from the back of the couch over us.

Marlene curls into my chest, and I press kisses to the top of her head and wrap my arms around her, listening to her breaths slowly become even and steady as she falls asleep.

* * *

We wake about an hour later and quickly get dressed. "Want any help cleaning this up?" Marlene asks.

"No," I say, "you go ahead to the dorms. I need to get this key back to Zeke and talk to him about something real quick, then I'll see you there, okay?"

Marlene smiles at me and nods, and I grab her hand and pull her to me for a long, tender kiss before I let go and say goodbye to her with a grin.

It doesn't take too long to clean up the limes and bottles, and find the shot glass I threw on the couch, which ended up stuck between the cushions. Zeke isn't really a neat freak, so I don't worry too much about any mess I might have missed. If I did, it's because it got mixed in with his own clutter.

When I got Zeke's key earlier, I told him I would be coming back to talk to him. I just want him to keep an eye out for me on the monitors because I'm worried about Eric. I'm nervous to tell Zeke the reason- my divergence- but he's my brother, I can trust him.

As I'm walking past the hallway that goes up the stairs to the tracks, a hand clasps over my mouth and I am pulled into the dimly lit stairwell. I try to struggle against whoever grabbed me, but he's got me in a tight hold. I recognize the maze tattoo on his arm and I know I'm screwed. I may be a good fighter, but this is Eric, and I'm a little slow from the tequila. I just _know_ that winning this fight is not happening this time. Still, I kick my leg back and hear a grunt, but it's not enough.

"You come with me without a fight," Eric growls in my ear, "or I'm going after your girl. So who do you want to save, Divergent scum? Yourself… or Marlene?"

I gulp. This is exactly what I was afraid of- that I would put Marlene in danger. But if I go with him right now, if I cooperate, well, my life is over. I know I'm sealing my fate. But saving Marlene was the thing I cared most about when I came back and I'll do whatever it takes.

I nod my head and he removes his hand from my mouth. "I go with you, and you leave her the hell alone." I pause, realizing there is something else I want from him. "And one more thing. You tell me how you found out. Do we have a deal?"

The holes in Eric's face from his multitude of piercings stretch as his lips twist into a sadistic grin. "We've got a deal."


	27. Chapter 26

_**A/N: I feel bad that I left you with a cliffhanger, then took a little longer than usual to update- not too long though, right? I'm having some technical difficulties. (Literally... computer problems.) So just know it's possible that updates will be slightly slower than usual, but don't worry, I pinky promise that I will not abandon this story! xoxo**_

* * *

 **CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX**

 _ **Uriah**_

"So are you gonna tell me how you saw my sim, or what?"

The city flies past in a dark blur out the open door of the train car. The zip tie securing my hands behind my back digs into my wrists and Eric watches me like a hawk to make sure I don't try to make a run for it. I won't. Not with Marlene's safety on the line.

Eric smirks. "Simple. I programmed the computer we run the sims from to send them straight to my personal computer electronically, the moment they finish recording. That idiot _Four_ " -he spits Four's name like it's poison- "can delete sims all he wants. It doesn't keep me from seeing any of them."

Simple as that. There was no way for Four to protect us. I was screwed from the moment I stepped into that simulation room for the first time. I sigh and look away. There was nothing I could do to prevent it, and now I'm going to be forced to help that demon-spawn Jeanine, only to be executed in thanks.

But, why didn't this happen last time? Something changed. Something one of us did… changed everything.

"What made you decide to do that? And when?"

Eric scoffs. "I already answered what I agreed to, I told you how I found out. Why should I tell you anything else?"

I contemplate that for a while. I don't have a reason to give him. He has no reason to indulge me. Eric is an Erudite deep down, all about logic and strategy. But… one thing Erudite and Dauntless have in common? We're prideful. And Eric has pride for his Dauntless persona, too.

"Why _not_ tell me? I'm never getting out of this hellhole you're taking me to, right? Indulge me. At least let me understand why I'm here. You know, unless you're _afraid_ for some reason. That would be pretty pathetic, wouldn't it? Big, bad Dauntless leader Eric, Erudite spy, faction traitor… afraid of an initiate whose hands are zip-tied behind his back and who will never see the light of day again."

I see something flash in Eric's eyes and I know I've won. Yep, insulting Eric's pride is the sore spot, the psychological kick in the nuts. I raise my eyebrows as he glares at me, waiting for him to start speaking. Because I know he will.

"Fine," Eric says, feigning boredom. "It was the Stiff. She was like a puzzle. Showed up fresh out of Abnegation, feisty and confident from day one. It didn't make any sense, it still doesn't. She intrigues me."

"Okay, so?" Maybe there's a little Erudite in me, too, because I'm definitely brimming with curiosity tonight. I mean, hey, this is probably the last time ever that I get something _I_ want, and what I want to know is exactly how I ended up here. Exactly how I have been ripped away from the girl I love once again by these monsters.

Eric shrugs. "So, I wanted to see her fears, and I also wanted to see if divergence was the key to that puzzle. But then her fears, specifically the one Four deleted, just showed me I didn't stand a chance with her. He'd won already, like always." The look in his eyes is murderous. I knew he hated Four but I'm not sure I realized just how much until this moment.

"And? Is she?" I ask, hoping to hear that Tris, at least, is safe. You know… unless she acts like _Tris_ and does something stupid and selfless. Who am I kidding? There's no way she won't. She had better not drag Marlene into it. My head starts feeling all floaty from anxiety just thinking about it. Eric looks at me like he has no idea what I'm asking him. "Tris. Is she divergent?"

"Nope. Just you." He leans out the open door, then pops his head back in. "Well, looks like we're just about at our stop. I kept my part of the bargain, now all you have to do is cooperate and I'll leave your little slut alone. Besides, think of it this way." Eric grimaces. "Despite your defective brain, you get to do some good in the world by helping science rid the world of divergent scum like you."

It takes every ounce of me not to push him out of the train, but with my hands tied up like this, there's too great a chance I'd lose. And if I did, it would all be for nothing. I know he wouldn't hesitate for a moment and Marlene would be dead.

So I just glare at him, hating him in this moment more than I have ever hated anyone, more than I ever knew I was capable of hating. I hate Eric the way the bastard himself hates Four.

But it doesn't matter now. It's time to jump- time to jump to what is very likely to be a slow, painful death.

* * *

 _ **Zeke**_

The minute hand on the clock is moving so slowly, I could swear it's broken, but it still matches the time on my watch so i guess it's just me. At this rate, the ten minutes left in my shift will feel like hours.

The door opens and Four comes in, dropping into the seat next to me. "Man, am I glad to see you! Entertain me, bro!" I say as I fist bump him. "Where have you been, anyway? I saw you on the monitors, hopping out of the train."

"I had a thing to take care of," Four says, not making eye contact with me. I love the dude like a brother but he's so secretive sometimes. I don't really bother wondering any more- that's just him, I guess.

"Hey, what are you doing the rest of the night? I gotta find Uriah first, the little shit never brought my key back, but then we could hang out. We haven't had enough bro-time lately," I say as I skim my eyes over the monitors real quick then turn back to my buddy.

Four's face stays all serious and it takes me a minute to see that he actually looks worried. "He was supposed to return your key? When?"

"Uh… whenever he was done there with Marlene. But you know, it's Uriah. He probably just got all caught up with his girl and forgot. He's irresponsible like that."

I don't know what the hell is going on with Four tonight but he's freaking me out. He pushes me out of the way and starts typing like a madman and pulls up a screen I recognize, it's the hallway my apartment is in. "When did you give it to him?"

"Uh… around seven, I guess." It's almost midnight now. Four's whole body looks tense and he's concentrating so hard I think his head might explode. I watch the monitor that he's looking at as he starts reviewing the footage in reverse, from now back, until I see someone exit my apartment and call out. "There!"

Four pauses the footage and we look at the time stamp. 10:15 PM. That was an hour and forty-five minutes ago, almost. Four starts it going forward again at regular speed and he looks almost scared now as he pulls up camera after camera, following my brother who appeared to be coming right to the control room. Seriously, I don't even recognize this look on Four's face. "What don't I know, Four? Is something going on with my brother that you haven't told me?" If he's keeping something from me about Uriah I swear to God…

"There!" Four shouts, and the other guy working, James, glares at us- he heard Four over whatever noise is in his headphones. Four backs it up about 30 seconds and I watch in slow motion as someone grabs my little brother and pulls him into a stairwell… and he doesn't come out.

Something is definitely wrong, and Four definitely knew Uri was in trouble. And he didn't tell me.

The stairwell he was pulled into leads to the train tracks. Four pulls up the camera for the tracks and backs it up. About five minutes after Uriah was grabbed in the hallway, we see two figures in black hoodies exit. One looks like Uriah's build, and his hands are behind his back. The stance of the other looks very familiar but I can't quite place it.

Four must see it in the look on my face- how mad I am, all the questions in my eyes- main ones being, what the hell is going on with my brother, who did he get on that train with, and why didn't you tell me? "We can't talk about this here, Zeke," he mutters. "Come on, we're getting Tris and then we're gonna figure this out."

I don't say anything until we are in the hall, then I glare at Four. "You know what, Four? No. We're not going to get Tris. What the hell do you think your little Stiff initiate girlfriend is gonna do?! We're not wasting time going down there."

"Yes we are, Zeke," he practically growls. Seriously, for real, dude? I don't think he has any right to be upset with _me_ right now. "You just need to trust me on this, okay? I'll- we'll- we'll try to explain when we get back to my place but just _trust me._ Uriah would want Tris to help us with this. She will know more than anyone."

I shake my head and keep shooting him glares, but I can tell he isn't going to help me until he has Tris with him. He's probably just worried something will happen to her, too. I don't see how on earth she could possibly help us.

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

I knew what had happened the moment I opened my eyes to see Tobias and Zeke staring at me. I'm glad Tobias doesn't have carpet, because I'd probably have worn a hole in it by now with my pacing. Tobias is sitting in a kitchen chair with his head in his hands and Zeke is pretty much just scowling at me; I feel like I need to prove that I will be an asset in getting Uriah back from Erudite, because he definitely seems to be irritated at my presence. That's hard to do, though, when I haven't the slightest clue what to tell him about _how_ I know about what Jeanine will do to Uriah in her lab, about where exactly the cells and labs are that we will need to find, or even just about everything related to this impending war- not in the detail I know about all of it, anyway.

Zeke barely knows me, what is he going to think of me? Something tells me Zeke will not be as willing as my parents were to accept that I 'just know' things. They accepted it on faith in my character; Zeke is more likely to just think I am mentally ill. I don't think Tobias' and Uriah's (presumed) trust in me will be enough for Zeke with his brother's safety and probably even life on the line.

"Four, did we go get your girlfriend just to watch her pace your floor? I thought you said she could help? We're wasting time, man!" Zeke sounds the angriest I've ever heard him. I have to come up with something, I can't keep him waiting any longer.

Tobias tries to start explaining. "Uriah is divergent. Eric has taken him. Tris, where is he?"

"How would she know?!" Zeke exclaims, before I can answer.

I sigh. That is the burning question- how do I know? I still don't have an acceptable answer, so I ignore Zeke and just answer Tobias. "Jeanine Matthews has him. She needs a divergent to run tests on, study how his brain works, divergent-proof her serums. She'll start by imaging his brain, then probably do other tests too while they work improving their serums to target divergents. The labs and cells are on the same floor, it's the ninth floor at the Erudite Headquarters. It's huge and kind of a maze, but I think I can remember where to go, pretty much anyway."

Tobias nods but Zeke stares at me with his mouth open. "How do you know any of this?" he explodes. "Are you some kind of double agent or something?!"

I have to lie and I have to do it _now._ I don't even know where the next words out of my mouth come from but I hope he'll believe them. "My mother helps divergents escape the city when they're in danger. Tori's brother, for example. My father was Erudite-born. I've overheard things. That's all I can tell you."

Zeke glares. "Then why didn't you help my brother escape, if you knew he was in trouble?" Zeke says through gritted teeth. "If your mother knows how to help them, why didn't she help Uriah?" It's a fair question.

"He wouldn't have wanted her to," Tobias says, shaking his head. "There's a war coming. Max and Eric are working with Erudite. They'll be putting us all under a mind control serum in just a few days, but it won't work on divergents. We need divergents here to stop it. Look, man, Tris and I are divergent, too- we know what it is to be in this kind of danger, but we have to stop Dauntless from mindlessly killing the entire faction of Abnegation, and your brother is committed to that cause."

Zeke's eyes widen. He stares at Tobias with his mouth dropped open for awhile- long enough to make me really nervous- and finally says, "Look, Four, I'm pretty pissed that you have kept _all this shit_ from me, and right now, you and me? We're not okay." Tobias looks down and nods. "But right now, we are going to put that aside and save my brother. Either of you have an aptitude for Erudite?"

I raise my hand, and Zeke nods. "Figures," he mumbles. "Okay then, Tris is in charge of forming a plan. Make it good, Tris. We are _not_ losing my brother."

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

The cell is small- maybe six by six feet at best. So small, in fact, that I can't stretch all the way out on the narrow cot to sleep. Even if I could, it's too bright; the lights may be somewhat dim, but they come from all around- the walls, floor and ceiling are all made of light panels. It almost reminds me of coming out of the blackness to see Tris and her parents in, I guess, Heaven. There, I was entirely surrounded by white light. But here, I just feel like I'll have a new fear if I make it out of this- claustrophobia.

All I can do is sit here. I tried pacing, but every two steps I had to turn around and I got dizzy soon enough. In a way, though, the dizziness was a welcome distraction. I'd exercise, but my only option is sit-ups and after a couple hundred of those I couldn't push myself to do any more. Push ups are out of the question for the same reason I can't stretch out to sleep: the room is simply too small.

When Tris was imprisoned here, I'm sure there were tons of Dauntless guards- after all, this is where the Dauntless Traitors were based. This time, though, I've only seen one. I suppose Dauntless probably keeps a guard or two at all or most of the factions at all times. At this point I'm sure they don't want to cause any suspicion of what they're about to do, so none have yet been sent here. Erudite has their own guards, and several of them helped to escort me to my cell, but they're all a joke. They wouldn't be hard to beat. The question is, is it even worth it to try? I might not make it out of here, and I'd put Marlene at risk once again.

They took my shoes, and for some reason I cannot fathom, my socks. My feet are cold. They did let me keep my hoodie, clothes and watch, though. It was half past eleven when they shut me in this cell last night, so I'm exhausted, since I wasn't able to fall asleep scrunched up and surrounded by light. My watch reads 7:14. I'm sure Jeanine will come to start her tests on me very soon- wouldn't want to interrupt the demon's beautyrest, of course.

I pace again, until I get dizzy. It's now 7:17. Welp, that killed three minutes. Boredom was actually a fear in my fear landscape. If I get out of here, it will either be something I've conquered and out of my landscape entirely, or it will move to the very end, my worst fear. It's impossible to predict.

It's also pointless to predict, because who am I kidding? I won't ever be getting out of here. I will die here. I'm not like Tris- she always knows what to do. She knows how to think like an Erudite, and I don't, so she can manipulate them, and I can't.

I sit on the floor, lean my head back onto the cot, and close my eyes. I picture Marlene dancing, and I smile. I hum the song that was playing, I imagine the feel of her skin under my fingers-

The door swings open. "Hello, Uriah." I recognize the voice, I've heard it before. Jeanine Matthews. Maybe I'll just ignore her and pretend to be asleep. But I'm dying to get out of this tiny room, and she would make someone drag me, anyway. So, slowly, I lift my head, open my eyes, and glare at her.

"Hello, Spawn of Satan," I reply, making no effort to get to my feet.

She purses her lips. "I take it Erudite was not one of your aptitudes. Come along," she tuts. I roll my eyes as I pull myself up. My body is aching and fatigued, right down to my bones.

"Is there any way I can get you to turn down the damn lights in there? Between how small the cell is and all that light, I didn't get a second of sleep all night."

Jeanine smiles, but she's either not much of an actor or looking like the fakest bitch this city has ever seen was her intention to begin with. "I could do that, but I don't see how it would be to my benefit to waste time doing so." I just want to punch that woman literally every time she opens her mouth.

The room she leads me into has a big weird contraption made of metal and plastic. I think I've seen one in a textbook before, but I can't remember what it does, probably because I never paid much attention to begin with.

There are a half dozen other people in this room, all wearing glasses and white lab coats. I scan the room and when I reach a certain familiar face, I narrow my eyes. He notices my glare and shifts uncomfortably. I laugh slightly. "Scared of me, Caleb?" Caleb looks away. "Pansycake," I mutter.

Jeanine clears her throat then starts her little lecture, making me feel like I'm back in school again. I hated school. I thought I was done with that for good, but apparently I get to die feeling like I am back there again.

"Today we have a rather unconfirmed divergent with us," Jeanine begins. "My liaison within Dauntless insists that he is in fact divergent, but is excellent at hiding that fact in his simulations." Well, at least that's a little praise. I continue to glare at Caleb and he looks more and more uncomfortable the longer I stare. It's the one bit of fun I get to have today.

"Uriah," Jeanine says and I automatically turn my head toward the sound of my name. Dang it! She distracted me from making Caleb uncomfortable! "I have reviewed your aptitude test. You received an aptitude of Dauntless without any manipulation or signs of simulation awareness."

"Yep," I say. "I've never said I was divergent. Eric did. And considering he threatened my girlfriend, it's not like I wasn't gonna come here." I scowl.

Jeanine taps her fingernails on the counter. "Hmm, I see." She motions to her minions, who lead me to the human-sized tray in front of the giant machine. "This is a Magnetic Resonance Imaging machine, Uriah. You will need to lay completely still until-"

"This is a what?" I interrupt, not knowing what the heck a magnetic whatever is.

"Magnetic resonance imaging," she says very slowly, as if I were a three year old. "More commonly known by the acronym MRI." Then why didn't she just say that? She's so snooty and pretentious. Yeah, I know big words, too. I roll my eyes at her; she notices and scowls at me.

Jeanine continues, "you will need to lay completely still until the scan is complete."

They try to pull me down onto the tray but I refuse to budge. "Why?"

"So we can get a clear image."

"No." I shake my head. "I meant, why are you doing this scan?"

Jeanine sighs. "I don't believe that is your concern. You are here to cooperate, not to ask questions."

Some of the transfers and I discussed the faction manifestos once. I remember Will telling me how to get information out of an Erudite- use her own manifesto against her. "Every question that can be answered must be answered or at least engaged," I retort, trying to create a telepathic connection with Will so I can fist bump him in my mind. Which, of course, doesn't work.

Jeanine's face scrunches up in a very satisfying way and she pinches the bridge of her nose. There's no way she can deny my request for information in front of all these people. She sighs. "This scan will provide us with images of your brain. We will compare them to typical brains and look for anomalies."

I shrug, having received the answers I wanted, and lay on the tray. Leather cuffs are wrapped around my arms, legs, chest, and shoulders and everyone clears out of the room before the giant tray begins sliding into the big machine. I close my eyes as the loud pounding noise begins and daydream about the girl I love- the girl I will never see again.


	28. Chapter 27

**CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN**

 _ **Uriah**_

I have been at Erudite for almost two days; it's evening now. That means that tomorrow is the final test of Dauntless initiation- the Fear Landscape.

They have been performing various medical tests- other than the MRI, I really don't know what most of them were, just that they drew a lot of blood and did a few 'biopsies' as they called them, where basically they cut samples of my flesh out of me. I haven't slept much because they still won't turn down the lights in that cell, but eventually I have gotten exhausted enough that I could fall asleep anywhere, so I've gotten a few hours in here and there.

A couple of the pathetic Erudite guards open my cell door. Maybe I should just take them now, escape, run out of here. But then, I still have to worry about Eric, and he _will_ hurt Marlene. Every cell in my body is telling me to fight and it would be so easy to disarm them, but I can't. I can't risk it. If I could take out Eric, that would be one thing, but I don't see how I can expect to do that, when I don't even know when he will be here at Erudite again. So I cooperate. I let their wimpy guards think they are any more use than Caleb on his own would be- they aren't. I'm not in great condition at the moment- physically exhausted, hurting from sleeping curled up on a stiff cot and from the biopsies and crap, underfed, head is pounding- but I could still easily take them. I'm Dauntless, one of the best in my initiation class.

When we get to the lab room where they'll have me this evening- it's nearly dinner time- it's a smaller room than usual, without the usual crowd of brown-nosing scientists. There are monitors and computers and electrodes, some desks, and in the center of the room… a simulation chair. In the room wait only two people: Jeanine, and Caleb Prior.

"Satan Spawn; Lemming," I say, nodding at Jeanine, then Caleb. I know he'll know what a lemming is, he is fascinated by all kinds of boring crap. I remember learning about them in some book the teacher read to us in lower levels. Caleb is just like one of those- he'll follow Jeanine right off a damn cliff. Jeanine makes that satisfying lip-pursing face and Caleb scowls at me. I just smirk at them, never taking my eyes off Caleb. I guess I must have picked up a few things from Four, because I know I intimidate the hell out of that coward.

Jeanine doesn't bother greeting me. "The image of your brain did give us enough information to develop a new serum. Our goal is to create a serum which the divergent cannot overcome; in other words, you should not be capable of discerning simulation from reality. You will demonstrate it for us today. Once we have succeeded in developing a serum which you are unable to distinguish from reality, we will no longer need you."

"And then I get to go home?" I know the answer to this. I'm never going home. I'm divergent, and Jeanine wants to wipe people like me off the face of the earth.

Jeanine chuckles. "Of course not. When you are no longer of use, you will be executed." Caleb is preparing something over at the countertop, then moves to a computer and begins reading lines of code. I watch for a moment, zoning out whatever Jeanine is saying to me, and watch the lines and lines of seemingly random characters run across the screen. Zeke is really good at computers, and he taught me most everything already. Computer code is like a language, and it's one that I'm nearly fluent in.

That's why by the time Jeanine is interrupted by a knock at the door, I've figured out what Caleb is working on. He's putting finishing touches and checking for errors in the program that will control Dauntless when they attack Abnegation.

My mind races. I have to protect Marlene from Eric, but I also have to get that hard drive. It's a part of the evidence we need to take to Candor.

My attention is drawn to the conversation Jeanine is having at the doorway.

"...is on his way to your office. He says he doesn't have time to wait on you."

"Fine," Jeanine says crossly. She turns to Caleb. "Caleb, you need to ensure that the subject is secure until I return. I trust that you can finish your work on the program while you guard Uriah. I will return with Eric when our meeting concludes." She does not wait for an answer, though Caleb bobs his head like a total suck up- which, of course, he is- as the door latches shut.

Eric is here, in this building. The program is on the hard drive of the computer just yards away from me. The guards in this building are completely worthless against a trained Dauntless, and I'm in a room that is _not_ locked by a keypad.

The restraints on my wrists are the only problem. They are, however, only made of leather, with a closure that's just like a belt buckle. I can find a way, I know it.

Unfortunately, Caleb is watching. I have to get out of these restraints undetected.

"So, Prior, how's it feel to plan the murders of your own family? And force your sister to be a part of it, no less."

He grunts and looks back to his screen. Perfect. I'm going to lay on the guilt trip nice and heavy. Make him ashamed enough, and he won't look at me. I wiggle my arms back and forth- the right restraint is looser.

"Not that you're really her brother anymore anyway. Faction Before Blood, after all. All those years that you made her feel bad for not being _selfless_ enough." I laugh as I twist my wrist and wriggle it so my fingers are near the end of the leather. "All those years you made her feel like she was less than you, all because she didn't give up a seat on the bus or carry someone's groceries. You and I, we both know who the selfless one _really_ is of the Prior kids. We know which one will make mama proud and which she'll be ashamed of."

Caleb is staring intently at the screen, clenching his jaw. I'm hitting a sore spot. I continue working the leather strap with my middle finger, as it's the only one long enough to reach.

Caleb doesn't look away from the screen as he says through gritted teeth, "It doesn't matter. Faction Before Blood, remember? Unless you're a traitor."

"Oh no," I reply, continuing to inch the leather to the left with my finger. "No, I'm not a traitor. But I think helping exterminate the entire faction that raised you is a bit extreme. That's not just about being a traitor to your faction, that's being a traitor to humanity. That's just evil."

Soon the tail of the leather strap is out… I just need to pull it back and tight enough to release the tongue of the buckle. "Your sister isn't a faction traitor either, but she still has a conscience. It's no wonder she decided to find a _new_ brother within her own faction." I twist my arm back so it looks as he expects- I don't want him noticing that he hasn't looked at me in a while and glancing at the wrong time.

Caleb's eyes snap to mine just when I wanted them to. In his eyes I see embarrassment and anger. "What do you mean a 'new brother'?"

I shrug my shoulders. "Me, of course. I always have her back. I encourage her instead of giving her those disapproving glares you always used to. Remember me? From the choosing ceremony?" Caleb looks at me one more time like he has finally noticed that he's seen me outside of this prison, then he looks back to his computer work, glaring at the screen intently. I twist my arm uncomfortably again, and work the buckle tongue out of the hole. The pressure on my wrist fully releases as I pull it free. "You were wrong about her having a thing for me, though. She's got a thing for someone else. He's a few years older. They're very… very… close. She doesn't talk to me about _that_ stuff but by the way she was smiling the other morning..." I chuckle for effect. Implying his sister is being screwed by an older guy will get his goat. I've almost pushed him over the edge, and it's been damn fun. He's glaring at that screen so hard he just might go blind. He's not seeing a thing I'm doing. I quickly unbuckle the other wrist. "No, I'm just the brother she never had."

I knew that would get him. Caleb may be Erudite, but being 'smart' doesn't make a person wise. Caleb turns, furious, and lunges at me. He was going to put his hands around my throat, but he didn't expect that I was no longer restrained. I dodge his hands and slide under them, turning and kicking him in the back as I stand up behind him. When Caleb turns, his eyes are filled with rage, but he backs up as I come at him, closing him between me and the counter.

Except… it seems maybe that's just what he _wanted_ me to do, because he reaches back and grabs a glass beaker with some sort of orange fluid in it. I try to duck as he brings the beaker down on my head, but I was just barely too slow. Quick enough to avoid the intended impact, but the glass still breaks on the side left side of my head, and I stagger backward, some of the chemical dripping into my eye. It burns and my vision blurs; good thing I moved when I did, or I wouldn't be able to see out of _either_ eye. My hand automatically goes to the part of my head that was hit, and it is smeared with blood when I pull it away.

Out of my good eye, I see Caleb charge at me and I step out of the way, leaving one foot out to trip him. He sprawls over the tile floor cursing. It takes him a moment to recover, and a moment is too long in a fight; when he tries to push up on his arms, I knock him back with a couple of kicks to the ribs, then keep him down by pressing my foot hard on his back.

Caleb turns his head to look up at me and I smirk as I carefully bend, transferring the weight pinning him down to my knee. "You picked the wrong side, _coward,_ " I say before punching him hard in the temple, and he's out like a light.

Quickly, I drag him to the simulation chair and strap his wrists down tight. I search the cabinets and find zip ties, I assume placed there in case they needed them for my own wrists, and I secure his forearms and his ankles to the chair as well. There's no way that know-it-all is getting free on his own now.

Next I need that hard drive. I work quickly, popping open the side of the console and scanning the many components with my eyes. About a minute later I have freed the hard drive and stuffed it into my back pocket. I glance down at my bare feet, then at Caleb's; his shoes look about my size, so I remove them and pull them quickly onto my feet. They're ugly dress shoes, totally impractical for running, but better than barefoot and they fit well enough.

The door isn't locked in any way, and when I peek my head out there aren't even guards nearby. These Erudite really are arrogant.

Now that I'm out in the hallway, though, I have a problem. I don't know how to get out of this building. Every hallway looks the same as the next, and I can only see out of one eye. The blur from my left makes it hard to see much of anything, so I try to keep the damaged eye closed. It stings more that way, but it's more important that I can see. I pad quietly down the hall. I think I came from the third hallway down on the left, so I try that first.

The second random turn I take, my arm is grabbed by an Erudite guard. He's weak and inexperienced at combat, and it doesn't take me long to gain the advantage. I've got the guard's arms twisted behind his back and have just punched him in the temple when I feel the air shift behind me.

I react, I turn and punch, but he catches my arm. He was too fast for me.

That familiar sadistic grin stretches the piercing holes in that creepy, familiar way and I am mad as hell at the sight of his face. He thinks he's won. But Eric is always second best, and today, he's gonna be second best to me.


	29. Chapter 28

**CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT**

 _ **Tris**_

The longer I am on this train, the faster my heart races. I press myself closer against Tobias. "It'll be okay, Tris," he murmurs into my ear. "We'll get him back."

Soon the train will reach Erudite, and we will jump out. Then we'll just have to get to their headquarters undetected, sneak in without anyone seeing us, make it up to the ninth floor, and find Uriah. Oh, and deal with any traitors we find, of course. We know that Eric left the Dauntless compound on the train twenty minutes before ours.

"It's not just that." My voice trembles. "It was horrible there. I'm afraid I'll panic. What if I freak out and mess everything up? What if I put everyone in danger?"

Tobias is silent for a while before he answers. "Tris, I've noticed something about you. _Fear doesn't shut you down, it wakes you up._ I think you'll know what to do and you'll do it. But I've always got your back. I promise. Just don't leave me again, okay?"

I pull him in for a kiss. What we're doing tonight is dangerous. Something could happen to one of us, and this could be our last time together. Tobias pulls away and rests his forehead against mine. "Promise me, Tris." His voice is rough and thick.

The night I left for Erudite last time flashes in my memory, his desperate pleading for me to choose _him._ I didn't think of it as choosing him at the time; all I saw was that my life was not worth all the lives that could be lost. My eyes sting and I squeeze them shut tight to hold back the tears- tears of guilt for how I have hurt him. _No more lies, no more secrets, no more broken promises,_ I vow to myself.

"I promise," I breathe, and I seal it with one last kiss before we jump.

The five of us- Four, Zeke, Marlene and Edward- have somehow managed to circle around the alleys of the Erudite sector, eventually ending behind Erudite headquarters. Zeke, Tobias and I decided to include Marlene before she even had a chance to wake up and notice Uriah's untouched bed. There was no way she would let us go without her, and Edward was a part of the deal- not only is he an excellent fighter and marksman, he grew up in Erudite and knows his way around and how things work here.

Marlene tests the door that she and Uriah had entered to pull a prank not even two weeks ago, and once again, it opens. Glancing both ways, she waves us toward her. One by one we sprint across the alley and into the service entrance. Tobias shuts the door gently and we all huddle together.

Tobias seems to search my face for a moment as I bite my lip and wipe my sweaty palms on my pants leg. His eyes meet mine, and I see trust and certainty in them- he doesn't even need words to tell me that he believes in me, that I can do this, that the fear will wake me up, make me braver, stronger. He nods at me, and suddenly this mission is in my hands. "Ninth floor," I whisper. "Stay quiet."

We creep up the stairs single file, quietly but swiftly. At some point, they'll see us on their monitors. They will know we are here. But it will take some time to get anyone here from Dauntless, and we can take the guards they have on site. We still have Eric to go up against, though, and he won't be an easy opponent.

Every step I climb, I grow more nervous, expecting a door to fly open and a guard to come running at us. But the guard never comes. Everyone must be at dinner. I would have expected the Erudite to be smarter than this.

At the door to the ninth floor, I turn. "Okay, this place is like a maze. It's big, and all the hallways look the same. I say we split up. Four comes with me, Zeke goes with Marlene and Edward." Marlene is the most emotional of us all right now; I want her in the largest group, with people she trusts.

I lead Four the best I can remember toward the labs Jeanine used when she held me captive. I _think_ I'm going the right way, but it's hard to tell for sure.

Somehow instinct guides me, as if my feet are acting on muscle memory. My heart races faster the closer we go, and my eyes grow wider. We reach a door, and inside I _know_ that this is where she tested the serums on me. I taste bile, but push it and the fear back down. Four and I both ready our guns before kicking it open.

My mouth drops open in surprise.

The floor is littered with a puddle of orange liquid and broken glass. A computer is pulled apart in the corner, and there is only one person here. Strapped down to the simulation chair, bruised and unconscious, is my brother. Caleb.

Tobias and I share a meaningful look as I check Caleb's pulse and breathing. Caleb's presence in this chair can only mean one thing: Uriah found a way out of this room. And we can only hope that we find him before Jeanine or Eric does.

* * *

 _ **Uriah**_

Eric grins evilly at me as he catches my arm mid-punch. There's a gun in his other hand. My left eye is still blurry from the chemicals in the beaker Caleb broke against my skull.

Losing isn't an option here, and I need to get the upper hand fast. I'm not afraid to fight dirty, so I grab one of his lip rings and pull. I pull hard. So hard, that it rips right out of his lip. Eric clutches his lip, shouting every dirty word I've ever heard and some I haven't- and I take advantage of his momentary distraction to knock the gun out of his hand; it skids across the floor, far out of my reach. It's a good thing, too, because this asshole is now so completely enraged, I'm surprised that his eyes don't glow red.

As soon as the gun flies out of Eric's hand, just as he's snapping his head in my direction, I kick him in the stomach. Eric grunts loudly but he knows how to take a hit and it doesn't slow him up much. I dodge a punch at my stomach, which turned out to be faked, and it's immediately followed by his fist colliding with my throat. I stumble backward, feeling like I am choking on air, trying to suck in a breath. I jump outside Eric's kick just in time, and taking a step toward him, land a punch to his jaw. His head snaps backward and I kick at his stomach, but Eric catches my foot and I crash to the tile floor.

Black threatens my already blurry vision right at the edges, but after a moment clears away. I roll out of the path of Eric's foot and grab his legs with my own, knocking him to the floor next to me. For a moment it's like two puppies wrestling, and it's all a blur, but soon it gets a lot _more_ blurry, because Eric is slamming my head hard into the tile floor.

I can't think, I can barely see, and my head pounds harder than it ever has before, but I can't let him beat me. It's literally do or die. For me, and Marlene probably as well. Then I remember the gun; I scramble toward it best I can with everything around me spinning, but so does Eric… and he gets there before I do.

He stands a couple yards away from me and as I watch him aim the gun at me, I try to find a way to keep fighting back, I have to keep fighting back. I can't give up now!

But then there is a loud pop, and intense pain shoots all over my upper left leg. My body had already been trying to pull me away from consciousness and the pain is too much. I hear someone yell my name, then two more gunshots, just as the black at the edges of my vision overtakes it all and I fall into nothingness.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

As Tris and Four take a left at one of the nearest hallways, Edward, Zeke and I continue straight. We slow here and there, peeking around corners. It isn't long before we come across a guard; Edward comes up behind him and puts him in a choke hold. After clawing at Edward's hands for half a minute or so, the guard collapses. I've never been able to execute that move- impressive.

It seems like we are wandering aimlessly; Tris wasn't kidding when she said it was like a maze. I think we must be near the perimeter of the building right now. Suddenly Edward grabs my arm and I stop. "Zeke!" I whisper-yell, and when he turns, Edward holds a finger to his mouth, and we all listen.

Then I hear it. Yells, growls, a truly impressive string of curse words; the sounds of fists against bones, grunts of pain. We weave through the maze of hallways using our ears as a guide, but it takes a few wrong turns to find the right place.

I freeze when I see Uriah.

He lays on his back, one eye swollen nearly shut, blood running from a gash in his head, all in all just looking bloody and broken. And a few yards away, his back to us, is Eric, with a gun pointed right at Uriah.

Zeke aims just as Eric fires. Uriah lets out a scream as blood begins to seep out of the bullet wound in his left thigh, but his voice dies out and his eyes close just as Zeke shoots Eric in the right arm, and then immediately the left leg- a wound matching the one he had just inflicted upon Uriah.

Eric almost collapses, but I suppose it's pure adrenaline that keeps him going and he turns with a roar. He dropped the gun when his arm was shot, and blood drips down his chin- it looks like Uri must have ripped out one of his piercings. Eric tries to punch with his left hand but it's honestly pretty pathetic, and Edward has no trouble grabbing Eric's arm mid-punch; he twists it behind Eric's back and I finally break free from my stupor and clamber for one of the zip ties I brought along in my pocket. As soon as I have secured the plastic around Eric's wrists I rush to Uriah; Zeke is already kneeling over him, slapping his face to try and wake him up.

I didn't know I was crying until my tears begin to splash against Uriah's skin- washed out and pale looking instead of its usual warm bronze tone. I feel for a pulse and it is still strong enough, and I put my cheek near his mouth to feel his hot breaths against it. "He'll be okay, Zeke," I reassure him, "we just need to find Tris and Four and get him back to Dauntless."

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

Tris and I stand near Caleb as his eyelids twitch slightly, as though he's about to come to. "Should we leave him here and come back for him?" Tris asks. "Or get him out of this chair, tie his hands and find the others?"

"I don't really-" I'm interrupted by the door swinging open, and in walks Jeanine. She's reading something on a tablet, and hasn't even noticed what is going on in this room as the door swings shut behind her. As she takes a few more steps toward us, Tris carefully shifts so she's behind Jeanine and a few yards away.

"Alright, let's get started, Uriah," she begins before finally looking up. Seeing Caleb in the chair and unconscious, and me standing next to him, her eyes go wide. She drops the tablet and tries to run; I lunge at her and grab hold of her arm, dragging her back toward me.

Jeanine isn't scrappy. She has no idea how to protect herself and has always had others to do it for her, in the rare case that a situation calls for it. I easily throw her to the floor and kneel on her back to hold her down. "You got a zip tie?" I ask Tris as I search my pockets for the ones I know I grabbed earlier. They must have fallen out when we jumped off the train or something.

I look up at Tris and reach my hand out as she walks toward me with one of the plastic ties, and her eyes go wide. She drops it and her hand flies to the knife that is strapped to her thigh. I turn my attention quickly back to Jeanine; though I have her pinned to the floor, her hand is free and in it, she clutches a syringe which she is about to plunge into my leg.

I close my eyes and try to move away, though it may be too late, and that's when her shriek of pain pierces the air. I look down to see Tris's knife embedded in the back of Jeanine's hand. Her fingers go slack, causing her to drop the syringe that had been in her hand. Tris lets out a deep sigh of relief as she kicks the syringe away and hands me the zip tie. I roughly hold Jeanine's hands in place and tightly zip tie them together.

"You can't just break in here," Jeanine yells angrily. "The law is on my side, and you are faction traitors. You're probably divergent as well!" I sigh and pull Caleb's socks off his feet, stuffing them in Jeanine's mouth to shut her up. Even I am not unkind enough to leave dirty socks in her mouth indefinitely, so I search the cupboards until I find some duct tape, then return to Jeanine and replace the socks with a piece of tape to keep her mouth shut.

I glance up at Caleb as he groans, then back to Tris. "Excellent speed and aim, Tris," I say with a smirk. "You must have had a really excellent instructor."

"The best," she teases, kneeling down next to me and pulling me in for a kiss.

The moment is broken by Caleb's angry screeching. "You!" he yells. "You're the one that is screwing my sister! Don't you see, Beatrice?! How old is this asshole, anyway? He's just using you!"

Tris stands and slaps him across the face before I have time to blink. "First of all, it's Tris. Second, he's eighteen. Last, he loves me and I love him, and what the hell makes you think I give a crap about your opinion, anyway?!"

"Well, I _am_ your brother, you _should_ care what I think."

Tris looks like steam should be coming out of her ears, she's so angry. "If family connections mattered, you wouldn't be trying to kill your own parents, Caleb." She looks like she's about to attack him again, and he deserves it, but I know she would feel guilty for it later. I pull her away from him, and she glares at me.

"Tris," I say, and she looks away. I hold her jaw gently between my fingers to make her look at me. "Baby, I know he deserves every single thing you want to say and do, but he isn't worth it. We know what we are to each other and we don't need his approval. Don't let him get to you. I love you."

Caleb snorts. "I can't believe you buy into his crap, Beatrice."

Tris just rolls her eyes and picks up the roll of duct tape I left on the floor. She rips off a piece and seals her brother's lips shut with it. "That's better," she says cheerfully. "Now, let's get Caleb out of that chair and go find Uriah."


	30. Chapter 29

**CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE**

 _ **Tris**_

We huddle in an empty room off the hallway where Uriah and Eric fought. Jeanine, Caleb, and Eric are all conscious now, zip tied to chairs; we can't have them escaping. Uriah lays unconscious, but still breathing, on the floor.

"He needs to get to the hospital," Marlene says firmly. She's right, he definitely does. We've managed to slow the bleeding considerably, but he can't wait all day to receive medical attention, and he can't walk. It appears that Uriah also was hit in the head several times, and he hasn't come to yet.

But I don't trust the Erudite. I shake my head. "No. He can't go to the hospital here. We can't trust the Erudite until this mess gets sorted out. We need to get him back to Dauntless. But we also need to get those three" -I point at Jeanine, Eric and Caleb- "to Candor as soon as possible, and arrest warrants for Max and the other leaders. They need to start truth serum trials as soon as possible to bring down everyone involved in this."

Edward nods. "Candor is close, easy walk, but these assholes might not be so easy. Especially Eric. I say we take the prisoners to Candor, and the girls drive Uriah back to Dauntless." I'm about to protest that there is a gaping hole in his plan- we don't have a car. But just as I open my mouth, Edward feels around Jeanine's jacket pocket and pulls out a shiny set of keys as she makes muffled noises in protest and glares. He tosses them to me. "Here you go. Take Jeanine's car, she won't be using it any more."

Edward describes the car and where I should expect to find it- it's handy having an Erudite with us- then goes to check that everything is clear. It will be harder to run with an unconscious Uriah and three prisoners, should someone find us.

While we wait, I wrap my arms around Tobias, and his automatically encircle my waist. He rests his forehead against mine, as he has so many times before. It's kind of our thing, and I love it. We have been through this too many times- separating, saying goodbye, knowing that it could be for the last time. Any number of things could go wrong for either party. But this is almost over, I remind myself. We just have to make it through a little more, and we can finally have some peace.

Tobias pulls away from me and takes my hand in his. I can feel Caleb's eyes burning into my back, but I don't turn to acknowledge his stare. I follow Tobias to a door near the back of the room and he tries the handle. It opens. "Zeke," he calls out, "knock on this door when Edward gets back." Zeke smirks and salutes with two fingers as Tobias pulls me along into the large storage room.

"Doesn't the small space bother you?" I ask once the door has closed.

He lifts one shoulder. "It's not _that_ small, and I have you here to distract me." As he speaks, he moves closer to me, backing me against the wall. His lips capture mine in a passionate kiss and my hands go to his neck, my fingers twisting and tugging at the short curls at the nape of his neck. Tobias lifts me, his hands gripping under my thighs, and presses me against the wall. As the kiss deepens, my legs wrap tightly around his waist.

Tobias shifts one hand to hold me under my butt and the other roams up and back down my side. His lips leave a trail of heat down my neck and I moan in pleasure.

Then a knock comes at the door and we both groan in frustration. He rests his head against my neck. "I love you, Tris," he says, and I'm surprised to hear his voice tight with emotion. He looks up and we stare into each other's eyes.

"I love you," I whisper back.

"Be safe. Come back to me. Promise me, one more time." I feel his heart racing under my hand that rests on his chest.

"I will," I say. "I won't leave you this time. I promise. But you'd better promise to make it back to me, too."

He nods. "We'll always find each other," he whispers.

A knock comes harder to the door and we hear Zeke's voice. "Hurry up, lovebirds, it's time to move!"

After one sweet kiss, he sets me down and we file back into the room where the others wait, Tobias's arm protectively around my waist. Caleb glares at Tobias. I nudge him with my elbow and smirk. Tobias laughs slightly. "What, are you going to give me the 'you hurt my sister and I hurt you' talk, Caleb? I think hurting Tris is your specialty, not mine, but _you_ couldn't hurt _me_ if you tried. Now let's go."

* * *

We made it out of Erudite with so little trouble that it made me nervous- as if it was _too_ easy. I don't stop to question it for long, though- Uriah has come to, sort of, but he is disoriented, pale, and in a lot of pain. We need to get him back to Dauntless quickly.

Zeke carries his brother most of the way while Marlene handles Caleb with me as back-up. When Zeke gets too tired- Uriah is not a small person by any means, and is actually taller than Zeke- Edward hauls him the rest of the way, passing custody of Jeanine off to Zeke in return. All three traitors have their hands bound and tape over their mouths to keep them quiet.

I run to the parking lot, counting on the darkness and shadows, as well as my black clothes, to conceal me. My eyes scan the lot and I see a few blue cars that look like what Edward described; I press the unlock button on the little remote attached to the keychain a few times, and one car's yellow parking lights flash twice. That's the one.

I've never driven a car before, and neither has Marlene. I'm lucky that Jeanine backed into the space- I don't have to try and reverse when I've never even driven forward. I put the key into the ignition and turn one way, then the other. It takes a couple tries to get it, but eventually the engine begins to quietly purr. Edward told me that the left pedal is the brake and the right is the gas, so I hold down the brake as I carefully pull back the shifter until the 'D' lights up, just like Edward told me.

When I tap the gas pedal for the first time, the car lurches forward and I yelp as I slam my foot down on the brake. After a deep breath to calm my nerves, I press the gas again very, very gently, and this time it smoothly begins to accelerate.

By the time I have gone around the block and reached the spot where Marlene and Uriah wait behind a dumpster, I've got the hang of it well enough that I'm confident I won't kill the three of us before we can get Uriah medical care.

Once I have helped Marlene lift Uriah onto the backseat and she has positioned herself so that his head lies in her lap, I carefully head toward Dauntless. As I drive, I gain confidence and speed up a bit.

Just at the south end of the Factionless sector, about halfway to Dauntless, there's a bump, a loud popping noise, and the car begins to thud and shudder as it moves. I ease down on the brake pedal. "What's going on?" Marlene asks frantically. I shake my head, indicating that I don't know. She kisses Uriah on the forehead and we both climb out of the car.

"I don't see anything wrong," Marlene calls to me from the passenger side. I, however, do see what is wrong. The front driver's side tire is flat as a pancake, and the rear one is gradually losing air.

"Flat tire," I call back. "Well, maybe two flat tires." I groan as I open the trunk. There is one spare. I guess we just have to figure out how to change the really bad tire and hope that the other has a slow enough leak to get us back to Dauntless.

Marlene finds a manual for the car in the glove box, and we begin to follow the instructions for changing the tire, but it's kind of confusing and neither of us have done this before. We're having trouble even figuring out how to jack the car up off the bad wheels. "Oh!" I say, pointing at the diagram. "We're missing a piece of this. I'll be right back." I walk round to the trunk again to search for the lever.

Just as I reach for it, wedged under the carpet, a hand covers my mouth and a cloth covers my eyes. I scream into the hand. _Not again,_ I think as I begin to panic. _No no no, not again, this can't be happening again._ My mind flashes back to that night at the Chasm. I smell Al's lemongrass and sage, I feel Peter's hand slide under my shirt, I hear the roar of white water rushing over rocks, and I see nothing but darkness.

I try to kick, I try to scream, I try. Tobias is nowhere near. He won't be able to save me this time. Who wants my life now? How did they find me?

I manage to kick the car hard just as I am carried away to hopefully get Marlene's attention, though I pray she isn't taken as well. However, I have a feeling that they just want me. They always want me, all of them. My promises to Tobias ring in my ears. I will play this smart, and I will make it out of here alive. I will make it back to him.

* * *

 _ **Marlene**_

I hear a thump against the car and I don't think too much of it since Tris is back there looking through the trunk, but it does put me a bit more on alert. Then I hear shuffling feet, a muffled sound like someone screaming through their teeth, and I stand. "Tris?" I call, but I don't see her anywhere.

Then I see it. A shadow disappearing around a corner. I run to the alleyway the figure disappeared into and catch a glimpse of Tris, blindfolded and struggling as she is carried away by four factionless men. My breathing quickens and I look back and forth between the place Tris and the men were just a moment ago, and the car that contains my seriously injured boyfriend. My hands go to my head, and I press the palms firmly against my skull as if holding it together, because I feel like that's exactly what I am doing.

I can't just let them take Tris- who knows what they'll do to her! But I can't leave Uriah, either. He could die, and soon. But then, I don't even know how I'm going to get Uriah back to Dauntless.

A sob escapes my throat. I don't know what to do.

If I chase after them, am I already too late? And if I catch up… do I have even the slightest chance against four men? Some could be former Dauntless, and who knows what the factionless's resources are, or what motivation they have for taking her.

If I get back to the car, I can figure out how to change that shredded tire and rush Uri back to Dauntless. Then I can get help to come back and find Tris. I feel awful leaving her, but I don't see any choice.

I turn quickly at an unfamiliar grinding sound and see the car jerking oddly, kind of gradually tilting. I run back, glancing at Uriah through the window- he looks okay, and his chest still rises and falls- before running back to the driver's side.

I'm shocked at what I see. A large factionless man about my age is jacking the car up to change the tire. He looks familiar, but it takes me a moment to place him. "Hand me that wrench, will ya?" he says, and his voice is soft and kind. I keep studying him, but I just can't figure out how I know him.

"Do I know you?" I finally blurt out.

"Not really," he says as he unscrews the last nut off the wheel. "I don't think we ever spoke to one another, anyway. I'm Al, I was cut from initiation at the end of stage one, along with Myra." He pulls off the wheel and I roll the spare to him.

As he begins to secure the spare tire, I ask, "Why are you helping me?"

He's silent for a moment, then glances at me before answering. "Well, because you need help. I know the guy in the car is friends with Tris, and he doesn't look like he can wait much longer to see a doctor." He checks the tightness of the nuts and stands, checking the other tire as he speaks. He must deem it driveable, because he doesn't say otherwise. "And because if we get you back to Dauntless, we can find Four and some other people to help Tris. I can't go up against them by myself."

I nod and sigh in relief. We quickly decide that he should drive since he actually knows how. Once we're in the car, I check Uriah's leg, which is soaked in more blood than before. He's groaning, though, so I know he's breathing, and somewhat conscious. After a couple of minutes, Al tells me, "I didn't want to say this out in the open and put her in any danger, but Myra is following them to see where they took Tris."

I nod, relieved that we will have a way to locate her. Al agrees to help me get Uriah into the infirmary and wait while we find help. We hope the car will still be in condition to drive back to Candor to find Four; if not, we'll have to take the train.

As we pull up to the Dauntless compound and Al comes around to my door to pick up Uriah, I take a deep breath. We got Uriah here, in minutes he'll be with doctors, and he still seems stable, but we can't relax until we've found Tris.

* * *

Al jogs next to me through the Pit with Uriah in his arms. Luckily, his shirt is Dauntless black and his pants are a dark blue, so most people don't notice that he's factionless, but those that do stare- he's really not supposed to be here, but i don't care. I can't carry Uriah on my own.

Lynn quickly spots us and runs to catch up. "Where the hell have you been? What happened to him?!" she yells, her eyes wide and panicked. Lynn, Uriah and I have been best friends since lower levels, and I feel guilty for not including her in this, but Four insisted we keep it to as few people as possible.

"Long story," I say through slightly labored breaths. "Get Shauna, Christina and Will. Meet me at the infirmary." Lynn nods and speeds off the other direction without questioning me further.

Al pushes the infirmary door open with his shoulder and rushes in with me trailing behind. The purple-haired receptionist at the front desk gasps and rushes away for a stretcher, bringing doctors with her. As one doctor and a nurse push the stretcher down the hall, I can no longer hold back my sobs- this has all been too much. The doctor that stayed behind begins to ask Al questions but he doesn't have answers. He bends down to my level with his hands on my shoulders, softly and soothingly saying my name, reminding me to breathe, and as I calm down slightly, he says, "Marlene, I know this has been a really hard day. But we got him here, okay? The doctor just needs to know what happened. Can you help Uriah by answering some questions?" I realize he's talking to me like I'm a five year old, but it seems that's just what I need right now.

I begin to explain what happened, how long ago, everything the doctor asks as Lynn and Shauna stumble into the waiting room followed by Christina and Will. I feel on the verge of another sobbing fit, but I need to hold it together a little longer. I fill them in on the part the doctor didn't need to know- Uriah's divergence, why Jeanine wanted him- and that Zeke, Four and Edward are at Candor turning in the culprits.

Then I meet Christina's eyes as I tell the last part- the part I need her help with. "We got a flat tire on the way back here. We were trying to figure out how to change it, but neither of us had driven a car before today, let alone change a tire. Tris went to get something else out of the trunk and I heard a noise, so I looked up, and she was gone. I- I followed where I saw someone, and down the alley, there were four factionless men carrying Tris away, blindfolded! I wanted to- I couldn't- Uriah would've died! And I can't go up against four men!" Tears begin to stream down my face again and Shauna pulls me against her chest.

Al takes over for me, explaining how he got involved and what our plan is from here. Christina and Will look confused when we mention needing to get Four from Candor, but let it go, probably assuming it's just because he's responsible for her as her instructor and he's good in a fight. I decide to wait here with Uriah. Shauna runs to find a friend who works as a Dauntless mechanic, and he quickly changes the tire with the slow-leak while Lynn manages to round up some weapons. Soon they have all rushed out to Jeanine Matthews' car on the road to Candor, and I am left alone, silently praying that Uriah comes through all this okay… and that he still has his good friend left alive when he does.


	31. Chapter 30

__**CHAPTER THIRTY**

 _ **Tobias**_

Caleb has been glaring at me all night, but now, sitting in a corner of his jail cell at Candor, hugging his knees to his chest, he just looks defeated. His eyes aren't narrowed now; he's just studying me, though I have no idea what conclusions he has come to. A part of me hates him for what Tris told me he did to her, but _this_ Caleb hasn't done all of that, and I know Tris still loves him. She would want me to show him at least _some_ kindness, so I will.

"I sent word to your parents," I say, breaking the heavy silence. "I'd expect that at least your mother will be here soon. Your dad might be too busy with council business to come right away, given the circumstances."

Caleb shakes his head. "They won't come. They didn't even come to Visiting Day."

I snort. "I guess Jeanine didn't tell you that she banned Abnegation members from entering the Erudite compound." He looks at me in surprise. "Yeah, your mom visited Tris, so I'm sure she would have come to see you if she had the chance. Tris even said that your mom asked her to go see you when she could, since she wasn't able to."

Caleb shakes his head. "I didn't know. I thought they didn't care about me any more."

After another minute of silence, I sigh. "If there's anything you want to say to me without your mother here, now is the time. With the way you glared at me all night, it seemed like you had something on your mind."

He bites his lip. "I'm behind bars and I know I won't get out of this situation, so there's really no point in me making threats. I just don't want her getting hurt. You're older, you're Dauntless… it's different in Abnegation, you know. She's not used to… how things are there."

I laugh. "I'm not Dauntless born, Caleb. I'm not used to that either. She assumed I was experienced at first too, I guess, but I'm not, and I'd never push her into anything she wasn't ready for." He doesn't need to know how much she has been ready for, though.

Caleb's mouth drops open in shock. "Where are you from then?"

"Doesn't matter. I'm Dauntless now." People ask me my real name frequently and I have never caved in… but this is Tris's brother, and the point of this conversation is to be on good terms with him for Tris's sake, so when he gives me that irritated look… I actually answer. Maybe it's time I stop guarding that secret so fiercely, anyway. "Fine. I was from Abnegation. My name is Tobias."

I can see Caleb working it out in his head, Erudite mind at work, and before he can shout it out, I interrupt him. "I know you know who I am now, Caleb. I left for a reason, and I'd rather leave that behind. Like I said, I am Dauntless now, and my name is Four, but I didn't show up there any more comfortable with physical affection than your sister."

Caleb nods. "Well, there's nothing I can do about you two together, anyway, and I'm sure she'll never speak to me again, so just… take good care of her, okay?"

"Tris can hold her own, but I'll always look out for her. And she doesn't hate you. She'll be mad for a while, but she could never hate you."

Before we can say anything else, Natalie's voice is ringing out down the hall, bringing Caleb immediately to his feet. "Four," Natalie says as Caleb crosses his cell floor and grips the bars with both hands. "Thank you so much for sending word, dear. Where is Tris?" She reaches out and takes my hand for a moment- the most affection she can really show, as an Abnegation, and even this is questionable.

"Uriah was seriously injured," I explain, "so she and Marlene- Uriah's girlfriend- took him back to Dauntless. We didn't want to trust the Erudite hospital right now, not with him. I think he'll survive, they should have been able to get him there in time."

She nods, satisfied with my reply, and turns to Caleb. "Your father is with Jack Kang and Marcus Eaton right now, organizing additional arrests that must be made, and the trials. Are you alright, Caleb? Are you hurt?" She reaches out through the bars and gently places her palm against the swollen bruise on his left temple, and she frowns at the cuts on his lip and cheek.

"I'll live," he answers, looking down, unwilling to meet her eyes. "I deserve much worse." _I'll drink to that,_ I think.

"Tell me," Natalie says. Two simple words, but they convey it all. She is asking for his full confession of everything he did and planned to do, an explanation for how he could make these choices. I back away and lean against the wall, but I don't leave. I'm sure this is where Tris will go when she arrives. As angry as she is at her brother, she loves him, that much is sure- even after he betrayed her far worse than this, she literally died for him. I can't help the resentment that boils up when I look at this coward, knowing that she chose _him_ over me, over us. I'm not angry with her any more- I know she thought she would survive, and I know she is sorry. But I wish I didn't have to worry that she might make a choice like that again. She promised… but from all I've heard, her promise might not mean much when the moment comes that she must choose between herself and another.

Caleb hangs his head. "Jeanine wanted me to be an important part of her… project. I agreed to have a tracker implanted in me to lead them to you, and any other refugees. I'm so sorry, Mom," he sobs. "She convinced me that the government was unfair, and I still think maybe it is. And she made divergents sound like monsters- she said they want to destroy the faction system. I don't know what to believe any more. Though I know Uriah is certainly smarter than he looks. He certainly knew how to read me, what to say to make me lose control." I chuckle slightly at that.

"Jeanine doesn't understand how divergents minds work," Natalie says in a gentle, soothing tone. You would never guess, looking at and hearing her right now, that her son just admitted that he was going to help with the murder of her and her husband, and all their neighbors. "She is afraid of what she doesn't understand."

"Why are you here, Mom?" Caleb tearfully asks.

Natalie sighs. "I love you, Caleb. I always will, nothing can change that. I love you no matter what faction you choose, no matter what horrible things you have done. I don't condone or accept your choices, but I could _never_ stop loving you."

The very next moment, we are both distracted by the slapping of boots against tile as Zeke appears, running toward me down the hall. "Four, we need you, NOW."

* * *

Zeke wouldn't tell me anything during our rush down the halls. He leads me to the elevators and punches the button for the eighteenth floor.

"Zeke, just tell me! What's going on? Where is Tris?" He gives me a somber look, then stares straight forward again, and my stomach drops. This- whatever it is that went wrong- this can't be happening. We were about to put all this behind us- we were a day away from living normal, quiet lives. I swallow hard as the elevator doors open. "Please tell me she's alive."

"I hope so. Come on."

It's hard to take in a full breath and there is a dull ache in my chest as Zeke leads me down a black marble hallway on the eighteenth floor, then we turn and go down another hallway that looks exactly the same. Through the double doors, we enter a room that also has marble floors, but here the floors are white. The room is filled with benches, tiered in a semi-circle, and instead of windows there are openings in the walls with no barrier from the elements. This is the room where trials are conducted with peace serum, but there are no candor here now, in the middle of the night.

A group of mine and Tris's friends speak to each other in hushed voices, then all go silent when they notice Zeke and me approaching. I'm startled when I realize that Al is among them, and though I feel the blood drain from my face and my body begins to feel numb, my conscious mind can't process what it means for Al to be here. Deep inside somewhere I know, but it is someplace that I can't access right now.

Marlene isn't here either.

"What happened?" I demand. "Where are Tris and Marlene? Uriah?" I knew Uriah wouldn't be here- he won't be leaving that infirmary anytime soon, assuming he even made it there. Everyone stares at me for a moment, then jumps as I roar, "Answer me, damn it!" My breathing quickens and I run my hands through my hair.

Everyone looks to Al. He gulps, then shakily begins to speak. "They got a flat tire in the factionless sector," he explains. "I saw some of Evelyn's men put out something in the street just before the car came. Some sort of spikes? She and Marlene were trying to figure out how to change the tire and they- they took her, they took Tris. Four men." I begin pacing, my head in my hands. "I got Uriah and Marlene back to Dauntless, regrouped, and we all came here."

"Do you know where they took her?" I demand. "Or why? What Evelyn wants?"

"Myra was following them, she will know where they are, if we can find her." I nod- that's at least a bit of a relief, we may not have to search the entire factionless sector- that would be impossible. I look at him expectantly. Al frowns. "Four, I think you know why she took her."

I drop to the ground and rest my head in my hands, with my elbows propped on my knees. "What do I do? I can't- but I can't let her have Tris- damn it!"

"Fill us in on what it is that Evelyn wants, and who the hell Evelyn is," Christina demands, as loud and obnoxious as ever. But if these people- my friends, Zeke, Shauna, Lynn- and Tris's friends as well, Christina, Will and Edward- are going to help get Tris back without sacrificing Dauntless, they deserve the truth.

I don't look up, I don't want to see their reactions. "Evelyn Johnson- formerly Eaton- is the leader of the Factionless," I tell them. "She's also my mother. She faked her death and abandoned me to my father, who is not a good man, when I was nine years old. I believed she was dead until she contacted me two years ago." Shauna moves to the floor and sits next to me, only a couple of inches space between us, and places a hand on my shoulder. Surprisingly, the gesture gives me strength. I look up to see a mixture of reactions- shock, anger… only Christina gives me the kicked puppy look. "Don't look at me like that, Christina," I spit. "I don't want your pity." She looks down.

"What does she want, and what does Tris have to do with it?" Zeke prompts me.

"What she wants," I explain, "is power. She wants to abolish the faction system and make herself a dictator, basically. She wants weapons, but she needs information about Dauntless security, and I happen to be one of the people who could give her that." I take a deep breath, because I know Christina is probably going to flip out. "The reason she took _Tris_ , is because I'm in love with her. She's my weakness. I don't know how she found out about me and Tris, but just a couple days ago I lied to her about whether I had a girlfriend, and I don't think my attempt to protect Tris from her is going to help anything now."

Christina and Will stare at me with their mouths hanging open, then Christina starts her freak-out. "Wait, wait, back up. WHAT?! You and Tris?! Since when? Why didn't she tell me?"

"Uh… yes, me and Tris. The night before Visiting Day… and she didn't tell you because I'm her instructor and we weren't supposed to be together. She didn't want anyone to think her rank was because of favoritism- and it's not, it's all her."

Outside of Christina's babbling about how she can't believe Tris didn't tell her, no one says anything for a minute, and I feel like I'm going to lose my mind. Tris is out there held hostage by my cold, power hungry mother, everyone is just sitting here thinking over my shitty luck in parents, and Christina just won't shut up.

Lynn finally interrupts her. "Okay, okay, we get it, Christina. _Anyway..._ Four, it took you two years as Dauntless's Most Eligible Bachelor to finally ask a girl out, so we'd better not let her go. Let's go show that bitch what happens when you mess with Dauntless."

* * *

Getting our search party into the factionless sector is tricky, because I want Evelyn to think I have come alone. Al can easily move around undetected as he actually is factionless, but Evelyn has eyes everywhere, and the others would not go unnoticed for long. We choose an abandoned building just at the edge of the factionless sector and I travel to the safe house my mother is usually at- where I know she will expect me to look for her- alone. Al will try to find some clothes to make the others blend in with the factionless, but he also much search for Myra.

When I reach the side door of the safe house, I knock four times, then twice, just as I did last time. A woman I recognize as Therese, one of my mother's top people, opens the door and smirks. I don't wait for her to speak as I push past her and walk purposefully down the hall to my mother's office with my fists clenched at my sides.

I barge through the door to her office without any warning, my jaw clenched. Evelyn looks up and says in a nauseatingly sweet voice, "Son, what a pleasant surprise. What brings you back so soon? I thought you didn't want a thing to do with me."

"You know why I'm here," I say through gritted teeth. "Let her go! Leave her out of this."

Evelyn laughs lightly. "It's very interesting that just two days ago, you didn't have a girlfriend, yet today, this scrawny little spitfire my men… helped away from a stranded vehicle… seems to be very important to you. And I never would have thought my big, scary Dauntless son would look twice at little Beatrice Prior."

I'm seeing red. She's as bad as Jeanine Matthews. "If you love me at all," I say quietly, "If you _ever_ loved me… you'll let her go and let me finally have a normal life for _once._ Just let her go… just let us be." I know it won't work, but I have to try. She is my mother- can she really be this cruel to her own son? Though I suppose I know the answer to that- she did leave me with that monster, after all.

"Oh, Tobias. I truly wish that you would have cooperated more willingly- I dreamed of you by my side governing this city. I'm sorry it had to come to this." She stands and leans toward me, her arms straight, her palms flat against the old desk. "I will be happy to let Beatrice go free as soon as you provide us the security codes and schedules we need to get into the Dauntless weapons storage. We will, of course, need to verify that the information is accurate before releasing her. You have not proven yourself honest in recent meetings."

I sigh. I expected it to go this way, but I had hoped it wouldn't. One more try… "Evelyn… you understand that you lose me as a son forever if you make me choose between my faction and Tris?"

Evelyn huffs. "She's a silly infatuation, Tobias. I am your mother. I am confident that eventually, you will see that what I want is best for everyone." In that moment I hate her. I hate her even more than Marcus, if that's possible. Marcus doesn't love me, Evelyn doesn't either, and now she is holding the _one_ person who ever truly made me feel like I mattered.

"Fine," I spit. "Give me a pen and paper."


	32. Chapter 31

_**A/N: This chapter skips back in time a bit- and then forward again to where the previous chapter left off. I just want to make that clear in case the way I notated that in the chapter is at all confusing to anyone- I had a little trouble figuring out how to do that very gracefully. On another note, we're getting pretty close to the end! Just a few chapters left! So I just want to say thanks, once again, to those who have reviewed and encouraged me throughout this story- it means so much to me! xoxo**_

* * *

 **CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE**

 _ **Tris -**_ _picks up where last Tris POV left off in Chapter 28:_

 _Just as I reach for the lever, wedged under the carpet, a hand covers my mouth and a cloth covers my eyes. I scream into the hand. Not again, I think as I begin to panic. No no no, not again, this can't be happening again. My mind flashes back to that night at the Chasm. I smell Al's lemongrass and sage, I feel Peter's hand slide under my shirt, I hear the roar of white water rushing over rocks, and I see nothing but darkness._

 _I try to kick, I try to scream, I try. Tobias is nowhere near. He won't be able to save me this time. Who wants my life now? How did they find me?_

 _I manage to kick the car hard just as I am carried away to hopefully get Marlene's attention, though I pray she isn't taken as well. However, I have a feeling that they just want me. They always want me, all of them. My promises to Tobias ring in my ears. I will play this smart, and I will make it out of here alive. I will make it back to him._

Someone shifts their grip, and my legs are no longer restrained. I can't see, so I can only hope to actually hit someone when I kick- and I succeed, based on the satisfying "Oof!" a deep voice grunts out. However, I'm still no closer to getting away. I'm stunned by a hard slap to my face. "If I had known someone this small could be such a little hellion, I would have made you carry her, Charlie," a voice near my head says.

Someone else laughs. "We'll be there soon enough." I don't give up, I keep trying anything I can to get out of their grip, to run, to hide, to get back to Candor and find Tobias... but it's useless. Soon the journey ends, and my hands are tied together with rope. Something pulls my hands upward until I am stretched so I am standing with my whole body, fingertips to feet, in a straight line perpendicular to the ground. My heels don't even touch the floor, though I can put a little weight on the balls of my feet.

Once they are satisfied that I am secure, the blindfold is removed, and then the tape is ripped from my mouth; it stings, and I scream through my teeth, squeezing my eyes shut tightly. When I open them I first glance upward to see that the rope tying my hands goes straight up to the ceiling, which several stories high, to a pulley- I can see which direction the rope leads from there, but not where it ends.

Now aware of what is holding me in this position, I look around me. I am in some sort of factory- one where they do something with metal, making machines, perhaps. There is scrap metal everywhere, there are big machines with conveyor belts, and across the giant room a big vat that glows something reddish-orange. It boils and steams and sizzles.

And in front of me is a woman I would have prefered never to see again: Tobias's mother, Evelyn Johnson. I narrow my eyes and scowl at her. She just chuckles. I suppose I'm not very intimidating on a normal day, and even less tied up this way.

I haven't met Evelyn, this time around, so I'll have to pretend not to know her. "Who are you and what do you want with me?" I spit.

"I am the leader of the Factionless," Evelyn informs me, "and you are simply a bargaining chip. I need information, and I will not let you go until I get it." I just glare at her and she pauses, glaring back. "I saw what you did with my son in that movie theater. You certainly aren't the good little Abnegation girl I remember, _Beatrice._ " I gasp. I _knew_ I heard someone in that cinema! Evelyn was watching us… fool around? What a sick freak! _Oh, right,_ I recall. _I should be reacting to the fact that I went to this woman's funeral nine years ago, and now she's standing here in front of me._

"You look good, Evelyn," I say flatly, "for someone who has been dead for nine years. Does Tobias know you're alive?" If she saw us in the cinema, I'm sure she heard me call him Tobias, but it's probably best to make her think he wouldn't care enough about me yet to give her what she wants, and I need to do whatever will help me keep my promise to Tobias and come back to him alive.

"What makes you really so sure that he even cares enough about me to put me above whatever is keeping him from giving you this information?" I ask. "We've only been dating a few weeks, you know."

Evelyn is pacing back and forth, standing tall, almost regal looking, with her hands folded together behind her back. I swear there's an evil glint in her eye. "I have my ways, and I am quite sure that Tobias cares enough for you that he will do what I ask of him. I will do what I must in order to accomplish my goal."

I can't believe Evelyn is doing this to him. For once in his life, he has found some happiness- and she's threatening it for her own selfish gain. Her own son! I shouldn't be surprised. I feel the blood rush to my head as my face gets hot, and I stand on the tips of my toes to lessen the pull on my arms. I'm sure it's unwise to express my thoughts, but I am too angry to hold back.

"So you don't care about Tobias at all? What kind of mother are you? I already knew you didn't deserve that title after leaving him with that _monster._ Did you even bother to check in on him and see if he was okay?! And now that he has someone that cares for him- me- you're threatening that as well! He'll never forgive you for this, Evelyn!"

Evelyn grimaces at me as she takes a few steps forward. We are less than a foot apart now, though even with me standing on my toes, we are not quite eye level. "Oh, you naive child," Evelyn hisses. "I am his mother; you are simply a silly teenage infatuation. He will forgive me, and he will forget all about _you._ _You_ are temporary, and _I_ am permanent." Without waiting for a response, she turns and stalks out of view, and I am left alone, other than a factionless guard sitting across the room whittling a piece of wood. I suppose that you learn to do things like whittle wood when you're sitting around all the time with nothing to do.

It isn't the first time she has told me that- that she is permanent and I am temporary. And how can I be sure that she's wrong? The fact is… this Tobias has known me just a few weeks. Nothing is as certain with us as it was before, when we had been through so much together. All I can do now is hold up my end of my promise, do the thing I came back here to do, and that is to choose life- because choosing to live is choosing Tobias.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_ _- in meeting with Evelyn, resumes where Chapter 30 ends_

 _I sigh. I expected it to go this way, but I had hoped it wouldn't. One more try… "Evelyn… you understand that you lose me as a son forever if you make me choose between my faction and Tris?"_

 _Evelyn huffs. "She's a silly infatuation, Tobias. I am your mother. I am confident that eventually, you will see that what I want is best for everyone." In that moment I hate her. I hate her even more than Marcus, if that's possible. Marcus doesn't love me, Evelyn doesn't either, and now she is holding the one person who ever truly made me feel like I mattered._

" _Fine," I spit. "Give me a pen and paper."_

Evelyn's eyes glint and the corners of her lips turn up slightly as she hands me a scrap of scratch paper and old ball-point pen. I stare at the paper for a moment before I begin writing. I can't betray Dauntless this way. I have to come up with something else. I have to help Tris another way. But I also need to leave this option open for later, in case all else fails, because I _have to_ help Tris. I need her like I need air to breathe.

Finally, I begin writing. I hand the paper to Evelyn, and she frowns as she reads it. "This is only part of the information I asked for," she says, an edge of anger in her voice, her eyes cold.

"That's right," I reply. "I need Tris back, safe and with me, before I give you the rest." It's not enough information for her to do anything with- just a _part_ of the shift schedules for the weapons storage- just the daytime schedule. "Think of it as a show of good faith. Right now, I have no way of knowing if Tris is even safe and well." Evelyn just scowls as she tries to decide what her next move is.

I toss the pen on the desk and check my watch. It is about seven in the morning. I haven't slept at all, just running on adrenaline. "I will meet you back here in… eight hours," I inform her. "Three this afternoon. Give us each a little time to think about the other's offer." Her jaw literally drops- she clearly did not expect me to stand up to her ultimatum. I leave her office without glancing back.

* * *

When I return to the abandoned building the others are waiting in, all of them are asleep except Lynn, and Al has not yet returned. I quietly update Lynn on the meeting.

"It's now almost eight," Lynn says. "Al isn't back, and we don't know where Tris is yet. What if we can't find her in time?"

"I guess I'll have to give her fake information and warn Dauntless, then," I reply, "but if I do, we will need to find Tris fast, because Evelyn will be very, very angry when she finds out."

A few minutes pass in comfortable silence before Lynn and I begin waking everyone up. As everyone rubs sleep from their eyes, I hear heavy footsteps on the stairs. Lynn goes to check it out. "It's Al!" I hear her call.

Soon we are all gathered around a mixed pile of clothes from all different factions, picking through to form disguises. Once we sit down, all eyes turn to Al.

"I found Myra," he says, and a wave of relief washes through me. "She knows where they're holding Tris. Myra is staying in the area to keep watch in case they move her. Tris is in a working factory- one that Evelyn runs- in the southwest part of the Factionless sector. I can lead us there once we have a plan." I definitely have to find a way to help Al and Myra out of this crappy life- they've done so much to help Tris, and once Evelyn finds out they have gone against her, they won't be safe here. They will need to get away from the Factionless.

"Hopefully Myra will have some idea what we're up against, since she has been watching their movements," I start. "I think it's best if one or two of us come in after the first few, with the mission of helping Tris. The rest, fight off any factionless who are trying to keep us from Tris."

We spend about half an hour refining the details of our plan. The first few to go in will be Lynn, Zeke and Edward. Christina and I are to focus on Tris, and the rest- Al, Will, and Shauna- will follow us in and join the first three in holding back Evelyn's people.

By nine-thirty, we are all disguised as factionless, our guns hidden within our clothing, and beginning our trek across the factionless sector. _Hold on, Tris,_ I think. _I'm coming. We won't let you down._

* * *

 _ **Tris**_

There are people working the machines around the factory, none of them paying me the slightest bit of attention. When Evelyn left, she had three guards keeping an eye on me, but a while ago, two of them left, telling the third to keep watch. He agreed… and maybe fifteen minutes later, fell asleep.

So here, I am, tied up, no one really watching me. All I need is a way to cut this rope.

A couple of yards behind me is a sturdy looking table. I turn, slightly twisting the rope, and push off the floor with my feet. My shoulders practically scream in pain as my full weight is supported only from above, but I lift my feet as high as I can and successfully plant them on the table. I stand, finally giving myself enough slack in the rope that I can relax my stiff arms.

From this angle, I see something I couldn't before. A pillar a few yards away, on the side completely opposite where I was first standing, has metal brackets sticking out of it every foot or so- like a ladder. At the top of the pillar is a metal catwalk, which winds throughout the factory a couple of stories up. If I can just get myself to that pillar, I can climb the ladder to the catwalk, and maybe I'll find something to wear through this rope.

I take a deep breath, bracing for the pain I know I will feel again in my shoulders, and get a running start on the table top, swinging hard in the direction of the concrete pillar. I can't separate my hands, but I stretch out my legs, hooking the right around the pillar and using it to pull myself flush against it. My joined hands scramble for a metal rung, and make contact.

After twisting myself around the pillar, I begin to climb. It's slower than when i climbed the ferris wheel during capture the flag, with my hands bound as they are, but at least I am not stuck in that spot completely helpless.

I am about twenty feet off the ground when I hear an angry scream and a commotion. Evelyn has returned, and she is screaming at the guard, who is no longer asleep. I climb faster as the guard rushes off into the factory and Evelyn glares up at me. I keep climbing; why is she just watching?

I am almost to the top when I begin to notice something, and glance up at the pulley to confirm. _Are you kidding me?!_ Someone is pulling in the slack on the rope, and when that slack runs out, they'll pull me right off the catwalk with it. I still have hope that I will be able to get free, I just need to break the ties before they are able to pull the rope tightly enough to pull me.

As I reach the place it connects to the catwalk, I find that the triangle-shaped piece of metal that connects the pillar to the metal pathway above is thin enough, sharp enough, for my purposes. I balance with one foot on a ladder rung, the other leg wrapped around the pillar to make sure I don't fall. I rub the rope that binds my hands back and forth, as fast as I can, over the sharpest part of the support, and it begins to fray. The slack in the rope shrinks and shrinks and I work even faster- soon the rope will be taut again and I will be pulled along with it.

Just when the slack completely disappears and I begin to feel a slight pull on my wrists, the rope snaps and I wrap my arms around the pillar. I look around and see guards on the ground level looking up at me- I can't go down. That only leaves up- the catwalk.

My arms and shoulders are so sore, it takes every bit of determination I have to push through the pain and pull myself over the edge of the catwalk. I sit for a moment, panting and heaving, then look up. Navigating the cat walks across the room, nearer the other ladder, is Evelyn. _Shit._

It is so hot in here… and suddenly there is a lot more noise. Evelyn has paused and is looking down, so I glance downward too. My mouth drops open when I see first, that a fire has caught near the bottom of the very pillar I just climbed; second, a handful of people who appear factionless at first glance are fighting the guards. But then I see- it's my friends. I have to get to that ladder. I look around to locate it again- and see Tobias beginning to climb it. Good, he spotted me.

As I begin toward Evelyn- and Tobias- I feel the catwalk beginning to sway. The fire, it has to be the fire, and I have to get away from it- this pillar soon won't hold the weight. The fire is quickly spreading, and it could affect the integrity of this entire catwalk- we have to get down from here. I have to get to Tobias.

When I reach Evelyn, she pushes me. I grab her wrists- I don't want to push her off and kill her. I just want to make her let me by, I want to leave, I want to be safe and I want Tobias to be safe. But it isn't that easy, and we struggle. Parts of the catwalk have begun to fall. Tobias is at the top of the ladder, coming toward us, when Evelyn loses her balance, and pulls me with her before she lets go of me.

We both grab the edge of the catwalk with both hands. I glance down and my eyes widen.

We are hanging over a big vat of something very hot, glowing red-orange, bubbling. My mind searches for the word and eventually comes up with _lava_ , like I've read about before, like volcanoes have inside of them. I suppose it is used to melt metal- this is a factory, after all.

* * *

 _ **Tobias**_

"Tobias!" my mother screams, and that's when Tris turns her head and makes eye contact with me. One by one supports for the walkway are crumbling as the fire spreads, and soon, the metal path that my mother and girlfriend are barely keeping hold of as they hang above the vat of bubbling, melted rock will give way as well. I can't believe I'm up here, the height is dizzying. I love Tris too much to watch her fall to her death- enough to overcome my fear.

As I rush toward them, I look back and forth between Tris's eyes and Evelyn's. This will fall, we don't even have a full minute by estimation. By the time I pull one of them up and move to safety, I won't be able to go back for the other, not unless I want to die as well.

Evelyn and Tris both hold on with just their fingertips, and Tris's face twists in pain. She looks so tired… she won't be able to hold on much longer.

"Help me, Tobias!" Evelyn cries. "Please! I am your mother! Don't let me die!"

I look from Evelyn to Tris. With tears in her eyes, her voice expressing such a self-sacrificing love, she calls out to me, "It's okay, Tobias. I love you. It's okay." She loves me so much that she is giving me permission to save my mother, sacrificing a future with me, sacrificing her life. And I know I would do the same for her. My choice is made.

An instant later, my calloused hands grip her smooth wrists. I pull her swiftly up, she is light as a feather. With Tris in my arms, bridal style, I make a run for it as the catwalk sways and shudders. Glancing back, I see Evelyn hanging by one hand- really just three fingers, and the catwalk begins to fall. She loses her grip entirely and lets out a scream as her body disappears in the molten lava.

I force myself to keep my eyes forward and just keeps running. The bottom of the ladder is surrounded by flames. I glance around, panicked. Then Tris shouts, "There!" She is pointing to a concrete pillar like many of those that have now crumbled in the fire, in a corner that it looks like we can get to, and for now, it looks sound- the fire has not yet reached that corner. I set her on her feet and we both run as fast as we safely can. She lets me go down first, and I am relieved- that height is terrifying even if the ground weren't about to fall down around me- and follows me down to ground level.


	33. Chapter 32

_**A/N: This chapter also has an M-rated version. If you'd like to read it, you can find a separate story through my author's page that has all the M-rated scenes, including the full version of this chapter.**_

 _ **Also- this is the last chapter! I do plan to write an epilogue sometime this week, but this is the end of the actual story. Thank you so much for reading, and for your reviews, they mean so much to me! I'll say this again when I post the epilogue, but I have some other things in the works, so be on the lookout for the two stories that will be published soon- one I've been working on for a little while, and another that is a collaborative effort between me and FourTrisHEA, which we are really excited about as well. Oh, and you should definitely go check out her stories, if you haven't yet!**_

 _ **Chapter Disclaimer: This chapter contains implied adult-intimate situations and references to sex. If you are uncomfortable with this, please do not continue to read.**_

 **CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO**

 _ **Tobias**_

We run. Tris stumbles and I decide we have gone far enough- we will wait here to regroup with the others. I hope they all make it out of that building.

I pull her into my arms, gasping for breath and coughing, my chin resting on the top of her head. After a moment I pull away, checking her all over- somehow I just have to see for myself, reassure myself, that she's alright, and she is. "Did they hurt you?" I ask frantically.

Tris shakes her head. "Not really. My arms were tied above my head for a long time, so my shoulders are sore. But I'm okay." I see a few figures coming towards us- Zeke, Shauna and Edward. "I'm so sorry about your mom, Tobias," Tris says with tears in her eyes. I don't know how she can be so compassionate to the woman who just kidnapped her.

"I'd choose you everytime, Tris," I say, crushing her lips to mine.

"I will choose you every time, too, Tobias," she whispers, just as more of our friends reach the group, coughing and panting.

"Is anyone missing?" Zeke asks, looking around.

Will looks frantic. "Where is Christina?" Down a few blocks I can see the factory completely up in flames.

Lynn shakes her head. "I saw her go down, Will. I think she was dead before the fire could even get to her. I'm sorry." Next to me, Tris stifles a sob. Will's hands are in his hair and he looks around like his eyes won't focus- probably much how I looked when I found out Tris was missing.

"She could still be alive," he says desperately. "I need to go look for her." Zeke catches his arm just in time, and Tris approaches and wraps her arms around him.

"It's too late, Will," she says. "If I thought there was any chance we might find her alive in there… I'd want nothing more than to run in there and find her, too. But it would be a suicide mission to retrieve a dead body, Will. You wouldn't make it out of there alive. We need to choose life- we need to choose the people that are still here," she says, locking eyes with me. And I get it. She is giving me what she didn't the first time around- she is choosing life, and by choosing life, she is choosing _me._ The building is beginning to cave in. Will sits on the curb, head in his hands, and Al drops down next to him- just to _be_ there. It's the best thing anyone can do.

We sit in stunned silence, until someone suggests we get ourselves to the Dauntless infirmary.

 _ **Uriah**_

I am surrounded in darkness, just like I was for so long before Tris and I died and came back. Am I dying again? Did I come back, only to not even make it through initiation this time? Did I at least save Marlene, Lynn, Tris?

I hear a faint, steady beeping sound, and it gradually gets louder and clearer. I force my eyelids open, but the light is too bright. Finally I realize that a hand is holding mine, so I squeeze it. It takes a few tries to get a response, but when I finally do, I hear a gasp, followed by Marlene's sweet, musical voice. "Uriah? Are you awake, baby?"

"Mmhh," I groan. "Turn the lights off please, my head hurts and it's too bright."

Marlene laughs and removes her hand from mine. A moment later, she says, "it's safe to open your eyes now, Uri, I turned off the lights."

And when I open my eyes, the first thing I see is the beautiful girl that I love so much. "I missed you, Marlene," I tell her, reaching my hand up to touch her cheek, and she leans in and kisses me tenderly. "What happened? Are we back at Dauntless? The last thing I remember was fighting Eric and I'm pretty sure I was losing."

Marlene laughs slightly. "Well… yes. You're in the Dauntless infirmary, and you were indeed losing." Marlene fills me in on what happened- the mission to rescue me, the condition I was in when they found me, taking Eric, Jeanine and Caleb prisoner. She tells me that a team was organized by Jack Kang to arrest the other Dauntless leaders, too, and since they were taken away, the rumor mills have been going wild. Marlene is one of the few who have any idea what actually happened.

"Four, Zeke and Edward took Jeanine, Eric and Caleb to Candor, along with that hard drive you took out of that computer," Marlene tells me. "And ah… Tris and I stole Jeanine's car to bring you back here." I can't believe we did it. We stopped Jeanine and Eric. Marlene won't throw herself off a building, my faction will not be forced to murder innocent people, we won't have to go to the Bureau…

But then I notice the way Marlene is chewing on her fingernails and avoiding my gaze. Something is wrong. There's something she didn't tell me. I know it. She said she and Tris stole a car to bring me back but… "Marlene," I say cautiously, "is Tris here?"

And that's when Marlene's eyes fill with tears, and my stomach drops like a rock. They had a car, what could have happened? "Marlene?" I swallow past the lump in my throat. "Marlene, what happened to Tris?"

She bites her lip and takes a deep breath, about to answer me, when the door opens. "Hey, you're alright!" Zeke says happily, though I detect a hint of sadness in his eyes. "What did the doctors say?" he asks Marlene.

"Surgery on his leg, had to insert a metal rod. Moderate concussion and a slight skull fracture but he'll be fine. The chemicals didn't cause permanent damage to his eye, either." Wow, we hadn't even gotten to that yet and I had been too worried about everything else to ask. "Did you find her?"

"We did," Zeke smiles. "Do you know what happened Uriah?" I shake my head no, and Marlene and Zeke explain about Tris's kidnapping and how Al helped Mar get me back here. If I didn't know they'd found Tris I would be freaking out right now. Zeke tells me about how they rescued Tris, and about Evelyn and Christina's deaths. Good riddance when it comes to Evelyn, but Christina's death hits me hard. We were pretty close at the Bureau, after she lost Will and I lost Marlene; this time, it's Will losing Chris. I just wish we could have saved everyone.

I ask if I can have a minute to talk with Tris, and Zeke leaves to get her. "I'll give you two a few minutes, too," Marlene says. I start to protest, but she puts a finger to my lips. "I know there's nothing for me to worry about between you two, and you have a bond that no one else can quite understand. I think you both need this." I nod and thank her for understanding, and as she leaves, Tris passes her on the way in.

Tris rushes in and wraps her arms around me as best she can with me laying in this bed. I kiss her on the cheek, and laugh at the blush on her cheeks when she pulls away from me. She grins, lightly punching me in the arm. "Shut up, Uri."

"So we really did it?" I ask. "We stopped a war?"

"We stopped a war," she nods, smiling, but then her lip trembles slightly.

"Marlene told me about Christina, and Evelyn. I'm sorry, Tris. How did it happen?"

"Chris I'm not sure about… I guess she was killed fighting off the factionless in that factory Evelyn was holding me in. Or at least unconscious, and the whole thing burned down with her in it." Tris bites the inside of her cheek and looks down at her hands. "I'm not worth other people's lives," she whispers.

I sigh. "You're not worth less than anyone else either, Tris," I tell her. "Christina was there helping get you out because she loved you. She knew this could happen. It was her decision, and you need to accept that, instead of feeling guilty for it."

She doesn't look convinced, so I continue. I know how she is, I know how she holds onto guilt, and I hate it. She will never believe her own worth. "Look, Tris, five of you came to Erudite to rescue _me,_ right? Someone could have been killed there as well, but you all still came, you weren't going to just let me die there. You were one of those five people who risked your life for me. Was it worth it?"

Tris looks shocked. "Of course it was! I could never just leave you to Jeanine, let her torture and execute you!"

"And Chris felt the same for you, or she wouldn't have been there," I interrupt. "I know you, Tris. I know you put everyone else before yourself and I think you're pretty amazing for it. But you deserve this as much as anyone else, probably more- maybe no one else knows everything you did the first time around, but I _do_ and you deserve this, and so does Four. Make Chris's death worth it by living the best life you can."

Tris chews on her lip, deep in thought for a minute, then finally makes eye contact with me and nods. "Thanks, Uriah. You're right."

"I always am," I tease, and she laughs.

 _ **Tris**_

When we're done at the infirmary and have then eaten dinner, we go straight to Tobias's apartment and both immediately flop down on his bed. Tobias pulls me close to him and I lay my head on his chest, our legs tangled together.

"I've never been so scared in my life, Tris," Tobias whispers, "as I was when I thought I might lose you."

"I love you, Tobias," I tell him. Those three words don't feel like enough to express the intensity with which I love this man. It surges through every inch of my body whenever he is near, the need and want, adoration and devotion. I love him through and through, his strengths and his weaknesses, his virtues and his flaws. Something about him makes me makes me feel like I am about to turn to liquid, or burst into flames.

And this man… he loves me in return.

Somehow our bodies have shifted, my head is no longer on his chest, and our faces are inches apart. We are sharing the same air. But we're not close enough.

Tobias leans in just a little further, and his lips just barely brush against mine as he says, "I love you, too, Tris." Then we finally connect. Our lips move against each other, my body presses against his, and we fit perfectly, like pieces of a puzzle. Our tongues mate, and my body is buzzing with the passion I feel for him. We move slowly, neither of us wanting to rush, both of us reveling in this perfect moment together, as we take our time undressing one another.

We take our time, as if we are memorizing every part of one another, and our lips rarely disconnect. We whisper I love yous and we gasp out each other's names, Tobias repeating mine like a prayer, as we both come undone. Tobias collapses next to me and pulls my sweaty body against his and pulls the blanket over us.

"I love you, Tris," he whispers, kissing the top of my head. "I don't know how I could ever live without you."

"You'll never have to find out now," I promise as I drift off to sleep.

 _ **Tobias**_

Two days have passed since we came back to Dauntless with Tris, two days since my mother died. A lot has happened in that time. The leaders and main conspirators in Jeanine's plot have been tried under truth serum; punishments range from execution for those leading this plan (such as Jeanine, Max and Eric) to memory serum, being made factionless, or at the lowest level, jail time.

Tris's brother, Caleb, was sentenced to a year imprisonment. Tris and Caleb's parents have forgiven Caleb, but are glad he has that year of jail time to contemplate his choices. They love Tris and accept me, and I know Tris is overjoyed that they survived this. I just wish that she could see them more often, but maybe that's something that we can improve with all the new leadership in place throughout the city. While 'Faction Before Blood' has protected me well from Marcus, in most families it only brings heartbreak.

All in all, there have been twenty-one Dauntless members and several dozen Erudite implicated, including Tris's fellow transfer initiate, Peter. As he hadn't actually participated in a crime as yet and is just an initiate, it was left to Dauntless to deal with. The tricky thing about leaving anything to Dauntless to make decisions on… is that all of our leaders are being executed. It was necessary to quickly appoint new leaders, which was done by a simple nomination and show of hands voting process with any faction members who showed up to participate. Tori, Harrison and myself were the three chosen, though we previously had five leaders- which is funny, because Tris says that we were the three chosen the first time she went through all this, too.

We, as a leadership team, decided that we would like two more leaders, but that we will pull them from the current initiate class after they complete their fear landscapes, which we pushed out to next week. Recent events have certainly proved that there are many brave, smart initiates who are determined to do the right thing- I know I want Tris on leadership at the very least. We also have decided Peter's fate, and will be turning him out to the factionless. A miserable coward like him has no place in Dauntless.

I stand on a wooden box in front of the chasm. This may be my first time conducting a Dauntless funeral, but I know, unfortunately, it won't be the last. Tris stands right up front between Will and Uriah and the look on her face makes my heart break, though I'm thankful for her conversation with Uriah a few days ago. I don't know exactly what he said to her, but I know it was the right thing. Myra and Al have been staying at Dauntless while we sort out their situation- currently, discussion with Johanna Reyes from Amity are going well- and Al has been a helpful support for Will as he grieves the girl he loved, who was taken from him much too soon. I keep a close eye on Uri because, well… he's drinking… on crutches… by the chasm.

Harrison sounds the gong and the Dauntless quiet down- as much as Dauntless do, anyway.

"We are here," I begin, "because Christina, an initiate, died helping her friend and fellow initiate. Christina was brave in her final moments; she did not hesitate to help someone who needed her protection, and she proved herself truly Dauntless. It would be easy to mourn her loss tonight, but we did not choose a life of ease when we became Dauntless, and tonight we celebrate her bravery and her sacrifice. Christina was not yet one of our members, but she was certainly one of our bravest!"

Yells and cheers ring out, and flasks are raised to the air. Uriah passes a flask to Tris, and I see her take a swig before handing it to Will. My gaze lingers on his red, puffy eyes and tear-streaked face. I don't want to imagine what my reaction would have been- what it was- when Tris died. I force myself to look away.

"To Christina!" I shout, and the crowd chants her name over and over, continuing even once the syllables lose all meaning. I step down from the wooden box and wrap Tris in my arms.

An hour later, members have scattered from the area by the chasm, but we remain, along with our friends, telling stories about Christina and laughing, and it feels good. Right now, I can finally see why Dauntless treats death the way they do- they treat it the same way they treat life. Abnegation always treated death as a somber occasion, which makes sense, except that looking back, that's also how they treated life. In Dauntless, life and death are both approached as something that should be lively and full, and that's how Christina lived her life, as well.

 _ **Tris**_

When I enter Tobias's apartment, I automatically take off my shoes by the door and head straight for his bed. I smile remembering coming here after the fear landscape last time. That was when he first showed me his tattoo.

As Tobias is now a leader, he had to stay back to finalize the rankings, so I wait here for him to come home. For the last week, since we got back here to Dauntless, I have been staying here with Tobias instead of in the dorms, and last night he asked me to move in, instead of getting my own apartment when the rest of the initiates do tomorrow. Of course, I said yes.

I look up when I hear the door open, and Tobias smiles at me as he slips off his shoes. "You were incredible, baby," he says as he crosses the room and sits down next to me on the bed. "I guess they can call us Four and Six."

I laugh. "You know, last time I had seven fears, not six."

"Did you?"

I nod. "My fears were mostly the same this time. In the one where I have to shoot my family, you weren't there the first time around."

"So what fear have you overcome?"

I smile and feel my cheeks heat up. "I had a fear of intimacy," I admit. You said maybe someday, if I still wanted to, we could..." I swallow and glance away. "And then maybe you wouldn't be in my fear landscape any more, and then everyone could call me Six." Tobias laughs. Somehow it feels really special to me when he says the same things he did the first time. It's like he's still getting to experience our relationship building in a similar way, even though everything is a bit different this time, because I am different.

"Well, while I'd wait as long as you needed me to, I'm kind of glad that you overcame that fear," Tobias says with a smirk before leaning in and gently pressing his lips to mine.

The kiss starts out tender and sweet but I quickly deepen it. My fingers tangle in Tobias's hair as he gently runs his hand up my side, under my shirt. He pulls me closer and I feel his erection pressing against my leg; my hands automatically begin to move to unzip his pants, then I roll away from him onto my back and groan. "I wish we had more time right now," I pout. The banquet will begin in twenty minutes and we obviously both need to be there.

Tobias smirks. "Me too, but we'll have plenty of time tonight."

"And tomorrow, and every night after," I smile. "We finally have all the time in the world."

"Before we go to the banquet, I wanted to tell you something," Tobias says. I turn on my side and keep eye contact with him. "You know what my tattoos mean to me, who I want to be. And I think the most important part of being _smart_ is to be smart about the choices I make, because choices affect more than just ourselves- they affect the people around us, who in turn affect the people around them." I nod. I don't know where he is going with this.

"I don't regret choosing you over my mother the other day, not at all, so please don't think that when I say this." A knot forms in my stomach as I nervously wait to hear what he has to say. "I want to press charges against Marcus. I think Evelyn's hatred for the faction system stemmed from the abuse Marcus inflicted on her, on us. I want to honor my mother by standing up to him. I don't want that bastard to get away with all the damage he has done. It's also something I carry with me and I doubt myself- I chose this faction for cowardly reasons. I think the only way to get past that is to be brave now and do what I should have done back then."

I am in awe, and pride surges through me like a shockwave. Tobias may have been forced to tell about Marcus in Candor under the truth serum last time, but I never thought I'd see a day that he would voluntarily admit what his childhood was like.

"I'm so proud of you, Tobias," I say earnestly. "That's a difficult choice to make, and I know how closely you have guarded that secret. It take a lot of courage to make a decision like this. You're going to be an amazing leader, you know."

He pulls me on top of him for a slow kiss, but we begin to hear loud footsteps out in the hall. "The banquet," he says with a groan.

"Come on," I laugh. "I want to go see if I still make first rank."

 _ **Uriah**_

While we wait for the rankings, Marlene, Lynn, Edward, Will and I play a drinking version of a card game. We're all a bit buzzed now and I think it has helped ease all our nerves. I know I shouldn't be too nervous, but somehow I can't help it. Marlene looked so nervous earlier I was afraid she might be sick.

Tris slides into the empty seat next to me and I see Four doing something with a computer in the corner- probably getting the program ready to display the rankings on the giant screen on the wall. We all abandon our game and wait anxiously.

"What if I get stuck guarding the fence?" Marlene groans. "Or worse, what if I get cut?!"

I chuckle. "You won't get cut, Mar, and I don't think you'll be guarding the fence, either."

"You'll do great!" Tris chimes in.

Will looks dejected, as he always does lately. "Well, I guess we're about to find out." He motions to Four, who is climbing onto a table, microphone in hand, as Tori and Harrison stand off to the side. Four taps on the microphone and slowly the chatter surrounding us dies out.

"We have a batch of new members to welcome into the faction. We believe in freedom from fear. We believe in justice. We believe in ordinary acts of bravery. We believe in action. We welcome you as you have shown us that you believe in these things, too." Cheers roar through the crowd, and Four patiently waits for the noise to die down. Marlene and I grin at each other; the anxiety is still there, but excitement is overtaking it. Tris bounces in her seat next to me.

"I know what you're all waiting for: the rankings. So now I'll stop making you wait. They will appear on the screen behind me." As he says the last word, the screen lights up with a numbered list with the names and pictures of the initiates. As I read it, yells and applause, pounding fists and feet, all echo throughout the room.

Tris

Uriah

Edward

Lynn

Marlene

Gabe

Will

Kate

Luke

Tyler

Marlene tackles me in a hug, and I almost fall out of my seat. A moment later she's sitting on my good leg, and she cups the back of my head in one of her hands and pulls me in for a passionate kiss. When we break apart, I notice Tris and Four making out nearby and laugh.

The next hour is a blur as Zeke and Shauna, Mom, people I barely know and people I don't even know the names of are all congratulating us, but Tris and me in particular, as they walk past. Tris and Four have joined in on our drinking game. I nudge her. "You're finally Dauntless enough to celebrate, huh?"

"As I have heard you say many times, Uriah, I'm Dauntless through and through."

We laugh, we drink, we play. Four actually genuinely laughs and smiles- a lot. I never thought I'd see the day that happened. Tomorrow, we get our own apartments, and choose our jobs. We get to do all the things we didn't before. We finally get to experience life as it should have been, thanks to that second chance.


	34. Epilogue

_**Author's Note:**_

 _ **Thank you for reading this story! I really loved giving these characters (especially Uriah and Tris!) a different, better end to their story. The epilogue is coming up right after this note, and I have no plans for a sequel at the moment- I have too many other ideas I'd like to explore!**_

 _ **Those of you who have commented/reviewed, it means so much to me that you take the time to give me feedback, and it keeps me going. Thank you so much.**_

 _ **I also want to shout out a thank you, again, to FourTrisHEA, my friend and fellow writer, for all her help and encouragement along the way! This story would not be what it is without her input.**_

 _ **I've been working on a couple other stories, as I mentioned in my last author's note:**_

 _ **First- TODAY I'm posting the first chapter of my new fanfic, which is called**_ _ **Roommates**_ _ **. It's AU, the gang is in college. It will be M rated as I feel like it'll be kind of dark at times.**_

 _ **Second- I'm so excited about this one! I will be co-writing with my wonderful friend FourTrisHEA. We met through through writing Fourtris, and her stories are awesome. We've been developing this idea and will start actually writing soon, so I would expect to have something published here (it will be through my account) in a few weeks. Hint: Fourtris will begin in gray (Abnegation)!**_

 _ **Thanks again, and I hope you enjoy the Epilogue!**_

* * *

 **EPILOGUE  
** Three years later

 _ **Tris**_

Navy Pier is one of my favorite places because of the memories it holds- important, cherished memories for Tobias and me. That's probably a large part of why, when Uriah asked me to collaborate on a proposal to the council to restore the fairgrounds, I immediately agreed. Uriah brought up the idea almost as soon as we finished our leader-in-training programs, but we took our time and waited almost a year to present it to the council. Dauntless are often taken less seriously than the other factions' leaders simply because we are so young and they consider us "reckless hooligans," so we wanted to develop a bit more of a rapport with the other leaders before suggesting something they might deem so frivolous.

We were ecstatic when they ultimately approved our proposal. Tobias, Uriah and I do have more clout than young Dauntless leaders would in most circumstances due to our roles in preventing a war. The city has also been working toward becoming more unified and appreciating the virtues of other factions more. We all work to promote the ideas of interdependence and balance- that we are stronger together, that the beliefs of all five factions have merit, and that each of their roles benefits the city as a whole. As a part of that initiative, the Faction Before Blood laws have loosened, making it possible to keep a relationship with family members in other factions, or even sometimes friends. We also are treating the factionless more fairly by allowing the children opportunities to attend school and participate in the choosing ceremony, and exceptions are much more common if a change in faction is necessary, such as an initiate failing initiation.

The Navy Pier Restoration Project is a part of the effort to unify the factions, as it is a common place for _everyone_ to enjoy. Today is the day all our efforts pay off and the park reopens for the first time in at least two centuries. I can hardly wait, and I know Uriah is even more anxious than I am. He has big plans for this event.

Tobias and I make the walk from the train to the Pier trailing a ways behind our loud, rambunctious friends, holding hands in companionable silence. When the ferris wheel comes into view, he turns and grins at me before pulling me in with his palm pressed to the small of my back and dipping me backwards as he kisses me. I laugh as he supports my back while I regain my balance.

"You're going to ride that with me today," I inform him.

Tobias scoffs, shaking his head. "Not a chance."

"You're no fun," I pout, but I'm still determined to get him on that thing someday. "Come on." I pull him along to catch up with our friends.

Navy Pier is unlike anything I have ever seen before. The rides have all been restored and freshly painted, and some of them play cheerful music. People in all colors mill around the park, though most are in Candor black and white, Dauntless black, or Amity yellow and red. I pull Tobias along by the hand when I see Al and Myra in line for the carousel and he chuckles at my childish excitement.

Al greets me with a side hug, and Tobias shakes his hand. "It's so good to see you both!" Myra says as she squeezes my arm, their baby is asleep on her shoulder. Myra and Al were married about a year ago, and most of our Dauntless initiation class attended the ceremony. It was beautiful, as most things in Amity are. Al and Myra came to Tobias and my wedding the year before, as well.

"Oh, she is getting so big!" I coo, taking a peek at the baby's face. "And beautiful. She looks just like you, Myra."

"Thank you. If only she slept as well at night as she is here on my shoulder. It's almost as if the noise helps her sleep!" We laugh and talk, then when our turn comes for the ride we wave goodbye as we each pick out a wooden horse to ride.

* * *

I left Tobias chatting with my parents a few minutes ago. They love him almost as if he were one of their own children and over time, he has become more and more comfortable with others caring for him. We see my father often at council meetings- when Marcus was convicted of spousal and child abuse- as well as conspiracies and other smaller crimes related to his position of power, which came out during his truth serum trial- and was sentenced to a total wipe by memory serum, after which he will live out his life factionless- my father was voted to take Marcus's former position as head councilman. We don't see my mother as often, but we do make a point to have a meal with her at least every month or two.

Tobias turned me down when I invited him to come with Caleb and me on the Wave Swinger, a ride with swings just like at a playground, except for it spins really fast, making the swings fly outward so the chains are nearly horizontal to the ground.

"It's really quite fascinating how these rides work," Caleb says. "For example in this one, at a particular angle, the chain provides the necessary horizontal force…" I tune him out. It's not as bad as his interest in water filtration systems when we were stuck at Amity that time, but still, it kind of takes the fun out of it for me, even if I do have an Erudite aptitude.

I hear someone shout my name and turn my head to see Uriah and Marlene running toward me, grinning, and I can't help but grin back. More slowly, Zeke, Shauna, and their little one-year-old boy, Carson, follow behind them.

Marlene tackles me in a hug before holding out her left hand, showing off a beautiful engagement ring with one white diamond in the center and smaller black stones on either side. "We're getting married!" she squeals and I laugh.

"About time, Uriah!" I tease, punching him playfully in the shoulder. "He's had that ring for months!"

"Thanks for helping me pick it out, Trissy," Uriah grins, putting one arm around Marlene and the other around my shoulders.

Marlene smirks. "That explains it, then." Uriah raises an eyebrow. "I was so impressed that you picked out the perfect ring- now I know how you did it. You were smart enough to ask Tris for help!"

"And that's why Tris and me are a package deal," Uriah quips. "Can't separate us when we're such a good team." Going through what we did together, Uriah and my bond is unbreakable, and he's my very best friend, besides Tobias. It was a huge relief to us both when Marlene accepted that. Now, Mar is one of my closest friends as well. It's funny to think how jealous she was during initiation.

Zeke and Shauna finally catch up to us, now with Tobias in tow. I raise my eyebrows. "Change your mind? Did you finally become Dauntless enough for the Wave Swinger?"

Tobias scowls. "Well, somebody has to stay back and take care of Carson. It's not a reflection of my Dauntlessness, I'm just being a good friend."

"Dauntlessness isn't a word," Caleb corrects him. "It would be more-"

"I don't care, Caleb," Tobias interrupts.

"Leader vote! Is _Dauntlessness_ a word? All who say yea, raise your hands!" Uriah announces, and his, Tobias' and my hands shoot up in the air. "If Tris, Four and I all say it's a word, then we have a majority of Dauntless leaders even without the other two here. _Dauntlessness_ is officially a word."

"I don't think-"

"Nope, sorry, Caleb," I laugh. "You are overruled."

On the ride, Caleb covers his eyes the whole time while I laugh at him- he's white as a ghost and appears to be basically frozen in place. Behind me, I hear Zeke whooping and Uriah shrieking out the same strangled cat scream I heard from him the first time we ziplined, with Marlene next to him laughing hysterically. I turn in my seat and raise an eyebrow at her. We can mostly communicate through our facial expressions by now and I know she understands my message- 'are you sure you want to marry this pansycake?'- when she laughs even harder and nods her head.

After the ride is over, Tobias and I break away from our friends. We're near the ferris wheel and I notice it has no line. "Please?" I beg. "It's sunset- the view will be so beautiful. Come on it this once, for me?" Tobias looks like he's about to waver, and then suddenly he stiffens. I turn around, following his gaze, and my eyes widen. Marcus is wandering through the park and he's coming our way. I don't see any sign that he recognizes us, same as the other time we saw him on the street, due to his memory wipe, but that does not stop Tobias from tensing on the rare occasion that we see him, though.

I pull him toward the gondola with me and, desperate to avoid Marcus, he doesn't resist. I'm excited that I got him on here, though, because I know how to distract him from his fear, and I also wanted to tell him something.

As the wheel turns and the gondola rises higher, Tobias groans. "Why did I let you drag me on here?" I laugh and pull him close to me and crash my lips to his. His hand automatically goes to the small of my back, pushing me closer, as I tug at his curly hair. It's longer than it was during my initiation, and I love the way it feels so soft between my fingers.

The wheel stops when we are at the very top, and I pull away, but keep eye contact. "I always felt like this was the place where everything changed," I say softly to him. "That's why I wanted to come on here with you."

Tobias nods. "It was on this ferris wheel that I decided that I wanted to tell you about myself. It's a special place to me, too."

"It's my turn to tell you something," I say nervously. I'm not sure why I am so nervous- I know he'll be happy. His intense, insistent dark blue eyes stare right into mine. I could still just get lost in those eyes, I feel like I could drown in them. He squeezes my hand, the one he hasn't let go of since we got on this ride. I take a deep breath. "We're going to have a baby!"

Tobias grins and laughs, then crashes his lips to mine. "I can't imagine my life without you, Tris."

I'm so glad I chose to come back to him, chose to live and stay with him. I will always choose him. I lean my forehead against his. "You don't have to."


End file.
